A Brief History of Time (Ocarina of Time)

Master sword music = goosebumps on demand.

I don’t know why I try and set dates for when I’m going to update. I always end up taking longer than I’d like, and now I look like a jerk for violating my “hey I promise this next update won’t take a week”-claim. Well, whatever. Nothing I can do about it now except move forward. We’re oh-so-near the first truly great dungeon in the game. Today’s update will see us pick up some new gear as we prepare to conquer the evils of the Forest Temple.

Special thanks go out to djsyndrome, who I don’t think actually reads this but whatever. He brought the tool I used to create the new titles in this update to my attention, and for that you have my gratitude.



When we last left Blondie, he was fighting off what used to be some kind of villager in what’s left of Hyrule Castle Town. Interesting Tidbit: if you’ll remember from our first encounter with ReDeads, a ReDead’s main attack is to look at you, causing the camera to shift behind you and freeze you in place. Since the camera is fixed in this area, you cannot be frozen in place by these particular ReDead’s gaze. This makes this area essentially harmless despite the fact that it’s packed with ghouls.



Eager to flee from the destruction, Blondie heads out towards Hyrule Field. The Pot Filled Room of Rupee Replenishing is now gone, but the building itself is still intact. In its place is a mysterious NPC who will buy peculiar items from you. More on this later.



Damn it. Damn it! Did you see what happened?! What…those used to be the villagers! Oh man, this is bad. This is really bad. I ca-

Hey! Just calm down, Blondie! We’ve got to think! That Ninja said something about Kakariko right? We’ve got to head there so we can go find the Sages and save this place!

Kak-Navi, did you see those things?! Did you see what happened to the town?! And it’s our fault!

Well, Zelda’s fault really.

Yeah but…I went along with it! It’s my fault too! We both didn’t know what we doing! How cou-

Listen, pansy. You need to man the fuck up right now. This is my LP and you’re the hero, so you’d better start acting like one. Yeah, you fucked up. Let this be a lesson to you all (as it was for me when I was a kid): actions have consequences. You’ve got to deal with them. We’re going to go find that Sage in the Forest Temple, and you’re going to save the day.

…Alright. Alright, I get it. Let’s go. Let me just grab my Sling-



Oh what the hell is this shit.

Turning into an adult leaves Blondie unable to access the majority of his inventory from when he was a child. There’s no real logical reason for this, other than to mix the gameplay up a bit. Very shortly we’ll be finding a replacement for the Boomerang and Slingshot, so this isn’t as big of a deal as it might seem.

Although Sheik told us to head to Kakariko Village, we have some important business to attend to first in Lon Lon Ranch.

What? What kind of business?

Why, a horse, of course!

That’s terrible.





Of all the areas of Hyrule, Lon Lon Ranch seems the least affected by the end of the world. Not Luigi has been placed in charge of the ranch by Ganondorf, and Not Mario has been thrown out. Although he may be a power hungry maniac, Ganondorf isn’t stupid. It’s smarter to take over the ranch and use it for his ends rather than destroy it, right?



Malon is still around, looking considerably hotter than before.

I’ll say. Alright, you’ve got to be my wingman on this. I’m going in.

Wait, what?



Oooooh man, saving the world just makes me soooo tired! I am so tired right now!

First of all, that’s the oldest move in the book. Second of all, that only works in movie theaters, retard. You’re not even standing next to her!

Yeah, well…

And you’ve already got a girlfriend! Two of ‘em, really!

Fine, forget it. Let’s go.

Trivia Time: can you spot the Nintendo cameo in the last two pictures?



Well, I don’t think there’s anyone in the world who can groom eyebrows quite as well as you can. I guess that’s a talent.

For a small fee, Not Luigi allows Blondie to ride one of his horses for a full minute. What a guy!







Playing Epona’s Song causes a now fully grown Epona to ride over to us. After riding around and getting used to the mechanics of riding from Not Luigi, Blondie gets kicked out. After paying another small fee, talking to Not Luigi while riding Epona causes Not Luigi to challenge us to a race.

The Hylian Derby

Video Summary: A boastful Not Luigi thinks he can beat Blondie and Epona in a race? Hey, did he just start before me? I’m calling shenanigans on this one.



