Xenosaga: Was mi�riert

Part 2 of an update that starts on the previous page.



So, yes, our “battle party” is exclusively Shion, and Allen is tagging along.



There is an extremely convenient path from the Elsa Cave back to the city. This means that, had we navigated the city just the tiniest bit, we could have avoided that whole stupid mine. Mrgrgr.



There are actually a few neat treasures to find on this world map, but some are roped off at the moment, so we’ll look at them all simultaneously in the sidequest update.



Almost to the city, but there’s a little interlude to cover.



Oh, now you don’t want to interact with the past. Whatever.



It wasn’t until this very moment that I realized how conspicuous Allen must be wearing his Vector uniform all over the galaxy for three games.



Anyway, looks like Federation Forces attacked this U-TIC transport and killed everybody. I’d make some comment about war being hell, but I’m pretty sure our party has killed more random soldiers than the clap.



And, hey, Suou Uzuki is helping with the investigation. We’re a little over an hour into the past, and Shion has encountered practically everyone she knows.



The “subjects” are clearly Realians. Virgil isn’t the only Federation Trooper in favor of Realian genocide.



Suou… doesn’t seem quite as caring as his daughter.



Really, U-TIC? You guys just leave your departed friends/property hanging out on some road, and assume the cleanup crew is going to swing by later?



Shion is a JRPG heroine, so she knows it’s her job to loot some corpses. U-TIC ID get!



Dress-up!



Did Shion grab the glasses again to record valuable data, or just because it makes her look more science-y? Anyway, Allen, we’re just gonna indulge in some light espionage in an enemy base. Your services are no longer needed.



Allen isn’t going anywhere, and Shion confesses she suspected Suou must have had some connection to U-TIC. Shion suspected this because Doctus told her that yesterday. So, new goal, time to infiltrate U-TIC and investigate daddy.



Beyond the U-TIC van is the city proper. I appreciate that someone bothered to stick The Song of Nephilim “top” within range of Shion’s mom’s hospital, so that one flashback in XS1 continues to make sense. There is a surprising amount of attention to detail in this series.



Anyway, here’s where the “real” town starts.



We’ve only ever seen Old Miltia completely wrecked, so here it is happy and operating. Looks kind of like Fifth Jerusalem.



Just a little more of a U-TIC presence.



Hey, don’t worry about it. Just because we’ve fought countless U-TIC soldiers doesn’t mean we have to fight these U-TIC soldiers.



I like that the Federation apparently predominantly uses an “artificial” army. Realians are weak to The Song of Nephilim, so normal types like Virgil have to be deployed.



And Shion elaborates that the reason there’s somehow a ground war in the age of interstellar giant robots is that civilians and the Zohar are too valuable to destroy… probably not in that order.



We’ve got our first official town since back on Fifth Jerusalem. Like the capital city, we will not be able to return to this area during its peaceful phase, so enjoy it while you can. Incidentally, you get two passes at this city area, so if I miss anything in this update, don’t worry, I’m saving it for the next trip (and not just because I forgot).



Aw, it’s an ice cream truck. Ice cream is a purchasable healing item, and the only disadvantage it has compared to med kits is that it goes straight to your thighs.



Ah ha ha, what jolly good fun. We can press that shiny button on the side and close the shutters on the ice cream truck. If you want, you may leave the poor vendor trapped in his truck, but we’re not horrible people, so we’ll open it up again. I’m sure that’s the right thing to do.

There’s also a lottery vendor across the street, but using future knowledge to cheat on the lottery would be wrong.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Further insane XS1 references: you probably don’t recall at all “Linda”, a woman waiting around on the highway during the encephalon dive complaining about her boyfriend being late. Then she turned into a gnosis. It didn’t have an impact on a damn thing, but here’s Piquet, waiting in the wrong spot for a woman doomed to become a gnosis. Or maybe Linda got it wrong. Whatever, it’s tragic or something.



Speaking of tragedy, here’s a bridge overlooking the opening playground area of that same encephalon dive.



And Kiddy Shion is chilling on that swing set Nephilim once used. I like how these little details make the whole situation seem more… ominous.



It’s a town, so there are a number of NPCs milling about with their scripted opinions. U-TIC is treated as a bunch of thugs…



Or absolute heroes. Guess that’s how war goes.



There are also delightful references to Jin’s beastliness during the war. If you see a green AMWS, run away!



There’s a clue to a sidequest here. Just remember to check the trashcans.



Labyrinthos doesn’t look so bad when it isn’t exploding or dropping corpses.



Wow, that’s a really profound thing to say… Dike? Your name is Dike? Hahaha, loser.



They should build a wall!



Okay, here’s the first Federal Report. This is explained a little later, but some mysterious Federation Soldier that is totally not Jin hid reports all over the city, and it’s your job to collect them. This one is pretty much in plain sight if you turn down the right street, and the kids earlier were providing a hint to another one, but most of the rest will be discovered when Old Miltia is a little more… hectic. You need to find all eight to complete a sidequest, so we’ll see if I remember to cap ‘em as I find ‘em.



City ends, big circular building begins.



This is the Acute Neurosis Treatment Facility. You will recall from the previous shot that it wraps around Labyrinthos proper, which should tell you everything you need to know about who’s running the place.



I guess identity theft isn’t really a thing in 4,000 years.



Nobody ever questions the woman no one has ever seen before that is blowing up cars in the parking lot.



I’m sure that won’t be relevant at all!



I guess there is a little bit of questioning. Luckily, Allen knows how to sound as nonthreatening as possible.



I know those names!



Here we are, inside the ANTF aka Shion’s mom’s “hospital”.



“You are not allowed to use traps here, even though this place will so obviously be a dungeon soon.”



I’d point out that Allen saw like one hallway of that hospital during the flashback, and how the heck did he correctly identify this building? On the other hand, I have no doubt that Allen has an eidetic memory when it comes to a certain female engineer.



I guess we’re referencing A Missing Year here, though Shion may have gotten the deets from Doctus at some point.



Wow! You figured out the building that is literally tied to Labyrinthos is tied to Labyrinthos. What’s your next case, Sherlock?



Feel free to explore the first floor and maybe blow some stuff up even though you were expressly told not to and are maybe destroying all of space and time.



This has nothing to do with anything, but I found this weird tile that shoves Shion aside. No idea what’s going on there.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Here is a stairwell. We’re not allowed to use it. Yet.



May as well use the elevator.



Shion oddly does not go immediately to the floor holding her mom. But I do!



But all we can access is a hallway and some Realians complaining about other Realians getting sent to Proto Merkabah and maybe filling in that plot blank on those weird readouts in the final XS1 dungeon.



Floors 2 and 3 are also restricted. Lame. Guess that leaves the plot and Floor 4.



Put all the experiments on the fifth floor, but management is on Floor 4? This isn’t a real building!



Random NPC Cecilia suggests that U-TIC and Labyrinthos are taking advantage of the number of Immigrant Fleet “test subjects” on this planet (and specifically in this city). I guess Cecilia is the only woman on the planet paying any attention.



A flashing console will reveal a password for a treasure on the world map. Yay, treasure!



Dr. Mizrahi’s office contains our next round of dialogue boxes.



“Hey! I hang out with your daughter all the time! No, not the dead one. Wait, is she dead yet?”



