Xenosaga: Was mi�riert

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Luckily, these things are very weak to Zebulun (MOMO)’s basic ether attacks, so feel free to farm the beasts near the savepoint and gain a few levels. Also worth noting: these are the first gnosis creatures to be fought via ES.



Here’s that Red Segment Door that houses Erde Kaiser Fury’s torso. Yes, we’re a little out of chronological order for expediency. Oh, and, no, you cannot summon Erde from within an ES.



The Desert gives way to a cave network. Each of these paths lead to a treasure, save the middleish route that leads to the boss.



This console allows you to rotate the central platform so you may visit new and interesting locations.



The sandworms are staying outside, the cave area is crawling with an all-new, all-annoying gnosis.



Ashmed Bapuzes are flying, insectoid dragon looking things that have incredible speed. They’ll probably attack twice for every one move your ESes get. This is terrible, because healing from within an ES is a pain in the ass, and, with a lucky critical or two, you could easily go from full HP to “gonna die” before you even have a chance to react. Keep Zebulun and its healing skills on the frontlines and ready to boost. Oh, and the Abs are also adept at dodging, so don’t rely on “oh, it will be dead this round”. Giant pain in my ass, this dungeon.



There are a number of useful pieces of ES equipment to be found, though, so it’s worth exploring the area.



The problem with multiple route, “hub” dungeons is that you may accidentally find the boss of the area about seven seconds after starting the dungeon. Actually, that might be a feature in a dungeon like this…



Scarabeille is a mech, and our first official boss of this sidequest. It starts the battle by quietly waiting for you to attack.



As you might be able to guess, it will counterattack soon, and its offensive capabilities will be based on how much damage you do while it was “surprised”. I’m not very cautious when I’m steps from a save point, so I decided to unload early.



Well, that’s like your opinion, man.



Now Scary unleashes holy hell on the party, and get ready to be poisoned, which is no good for our ESes. If Scary starts stocking/defending, stop attacking, because it has entered a sort of “counter stance”, and will absolutely destroy its attacker.



I lost ES Dinah to that counter, but I was able to knock out Scarabeille on the next round, so hooray for me. This was, basically, the last “required” boss for your ESes. There’s one more really optional ES boss, but otherwise you can basically retire the ESes for the game now.



There’s a giant blue Forbidden Device, and it appears to be partially activated after defeating Scarabeille. Another two dungeons to go?



Sequencer C, the key to the Red Forbidden Device, is our reward for clearing this area.



Also, that passageway at the top of the room allows us to exit the ESes and investigate this Forbidden Device. Guess we’ll be coming back this way again.



Next target: MOMO’s Subconscious Domain (Summer).



The Red Forbidden Device is hidden a few screens in. Hope you remembered its location!



Bonus Dungeon #2: Factory. This one is all on foot, and it’s deliberately maze-like.



Alright, I suppose “maze-like” implies that you could get lost here, which is generally unlikely. However, a number of corridors involve a tight camera angle and a bunch of catwalks that all look very samey. I’m not certain if this is calculated and deliberate, or just a side effect of this area being vaguely unfinished.



There is definitely a pile of new and interesting gnosis floating around, though.



Oh, and conveyer belts. Always fun!



At least you can release ladders and locks as you go to make traversal of this area easier.



The whole “point” of this maze is to find the right switches to unlock the right doors/elevators and such.



Also, a number of the gnosis enemies are rather chatty.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

The second main area of this dungeon has a save point in its “hub”. That should make things easier.



The monsters in this dungeon aren’t too bad: they’re more a threat for their numbers than anything. Or maybe I’m underestimating their challenge because you can summon Erde Kaiser Fury to thin the herd every battle. The robot might not kill everything, but it sure can’t hurt (you).



We’re getting the best treasures in this dungeon. This key will unlock a skill that will increase our accumulated skill points by 15%.



These gnosis that appear toward the end of the dungeon and look like giant wrestlers do not mess around. They’ll boost and knock your party into a break state, and they’re prone to countering when not on the offensive.



Dungeon continues.



The third main area has a similar hub/save point structure. After you unlock the right ladder and kill a bunch of gnosis, you’ll have a straight route from save point to boss.



Dullea Soul is a big creepy mantis gnosis. Charge up your Mana Sword to 100% and… no, wait, I’m thinking of something else.



Dullea has Break Block status, so you can’t do that much damage through normal means at the start of the battle. Boo. I suppose you should use this time to exploit its ice/piercing weakness with Junior and chaos.



At one point it will fill the room with gas. I spent the longest time during this battle trying to figure out what that meant. Is this creature… farting?



Then it all made sense: the damn thing uses a fire attack to ignite the air and blast the party onto the next planet. Note that Shion suffered more damage than her max HP.



