The Mega(man) Battle Network LP!

Jim tells Lan to tell Raoul that Jim sent him. He warns Lan that if his passport reached the Undernet, he’s doomed.

Outside the Underground is Higsby, who apparently teleported here while we weren’t looking. He’s happy to see Megaman and Lan have made up.






By the way…



You can enter Netopia Castle right now, but none of the Officials will do their job and help Lan get his stuff back.



Naturally, Douche is just standing here brooding.

You can jack into that statue to find an Unlocker sub chip.

Okay, back to the plot.





…I’m just going to switch out of Aqua Custom now.




Thunderman! As one person once put it, he is the bane of all 100% completionists.



First off, these clouds constantly move left and right through their rows. As far as I can tell they can not be destroyed.



Every now and then Thunderman will make two of the clouds hold thunderballs. If you line up with one of them (horizontally or vertically) it’ll be fired at you.

If you stand next to a cloud for too long (it‘ll stop before hitting you), this happens. It will not flinch you though (in this picture I was flinching from an earlier attack).



Finally, every now and then Thunderman will drop a bolt of lighting on your panel. He will do this three times in a row.

Thunderman stays in the back row, so Lance is really good against him. Sadly, I do not have that chip. I’m not even sure if it’s in this game. Oddly enough, none of his attacks stun Megaman.

This battle is one annoying dodging game. In fact, it’s basically Gateman if he had three Remote Gates, only these Remote Gates go on your side of the field and prevent you from avoiding some of his attacks.



Here’s an example.

Note that it becomes a lot easier if you use Seed Bomb chips, which can be set as your Regular chip. Rock Cube punching also works, but Thunderman moves a little too fast to effectively use it.

What you really want to do though is Area Grab ASAP since that puts Thunderman in range of most of the chips you’ll have at this point.




Woo-hoo.






And with that…



Lan becomes part of a gang. His codename is Samurai.

Raoul’s Radio has a Navi +20* and a Bug Frag in BMDs.




Anyways, Netopia is separated into two areas. The Square is accessible from Netopia 2, where we start, but I’m going to go check out Netopia 1 first.



Sweet.

Prisms are funny. If you use them, Megaman will throw a prism three panels ahead. If it lands on something, that something will take 100 damage. If it doesn’t land on something, though, you can use its real effect.

If anything that isn’t a breaking attack hits a prism, its damage is spread out to the eight panels around the prism. The prism will eventually fade, but until it does you can absolutely ruin the enemy.

Incidentally, in the Japanese version of BN2 there’s a glitch with the chips Prism and Tree Bomb 2. If you threw said Tree Bomb at the Prism… the bomb wouldn’t disappear. In other words, it would keep on hitting the prism, and the prism would keep on spreading the damage. This meant anything standing next to the prism would take infinite damage.

Anyways, past Netopia 1 is Den 3.

Yeah, I think they may have translated this badly, because there’s only one Numberman.



Nothing really of note except Custom Sword. Custom Sword hits a massive radius (3 x 2 area), but its damage is dependent on the Custom Gauge. As it fills up it does more damage, but when the Custom Gauge is completely full it does zero damage.



YESYESYESYESYES.

Excuse me while I go find Airm- oh, right, all my chips in my bag are gone. Never mind then.

Okay, BMDs. Netopia 1 had a Bug Frag, and a Recover 50 *. Netopia 2 just had a Bug Frag.

Now to Netopia Square.











Pretty sure I had that.




Alright then, it should be pretty obvious we have to head to the Undernet. Netopia 3 links there.

First though…



Yet another Netdealer.





Netopia 3 starts off with a bunch of one way panels. Three of them lead to a dead end with a warp back to the start. The one we want to go to is the fourth from the left.













Lan and Megaman cheer.



Megaman suggests we check back with Jim.

Netopia 3 has a BMD with a HPMemory and a PMD with a Cannon Ball *.

Well damn.





If you didn’t manage to get a Guard * chip by the way (pretty hard not to considering how many Mettaurs there are in Netopia Area), a nearby NPC from Electopia will give you 30.











Unlike Sal and Miyu, I can’t pretend Ms. Millions is around Lan’s age. So the pedo vibes are inescapable.

YES SOMETHING SIMPLE FOR ONCE.




Snakeman, like most BN2 bosses, has an annoying gimmick. But unlike other bosses, he has two.



First, his jar. As long as he’s hiding in it (which he will do if you‘re in the same row as him), he can’t take damage. Second, snakes will constantly rise from that pit in front of him and they will launch themselves down their row. These guys can be easily destroyed but they can get frustrating.



His only attack right now is a machine gun in his hand that will chase Megaman.

Anyways, Snakeman does not move. This fact, along with his gimmick of hiding in a jar actually makes him really easy.

To win, you just have to stay in a separate row, wait for him to raise his hand, and then counter. Alternatively, for throwing chips (which are actually useful since he doesn’t move), just throw it and move to a separate row before it lands. Tree Bombs are really useful since they stay on the field for a bit.