Now that Epona has been liberated from the confines of Lon Lon Ranch, Blondie hauls it to Kakariko Village per the suggestion of some androgynous ninja thing.



Kakariko has undergone some changes since we last left it. A large portion of Castle Town’s citizens have made it to Kakariko unscathed. The Scamp’s old house has been bought out by the shop owner from Castle Town, and the Potion Shop owner has bought the empty house just across from it.

The Carpenters finally finished their work and the Target Shooting owner moved into the new building. The entire town lives in the shadow of Death Mountain, which has grown somewhat more, uh, volatile since we last left it. To say the least. Although the town is largely intact (although there no longer are guards posted around the village) the town has a fairly foreboding atmosphere about it now that Ganondorf has ostensibly destroyed the world.



It also has…just whatever the hell this is.





It seems that, in the past, someone who looked like us played a song that messed up the windmill in Kakariko Village. The angry gentleman is kind enough to teach us the very song that has driven him to madness. True to his word, playing the song causes the windmill to start spinning wildly out of control.



In a bizarre moment of clarity, this NPC is able to recognize that hey, maybe we’re the same person as the kid who played the ocarina in the past (this is something we do later in the game as a child). None of the other NPCs in the game (outside of the ones that are important to the story) seem to understand that Young Blondie and Adult Blondie are the same person. No one except this NPC who has been driven mad. A sudden moment clarity after years of insanity caused by a traumatizing and paranormal event? Sounds awfully Lovecraftian, doesn’t it?



Speaking of paranormal events, Poes now freely roam the Kakariko Graveyard. Upon defeating them, we’re given the option to catch them in bottles. Remember the NPC I mentioned that buys mysterious things from us? Well, here you go. The Old Hag in the ruins of Castle Town will buy a regular Poe off of you for 30 rupees. There’s another, special kind of Poe that can be sold for more, but we’ll worry about that later.



The bean I planted in the graveyard has sprouted, and now in it’s place is a magical leaf that levitates.

Yeah, I don’t know either.

But I do know that it enables us to reach this area, where a Heart Piece awaits us inside of that box. This completes yet another Heart Container for Blondie. It’s certainly not our last, but we’re now at the halfway point of the game Hearts-wise.



Directly next to the leaf is a new grave with flowers in front of it. All of the other graves with flowers in front had things inside of them when we looted this place as a child. If that’s not a good sign, then I don’t know what is.



Welcome to the most annoying part of the game!

I think you’ve said that before.

Yeah, maybe. But this time I mean it. I really, really mean it.



Dampe?! Him too…

No time to get remorseful, Blondie! Follow him!



Oh, you’re kidding. Not only do I have to race him, but he throws fire at me too?

It gets worse.



FUCK

See?



The end! Finally!

Quite the opposite, Blondie. This is just the beginning.

It doesn’t matter what time you get during your first run through of the race with Dampe. As long as you can keep up with him (he shuts doors behind him so it is possible to get to a point where you can’t progress), you’ll get the all-important Hookshot as a reward.



This is our all-purpose replacement for the Boomerang. Not only does it stun enemies like the Boomerang, but it can also be used to pull yourself across gaps and drag items towards you. Later on we’ll get an upgrade for it, which I primarily use to slingshot around the roofs of the buildings in Kakariko Village while pretending that I’m Spider-Man.

Get used to using the Hookshot a lot, since there will rarely (if ever) be a time that Blondie doesn’t have it equipped as one of his three items. It’s a staple of Adult Blondie’s puzzles in Ocarina of Time.



Speaking of staple puzzles in Ocarina of Time, get used to seeing a lot of these blocks. Playing the Song of Time…



…causes them to disappear in a shaft of light. We’ll be seeing lots of these in upcoming dungeons.



With the blocks out of the way, Blondie finds himself back inside the Kakariko Windmill, albeit at a slightly higher level.



Oh snaps. Heart Piece.

So now we can go to the Forest Temple, right?

Nope. This is the part where I go insane. We’re going back to race Dampe again. If we beat him in under a minute, we get another Heart Piece.

Sounds easy!



This is not easy.

No kidding. The trick to beating Dampe in less than a minute is to roll as much as possible. You need to have the route memorized, dodge all of the randomly generated flames that Dampe throws at you, and roll constantly (thus reducing your maneuverability). It sucks. It really, really sucks.