I got mad and killed the dang thing pretty quickly after that (say hi to my giant robot). I completely missed the fact that it drops a number of clues for the puzzle that shows up at the end of this dungeon. Incidentally, while its stating these clues (I’ll explain in a minute), it seems to slowly mentally degrade, meaning that Rod from GS Quest #14 and Dullea are the only two threads in this game that reiterate the “gnosis are decaying human spirits” thing.



Anyway, Dullea’s death unlocks the next latch on the final Forbidden Device.



But this dungeon isn’t over yet. You’ve still got a little more maze to go before you’ve completed Factory.



Here we are, last stop.



Last “puzzle” of the game. Each box has a particular plus or minus value, and you’re supposed to hit the boxes in the proper order to simultaneously light up the nine part grid in the back. This is generally like the “water level” puzzle back in the basement of Labyrinthos.



The “clues” for the value of each box are completely incomprehensible to an “outsider” like you. The idea is that this whole thing was a game between friends, and only the friends would know the actual values. However, if you paid attention to Dullea’s ramblings during that boss battle, you’ll have heard it say things like “Blue: 5, Red: 7”, which are the “answers” to these questions. If you didn’t think to write down the utterances of a flatulent mantis monster, sorry, you can’t fight the boss again, and you’ll have to just brute force this one. Trial and error is always fun!



Did I mention you only get five shots before the puzzle resets?



Bah, just watch me do it.



Your rewards are the Pink Book that will solve GS Quest #21 (see the last update) and the key to the next bonus dungeon.



Don’t leave Factory without your prizes! Not like you can just teleport back to the exit again.



The third, green Forbidden Device is in Other Professor’s home. Or office? I just assume Other Professor lives here.



Heaven’s Ruins is our final bonus dungeon, and it’s… a lot less generic than the other areas.



Did someone smuggle a dungeon out of a Final Fantasy game? Or are we just stealing from Miyazaki wholesale?



And who keeps designing these sky castles without railings?



The first section of this dungeon has a door that is locked, but appears to be embedded with three dull jewels. Any guesses on the solution to this problem?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

We also get a redux of those blocks that can only be destroyed from one direction. Yay for artificial barriers!



In the rear of the first room, we find our first target.



Yes, the elemental numbnuts gnosis makes a return appearance from all the way back at the Cathedral Ship during Xenosaga Episode 1. We haven’t seen hide nor hair of these creatures all game, and now we’ve got some returning favorites. Of course, these guys have been upgraded to “final area” stat parameters, and they retain their elemental affinities that may make some of your characters useless. Fire Numbnuts absorbs fire attacks, so bench Ziggy for the battle.



Defeating Fire Numbnuts causes a weird red orb to appear.



There are other gnosis running around this area. They’re primarily the same creatures you encountered at Factory, and you’re only gaining levels, so they should be gradually getting easier.



Blasting the red orb causes a section of the door to light up. Now can you guess what’s next?



You can see Ice Numbnuts around the western side of the area, but you can’t reach it yet.



So it’s time to tackle Lightning Numbnuts on the east side.



Shion, no, dammit. Put your arm thingy down and think about what you’ve done.



Lightning is no more, and an orb is our next target.



Now we can make our way over to Ice Numbnuts. chaos should stay far away from this guy.



And now we have to walk back over half the dungeon to get to its stupid orb. Meh, at least we’ve almost got that door taken care of.



Yep, there we go. Time to move on.



The second section of Heaven’s Ruins is this gigantic tower. You can just about see two bridges branching off left and right.



Each of those bridges lead to a mandatory gnosis battle against…



Some returning gnosis from the finale of Xenosaga Episode 1, Proto Merkabah. Given these guys were already the toughest “random” encounters in XS1, you can expect a difficult battle from these jerks.



These things aren’t impossible, but they’re probably on miniboss level. Jin gets the weirdest itch every time he fights one of these guys.



The rest of the tower contains the generally “normal” gnosis of the bonus dungeons.



Hey, a Red Segment Door. Remember this door, it’s important!



Save point (look for the yellow), almost at the top.



Final stop is this elevator that is guarded by…



This battle is insane. There are five enemies here, but each one killed will summon a new Zwerg Kape. If you let this continue, you will fight literally 100 of these little dudes. That is not something I’m ever going to deal with. If you kill every Zwerg in one blow, though, you don’t have to fight another one of these stupid things ever again.



Guess which giant robot is suited to this task.



Elevator goes up.



And here’s the real boss of the area.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Meet Nepos Rigas, some kind of mounted cavalier gnosis.



This creature feels vaguely like Great Joe from Xenosaga Episode 1. It uses guns (that need to be reloaded), and will occasionally taunt your party.



It will also intermittently throw up a shield that will pretty much negate your attacks for a little while. Don’t worry, it will wear off if you pummel it hard enough.



Eventually… a compliment?