Do note that some chips can hit Snakeman before he can duck back into his pot. Bubbler is one of these. Aqua Custom’s charge shot is a Bubbler (amusingly enough, a Heat Style would be absolutely useless here).

Reset time.




That is my first S rank against a boss in a while.



JUST STOP.

Mr. Million’s purse has a Wood +40*. It’s essentially a quick link to the Undernet and, surprisingly, Yum 2.



We can’t pass through to Yum 2 though.

Now that I have all of my stuff, there’s two things I have to do.




That’s one…




Oh come on.

Ah well, I guess I’ll do that later.



Alright, time to advance the plot.

Next time: Zombies. Also, Douche justifies his nickname.

Current Folder

Shotgun *
Cross Gun *
Bubbler R x4
Tree Bomb R x2
Wide Sword * x3
Fire Blade R x4
Guts Punch B
Cold Punch B x3
Area Grab R - REGULAR
Rock Cube * x3
Attack +10 * x5
Attack +30 *
Roll V2 R

Total codes (not counting * code): 2

And here I thought the complaints about the Battle Network games were just hyperbole.

You mentioned a while back that you can store up to two styles for combat, right? Could we see a runner up style (i.e. Shield) for when you fight more Elec bosses?

I'll have to battle 280 more times before I can get a new style.

I'll get it eventually.

Which brings up this question- how are you going to choose your 2nd style, your choice, viewers choice, or whatever the game sticks you with?

Well when I get it, I'll leave it up to you guys if I should keep what I have or if I should just hack it to something else.

Busy busy busy busy.

New update.



Lan and Megaman exchange good mornings. Megaman is surprised to see Lan awake so early.

Lan snickers and declares that its time to go to the Official NetBattler Meeting.

As soon as we leave the hotel, we get some mail.





Okay, I guess that makes sen-



Or you could use a stupid cipher.

Reading the capitals, we get NET CASTLE. Of course, there’s nowhere else we could go, so yeah.




So yeah, there’s a secret passage.







Surprisingly, Raoul is here.




Ah, so you’re here so the Officials don’t look racist.

Custom sprite? Doesn’t immediately challenge us to a Net Battle? Okay, we’ve found our villain of the scenario.

Eventually another NPC walks in.







Then there’s this random guy.




Hate to break it to you, but you are.

Anyways, after talking to everyone the meeting starts.



A man walks in.



…What? We’ve got one person from Creamland, two guys from Electopia and three from Netopia. Sharo, Yumland, and Netfrica have got nothing.



The man notes that they should introduce themselves to each other first.



Jennifer notes that loads of incidents have been breaking out lately, so they shouldn’t waste time.

Pride agrees.






Oh not this again. Lan saved the freaking world just a (few) month(s) ago! Even the head of Gospel is keeping an eye on him!

And Douche, well he’s just world famous.

Way to be mature guys.



Raoul exclaims that they should just get on with the meeting.



Well, let’s see. They’re clearly based in Electopia right now considering that’s where all of the attacks have been recently (barring the attack on Yumland, but that was immediately followed by an assault on the Mother Computer). They’re obviously well organized, and considering they were able to hire Shadowman they must have some source of cash.

The way I see it, there are two options. Either search the Undernet to find a lead, or track the Electopian banks to see if there was a large movement of money around the time Yumland was destroyed.



…Okay, that came right out of left field.





Okay, that’s bad.




Wait, what? If it’s a digital being by definition it can be deleted. And if worst comes to worst, just trap it inside an offline server and disconnect it from the Net.

Seriously, the Officials in the BN series rarely realize they’re dealing with a digital world.



The man directs the group to look at the screen.




The screen begins to shake.



Jennifer warns everyone to look out.




Raoul shouts for everybody to run.

Look at that surprise.



Johnson, Pride, and Lan scream as they fall.







And he didn’t die from impact?

Megaman asks if Lan is okay, and if he can move.




Lan shakes his head a few times, and stands up. He then gets a phone call.







Your method of dealing with intruders is to open up a trap hole under them?



Oh, so this castle is just trapped. Never mind.



Well that came out of nowh-

Well shoot.



Apparently this is a conference call.












Once you walk into the next room and take a few steps, Megaman shouts for Lan to watch out.




Megaman reminds Lan that the traps have been activated, and asks if there’s anywhere they can jack in.

Don’t ask why Lan doesn’t just crouch under the arrow’s trajectory.

No, really?




So yeah, the battlefield will start with some cracked panels. Why they didn’t just decide to put in holes is beyond me.

While you move through this dungeon, at some spots an aggressive program will spawn and chase you. There are three in total, and I’ll explain them as they appear.



Vampires drain HP, but you’ll only lose 100, no big deal. Since Vampires move slower than you, you can outmaneuver them with the various loops this area has.

The way forward is blocked by a door.



This key will open it.



So that’s the puzzle in a nutshell. Avoid the dangerous programs, find the key, and move on.




Zombies will take you back to the nearest tomb. They do not examine branch pathways though, so use that to your advantage.

BMDs held 1000 Z and a HPMemory.