I can’t help but wonder if they set up Shion’s Realian mechanical skills (and not just empathy) in XS1 for this exact scene. Because Shion actually could do the job of a U-TIC Realian engineer, she immediately falls into line for Dr. Mizrahi.



And Shion compensates for any irregularities by claiming it’s her first day. Next she’s going to blame Tibor.



So the “subjects” here are being tested for their compatibility with Vessels of Anima.



Guess this explains what this building is being used for, and where we can get new (old) Vessels of Anima. Score!



Oh, silly Allen. Didn’t you know that our giant robots are powered by the very thing that lets man communicate with God? The manual was in the glove box!



So… Dr. Mizrahi is Sinestro? Well, that’s a twist.



And a complete lack of twist: Shion’s mom is a test subject. So Shion figured out that this was some kind of testing facility, and that her mom was specifically here, but she didn’t realize her mother might be a test subject? That’s… peculiar.



God, I’m glad he said his assistant’s name. I hate being at a new job, and your boss is like, “Get the file clerk”, and you don’t who that is, but you’re afraid to ask, and you wind up talking to the receptionist, and then you’re afraid that it looks like you’re not doing anything, and then… Wait… Kevin?



Mizrahi drone Macy notes that Kevin is a little on the weird side. Does he parade around in a flowing, red cloak? Constantly talk about building his own robot woman?



Elsewhere on the floor is a treasure chest under glass that is completely inaccessible. Gee, wonder what that means.



To maybe ease the “retcon” and Shion’s faulty memory, Allen comments that he’s never heard of Kevin’s previous employment under the head mad scientist of the galaxy. You really think that would warrant a mention.



They were this close to married, but the fact that they were both on the same planet at the same city in the same building with the same friends at the exact same time never came up.

“What did you do before you worked at Vector?”
“Eh, I dunno. Stuff.”



“You could have seen me naked! You have to wait another decade for that!”



I guess this is about where Shion gets it. Young Kevin just assumes she’s some doofy broad.



Young Kevin is kind of a jerk, but he seems fairly obedient towards Mizrahi. This will turn out to be a complete farce shortly.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Again, we have to throw a few bones to “why the hell didn’t Shion recognize him the first time”.



At this point, we’re about ten minutes from finding out Shion’s dog was involved with U-TIC. … I take that back, Shion is obviously a cat person. “Shion, I need to be cleaned, meow.”



Speaking of temperamental creatures…



Check it out! Young Kevin is already working on KOS-MOS!



This is exactly why I keep a USB drive on my keychain.



Shion recognizes that they might not be able to kidnap Young Kevin to repair KOS-MOS (though I’m sure she was thinking about it), but downloading KOS-MOS’s creator’s data is a fine consolation prize. This trip to break the timeline has been surprisingly fruitful!



Allen is forced to run interference.



Shion finishes up just as Kevin is reaching his Allen tolerance point. Kevin will remember that.



You guys really need to come up with codenames. How about “Red” and “Soiled Shorts”?



“Welp, we found the Vessels of Anima and a way to repair KOS-MOS, but I’ve still got daddy issues.”



Mizrahi thanks Shion for going next door and bugging his assistant, and the next job is to go upstairs and deliver some data. Science is bureaucracy!



Fifth floor. It still looks like we can’t go anywhere.



But if you talk to the door instead of the guard, you’ll trigger a scene that will move things along. Not very intuitive.



But it’s here because…



Squint a little bit, and you’ll see a Vessel of Anima.



Well, we knew they were in the building, now we know exactly where. Want to guess our next dungeon?



There’s an elevator going down to that secret basement here. Given what you just saw, you might think this is the way to those Vessels of Anima, but that would be too convenient. We will see this elevator again much later, and just in time for Fun Times�, too.



Random room, random psycho that claims to be protecting the area from Shion’s usual destructive tendencies. Glad someone is doing it.



Hiding in the corner of that same room is a woman that will reward you if you find all the Federal Reports scattered about Miltia. For right now, just remember she’s here. Find all eight later, and she’ll fork over a door decoder.



Ya know, you’re rewarded for finding all the Update Files, but they’re always “hidden” in plain sight. I can’t figure out if that’s a bad thing.




Search the right console, and you’ll get the full download on Tethlla Magus, Mai’s father. Apparently U-TIC faked his death at the mines, dragged him back here, and then actually (and accidentally) killed him. Note that since the whole Zohar/Anima connection thing is genetic, this means Mai is probably anima-sympathetic, too.

… This would be relevant if the story was interested in doing anything with Mai at all.



After checking this console, if you revisit Mai at any point, she’ll thank you for the information and hand over a door decoder. And that’s the full extent of Mai’s impact on Xenosaga.



Props to Xenosaga and its rigid policy on visual continuity. This hallway always makes me anxious.



Here we are, a completely bright and sunny hospital room where nothing will ever go wrong. That window has such a lovely view of The Song of Nephilim.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Subtle, Shion. Subtle.



Shion is… not just talking to herself here.



Shion! Timeline!



Shion is pissed off, and Suou completely ignores this woman that looks a lot like his wife and daughter that is mysteriously freaking out. I know most people wouldn’t assume time travel first thing, but I’d at least believe this is a long lost sister or something.



Suou justifies whatever is happening here with “she’s fine.” Shion, don’t you understand being fine?



“Young lady, go to your room!”



Had to go through like six security checkpoints in this building, but Kiddy Shion is cool to wander around wherever.



“Wow, Chief, you were adorable as a kid.”
“Allen, shut up.”



Shion, cantankerous U-TIC employee that Suou just met, volunteers to take lil’ Shion home. Eh, whatever gets her out of his hair. … Either “her”.



Shion does what she does best: lie to herself.



“I just happen to know this. You’re eight, don’t ask questions.”



Kiddy Shion wants to go back and see Virgil and Feb at the church, though.



No problem! Shion lives to indulge her younger self (and no one modeled the Uzuki residence).



On the way back through the lobby, Shion decides to blow up a chandelier for no damn reason.



Oh, wow, who would have guessed? Kiddy Shion is the little girl that waters the flowers in front of the facility.



I wonder if Kiddy Shion always wearing a white dress is a sign that Suou is a lousy father. Her chief activity seems to be playing in dirt, so… stain resistant future clothes?



There’s probably some deliberate parallel here with Feb giving Shion seeds to plant, and Shion later helping Luty with seeds during a couple of sidequests, but Luty doesn’t show up in this game, so whatever.



Have I mentioned before that, while I am currently single, one of my greatest fears is a lover somehow encountering my teenage self? I was such an asshole!



This scene is kind of incidentally important. If you haven’t noticed yet, Shion has Kevin blinders: she basically transforms into a mewling kitten every time he shows up in flashbacks or even gets mentioned in the present. Not that I blame her, mind you, I’m all about romanticizing dead (kinda) loved ones. Here, even if it’s just a jerkass teenage Kevin, Shion is taking her first steps to acknowledging that Kevin is this jerkass just as much as he’s eventually the mature, genocidal adult she fell in love with. Also, don’t diss gardening around Shion.



But we see that same parallel we saw with adult Shion and Kevin in their engagement flashback. Kevin naturally believes in war and fighting robots, Shion believes in planting gardens and loving every non-Allen creature in the galaxy.



Though Shion doesn’t quite get it yet.



Scene over, moving along.



And just to make things a little easier, Kiddy Shion reveals a shortcut behind the ice cream vendor for accessing the church. Good. Didn’t want to go through that mine again. This isn’t The After Years.