The final phase of this battle is pretty straightforward: you attack, and if the attack doesn’t kill Nepos, you’ll be met with a counter that is instantly fatal. You have all the time in the world to prepare for each blow, though. So buff and stock at will, and then hope for the best. If you “lose”, only the attacking character dies, so revive and try again.



I’ve got superpowered Jin, so Nepos is down for the count.



Yay! Final Forbidden Device is ready to go!



And our other reward is Decoder 12. This is important: you must now head back down this tower, because…



The key to actually use the Final Forbidden Device is hidden behind that Red Segment Door we saw earlier. If you somehow can’t find this door, you can’t enter the final-final dungeon.

Also note that if you activated GS Quest #28, you may now battle Mad Skelter at the same location Nepo Rigas was guarding earlier. This means that exactly now is the first moment in the game you can complete every GS quest. Guess you can use those GS quest double techs on the like one boss that remains.



Back to Ormus Stronghold for the Yellow Forbidden Device…



Through the desert dungeon again (hope you remember the route!)…



And finally we’re at the Final Forbidden Device.



Space Coliseum is technically the last bonus dungeon, but it’s just an empty hallway and a boss room, so I don’t know if it really qualifies.



Remember what started this update in the first place? It’s Dark Professor!



Huh. Yeah, I want to say there might be a biological relation between these two.



Curse you, Dark Professor!



Professor does have at least one other outfit…



Kind of disappointed there isn’t a Dark Assistant Scott…



But there’s certainly a Dark Erde Kaiser.



It’s man versus machine in a battle for the fate of the universe! … We’re screwed.



First of all, Dark Erde Kaiser is the only enemy in the game with an unknown HP count. Luckily, enterprising FAQ writers have determined a few echelons for what attacks DEK will use at what HP count, so feel free to look up a FAQ if you need more information. Additionally DEK’s break zone is AAAA, so you’ll need quite a bit of stock just to break the bot. Also, it’s really disheartening how even our highest attacks only seem to reach DEK’s crotch.



And DEK has some pretty damn powerful attacks. What else would you expect?



And some attacks that are “dark” versions of Shion’s own Erde Kaiser “pieces” attacks. Luckily, they’re just as ineffectual as Shion’s moves.



And the accursed machine will boost to break your own chains.



After a while, DEK will raise the Kaiser Shield, which blocks the heck out of everything. At this point, you may break the shield by either summoning your own Erde Kaiser Fury (reminder: you may only summon EKF once per battle, so don’t waste it at the start) or using five double techs. Hey, finally, a use for double techs! Either way, it’s working together (with Professor or other party members) that extinguishes the shield of darkness.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

After the shield is broken, DEK is weak to everything, and you’re in the homestretch.



Doesn’t mean Dark Professor doesn’t still have a few tricks up his sleeve.



Finally, the monster mech is brought to its knees.



Bah, we do all the work, and Professor gets all the credit.



And Dark Professor admits this was all a ruse to make sure that Professor didn’t try the same “take over the UMN stunt”. Wait… are we sure Professor is a good guy?




And our “reward” for this giant quest is the knowledge that there are even more super bosses lurking out there. Dammit! At least if this game was created a generation later, we’d earn an Achievement/Trophy.



Yep, that’s it. Nothing more to do here. No treasure, no nothing. Again, even if you complete this whole giant sidequest, the recap page for every load keeps encouraging you to defeat Dark Professor.



At least Professor himself acknowledges your achievement. Other Professor will still offer the same canned advice from when the quest started.



Alright, three last super bosses. Note that all of these bosses are unique to the US release of XS2, not unlike the optional WEAPONS of Final Fantasy 7. The first boss spawns after clearing the game, and doesn’t require defeating Dark Erde Kaiser. It may be found at the same place where Shion first obtained ES Dinah on the Dammerung.



Phobos Rigas is a color swap of Nepos Rigas, and attacks in a very similar manner.



Hey, lucky us.



Phobos will “raise [its] fear level” throughout the bout, which just means it buffs itself after losing incremental amounts of HP. Feel free to cast Annihilation (XS2’s Dispel spell) to cancel any of its advantages.



And mind the occasional super powerful attack.



Our reward is another EMax300. Should have probably fought this guy before the final ES dungeon…



The second and third super bosses require that DEK already be defeated. Baal Zebul is hiding at the end of the introductory dungeon (Old Miltia).



This guy is a biological entity (like a soldier/Realian), and not a gnosis. Also, he’s gross.



BZ is pretty much invulnerable if attacked from the front, so navigate at least one party member behind the creature.



There, much better.



BZ’s gimmick is that he spews his bile kind of like a Final Fantasy Jump command: the bile will “land” on the targeted character if said character doesn’t move before the next “round”. So, yeah, this entire battle is about the only fight in Xenosaga Episode 2 that the “move” command becomes mandatory.



Strike BZ a bunch, and he’ll lower his defenses so you can attack from any angle… but you’ll also get pummeled in the process. Pick your poison.