It’s not impossible, however. We’re halfway towards getting another full Heart Container now.

*labored breathing* Now can we fucking go!? This is bullcrap! I had to do that twenty times!

Possibly more. I lost count. But yes, we can go…



…can go start The Trading Sequence! I’m planning on dedicating an entire update to this sequence, so we’ll only be doing the first portion of the sequence now. Each Zelda game post-Link’s Awakening has had a sidequest like this. It always involves a large number of NPCs and a large number of items to be traded from one person to another. Each quest starts with one act of kindness on Link’s part, and ends in the reward of a powerful item. Ocarina of Time’s trading sequence results in the acquisition of the single best item in the game, so you can bet your bottom dollar we’ll be finishing it as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, the earliest we can finish this particular sidequest is two dungeons from now.

Let’s get this puppy started. Anju, where you at?









Yet another NPC who doesn’t recognize us. Well, alright, so we need to hatch the egg and then find a deep sleeper. After using The Sun’s Song to make a day pass, the egg hatches. But where can we find a deep sleeper?



Is it just me or does this seem familiar?



If by ‘save Malon’ you mean ‘steal your best horse’, then yes.

Cojiro, eh? Your brother, eh? Trading sequence, eh? Right. Got it.

Well, that’s all we’re going to do for now. Don’t worry; we’ll be doing lots of trading very soon.

Great, I can’t wait. Now can we go save the day already?

Yes, of course.





Man, finally! Time to start to set things right! All this sidequesting was starting to drive me crazy.



I’ve got to go find that Sage and see i-



Well, this is different.

Indeed it is. It would seem that time has not been so kind to the Kokiri. With the Great Deku Tree dead and the world in the clutches of Ganondorf, Kokiri Village has been overrun by monsters. A quick search of the houses shows that all of the villagers are still alive, and still children. Yet…Blondie has grown. How can that be?



It seems the Mido continued to blame Blondie for the Great Deku Tree’s death while Saria defended him. Saria left the village and retreated to deep into the Sacred Forest Meadow. Out of guilt, Mido left to find her and neither has returned since.

Man, that’s heavy.

I know, right? But we don’t have time to think about this. Let’s get to the Forest Meadow.



Just inside the Lost Woods, we find Cojiro’s owner/Anju’s brother. But wait…this isn’t just any old NPC, this is the Carpenter Boss’s son! That makes Anju the boss’s daughter? Huh. Learn something new every day, I guess! Like I said before, I’m planning on doing an entire update on moving the Trading Sequence forward, so we’ll be leaving the Carpenter’s Son/Cojiro alone for now.



Deeper into the Lost Woods, we find Mido up to his usual douchebaggery. Blondie, you know what to do!



Leaf Attack!

A sudden moment of remorse? How convenient. You’re still a douche, Mido.

And an idiot since he couldn’t figure out that you’re the same person.

Right; that too.



Finally. Hopefully this place is still protected. It is one of the holiest sites in all of Koki-



Fucking a, man. This is just not my day.

Say hello to Ocarina of Time’s interpretation of a Moblin. It’s…considerably different from previous games. This is the only section in the entire game where Moblins make an appearance, despite being some of the most common enemies in previous Zelda titles.



Luckily, one Hookshot to the back will take these puppies out. Alternatively, you could just sneak around them when their back is turned, but what fun is that?



At the end of the Meadow, a Moblin does his best Terry Bogard impression by attempting to Power Wave Blondie to death. This move isn’t too hard to maneuver around, and Moblins apparently don’t know how to turn around, so Blondie is able to dispatch this enemy with little difficulty.

We’re now very near the Forest Temple. ...but we still need to talk to a friend before we can go in.

The Minuet of Forest

Video Summary: Sheik appears yet again, and teaches Blondie a new song for his Ocarina. Just who is that Sheik, anyway? Friend? Foe? Bitchin' harp player? All of the above?

Next Time on A Brief History of Time: The Forest Temple. Need I say more?

EAT IT! EAT IT! Or not; it was one hell of a missed opportunity to say the least.

Funny story. I did, actually. I just cut it from the update to save time. I'll do it again sometime.