Quick walk through the woods…

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Ah, looks like Shion wasn’t the only Uzuki with wanderlust. Then again, Jin left to check on an experimental surgery patient, and Shion just wanted to yell at her dad.



Virgil puts the patient in patient.



Jin, who has been a professional spy off and on for years, is a surprisingly terrible liar. I’m pretty sure this is the truth!



THE WORLD MUST NEVER KNOW THERE ARE TWO WOMEN NAMED SHION ON THIS PLANET.



D’aww.



Virgil objects to cute at first, but eventually accepts. Ya big softie.



Virgil’s entire character arc is plainly stated… now.



When he was bleeding out on the ground, sniffing Realians on the Woglinde, or fifteen years ago that is right now?



And Feb is doing fine, too! She’s perfectly healthy… with such plentiful organs!



Virgil rather starkly attempts to repel Feb’s kindness with “ya know, I kill Realians, right?” Feb takes it in stride.



Virgil is suicidal at the prospect of all this compassion. If Kiddie Shion fires up an episode of My Little Gnosis, he’s going to keel over right here.



Does Virgil even have a “content” face portrait?



Feb wants everyone to live in peace. Good for her! She also makes reference to Cecily and Cathe, the two most doomed Realians on a planet full of ‘em.



There’s something important here that we’ll cover in a minute.



Shion tries to give Feb hope for the future. Ya know, Shion is all about breaking time and space for some parental abuse, but she’s tight lipped about maybe giving Feb a hand with her… everything.



Alright, here’s the thing: I feel like this is one of the most subtly religious things in gaming. Like, okay, this is a JRPG, and, nine times out of ten, that means you’re going to be slaying “god” by the end of the game. It’s a pretty common trope, and its corollary is that if there’s a religion in a JRPG, odds are it’s completely terrible and trying to kill everybody.

You may recall that we’ve already had Space Pope and Ormus/The Immigrant Fleet literally trying to kill the universe with something that looked a lot like Catholicism. And, as it continues, Margulis is a “true believer”, and apparently in the same(ish) boat as Pope Jackhole. That said, as we move forward, we’ll get the other side of religion with chaos, a devout Christian that is only ever trying to help the universe, and Shion, who is an unending fountain of empathy when she’s not having a bad day. And, while it’s still kind of a nebulous “JRPG vaguely Western religion” at the moment, there will be no question that this is and has been Christianity by the time Jesus friggen Christ shows up. That kind of clinches it.

But here we have Feb. Feb, when she’s not participating in horrendous experiments, appears to be the only person maintaining this derelict church. Feb cares for the sick, even if they are enemies. Feb prays at the altar. Feb hopes for a better world where everyone can live in peace. Feb shares her faith with local children. In short, Feb is the model Christian, and, as I joked before, practically a nun.

And ya don’t program an experimental Realian to be a nun.

So I keep coming back to the fact that Feb, an artificial biological life form preprogrammed for one particular purpose, is religious. She may have been programmed for empathy, or to be helpful, but that good ol’ fashioned religion seems like a lot of unnecessary code. Which means that Feb came to religion on her own (and it seems like at least one of her handlers isn’t much of a believer), which means that, independent of the God delusion that is theoretically part of human DNA, she decided, “Yes, this God thing seems legit. Let us pray.”

I’m neither praising nor bemoaning this decision, but it seems unnaturally (for a JRPG) religion-positive that the most overtly “good Christian” in this franchise is effectively an AI. One way or another, that was a premeditated story beat from somewhere.

Either that, or Mizrahi was just completely insane. There is evidence for that…

But in the meanwhile, just keep this in mind for later when I inevitably write the post “And I’m his friend Jesus: Xenosaga and Religion”.

Now back to mocking Xenosaga for believing in anything. So, what’re we praying about?











Alright, before Jin and Shion have a sadgasm, it’s time to change the scene.



Hey! I know this place! This is the Proto Omega room where the party first met Space Pope during XS2. Guess we’re deep in Labyrinthos.



And an unscarred Margulis is chatting with an up-and-walking Sellers. And, hey, fun fact, it was Kevin that decided to preemptively frame Mizrahi for the fall of Old Miltia. Welp, guess that answers that question (“Is Kevin a dick?”).



Cecily and Cathe are a little easier to stomach from a distance, but this is still a pair of dudes casually chatting over mutilated children.



You know that whole “End of Miltia” thing that is going to lead to the deaths of billions? Well, these guys know it’s coming, and they’re just making sure their own dudes make it off the planet alive. If you want to feel better about the situation, recall that they won’t make it off with their precious Zohar or Proto Omega, even though it’s clearly in a position that they should be able to hang onto.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Sellers reveals that Mizrahi maybe knows what’s coming, and is staying tight lipped on anything truly important. It’s cool, I wouldn’t trust Sellers, either.



Hey, guess what’s actually going to happen!



And that’s the chapter, folks. Aw, Feb, don’t look so sad.



Another chapter that lasted just about an hour down. You’ll note that there was a complete lack of combat this entire update, and, even if you wanted to explore old dungeons, your entire party was Shion, so I don’t think that would end well. That said, this chapter isn’t terrible, as it lets you explore Old, Doomed Miltia, and there’s always that kind of macabre joy in exploring a town on the cusp of destruction. Or maybe I’m a psychopath. Regardless, this chapter was almost entirely just laying pipe for what comes next, so let’s get ready to crumble!

Next time on Xenosaga: Retcontinue?

OK, finally caught up.
I played part of XS1, but never got through the series. I've been enjoying the LP immensely.

1. There's more than one Yeshua in the Gospel. So chaos could be one of the other ones. Maybe he's Barabbas.

2. Why only 12 ES? Between Genesis, Numbers, and Revelations there's 15 possible names they could've used. And they used Dinah. So, who gets left out?
Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Dan, Naphtali, Gad, Asher,Issachar, Zebulun, Dinah, Joseph, Benjamin, Ephraim, Manasseh.
I'm guessing Ephraim, Manasseh, and either Judah or Benjamin.

3. Shion remembers interacting with Kevin in her dream as a kid, and she apparently never asked his name.
Further, when they were dating, Kevin never mentioned, "hey I used to see you running around when I worked with your dad. We saved a Federation soldier once with Realian parts." That's a conversation that should've come up.

I think some Time Travel Shenanigans are coming up soon. I know I mentioned it to GoggleBob at some point earlier, but I dunno. It's good stuff, though, and one of my favorite parts of this series.

The best answer is probably that it's intended sort of like 12 apostles but just naming them straight as apostles wasn't very interesting nor did it really give a mystic feeling ("ES JOHN")[e: yes this is ignoring dan but i feel like i'm on to something]. Just an assumption. Very direct relations to the bible in this and xenogears are kind of just done as flavor to enhance the thematic relations.

My current working hypothesis is superficial research. They opened up to Genesis 29 & 30, read the 12 children's names there, and didn't go any further.
It would explain why they used Dinah, Dan, and Levi.

Whether it's important to anything, recall that they "already used" the twelve apostles for the names of the Zohar Emulators (with the main Zohar named "Marienkind")

I don't remember if you pointed this out, but Marienkind, child of Mary, Jesus, blah blah blah

hm, well i mostly just remember leaving the game with the inclination that there was some relation between zohar count and apostles so maybe that's actually what it comes from primarily

Previously on Xenosaga: I don’t know, it’s all starting to blend together. Shion did something reckless and potentially dangerous because of issues with some men in her life, but it worked out alright. Allen was insulted. I’m pretty sure there were some bad guys somewhere in there talking about nebulous, evil plans, too.