What a looker. Naturally, since this battle is all about moving, Baal will occasionally use an attack that limits all movement. Jerk.



We’ve won an Auto Recover for our troubles. This is an ES item that will auto-revive your ES once per battle. Actually, you may win (or steal) this item or the EMax300 from the super boss trio. Just what I happened to acquire is featured here.



The final super boss is located in the desert at the same location where Scarabeille was camping earlier.



Ugh, this post has gone on long enough, so I’ll just sum up Mikumari’s basic attack pattern. Each battle starts with Mikumari in Creeping in the Dark mode, and your ESes will be hit with a gauntlet of brutal attacks. After the attacks end, hopefully you’re still standing, and Mikumari will switch into Pure mode, and you’ve got four rounds to heal and prepare for the pattern to repeat itself. As long as you can stay on the offensive and survive, this isn’t a tough battle, you just have to be lucky enough to never get hit with a critical. Assuming luck is on your side, Mikumari will be dust soon enough.

And that’s it! Every last thing to see in Xenosaga Episode 2. We’ll talk about what all these extra dungeons and bosses mean in the XS2 wrap-up post, which should be soon, because…

Next time on Xenosaga: All kinds of fratricide.

Professor starts by indicating that he may have a twin out there somewhere... then Other Professor says they all went to school together.

How is Professor unsure about this?

What does Mikumari drop?

I am making my way through this. Slowly.
This GIF is driving me absolutely insane. I just want to see Ziggy get back up there and do it right. He was almost there!!

Great LP

Way back when I 100%'d Xenosaga II, I really enjoyed the endgame bonus content. As much nonsense as the GS Campaign is, I really liked exploring the bonus dungeons and gradually unlocking the way to the Dark Erde Kaiser fight.

Looking forward to the finale! I gots things to say about parts of it!

Also, I never did the bonus content for this game, so it's all new to me.

I do not like thi bonus content at alllllllllllllll

I wasn't sure if i did the bonus content, but I was assuming I didn't because of the debt sidequest.

Turns out i did not do any of these erde kaiser quests. It's... completely surreal. Why does this exist inside of this game lol

I would have sworn I actually replied to this thread...

Professor and Dark Professor are living in a giant robot-based fantasy world. Other Professor has a day job in actual reality.

And Mikumari drops an Auto Recover or EMax300, like the other super bosses. Anyway...

Previously on Xenosaga: … Forget the last two updates. Think back before all the sidequests, think back to a time when we were just making our final approach on The Patriarch, the malevolent mastermind behind the destruction of Old Miltia. You there now? Good. Here we go.



Yep, right about here. The final choice before…



Welcome to The Patriarch’s giant shiny death dome.



As per villain tradition, Patriarch compliments The Brews on making it this far, bwa ha ha and whatnot.



Burn.



But our good friend has come back to us! Yep, Albedo is back and encouraging me to quit this ridiculous game. Well, if you insist…



Oh, fine, I’ll stick around, but only because Albedo is making that adorable face.



Albedo is back on the stage a whole five seconds before he starts taunting Junior. “Happy to see me?”



“Hey, guys? Main villain over here. Pay attention to me.”



“Nope!”



Albedo volunteers to join the party! Ha, wouldn’t that be a hoot?



And then The Patriarch insults URTV pride, and Albedo is through playing.



So he starts flying around shooting laserbeams. This… I want to say he’s never done this before. Like, was he just waiting for an appropriate time to showoff that fact that he’s friggen Superman?



But it doesn’t matter, because Padre commands Proto Omega to blast Albedo out of the sky.



Albedo claims he’s invincible….



And then dies. Or at least fades away to nothingness. Again. Dare we dream that this is the death of Albedo?



One last creepy statement for the road!



If anyone wants to photoshop a despondent Junior watching his brother fade from existence into, I dunno, Junior holding a giant lollipop or something, feel free.



Wasn’t enough that he destroyed an entire planet, now that he murdered Albedo, it’s personal.



“Wasn’t he your bitter enemy?”

Uh… yeah. I’m as confused as anybody here.



But Junior has apparently become a psychopath, and he called dibs on Albedo slaying. Wait your turn, kid!



Alright, boss fight. This is the technical final boss of the game. There is one more fight after Patriarch, but it is almost completely impossible to lose there. Like with all the big bosses recently, steal an Awakening IV to earn a new double tech. Or sell it. Whatever.



You may have been expecting a fight against the giant mech, Proto Omega. Well, bad news, Proto Omega doesn’t do a damn thing for most of the battle. It just sits there, silently judging everybody.



Frankly, the best part of this battle is after you deplete Patriarch’s HP, he’ll fall over, a fake victory screen will appear, and then Patriarch will shatter your victory screen to start a second round with full HP. Ha, the game expected the party would be a max level Shion, KOS-MOS, and MOMO.



