I use my Broadsword. Let's play HeroQuest!

Aerdan's turn

Being a little pre-emptive, I'm going to move 6 squares to F10. Hopefully those not-Guts fellows can finally deal with all those monsters and meet up with me in the area past the door at around K13.

Moving to K14 and searchin' for treasure. If I haven't done that in here already (which I don't remember if i have and it's not listed on the character profile snapshots).

No one's searched that room yet.

You look through the weapons rack, hoping to find an equipment upgrade. There are several weapons here that would be promising if they weren't so thoroughly rusted. Unfortunately, nothing here is of any use to you.

I'll have you know, a rusty weapon can be even more useful than a properly-cared-for one. More likely to cause nasty infections to your victims, and if it's really badly rusted, it'll probably leave fragments of the metal from the weapon in them too. Or is this "Fantasy Rust", which somehow manages to also dull blades and eat away at all of the mass of weapons and armor, rendering them about as effective as a rolled-up newspaper that's been dipped in tea?

Oh who am I kidding? Of course it's Fantasy Rust.

Roku will move to J-14 and do nothing else.

Evil Turn

Zargon applies another coat of Fantasy Rust(TM) to the weapons in his lair.

Guys there is another monster in the room why didn't you helpe fight it?

Oh. I see.

Racism.

Wow, you're right. It would appear we all forgot about that lone bad guy, even his boss didn't remember he was there.

Did you want to attack it? Because it's totally going to take a chunk out of Loki.

No not my chunks!

Oh don't worry, Dwarf Chunks haven't been a problem since 40d. Nowadays your various orphaned bits are described in grotesque detail.

(And that's my obligatory Dwarf Fortress reference for the day.)

Given the option, Roku moves to I-18 instead and tries to stab the Orc, but misses.

Guts Bush doesn't care about Dwarf People!

The orc responds with a playful stab, dealing 1 damage. Then he retreats into the corridor to limit his exposure to stabs and things. (Hey, look! My orcs have tactics!)



Back to Frupladlusfidrotus.

That is completely out of character XD

I guess your orcs are a cut above the rest. Still only 1 HP though...

How is running for its dear life out of character? They're stupid enough to take on GUTS. It only makes sense that they'd judge those who have the misfortune of not being GUTS to be out of their league.

Aren't these the goblins in the not GUTS area?

Now if they were fighting GUTS it would be out of character not to run as you said.

Indications of my sense of humor: Despite all of the good lines in this thread thus far, this is the one that made me lose it. Funny looks from coworkers and everything.

We need dwarf power to form Captain Planet!

Let our powers combine!
Earth!
Fire!
Wind!
Water!
Dwarf?

I move to the Orc and use my dwarf ring to summon the power of dwarf to do one hit. (The power of dwarf is an axe.) The Orc fails to dodge.

Then I get drunk and fall down.

Back to Aerdan!

2d6=11 -- Moving to G9.

A WILD GOBLIN APPEARS! And runs by me!

GUTS TIME.

I'm going to follow it into that room there and kill it!

Roku moves to J-14. He's not the kind of Wizard that likes to bleed.

G9 is inside a room. Opening the room reveals a large table and two goblins. You just interrupted poker night; they don't look happy.



You can redo the rest of your move after opening the door if you want; you can also use your action (e.g. to attack).

Roku, feel free to adjust your move as well. We'll get back to Clobberin' Time (Starring Guts) after the two of you and any remaining goblins have moved.

Show them a card trick, Aerdan! Dazzle them with your elf magic!

Sylvis sketches an elaborate pentagram in the air, inscribing within it the identity of his target. A Genie appears to attack the goblin at G8 who, despite its best efforts still takes 2 damage.