Oh, right, it’s the past, and Feb and Virgil are both alive. Virgil less so.



Note that Virgil doesn’t know (Kiddy) Shion’s name. A long, long time ago, someone stumbled onto Gogglebob.com with the search “why doesn’t Virgil recognize Shion”, obviously referring to their Woglinde encounter fifteen or so years later (than this scene). Here’s a fun question: do you remember every eight year old you’ve ever met? And there is evidence Virgil has face blindness…



This is one of those “prequel problems” you see a lot. It was established that Feb was literally the last thing on Virgil’s mind when he died, so we know they had a significant (at least for Virgil) relationship. But when it comes time to actually see that relationship, it has to all be established in a time frame that will still hold the audience’s interest (you’ll note that both characters have the handicap of not actually being in the main party, either). So, like Romeo and Juliet, theirs is a love that is lasting and eternal and based on like two days of knowing each other.



I guess the explanation is that Virgil never knew true kindness before or after Feb. D’aww.



“Well, I am a professional killer.”



“To a soldier, orders are absolute.” Gawrsh, where have I heard that before?



This scene ends with Virgil plopping himself down like a disgruntled teenager, but then he admits that Febronia is a pretty good chef. It should digest well in his stomach. That thing was Feb’s just yesterday.



And across town, we’ve got… Oh son of bitch.



Yep, it’s not enough that Young Kevin and Kiddy Shion were dimly aware of each other at Labyrinthos, they also have to have had a plot significant conversation.



Same ol’ dichotomy: Shion believes in life, Kevin… not so much.



Kevin asks why Shion didn’t just take the easy path.



But you gotta please your mom/loved ones.



The mere suggestion that Dr. Uzuki wouldn’t care about Shion’s little project causes her to… seem a little more familiar.



Yes, Kevin, please mansplain to a child why flowers are stupid.



Love of Shion’s life, everybody.



Well, everybody that doesn’t have allergies.



Eh, I’m starting to understand how this relationship worked.



Kiddy Shion has had enough. Kevin! Time to get to work!



“You’re not my mom! Yet!”



“Sitting is something!”



Just a reminder that Bunnie is an ubiquitous children’s mascot in the Xenosaga universe. Shion doesn’t mysteriously have a watering can that matches her future PDA mascot. Maybe this is a sign that there’s always going to be a part of Shion that’s childish. Or she’s just a giant nerd.



Kevin is ill-equipped to repel the assault of a small child.



*Whip cracking*



So even Young Kevin eventually relents to Kiddy Shion’s demands. Remember that for ten hours from now.



Daddy’s here! Spoilers, we’ll find out that Suou is well aware that half the staff at this place are murderous sociopaths, Kevin included. I’m assuming that this is another sign that Suou isn’t the best parent.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

“Gotta go see Mom, you’re on gardening duty.”



Kevin Winnicot: bossed around by a second grader.



Meet the adult boss, same as the kiddy boss. Hey, scientists, rebuild my robot!



I’m glad that Professor’s upgrade to “real” character didn’t diminish his antics.



Shion “finished” the KOS-MOS project without Kevin. The original KOS-MOS prototype was destroyed after she killed Kevin, so Shion was definitely responsible for KOS-MOS V1. But I guess she needs Professor to rebuild the modified V3? Is… is Shion just lazy?



Allen is suspicious of this plan, and very afraid that KOS-MOS is going to be turned into the KOS-TANK or something. Allen is an idiot.



But Professor is on the case! Maybe not for altruistic reasons…



Keep this in mind when you see KOS-MOS’s new “outfit”.



Professor and Assistant Scott need time to work, so… No… I don’t have to…



Allen is the lucky one.



Yes, the store! Let’s go to the store!



Allen x Assistant Scott shippers rejoice.



The shop technically updated last update, but you didn’t have the full party available, so now let’s really shop. There’s a good reason the game prompts this, incidentally.



I can’t remember if I checked out the armor last update, so maybe this is new? I don’t know.



Ugh, I suppose to progress the plot, we have to… Argh…



At least it’s… jumpy?



It’s HaKox!? everybody! Rejoice at the stupid minigame du jour.



Credit where it’s due: HaKox!? does its best to look like a “real” game that might actually exist in a few millennia. If there are any time travelers reading this, please let me know if they got anything right.



As you can see, there are six worlds of HaKox!?, and they each offer a different prize. Worlds are unlocked as the plot moves forward. This isn’t because you need to know any plot to play the game or something, but if you unlocked Junior’s ultimate weapon way ahead of the difficulty curve, it might make Hakox!? actually worthwhile, and we can’t have that.



So here’s the game: you watch your chosen character automatically walk from the start point to the exit square. Wow! Doesn’t that sound fun?!



As you can guess, the paths get more complex as the levels proceed. In some (pretty much all) stages, your digital avatar may wander off the path and fall to his/her doom.



Here’s where some interactivity comes in to play: some blocks match buttons on your controller (like Circle here), and tapping or holding that button will move those blocks. The challenge is moving those blocks into position at proper times to assist your walkers.



Some stages spawn multiple characters, ala Lemmings. In this board, for instance, you must properly move the top block into place to make sure… Argh, you can figure it out.



I’m already done.

Look, HaKox!? isn’t the worst thing in the world, it’s just kind of boring. It’s the kind of game that might actually succeed on a cell phone when you’re waiting in line for the Weird Al concert, but to play it “instead” of Xenosaga Episode 3 seems crazy. XS3, unlike its ancestors, has very good pacing/plotting for inspiring the player to move forward and “see what happens next”, and rarely presents a situation where you might want to take a break (“I have to do this stupid forest dungeon again, XS2?”). Couple this with XS3’s nonexistent post game, and there really isn’t ever a good time to play HaKox!?. There’s a significant push to get to that final boss, and then after he’s in the ground… why bother with this nonsense?

So, screw it. I’m not 100%’ing XS3, I’m playing it to see what the franchise has to offer, and I completely understand everything HaKox!? is inside of ten minutes. It’s a distraction, the end.

For the record, you may eventually win at least one red door decoder, Ziggy’s swimsuit, and the previously mentioned Junior’s ultimate weapon from playing HaKox!?. I went back and checked my final save file from my original game of XS3, and found that I didn’t bother with those optional items then, either. So at least I’m consistent.

And, yes, the best part of this whole stupid waste of a game is choosing Ziggy, and listening to him apologize as he falls off the board and into the abyss. He’s so polite.



The explanation for everyone you know being a playable character in HaKox!? is that Professor and Assistant Scott modded this arcade cabinet. Also: Junior is an idiot.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Shion admits that the game has calmed her down (for some reason... maybe she just likes seeing extra versions of herself?), and apologizes for being kind of a jerk up to this point. HaKox!? brings people together!



So Shion is going to take yet another “rest”. Girl has the stamina of a snorlax.



Yay! Time for KOS-MOS to come back to us!



Aw, no KOS-MOS.



So there’s a part missing or…?



. . .



Allen is the sad trombone of people.



Professor declares that Shion is needed. Not you, Allen.