Megaman will disable the program.



Before we can leave to the next room, we get another phone call.



Jennifer asks if anything happened.

As soon as we enter the next room…



The doors slam shut.



Megaman alerts Lan that the ceiling is falling.





I don’t see any splattered remains anywhere, so I call bull.




Megaman volunteers for the job.





Due to the way this area is structured, I ended up following these two guys for a bit.



Oh, right, forgot about these guys.

Dominerds are essentially living shields. They’ll move up and down their columns, and if they line up with Megaman they’ll fly forward and bite Megaman. If there are other enemies on the field though, they’ll become invisible and guard them (or maybe that’s just BN5).

Thing is, they have something called Stone Body. This makes them take one damage from anything besides breaking attacks. However, when they attack they drop this passive ability, so to beat them you’ll need to counter them.

They drop Curse Shield chips, which act like super versions of the Guard chip.

BMDs held a Repair C, a Full Energy, and a Sword S.

Yeah, Bandits are jerks like that. Don’t worry though.



Oh yeah, I didn’t actually get a picture of the bandit.



Bandits move fast (speed of Megaman‘s run), but they will always turn to the left whenever given the choice.




I don’t know why he says that, because as soon as you jack out the ceiling has stopped moving.

Princess Pride notes that she should go with you, but she then exclaims that she dropped her best battle chip, and as such can not go with Lan. She then urges Lan to get going.



Seriously, obvious villain here.

As we enter the next room, the door slams again, and Lan’s phone rings again.








So apparently the villain of this scenario was right behind Lan the whole time despite the fact Lan started in a closed room.

Seriously, Pride? You really suck at this whole villain thing.




Megaman guesses that her phone must have turned on by accident, as she’s focused on the battle.

So the ceiling started falling again…?

The screen shakes.









Where’s Douche in all this actually?



Anyways, the room we’re in now is a long staircase. At the top is Jennifer.

Lan tells Jennifer to pull herself together.



She’s totally lying, as you can keep on talking to her.



As you go into the next room, the door closes again. Amusingly enough, Lan looks at this, then turns around without any comment. He’s already used to it.

Then…



Megaman asks if Lan is okay. Lan replies that he’s fine, he was just surprised.






This is remarkably serious.

Apparently Lan’s a master at darts.



New virus. Shadows will appear on your side of the field in all sorts of shapes, and they can only be damaged by Sword chips. They drop Shadow chips, which will make Megaman immune to all non-sword damage for a while.
Since you can only beat them with Sword chips, an L button escape from them is guaranteed.

Once you go past the first door, Megaman will ask if Lan got another call.















Lan, Douche has been doing Official work since before the first game. You saw him risk his life trying to stop Dave. That’s ridiculous and you know it.

Castle Computer 3’s BMDs held a Sub Memory, a RegUp1, and 1200 Z.

In the next room… (man, I really need to stop abusing ellipses)







Okay, pretend you’re Douche here. You’ve entered a room and you see the smoking body of a ally and a friend crouching near them.

That friend has recently saved the Internet twice, and before your very eyes help repulsed two Gospel attacks. You have worked with this somebody, and know he is the grandson of the creator of the Net and an extremely righteous young man.

Would you:

A) Tell your friend to move out of the way and use your amazing Official Deus Ex Machida skills to save your ally’s life.
B) Realize that since it’s quite frankly impossible for your friend to be evil, that someone faked their death.
C) Notice the fact that your friend is tending to your ally’s wounds and as such is trying to keep him alive, not kill him.
D) Realize that your friend could not have possible set off the traps, as he is both new to Netopia and hasn’t been anywhere near the castle since he’s gotten here.
E) Accuse your friend of being in Gospel.

If you picked anything besides E…



You’re smarter than Douche.

Next time: Protoman is such an ass.

Current Folder

Shotgun *
Cross Gun *
Bubbler R x4
Tree Bomb R x2
Wide Sword * x3
Fire Blade R x4
Guts Punch B
Cold Punch B x3
Area Grab R - REGULAR
Rock Cube * x3
Attack +10 * x5
Attack +30 *
Roll V2 R

Total codes (not counting * code): 2

Dangit douche, you're better then that! Eventually anyways...
Also this is why they never carry around medkits anymore- they know they'll need em eventually but are too 'technologically advanced' now for them.
Or they don't care who they kill off until they realize that person has a navi.
Go choice A!

What a chump.

Also, douche sure is stupid.

The Guard * thing makes even less sense when you realize that Netopia's net still has Mettaur viruses, which drop Guard *'s.

I only played the first Battle Network game and that Gamecube platformer one.

I don't remember either one being so flat-out stupid. Kid-oriented maybe. Stupid, not so much.

Shouldn't that be Douche Ex Machina??

Sorry, saw a pun opportunity and had to take it! :-)

At least BN2 is more fun. Also, when you're actually playing the game and not looking at it from afar, it's easy to take the goofiness in stride. Or at least, SO MUCH easier than it is to in BN3.

Too bad douche here isn't smart enough to know how to do one either way XD