I can see Link in those two pictures! Also, I think Malon's broach is a Mario face.

Bowser, actually.

My thought process here:

"What, that can't be. *scrolls up* Hey, there he is, right out in the open! How did I miss a cameo like tha- oh. Oh, fuck me."

In my defense, I haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately.

We have a winner!

Y'know, when you race Dampe, you can save yourself a few seconds by longhsotting across that last gap instead of running all the way up the path.
It just means you have to wait three dungeons to get the heart piece.

As a child, I always found it so strange how delightfully cheery the Minuet of Forest is in comparison to the Forest Temple. It's like "Hooray! Playing my minuet, warping to the dungeon, whee let's hookshot up... Oh. You're really dark and dank and spooky. Let's turn the Nintendo 64 off."

New episode will be up sometime tomorrow. It's a bit late since I've been sick and didn't want to record the commentary for the videos while sick...but I didn't want to put it off anymore, so I went ahead and did it anyway. That's why my voice sounds so gravel-y.

You've made my day, you know that?

(You may notice that Blondie/Navi are not present in this week’s update. That’s because I actually have things to talk about this time and I don’t need them to artificially create humor. The downside is that, since I actually have things to talk about, this episode is fairly dry. Do you prefer the dry/retrospective approach, or the slapstick-esque humor approach? Please let me know. And a word for those of you who like the slapstick-esque approach: while this dungeon may be Blondie/Navi-less, you’ll be pleased to know that a certain aquatically themed dungeon will be (almost) entirely told from their perspective. I will be doing this for a very specific reason, but you’ll just have to wait to find out more.)

It seems to me that I have been blessed. My original plan was to have this update ready earlier in the week, but as you can plainly see, that did not come to fruition. I have been struck down with a mild cold. This has already affected me negatively in some ways. Tonight I’ll be missing a co-worker’s 21st birthday party. Last night I had to cut my weekly Final Fantasy XI sojourn short due to medicine-induced drowsiness. Tomorrow, I will presumably still be slightly sick as I trudge my way through the work day.

But for now, I am at a tremendous advantage. Whenever I get sick (which is fairly rare), I revert to a much simpler version of myself. My muscles always become extremely weak and I find myself unable to do much but sleep, read, play video games, and generally speaking feel icky. But in my weakened state, sometimes even video games become too much of a hassle. Playing an action or competitive-oriented game like Castlevania or Team Fortress 2 becomes a literal headache. RPGs don’t help either since I rarely ever have the energy to follow the story or micro-manage my equipment set-ups. I need to play some simpler, lighter fare when I get sick. Katamari Damacy is an old standby. Mario is another. And Zelda is yet another. Zelda’s blend of action, puzzle solving, and adventuring seems to be the perfect cure for when my body’s natural defenses fail me. Now, wrapped in blankets and sipping on an increasingly cooling cup of tea, I find myself in a perfect position to finish what I started earlier in the week: breaking down one of my favorite levels in any game ever.



After stepping under an ornately designed archway, we’re instantly greeted with a stone mansion encased inside the larger surroundings of the Temple. This is where the Forest Temple immediately begins to subvert our expectations. A mansion? Inside of a more traditional temple-like structure? Peculiar, to say the least.

The Temple is in an obvious state of disrepair. Long since abandoned, trees have sprouted in unusual places, vines and grass sprout up from underneath stone, and the overall appearance of the place is dilapidated. The mind cannot help but start asking questions. What is this Temple’s purpose? Who built it? Why did they abandon it?

Let’s also not forget the music, either. The song begins with a type of percussive instrument that bounces back and forth between both speakers. A low choir of mysterious voices hums ominously over them periodically. After a few repetitions of this pattern, a ghastly repeating wail begins to assault your eardrums. Eventually the wail starts repeating itself, until it eventually overpowers all of the music. The wail continues unabated for several dozen seconds. The music eventually begins to make its presence known once again and fight backs the wailing noise. The song begins again.