I choose to believe that “Kevin’s notes” were basically a series of Ikea-esque diagrams, and Professor has little use for such things.



But it looks like a special guest is coming to play…



Shooooooower time!




See? Now you know how it feels to be an omniscient ghost girl.



“But I alone, may have a chance to change everything.”

Just gonna write off the whole rest of the party, eh?



Shion wonders what KOS-MOS would have to say about the situation. I think she’s confusing KOS-MOS for Spock again.



She literally showers with that necklace on. Is that normal? I don’t know from jewelry.



Please welcome special guest face, Kairi of Kingdom Hearts.



Allen is the exact kind of person that works with someone else for years and still introduces himself as, “It’s me, Allen.”



Do you put your clothes on to talk to your dog? Neither does Shion.



KOS-work is just what the doctor ordered.



There’s an explosion! Somewhere! It’s… very hard to capture an off-screen explosion in a screenshot LP.



Ah ha ha, hijinks.



Man, she gets dressed fast. Especially considering I have no idea how that outfit works. It’s like shorts over some kind of swimsuit with an open belly? And a fuzzy crop top? I’m not future style savvy.



I suppose we can save the fashion conversation for later.



Professor and Assistant Scott are blasted out of KOS-MOS’s repair bay. Hey, Black Testament? I’m pretty sure you could have beaten these guys with a leaf blower.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

This is only here so we can see Assistant Scott’s awesome custom jacket. There’s some clothing I can understand!



Black Testament isn’t into masks. Everyone that would recognize him is dead… mostly.



Get ‘em, pa!



chaos helps the wounded, and the rest of the crew lays down some suppressing fire.



And… it’s not doing any good.



Captain Matthews advocates doing absolutely nothing while Black Testament walks out with KOS-MOS and her space coffin.



But look who is here to help.



Lies!



Gee, I don’t know, maybe something to do with KOS-MOS?



… I feel like I have to remind everyone this guy is also known as Voyager… Voyager doesn’t answer his old buddy with anything but energy blasts.



Which Jin repels, because I guess he hasn’t done anything recently.



And Ziggy goes for the ol’ s-CRY-ed flying punch.



It’s not very effective…



“If we need healing ethers, we’ll call you!”



Hey, isn’t this the first that someone from the present has joined our party in the past? Hm.



Shion has an immediate reaction to the whole “kidnapping my robo daughter” thing. She knocks over Professor and Assistant Scott to…



Dammit! Ziggy just tried that! Does jumping enhance attacks that much?



Well, guess not. Force choke time.



“We apparently have absolutely nothing that can stop you, but please listen to us!”



… I just realized that KOS-MOS might be sleeping in a future pokéball.



And some kind of shiny purpleness happens.



What could that mean?



This is badass (KOS-MOS waking up just to save Shion), and a fine callback to KOS-MOS’s initial XS1 activation.



She always comes out hand first.



And she “woke up” in XS2 to save Shion from Black Testament (and his ES Dan), though she only used her bed as a motorcycle that time, and not an awesome projectile weapon.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Voyager is still pretty good at blocking.



But KOS-MOS is using giant pipes as nunchucks and… did I mention that the entire budget of this game went to KOS-MOS fights?



“Yet I bet in combat she’ll be exactly the same for some reason!”



KOS-MOS V4 is 100% and ready to go. Want to have a boss fight?



Swanky posing, everyone.



I think this party is pre-chosen. It’s appropriate, though.



Voyager will helpfully let you know who he is going to attack next. Apparently he is targeting party members with low HP, and that happens to be KOS-MOS, somehow.



In one of the greatest injustices in history, Ziggy is not allowed to use the choke attack on his mortal enemy. Stupid cloak.



So here’s Voyager. He’s weak to fire, so pulling MOMO out to cast some fire ethers would likely be a good idea. Note that he’s considered a biological enemy, but not “human”, thus the lack of choking.



You can steal a Venom Ring, which is appropriate, as most of Voyager’s attacks involve poison. Also, maybe to show his mastery over his Testament “body”, Voyager doesn’t transform into a gnosis monster, just randomly summons one for attacks. Maybe it’s his heartless? I don’t know.



And he can steal HP. Yay.



I think this is the strongest attack he has. It might not seem like much, but if your party isn’t protected from poison, a multi-character poisoning can really put your gang behind in turn utilization.



There was only ever one way this battle could end.



Of course, like so many Xenosaga bosses, he just gets right back up like nothing happened. Incidentally, this fight can be pretty tough, because there are literally no battles between the fairly weak Mai and Leopold and this fight against an impossible monster man. You do have (almost) the full party together prior to Shion’s nap, though, so I guess you could grind against old dungeons if you’re absolutely stuck.



Ziggy reaffirms his connection with Voyager. If you missed Pied Piper or the ending of XS2, this is pretty essential.



Ziggy believes that many conversations are enhanced by gigantic cannons.



Voyager can deal.



Aw, he knows his name. I suppose that this also doubles as foreshadowing for other testaments being “real people”.



And it turns out Ziggy was deliberately distracting Erich so KOS-MOS could get in position.



Hilbert plus…



Right through the chest.



That would have probably made more of an impact on someone that can’t breathe in space. Red Testament’s voice chastises Black Testament for wasting time.



“If she has awakened, then we must devise our next move”

Little harder to kidnap someone when they’re awake, eh?



Voyager speaks for the first time in the franchise (not counting spinoffs).



“I'm sorry, but it seems your time is up. You'll pay for what you have done. We will settle this later at a more appropriate time.”

I guess he’s still pissed off at Ziggy for not joining him a century ago? Some people really know how to hold a grudge.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

“Hey! Only my girlfriend calls me that!”



“Zounds, MOMO, how long have you been there?”



Jin confesses that you can only stab an invincible monster man through the chest so many times before things start to get dicey.



But who cares? Free hugs!



KOS-MOS apologizes for dying.



Shion accepts.



And then passes out. Aw, she was doing so well.



Welcome to the beach! Remember this spot?



Yep, it’s where we had such a lovely conversation with Cherenkov. Guess we’re back. I hope that fartknocker isn’t going to show up.



Oh, we’ve got a different special guest. I’m assuming this is “future”, dead Mizrahi.



“Don't you think waves resemble the relationships between people? They ebb and flow, as if feeling the distance between them, and repeat that process eternally.”

Hey, at least he isn’t talking about sand. Hate that stuff.



Shion reacts with a hearty, “What?” That’s about what I’d say, too.



Ducks could be said to be like waves. Get to the point, old man!



Shion asks Mizrahi point blank what his relationship with her father is… and he dodges the question. I’m not sorry you’re dead, doctor!




“Words can completely change their meaning depending on the mind of the listener. They can change into good ones or into bad. Some words cannot be conveyed. What one thinks is good will not always lead to good results. You're a scientist, too. Then you should understand.”

So, sure, let’s just start farting at each other, and hope that properly conveys our feelings.



“I still want to know! Without knowing, how do I know where I stand?”

“I have to have something to tell my therapist when I get back!”



Buh?



Thanks for caring, old man I just met. Kinda.



Shion is as confused as the audience, and Mizrahi claims he’s being “helpful” for the sake of his late daughter. What did you promise, Joachim? To always be as vague as possible?



Joachim claims he promised to make a peaceful world for Sakura, and he wants the same for Shion. Whatever you say, ghosty.