Second Phase Patriarch has much greater evasion. Incidentally, Patriarch is primarily weak to physical attacks, so a KOS-MOS, Jin, and Ziggy or Junior battle party would likely work well.



Proto Omega is supposed to start unleashing powerful attacks when Second Phase Patriarch’s HP drops below a certain threshold… but I killed the old man too fast. Sorry!

CONTINUED NEXT POST

I don’t think you know what that word means.



There’s some typical bad guy banter about how can’t you see that I’m trying to make the world a better place and yada yada yada.



Like many Xenosaga boss fights, we didn’t really accomplish anything with violence (is this a moral?), but Patriarch at least seems to be inconvenienced by his beating.



Patriarch finally reveals why Proto Omega is so powerful: it contains a UMN Phase Transfer Cannon. If those words mean nothing to you, it means that it has a gun that can teleport a bullet anywhere in the universe. The universe is doomed, and Patriarch isn’t even going to have to leave his chair.



First target: The Brews. Second target: Second Miltia. Third target: that one Taco Bell that always makes you ask for more of those little sauce packets.



But… the whole thing stops working before it can fire off the first shot. Oops?



“The Zohar does not exist for your sake.”

Okay, thanks mysterious trio of lights that are appearing overhead.



And our mystery guests are talking like Wlhelm earlier. Oh, that probably means.



Yep, Testament party. And they brought their ES crafts, too. See, there’s that ES Dan from ES Dinah’s maiden voyage on the right.



Blue Virgil has only been a Testament for a week and he’s already tossing energy balls around willy nilly.



And the Patriarch is vaporized while deluding himself into thinking he’s all powerful. First clue that you’re not omnipotent? You’re dead now.



Black Testament, a pretty quiet guy…



Apparently sees something smile-worthy.



Ziggy… is not smiling.



Hey, everybody, this is the guy that killed Ziggy’s family a hundred years ago! I wonder how Ziggy is going to process this information.



The answer is “poorly”.



And Black Testament (aka Voyager) redirects the missile barrage to nail Ziggy right in the back. Ziggy survives the blow… mostly.



“Voyager! Stop killing The Brews! We’ve got an entire other game to do that!”



Shion doesn’t say a word, but, like everyone that played Xenosaga Episode 1, Shion recognizes Red Testament’s voice immediately. No overt confirmation right now, but Shion has an inkling of an idea that her dearly departed fiancée might not be entirely departed.



The Testaments put their will together and resurrect Albedo. Dammit!



Albedo starts gathering U-DO, or using the Zohar to communicate with U-DO, or… something? Also, having messed up Ziggy and revived Albedo, the Testaments teleport away.



Yeah, I guess Albedo has been going on about U-DO for two games now.



“Everything floats here!”



KOS-MOS missed her big moment back at Old Miltia…



But she decides to combat this iteration of U-DO with that crazy tertiary weapons system from the prophecy. At least she can’t double blow up Old Miltia with this setup.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

KOS-MOS vs. U-DO is not nearly as Earth-shattering as Nephilim made it out to be.



I guess Captain Matthews just knew it was time to swing in for a rescue. Tony must be getting good at this.



Despite his injuries, Ziggy volunteers to make an exit.



It must be nice to be mostly replaceable parts.



Take that you stupid wall.



Second episode in the trilogy, hero loses an arm. Checks out.



“Why couldn’t you have dropped us off here in the first place!?”



And the Elsa makes its retreat as the Omega System falls into an U-DO Phenomena. To be clear, KOS-MOS did find the time to hop aboard the Elsa, so we don’t have to go through any daring rescues (again).



As the Elsa evacuates, Albedo rambles on about his favorite Unknown Entity.



Back aboard the Durandal, Junior is ready to do what it takes to end this.



Apparently KOS-MOS shooting U-DO a whole bunch slowed the thing down, but It will be back to fighting form soon.



“Kill Albedo? Got it.”



Junior leaves alone.



So we’ve got the ability to wander around the Durandal. We can’t go down to the Kukai Foundation, but we can wander the halls and talk to NPCs.



Party consists entirely of Junior. If you’ve somehow ignored Junior up to this point, at least teach him the skill that allows him to see an enemy’s break zone (Memory). Oh, and we’re at 16:30, which means the “final dungeon” cost us a little less than two hours (14:47 when we started).



Your first impulse to advance the plot may be to hit the Elsa, but, nope, you want to go to the park and have a good think.




Shion is here for a little chat, ya know, to maybe attempt to reassert her protagonist status.



But, no, this is all about the relationship between mutant brothers.



“I mean, again? We did fight him three times already.”



“Me pensive, him connected to a gigantic god-like entity that will devour the universe.”



“Let’s talk about someone I probably won’t have to kill.”



MOMO apparently hasn’t left Ziggy’s side through his repairs, and Junior wants to check on the big lug anyway, so…



Back in the repair chamber (?) Dr. Mrs. Mizrahi is recounting the amusing tale of a bunch of nerds geeking out over “ancient” Ziggy’s tech.