The importance of the music of the Forest Temple simply cannot be understated. The Forest Temple is all about subverting the player’s expectations by throwing them into a deeply mysterious and disturbing environment. The choir of voices set an ominous tone. It quickly becomes clear through the repetitious wails that there is something dark and sinister in this Temple. This presence is able to overpower the music itself and assault you, the player, directly. The Temple itself is just barely able to keep this presence placated. Add to this the disturbing imagery of a once magnificent structure in a state of disrepair, some fantastically sinister enemies, and no explanation as to what has caused any of this, and you have one of the most delightful dungeons in all of Zelda’s long and storied history.

Let’s get started, shall we?



As Blondie draws closer to the front door of the Temple, he is immediately assaulted by two Wolfos. They are just as easy to defeat now as they were seven years prior.



As I stated before, The Forest Temple is all about defying the expectations of just what a dungeon is. Before we even enter the dungeon proper, we need to solve a puzzle.



Well above the entrance of the Temple, Blondie spots a small chest and after making a dangerous leap…



…he finds our first (but certainly not last) Small Key! Our first three dungeons did not have a single locked door in them. Instead, Blondie was always blocked through organic means. A burnable spider-web or a bomb flower-able wall was about the only barrier that Blondie ran into in earlier dungeons. Not so anymore.

Key collecting is something that any Zelda veteran worth their salt knows much about. From now on, all dungeons will have locked doors that require us to find Small Keys in order to proceed. Each Key will open exactly one door. Often, if you can’t find a Key to open a locked door that means you missed something in a previous area. With Key in hand, Blondie is now ready to enter the haunted grounds of the Forest Temple.



A well-lit, if dilapidated, entryway spreads out in front of Blondie. Several lit torches and a strange elevator of some kind sit in the center of the structure.







Four garishly colored Poes appear and steal the flames from each torch. Each takes off in a different direction, and Blondie is left alone in a now-dark and fog filled entryway. Several paths are open to Blondie at this point. One path is blocked by a blue Song of Time box first seen in Dampe’s Grave. Another is blocked by a set of iron bars. A third option is inaccessible from our current location. Another two doors are open for Blondie to explore.

The sudden shift from Kid Blondie to Adult Blondie marks a decisive shift in dungeon design as well. Whereas the first three dungeons were fairly linear and often only left a few options as to where to go, the Forest Temple provides Blondie with a wide variety of options as well as several that will have to be revisited since we cannot currently access them. As the dungeon unfolds, Blondie will see a great deal of backtracking and altering the characteristics of one area by performing an action in another. This is a stark contrast to Kid Blondie’s dungeons, which take more of a traditional Zelda approach (i.e. a series of individual rooms with individual puzzles and little interaction between each area).

There are, of course, examples in previous Zeldas that did not do this and areas in Kid Blondie’s dungeons that did. Please keep in mind that I am speaking in generalities.



One of the paths open to Blondie finds two Stalfos guarding another Small Key. Stalfos are unique in that they are the first enemies we have encountered at this point that are truly dangerous. They attack in pairs, are aggressive, and deal substantial damage…if you let them. I disposed of the two in this room with little effort, but struggled a bit against the three I have to fight later in this dungeon. I’ll be discussing Stalfos more then.



Another door leads us to an overgrown courtyard. Vines and moss infest the area, which still manages to keep an alluring quality to it.

It also has gi-normous plant monsters.



Our next path lies upward, but let’s take a moment to consider what is in this screenshot. First, the sky. Note that it is bright and blue. Inside the Temple, everything is dark and foggy. Outside, the sun shines as clear as day. If it is not night that is causing such darkness, then what is?

Also, note the features of the courtyard’s walls. It looks awfully like a castle, wouldn’t you say? So this Temple is part mansion (the interior), part Greek or Roman Temple (the pillars/archways/outward appearance as seen in Forest Meadow), and part castle (certain interior areas, the courtyards). Who could have built an abomination such as this? Is this is simply a misstep by the art director, or a continued subversion of the player’s expectations? A technical mishap, or a twisted and corrupted structure deliberately designed to confuse and bewilder the player?

I think it’s obvious where I stand on this.



A small pathway leads into another courtyard, which has a Hookshot target on a balcony opposite where Blondie is standing. Get used to seeing these a lot as they only become more and more prevalent as the game marches on (the Water Temple alone has 12,000,000 Hookshot targets no joke). A switch on this balcony lowers the water level in a well that connects the two courtyards.





Yet another Small Key lies in the bottom of this well, as well as a path back into the first courtyard.