“Don't do anything you don't want to. Be true to your feelings. Do that, and she will answer your call.”

Yeah, sure, tell Shion to do whatever she wants. That will end well.



And who is “she”?



Hey, it’s that’s woman we briefly saw during the T-elos battle. I guess I do see a resemblance to a certain robot.



“Could you get me a dream interpretation book?”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

I don’t get siblings.



Jin is going to try to out-stoic Ziggy this update.



Welp, he knows his sister.



Allen comes to bring Shion some food.



But decides to hide over in the corner and spy on his crush and her brother (check the left of the screenshot).



Shion is all about time travel saving her loved ones.



But look at Mr. Protect the Universe here.



She was a lot less dangerous when she was just getting teenagers to water flowers.



“And maybe so causality doesn’t collapse.”



Shion proposes raiding Labyrinthos for the anima relics. Seems like everyone is on board. Beats sitting around watching Matthews clips his toenails.



And we sorta don’t have a choice, because the universe is going to explode if we do absolutely nothing. Man, catch 22, that time travel.

As you can probably guess, the next update will be infiltrating Labyrinthos, but before we close out for the day, let’s check the ol’ database.



Seems that the in-game wiki currently assumes you did not play Pied Piper, as “the details are still unknown”. Go out and buy that cell phone game, kiddies!



And it’s not mentioned in dialogue, but apparently Professor used Erde Kaiser parts to build KOS-MOS V4. Kick ass! Our little robot is now part giant robot!

Speaking of our favorite (not giant) robot. Who wore it best?



V1 “I woke up like this” (Episode 1)



V2 “Isn’t it cold with no skin on?” (Episode 2 midway)



V3 “Destined for failure” (Episode 3 start)



V4 “Revenge of the garters” (Episode 3 now)

I’m kind of a fan of the transparency of V2, personally, but what's your choice?

Next time on Xenosaga: Precious MOments.

This bugged the crap out of me way back when. There are exactly two fights in the game where using Choke would be satisfying, but for one of em the game doesn't let you use it. Boooooo.

I'm pretty sure in the Japanese version you could see KOS-MOS's arm bursting out of Voyager's chest instead of a blurry beam of light, but this is just one of the examples of the rushjob censoring the game endured. Graphic vidyagame violence became a hot topic again, briefly, around the time XS3 was being localized for reasons I can't quite remember and it apparently caused them to censor graphic (err, 'graphic') scenes like this one with a heavy hand and sometimes with little consideration of how said censoring actually affected the scene.

The absolute worst, and most hilarious, example of this we'll see in an update or two.

You would not believe how slow this area moves, LP-wise...

Previously on Xenosaga: KOS-MOS is up, Black Testament is out, and Shion convinced the rest of the gang to storm Labyrinthos to either destroy or save the universe. It’s got to be one of those.



Picking up exactly where we left off last time, Shion comments to herself (for like the sixth time in this game) that it’s time to hit the shops again. Are there people out there that don’t compulsively check inventories for new items?



In a cute bit of continuity, immediately after the Black Testament fight (during which Voyager blew a hole in the place and KOS-MOS started swinging around pieces of the ship), you’re not allowed back in the hangar for a while. You’re not missing anything, but I guess someone has to clean up after all those cutscenes.



Nothing to do on the Elsa, so we may as well cut across Miltia to Labyrinthos. If you’d like, you may re-explore any old locations.



But we’re kind of in a hurry here. Heat death of the universe and all that.



Problem: We’re not technically allowed in Labyrinthos.



Solution: Kill everybody.



Ziggy was introduced to the franchise infiltrating a U-TIC base, and now, here we are, fourteen years earlier, doing the exact same thing, slaughtering the same guys.



Actually, thanks to time travel, Ziggy might be re-killing the exact same dudes.



After that little starter battle, the dungeon proper begins. Let’s see, it’s 8:41, and we’ve got the full party again for the first time since the mystic tomb-y place. We’ve also got Professor and Assistant Scott as guest characters, as somebody is going to have to hook up those Vessels of Anima when we find ‘em.



The lobby area of the ANTC is now technically an enemy infested “dungeon”, but you’re still not allowed to use traps. There’s no real reason to explore this lobby again, but it’s there if you want to.



Exploring the rest of the ANTC is off limits, though.



So let’s explore Labyrinthos! Again!



The last time we visited Labyrinthos (fourteen years from now), we crept in through the sewers. Now we’re going in through the ANTC entrance, so that’s a good enough excuse for a completely different dungeon. Does this place even have a front door?



The first area is a pair of hallways surrounding a central “command room”. The west side is blocked by bars (but is hiding a red segment door), so the east side is the way to go.



Slightly more advanced U-TIC soldiers stalk the hallways, but they’re not advanced enough to turn around and face their doom.



Those hover-dorks from the XS2 Ormus Stronghold also make a return for this dungeon. Guess they’re reliable, middle of the game monsters.



That command room in the center of the opening area is not going to be accessible yet.



Next area is the main “hub” of this dungeon. It appears to be blocked off by bars, but you can sneak off the side on those pipes to…



Some seriously spacious ventilation ducts. When are supervillains going to learn to stop building these things!?



Past the ventilation duct is the other side of that elevator that leads up to where Shion’s mom is being treated.



Shion considers making a mad dash to save her family, but she’s going to be a good girl and not endanger the timeline for selfish reasons.

Yet.



Now we’re on the other side of those bars in the hub area. This elevator is exactly what we want to use, but we need a keycard to operate it. Guess what we’ll be looking for for most of this update!



This game is so insistent that you hit a shop every time a new mission starts, yet there’s always a shop at every other save point. Hmph.



This dungeon is now a lot of hallways punctuated with random rooms. It’s like it’s a real evil office building! By all accounts, this is Margulis’s room.



There’s an update file to be found.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

… And Jin’s Swimsuit. What’s Margulis doing with that? I’ve got a few theories…



I’m trying to save the swimsuits for their own update, but here’s Jin’s tremendously more modest than his XS2 swimsuit swimsuit.



Here’s an evil business auditorium. Can you imagine U-TIC team building exercises? Do you think they cover “what to do in case of cyborg infiltration”?



It appears that your average U-TIC employee isn’t all that dedicated.



If you sneak into this dude’s room, and then destroy anything, you’re in for a battle. He's asleep standing up, but apparently a light sleep stander.



I think this is kind of a “trick”, as any items you find in the sleeping guard room aren’t really that great. On the other hand, it’s not like it’s a difficult battle.



We’re about halfway through the game, so right about here is where characters start learning their Level 2 Special Attacks. Here’s Jin modeling his swimsuit and matching lightning sword.



PUZZLE TIME!



The deal here is that you are to push two blocks onto those faintly green glowing squares to blast open a pair of doors. The catch is that you don’t really “push” these blocks so much as blast an adjacent block so… Oh, just watch the gif.



The west exit hides an ES item.



And once we open the east exit…



We receive a hefty amount of cash for blowing up both doors without having to reset the puzzle midway. Handy!



Past the puzzle lies our pathos for the day.



It’s (surprisingly mobile) Sellers arguing with (surprisingly alive) Dr. Joachim Mizrahi.



Sellers is basically telling Joachim to get back to work, but Joachim says that Kevin and Sellers already did all the good stuff, just leave me alone, I want to play with my dollies.



Mad scientist fight!