“You’re really lending me… a hand.”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Hey, has anyone thought to tell Juli that her husband turned out to not be a lunatic? I think she should know.



And, because Juli can’t turn off being a manipulative person just because she’s in friendly mode, she asks that Ziggy extend his own lifetime warranty while MOMO is standing right there. Go ahead, say no, Ziggy, I dare you. Make the robot cry.



Coy, Ziggy. Coy.



Callback to hours ago.



Aw, we’re all buddy buddy now.



“You know, when you attacked that guy that killed your family. Does that bother you? That that guy killed your family? Huh?”



We have come to terms.



See? Remember way the hell back during Episode 1 when Ziggy warned Junior about not freaking out when running off to rescue MOMO and defeat Albedo. Now we’re all on the same (volatile) footing.



Really? Had no idea.



Ziggy is done being the cranky old man. Just do what you feel, Junior.




So, what’s next? KOS-MOS offers battle tips?



Oh, MOMO, right.



“Nobody has seen Gaignun around in a while… And he’s Albedo’s brother, too… Huh, probably best not to think about it too hard.”



“Hey, remember when you were going to rescue me all alone? You would have died. Ha ha.”



“Come on, every party needs a white mage.”



“Nope, bad guy writes the rules.”



“Junior had to go change because he has explosive diarrhea. No, I can probably do better…”



“Sure, I’ll…”



“Bye!”



MOMO has a brief flashback to Junior’s greatest hits… which is like two scenes. Remember when he got her that bullet? Good times.



“Wait… can I pilot my ES craft alone? Oh, probably.”



Okay, evidently that’s a yes.



MOMO thinks of a completely airtight lie.



And she breaks under pressure pretty much immediately.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

No he didn’t. He very distinctly ran away without saying anything. MOMO, why must you turn this bridge into a house of lies?



Mary is into butt stuff. Got it.



So here’s the kinda final dungeon. Don’t be tricked by the save point, this isn’t so much a “real dungeon” as it is a series of hallways that lead to cutscenes. There are no random monsters, and the final boss… we’ll get to that.



Obviously, Miyuki is talking right now.



Or Albedo. Right, yes, that makes more sense.



Albedo once again taunts Junior with the whole “you’re going to get all your friends killed (just like you did me)” thing.



This is gonna be a long walk for Junior.



Each cutscene is punctuated with “walk forward some more”. I’m not going to show you this same stupid hallway every time it pops up.



Ah, here we are, flashback to the Yuriev Institute. Except I guess Albedo has his own entourage this time.



Kiddy Albedo wants to interact with U-DO so that Junior will put him down. Messed up kid.



Albedo gets creepier.



And creepier. Man, I’ll take Albedo’s brand of creepy over that stupid Patriarch’s sermonizing any day.



Next area is a version of Sakura’s bedroom.



And Albedo just plain wailing on the poor girl.



If you haven’t caught on, this whole section is basically a revisit of Albedo and Junior’s shared past through the repellent lens of Albedo’s perspective. The beat down of Sakura is disturbing, and that’s very deliberate.



At least “Sakura” doesn’t seem to be much of a person in this scene, and more like a literal punching bag. It… makes it a little easier to stomach (?).



Real charmer, that Albedo.



Junior can only take so much, and punches his bro across the room.



And “Sakura” morphs into MOMO.



You ever shut-up?



“She's already been damaged. By my own hand!”

Ah, yes, it has been a while since we revisited that overt rape metaphor.



And Albedo is friggen licking his fingers as he recounts the event. Wow.



Junior is coming around to this whole “kill Albedo” idea.



“Let's hurry up and finish this. When I kill you, I'll have everything. It's so disgusting... I'm sick of you clinging to me like this!”

Albedo calls the kettle black.



Next area. This one kinda looks like the throne room of The Song of Nephilim. Why did that place have a throne room, again?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

This room is lousy mirrors, and that means it’s a good time for Junior to reflect.



“Yeah! Go get ‘em, boss!”



Ya know, I’m starting to think that Albedo is deliberately trying to get Junior to do something.




Junior once again enters Red Dragon freakout mode. If you didn’t see this coming, congratulations, and welcome to the Xenosaga LP!



But a much more “real” Sakura drops by and soothes Junior’s weary soul.



Time to move on.



Last stop!



Albedo is mostly naked, save lavender gloves and an Ouroboros necklace. He also appears to be connected to some machinery from the waist down.



Ah, there’s the Albedo from last Episode. Let’s hear about your brand new world, Albedo.



Yes yes, you’re better than everybody. Move along.



Albedo is smarter than every single human in the universe… according to Albedo.



Now we’re getting to the good stuff: Albedo plans to bring the entire universe into a higher plane. This will probably only kill 99% of everyone.