I don’t know why, but whenever I see these candles, I can’t help but think that Blondie got teleported into a Castlevania game.



The next area contains a block pushing puzzle that takes full advantage of the third dimension the N64 has provided. Blondie has to maneuver around and on top of this block, as well as another one on a different floor. If this game were in 2D, this would be considered a simple puzzle. But by pulling the camera out from above Blondie and putting it behind him and making the corridors extremely tight, it creates a much more complex brain teaser.



This door leads to one of the greatest areas in the entire dungeon, so I why don’t I let myself do the talking for me?



Click title to view video!

Video Summary: After making his way through a bizarre series of rooms, Blondie finds himself face to face with a small army of Stalfos. Can he defeat the (presumed) former tenants of this Temple and make it out alive?



With the unfortunately named Fairy’s Bow in hand, it’s now time for Blondie to backtrack a bit. In the abandoned hallways we first walked through on our way to get our bow, the previously empty paintings now have become possessed by a red Poe. If Blondie gets to close to a painting, the Poe will switch to another painting. After positioning himself carefully and shooting each painting (a task made more difficult by my Dual Shock’s sensitivity interfering with the emulator), Blondie forces the red Poe to appear in the bottom of the hall.



Joelle is no different from any Poe we’ve faced to this point. Attack, she’ll turn invisible and swing her torch at you, guard her feeble effort, and then repeat when she turns visible again after attacking.





After defeating Joelle and entering a connecting pathway, Blondie encounters a similar painting trick/blue Poe. This one is named Beth.

Bonus Trivia Question: The four Poe sisters are named after four sisters in a famous piece of literature. What extremely boring novel are these four sisters named after?



Now that we have the Bow and have defeated the first two sisters, we need to head back to the beginning and then re-enter the twisted hallway. A quick way to do this is to proceed a bit further into the dungeon and let a Wallmaster grab Blondie.



Now that we’ve defeated the first two sisters, you’ll see their respectively colored torches have been relit.





Now that we have the Bow, we can shoot eye switches like this one. Shooting it “straightens” the twisted hallway.

It also rotates the room that is attached to the end of the hallway, and gives us access to…



…our first Boss Key! All of the –Temple dungeons have special keys in them that unlock the door to the dungeon’s boss. Each one comes in a fancy blue and gold treasure chest. This particular chest was previously on the wall of this room when first visited, but since we rotated it by “straightening” the attached hallway, we can now access it.



Several fairly unremarkable rooms later, Blondie finds himself in another Poe room. Shooting the painting in this room drops a simple block puzzle that needs to be solved within a certain time limit (which changes if you happen to fail).



Finishing the puzzle spawns the third Poe sister, Amy. After defeating her, Blondie ends up on a balcony over looking the entryway.



The green torch is now lit, and in a bizarre twist, the last Poe is waiting for us. She sits sobbing in the middle of the room, crying over the “death” of her sisters.

This is perhaps the most expectation-defying moment of this entire dungeon. We’re the hero. We’ve come here on a noble quest to save the kingdom of Hyrule. Yet instead, we’ve invaded the home of four sisters and brutally murdered three of them. The four sisters were just trying to protect their home and their prized possessions (the flames that kept them bound to this world). Are we doing them a favor? Are we setting them free from their torment? Or are we a brutal murderer who has barged into someone else’s home and slain its inhabitants?

It’s a question that’s easy not to ask; especially in a game like Zelda. After all, Blondie gets assaulted by ghosts and helicopter pineapples and skeletons forty times a day. But here, in the depths of a dark and mysterious temple, we encounter a monster with just as much humanity as us. She is weeping over her sister’s demise and her helplessness to stop it. When Blondie jumps down from the balcony, she lets out a cry of ghastly rage and confronts us.

Are we really the hero here?







The last sister, Meg, begins by splitting herself into four. Only one is the “real” Meg. Fortunately, Meg has a tell. As you can see in the middle picture, as soon as the four Megs appear, one will spin in a circle (note that the one at the bottom of the picture is turned backwards). This is the one you must target. A few arrows and/or Hookshots will take her down easily.





The last torch is lit, and an elevator comes up. After riding it down to a lower level and pressing a few switches, Blondie marches towards a fantastic confrontation in this dungeon’s boss room.