Joachim is pretty much done with U-TIC at this point. Dude sure makes a great patsy.



Joachim retires to his lab, and MOMO decides to chase after her daddy. Shion nods in approval.



MOMO alone enters Mizrahi’s lab. Hey, remember this place?



Glimpsed only briefly in a flashback during XS1, this is the MOMO hatchery. Once again, the XS franchise’s dedication to properly rebuilding locations is oddly impressive.



As we know, MOMO is incapable of convincing deception.



Joachim immediately accepts MOMO and asks for her assistance.



Daddy-Daughter Day is a success for at least one party member.



Joachim recognizes MOMO’s Realian-ness immediately. Complete conjecture here, but Joachim Mizrahi is a surprisingly spiritual mad scientist. It’s not confirmed (or denied) here, but it’s possible Joachim believes he’s talking to a straight-up ghost of his deceased daughter, a Realian “Ghost of Christmas Future”, or exactly what is happening, his life’s work is time traveling. Point is, Joachim seems like the kind of guy that would take any of those explanations in stride. I mean, MOMO isn’t exactly in disguise here…



Either because he’s genre savvy or he’s into talking to teenage artificial life forms, Joachim “confesses” that the reason he explored the mad science of the Zohar and its related mystical items was to revive his lost daughter. Basically “my daughter went to Heaven. Well, better get to work finding Heaven.”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

And he explains the UMN. Get Shion in here!



Apparently the space internet of Xenosaga is also the collective subconscious of all of humanity (and some Realians). Though I guess the name Unus Mundus Network might have been a tip off there. (And thank noted phantom Torzelbaum for pointing that out nearly a year ago.)



But Joachim laments the fact that, while he tried to hook up Proto-MOMO to the UMN to download Sakura’s consciousness (or something), it didn’t work out. MOMO is her own girl.



But he’s cool with it! Yay!



Seriously, he knows he’s talking to MOMO, right?



“Like, exactly like you.”



And then Joachim seems to have a flash of realization, and decides he “must stop them” for the future of adorable artificial adolescents everywhere.



“Elevator to my inevitable death, activate!”



MOMO is left behind in her own womb.



Happy/sad MOMO.



Hugs!



You may recall that previous Xenosaga Episodes ended with a post by yours truly chronicling all the characters, where are they now, where are they going, etc. I’ve determined that might suck for Xenosaga Episode 3, as some characters “wrap up” well before the finale, and it makes a lot more sense to talk about, say, Ziggy when he actually has his big cathartic denouement, and not six posts later. So, moving forward, when a character finishes their arc, I’ll take a more focused look at the character and what they did in the franchise.

So that’s basically all preamble for this: Sorry, MOMO, you’re done.

MOMO was probably the biggest loser when Xenosaga changed from “anthology” format to “three episodes”. MOMO clearly had a character arc planned out from day one… it’s just an arc that ends about half way through Episode 2 (reminder, originally intended to be part of Episode 1). MOMO is alone, she meets Ziggy, gains a surrogate father, finds out her dad might be crazy, appeals to her frigid mother, reveals her shared past with Junior/Sakura, and then finds out her dad wasn’t so bad after all. The end.

And then, for Episode 3, she… does pretty much nothing. The preceding scene with her dad is about all she’s got.

It’s a shame, too, because most of the rest of the cast is a series of immortals generally set in their ways. Spoilers: chaos isn’t going to change much over the course of three episodes. But MOMO is, essentially, a teenager, and there’s a lot of potential there. No, I don’t want to see MOMO’s goth phase (this is a lie), but you can really get away with a lot of character growth with a previously isolated teen that is thrown into extraordinary circumstances.

Then again, maybe that’s just every JRPG ever…

Regardless, point is that MOMO got all her character moments back in XS1/XS2, and she could have easily been glued to the Elsa bridge for this game, and nothing would change. Go read her description from the end of Episode 2, and note that nothing changes.

I guess it’s nice that she got to hang out with her dad for two minutes.



Alright, MOMO, your big scene is over, let’s get back to dungeon times.



A little further ahead, Ziggy, commander of stealth, stops the team at the sight of a pair of dudes we probably shouldn’t kill.



Yep! Kevin wasn’t just randomly bossed around by Kiddy Shion, he also distinctly hung out with Suou Uzuki. News to Shion!



They leave without noticing the party. Fun fact: if Young Kevin met KOS-MOS, the universe would collapse.



So let’s check the room they wandered out from.



The electric bill for this facility has got be nuts. Somebody turn off a monitor once in a while!



Suou, the guy we’ve seen exclusively involved in U-TIC machinations since we got back to the past, is actually working with U-TIC! Gasp!



Shion thinks MOMO noticed her mom’s name on the list of subjects, but...



What? Really? I mean, Allen and Shion both were looking at this list earlier, and they somehow missed Shion’s name? Maybe I’m just weird, but I can pull my name out of a random line of text from thirty yards away. I mistakenly assume people are talking about me when they’re complaining about being devoured by “The Gobbling Blob”.



And Jin indicates that he knows more than he’s letting on.



Jin, tell your sister what you know. The whole of existence is in danger!



Oh, that’s not good. That’s an Asura Realian. You might not remember those things…



But Shion does. Bad memories. Dead parent memories.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

“You rarely see giant sword arms on nurse Realians.”



Well, that explains how they got in. I mean, the elevator is right over there…



Yep! Your dead fiancée built the Realians that killed your parents! Then again, he also built the robot that wound up killing him, so maybe that’s fair? Point is: Kevin was really bad at his job.



Jin is concerned for his sister. Not concerned enough to tell her the truth, but concerned, all the same.



Yeah, let’s keep going. For the mission.



But, hey, keycard! Yay! Now we can use that elevator.



And the hallway Kevin and Suou left through is a shortcut back to that elevator. Good. Shion needed a break.



Going down?



And now for a monorail ride. You may recall that we took a monorail from the sewer area of Labyrinthos to the Zohar room during XS2, and this is basically the same deal.



In fact, this room is very similar to the sameish area in XS2.



“Sameish” because this area has a “secret” elevator…



That Jin has used before. When, you ask?



Xenosaga is being clever again. This elevator leads to a catwalk above the Zohar Room entrance.



This would be the exact same catwalk that Jin uses to save the party during XS2. No one was asking “how did Jin get up there,” but here’s your answer.



Naturally, this catwalk leads to a secret “ceiling” entrance to the Zohar Room. You’d think U-TIC would lock that kind of thing down, but nope!



And this is, naturally, the exact same room that housed the Zohar/Proto Omega/Cecily & Cathe during XS2. Junior! Scratch your name into the wall so your future self will be confused in fourteen years!



And we get to watch Suou and Margulis hanging out. This is one “retcon” that at least makes a certain amount of sense, as both Jin and Margulis trained with Jin’s grandfather, presumably Suou’s father. Suou has probably known Margulis since he was in short shorts.



Margulis reaffirms that he’s been in Heinlein’s pocket for at least the last decade.



And it’s cute that they pay some lip service to the fact that Pope Jerkass is really interested in Proto Omega, his ultimate undoing.



Oh, and Kevin is here, too. So I guess everybody in U-TIC but Mizrahi was responsible for the end of the (that) world.



What’s that?



chaos and KOS-MOS are wincing for some reason, and nobody knows why.



Erde Kaiser Zohar?



“Ya know, aside from these two children Realians that we stuck in tubes because we’re assholes.”