And back to the same old rambling.



“Happy days are here! They'll name a holiday after me! That is, assuming they even have the concept of holidays on the other side.”

It’s good to have a sense of humor about genocide.



Junior is ready to stop this train now.



Could you stop philosophizing for ten seconds and let your brother kill you!?



“I've probably wanted to fight from the moment we were born.”

URTV daycare had to be the pits. No wonder Yuriev is such a nutbar.



Fight! Fight! Fight!



No Mortal Kombat? Fine.



Final boss fight! Despite all that talk of tearing each other to shreds, Albedo casts Best Ally (aka Life3 aka ReRaise) on Junior at the start of the battle. Like the absolute final battle of Final Fantasy 10, you literally have to try to die/lose during this battle.



But you can’t just brute force this battle, either. In one of those “the final boss of a JRPG uses the battle system’s gimmick to the extreme” situations, you have to constantly nail Albedo’s break sequence, else you won’t do any damage. Albedo’s break zone will change every time you hit it, and you will probably need to stock up to hit some of the later zones.



Incidentally, the “trick” here is that, if you know the skill Memory, Albedo’s break zone will be literally given to you every time you have a turn. At that point, the battle is pretty much as difficult as reading.



Albedo will fire off a move that reduces Junior’s HP to 1 as a final gambit, but he otherwise goes down smooth. And that’s the last enemy in the game.



Kinda? You were asking for it.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Yeah, nothing is more fun than a battle you can’t lose.



“We're not foolish because we're tools. It's because we're men.”

Oh, you guys are tools, all right.



Welp, time to fade away, Albedo.



Aw, the guy that was supposed to be immortal is the first to die. What a twist!



Alright, real talk? Something about the look between the bros and this line reading kinda plucks at the heart strings. … Now back to cynically mocking these two.



It’s hard being the middle brother.



And Albedo fades out with one last warning about Gaignun becoming Yuriev. Uh… might have helped to just state that, Albedo… but I guess that’s not your way.



Time to be carried off by a group of angelic Realians.



We have reached peak meaningless religious symbolism. I repeat, we have reached peak meaningless religious symbolism.



Junior curls up and waits to, I don’t know, get sucked into the vacuum of space or something. Sakura swings back in to move our lil’ hero into a better place.



This seems vaguely familiar.



Aw, Junior might talk a big game, but the enormity of gunning down his twin brother seems to be hitting home.



But Sakura isn’t going to let Junior sink into despair.



“Most of them mutants and robots!”




I reiterate, Junior did not make any such promise.



Oh, the other promise. Yeah, I guess that one still stands.



Yeah, alright, guess there’s a reason not to curl up and die.



“That's the Rubedo that...that I love.”

D’aww.



So… can chaos summon ghosts… or disguise himself as them… or… Let’s not think about it too hard.



Nephilim, are you actually helping, or just being cryptic as usual?




Cryptic. Got it.



Yeah yeah, big stuff coming, we know.



And U-DO dissolves or something, and leaves behind only the Zohar. I guess Proto Omega is gone for good? Did that stupid weapon even work?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Guess the game is ending because Nephilim says so. Fair enough.



Junior is back aboard the Durandal, and no worse for wear.



MOMO gives Junior one of those impossible tackle/spinning hugs. I wonder how long Junior was actually “gone”. Like, maybe a half hour?



“I think he summoned your dead sister, MOMO. It was weird.”



Oh yeah, the game started with chaos saving Junior. Symmetry.



Shion wants all the deets.



So... No?



Ha ha the universe was in mortal danger because two mutant brothers couldn’t get along.



Hey, yo, guys? Anybody remember that we left that object of infinite power just floating out in space?



Yay! After all that, we’re finally going to obtain the Zohar. Aw, and Episode 1 started with the last Zohar Emulator being retrieved, too. More symmetry!



Uh-oh.



It’s gnosis time again! We should be able to handle this.



Hrm? How big we talking?



Hey, Wilhelm is back. And he’s calling this thing Abel’s Ark. The last time that got mentioned was the ending of Episode 1.



Let’s see, the little dot is Durandal, and the bigger craft is the Dammerung, that Vector craft that contains entire cities…



And they’re both dwarfed by a gnosis that is inordinately huge!



Like, this thing has a few planets in there as decoration. Okay, they’re not really planets, but close enough.



Abel’s Ark is big. Abel’s Ark appears to contain an entire solar system.



And those bastards stole our Zohar! Dammit!



Then Abel’s Ark makes its retreat. Uh, yeah, I don’t think anyone is going to fight that thing anytime soon.



Wilhelm appears to be addressing chaos with this name. Jesus Christ, chaos’s real name is, basically, Josh? What a let down.



chaos appears to be chilling on a wing of the Durandal, just enjoying the vacuum of space. Guess he can talk in space, too. Hey, didn’t you say this last game?