Click title to view video!

Video Summary: After conquering the mysteries of the Forest Temple, Blondie finds himself in a mysterious art gallery. Seemingly out of nowhere, Ganondorf appears and attacks! But is it really Ganondorf? All is not as it seems! After the fight, an old friend appears to help Blondie in his desperate struggle against the forces of evil.

Further adding to the weirdness of their reunion, Saria says goodbye in the most awkward way possible. I’m not sure if this is a translation error or what, but Saria really loses any sense of personality she once had in this scene.



Blondie finds himself outside the remains of the Great Deku Tree. But, what’s this?



Click title to view video!

Video Summary: The Great Deku Tree has been reborn in the form of the oddly-mannered Deku Tree Sprout. Time to learn your backstory, Blondie.

Next Time on A Brief History of Time: Move the story forward? No way! It's time to sequence break and head to one of my favorite areas! I'll also unveil the winner of the The Official Reader Contest! It's still not too late to enter, though! Get your entry in before midnight tonight!

I've never read the book, but I remember back to the the TvTropes entry to say this is Little Women

I prefer this style. That's what an LP is for me; someone playing through a game I don't know much about and giving insights while keeping it fun.

I think you should stick with a mix of both informative and slap-stick. Use the informative style when it really needs it (i.e.: explaining dungeon/plot details), and for the more boring, less detailed parts (i.e.: running across Hyrule Field), use slapstick.

All in all, awesome update!

Re: Saria - I like to think that she's so overwhelmed by her new role that she's learnt what to say by rote. She's not going to cry. She's not going to cry in front of Blondie.

Yeah that part never bothered me. She's a sage, mang.

You seem to have glossed over the line where Saria states that she and Blondie just can't live in the same world anymore. Put this together with how all the Kokiri say she went off by herself to clear the evil out of the Forest Temple, and it's clear that she's already accepted her role as a Sage. Her final line is full of barely-reined sadness and remorse that, after Blondie's come back to her after seven long years, she can't even stand on the same plane of existence as him anymore. It's more or less a final farewell.

For more sadness, go and talk to Mido again.



Ghost guy is a man, baby. He's the same person as the guard who hangs out in that building in Kid Blondie's time, in fact. Go and talk to said guard at night for the evidence.



There's nothing actually stopping you from fulfilling the whole thing before you ever set foot in the Forest Temple. I always go for it immediately, because hey -- big sword.



When you save and quit inside the dungeon, you'll start again at the beginning of that dungeon, not the Temple of Time. So, you don't even need the warp songs for that.

Not only that; it's implied that the Lens of Truth is his other eye.

Well, you do have to do the Ice Cavern, and that's tough without the Bow. I usually do the trading quest up to the saw before the Forest Temple, trade the saw for the broken hilt before the Fire Temple, trade the hilt for the Prescription after the Fire Temple, then do the rest after the Ice Cavern.

Where is that? I have to say I'm skeptical, since you get the Lens in Kid Blondie's time, when the guy is still hangin' out, bein' a guard.

One of the old guys in Adult Kakariko (it's the same dude who's the astronomer in Majora's Mask) tells you a story about a man who could see the truth, and how he eventually lost one of his eyes down the well. And when you talk to the Ghost Salesman for the first time, he talks about how he "sees very well" or something to that effect. And he's only got one eye, and it's red -- just like the Lens. They don't out-and-out tell you, but it's not a huge leap.

It took me a while to put two and two together regarding the guard in Child Link's time, but I always assumed the Lens of Truth was the Ghost Salesman's other eye.

As for the time paradox, this is the same game that has a guy teach a song to you that you taught to him, so I'm not too worried about it.

Ug, I kind of hate the lens of truth in the same way that I kind of hate the x-ray scanner in Super Metroid. I end up stopping the game so I can scan just about everything looking for a secret...

Also, you get it from a well, which "According to the old man in Kakariko Village, the house of a man who could see the truth once stood on the location of the well." so I don't think that's the guard's eye.

The Forest Temple is awesome. One of the best levels in any Zelda game.

As for the Saria scene, I've always assumed that there were words shared that we weren't privy to. It's obvious that she's come to terms with something already.