Hey, that is a good question. Wait… are you going to start sticking Shion’s mom in a tube?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Realians don’t feel fear? Someone should tell MOMO that. But I guess the explanation (finally) for Realians like Cecily & Cathe being bullied into Zohar experiments is that Realians don’t feel fear like humans, so they don’t freak out like, say, Voyager did when he encountered U-DO during Pied Piper.



Coming into contact with U-DO/the Zohar can make your body disappear, eh? Oh, wait, we actually knew that from practically the start of the franchise when random space dude evaporated after touching the Zohar. Wonder where those evaporated consciousnesses go…



“In order to control the Zohar, we must use Lemegeton and convey human will from the Vessels of Anima via the U.M.N.”

It really bothers me how this obvious technobabble is starting to make sense to me. Lemegeton (the program Grimoire of A Missing Year designed back on Earth) allows “human will” to influence and potentially control the most powerful relic in the cosmos.



“But that results in direct contact with U-DO and U-DO invokes primal fear in human beings. Humans reject others. Those who are rejected are overcome with fear of isolation. That fear is even stronger than that of death since humans are weak.”

But a human going straight to U-DO invokes that previously mentioned “primal fear”. Realians don’t have that problem, but what happens to a human that has rejected all the rest of humanity? Do they become some kind of monster? Do they get… salty?



“The Realian consciousness unavoidably suffers stress since it acts as a wall to suppress the human fear of U-DO.”

So Cecily & Cathe were (are?... damn time travel) just there so Pope Jerkass wouldn’t freak out when trying to control Proto Omega/The Zohar. Makes you wonder what Abel, current pilot of Omega, has going on upstairs.



“BTW, Vector is on board.”



It’s commented that Pope Jerkass wouldn’t like knowing that Vector is participating, so screw him, he doesn’t have to know. He’ll be vaporized soon enough, anyway.



JIN, YOU INCREDIBLE DOUCHE, JUST TELL SHION WHAT IS HAPPENING!!!



Anyway, past Voyeur’s Corner is a savepoint and an elevator. That elevator leads to…



The Anima room!



Professor is excited!



“Assistant Scott? My science crowbar, please.”



Or I guess they just open with the press of a button. At least they’re yet another thing in Xenosaga that evokes a coffin.



“Hey, it’s that ES we beat up during XS1!”




There’s your ES rundown, folks.



Three are ready to go. Let’s see here… Dan, Judah, and Simeon? Just a guess.



And, yes, there are only eleven, because Asher is busy getting ready for the intro of XS2.



Evidently that’s wrong!



Reminder:





But I guess for now we’ll claim it’s some kind of U-TIC/Vector weapons deal.



Professor ain’t got time for postulation. Let’s get those giant robots ready!



So Dinah, Zebulun, and Reuben are just stealing the Anima Relics from their past selves, but Old Asher already has its Anima, so we’re kind of stuck there. Also, I kind of love the idea of Professor just jamming some other Vessel of Anima into the Asher and hoping for the best.



But Asher gets a consolatory Erde Kaiser engine instead! Rock! Oddly enough, this will be important at the end of the game.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Junior is adorably defensive of Asher using nonstandard parts. chaos takes it in stride.



Maybe… that’s not a good idea.



And an alarm goes off.



Professor notes that he was using U-TIC gear to get the ESes ready, so, yeah, he’s not exactly stealthy.



ESes! Transform and hover out!



Middle of the game, time for a power-up.



Everyone considers Virgil’s nonsense spiel from back at the tomb, aka the last time this happened.



chaos knows more than he’s letting on, but even noting that feels redundant at this point.



This is one of those weird gameplay disconnects that happens on occasion. Since their (real) introduction in XS2, it’s been stated that controlling an ES is difficult and “taxing” for a human being. Yet there’s never any indication of that during the ES sections, and we even saw Allen co-pilot one of these bots. But, sure, we’ll be careful.



“What was that, chaos?” “Just foreshadowing! Don’t worry about it!”



So now we have the ability to use Level 2 anima nonsense while piloting the ESes. This also means that the anima gauge will fill up faster, so we can use Level 1 nonsense more often.



Meanwhile, back at the command center… Hey, it’s Past Pellegri. Haven’t seen her in a while.



“We watched them do it, but, ya know, giant robots. Kind of didn’t want to get smooshed.”



“We need a boss for this dungeon, you imbecile!”



Yeah, that never has any ramifications.



So the final bit of this dungeon is the ES section. ES Asher is being stuck in reserve because, without its Vessel of Anima, it can’t use special attacks. And I like special attacks!



This area is pretty much a straight series of hallways, but I guess we haven’t used the giant robots in a while, so it’s a change of pace.



Poor Asher, eternally stuck at zero anima.



Two identical hallways later…



And here’s our way out, complete with a savepoint and shop.



The absolute end of this dungeon is a series of branching paths that either lead to treasure or the way out.



Let’s focus on that “way out” thing.



I bet they’re talking about stuff that is plot relevant!



It is a wonder that Shion wound up with a name that actually sounds like a name. Her mom couldn’t even score a consonant.



But I guess that isn’t important right now.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Shion hops out of her ES. In the middle of an enemy base. While they’re already on high alert.



KOS-MOS is as concerned as her processor will allow.



“You’ll understand when you’re my age and go back in time to save me!”



“Toodles!”



“I told you to put a leash on that one!”



No time for that, though, the boss is here.



“Not a good time, mysterious mech!”



So here’s Omega Universitas. Xenogears fans may notice that this mech is basically Weltall, Fei’s starting gear. This is, of course, deliberate.



And like Weltall, Omega Universitas attacks with karate. In fact, you want to try to avoid using direct contact moves during this battle, as OU counters a lot.



And when it wants to be annoying, it releases a wave of death that is just a pain in the ass.



But it’s also not very hard to start this battle with three completely filled anima gauges.



Which, ya know…



Isn’t good for the bad guys.



Look out! It knows the hadouken motion!



Yeesh, now even the nothing bosses are ending their battles without falling down.



It’s really well made?



Oh no! It’s going to enter ID mode! We’re completely screwed!



But… it shorts out. Experimental weapon, remember?



Bye! Talk to you again when I feel like dealing with the hardest ES battle in the game!



Oh, Shion ran away, too. Right.



But the U-TIC cavalry is here.



Come on, Junior, stand your ground and earn unlimited experience.



He said while cutting two AMWS completely in half.



“She just acts like one. Now let’s leave, my blood sugar is low.”



“I’m sure the second weakest member of our party will be fine completely alone in an enemy base.”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Hey, she made pretty good time getting through that dungeon again.



*sneak sneak sneak sneak*



Buuuuuut…



Determined Shion is best Shion.



Red Testament replies with simply Shion’s name… and she doesn’t appreciate it.



Red is hurt.



Here it comes!



Get your fainting couch ready!



Red Testament is Roth Mantel Kevin! Wow!



“Back from the dead, or back here, specifically?”



Whoops, company.



And Shion gets captured.



Kevin, you psycho hosebeast.



And that’s the chapter, folks. Enjoy the KOS-MOS V4 pinup.



9:49, another hour of inoffensive dungeoning sprinkled with revelations. And I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess we’ll be back. I don’t think Allen is going to let anyone go back to the future without his boss…

Next time on Xenosaga: Get equipped with laser crossbow!