Can never tell when Wilhelm is being sarcastic…



Time for the staff roll. Like XS1, the credits scroll by while some quick slice of life scenes play out. Looks like Junior found himself a pet.



This is healthy!

CONTINUED NEXT POST

If by “tough” you mean “rat”, then yes, I agree.



MOMO returns home to MOmom.



Juli wants Ziggy to, ya know, maybe hang out some time. Ever been bowling? You look like a bowler.



Ziggy now has a permanent job on Junior’s payroll.



But he can be transferred to MOMO duty for important missions or trips to Lego Land.



And, obviously, this is Junior’s doing. Also, Ziggy decided to go with that life-extending procedure after all, because duh.



Meanwhile, Jin and Shion are at the Dammerung spaceport.



Jin is going to join the Elsa crew to track down more info on Ormus.



Shion takes the time to remind Jin that he’s a quitter.



“The universe has been imperiled four times in the last two weeks.”



D’aww, Shion doesn’t want to see her brother die screaming in agony.



chaos and the Elsa crew wave out the window as they disembark.



Allen is only waving because he accidentally left all his stuff on the Elsa.



And Miyuki gives not a damn for Allen. Has anyone floated the theory that Allen is a figment of Shion’s imagination yet?



Gonna say that’s accurate. Like 33 updates worth of stuff.



Allen just wants a damn vacation. What, your hour at the beach last week wasn’t enough?



Paperwork waits for no weenie.



KOS-MOS? You’re still here?



And zoom out. Thanks for playing, everybody!



Oh, wait, one last clandestine meeting between Wilhelm and the Testaments.



“So this is the Y-Data. But there's a great deal missing.”
“But both he and the U-TIC Organization have completely poured through the Realian's main database.”
“He only went as far as the subconscious.”



Yeesh, we’re still not done with the Y-Data?



Yeah, let’s pick up that thread another time.



“When the path to Lost Jerusalem is opened, KOS-MOS will awaken.”

Oh, right, we completely dropped that “let’s find Earth” subplot from the end of the last game. Guess we do have to investigate that Y-Data some more.



“So, what will you do with him?”

Him who?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Oh yeah, during XS1’s ending. As seen here:



Yes, I seem to recall Wilhelm was talking about it being a shame that Albedo had such a minor role…



Wait… you don’t suppose…



A new Testament?



WHITE TESTAMENT!? DAMMIT!



Yeah yeah. See you next time, you damn immortal albino.



Game complete at 17:13.



And we’re back at the title screen. Now would be the time to boot up that clear data and perform all those crazy sidequests.



And let’s see here, our “real” final count for the game is 28:20. That means all the “bonus content” from the two sidequest updates took a little over ten hours. Yeesh.



Now here’s a more “balanced” save file. This is the memory card from my original clear of Xenosaga Episode 2 billions of years ago. As you can see, completing all the sidequests while playing the game proper… came out to about the same time spent. Like, a few more hours.



But while the ES levels are about the same (37 new data, 34 old data), the on-foot levels are way different. Shion is level 56 in the new data, level 43 on the old data.



This is because I never completed the three bonus dungeons on my original playthrough. As a result, I never fought Dark Erde Kaiser. Also, I never cleared Matthews’s debt. Hey, when I said Xenosaga Episode 1 broke my desire to ever 100% clear another JRPG, I meant it. Kind of funny that the times are so close to each other regardless, though…



And, finally, here’s the double tech we earned from stealing from Patriarch. This double tech is actually useful, as it will cast Best Ally (Life 3, ReRaise) on your whole active party. Pretty useful… except it’s a rarity to actually have MOMO and chaos in the same party, and switching either out after performing the skill will negate the benefits. So our final dual tech is as situational as the rest.

Next time on Xenosaga: You’re not getting off that easy! Let’s look at Xenosaga Episode 2 as a whole! I completed ten hours of sidequests, that has to mean something.

I saw that Venture Bros. reference, Goggle. Don't think you can sneak that in and no one would notice.

You are some kind of amazing for doing all this, GoggleBob.


Now, Spoony's ramblings!

Sooooo shortly after this LP started I think I mentioned that for awhile there I was roleplaying as Ziggy on a MUD-like. I started playing him shortly after finishing Xenosaga the first and I kept on playing him until a few years after Xenosaga III came out. So suffice to say, I was really addicted to re-watching all of the damn trailers for these games prior to them actually coming out. Nevermind that Ziggy was hardly ever a focus in any of em.

But when he WAS a focus, hoo boy.

The main Xenosaga II trailer ends with him taking out his aggression on that wall, and the only thing I could think of at the time was 'the hell happens to cause Ziggy to flip his lid like that???' This was important to me back then, what with the roleplaying and all. After Episode II came out in Japan I couldn't hold back and watched all the cutscenes I could download (unsubtitled and with poor documentation) and managed to piece a few things together.

Suffice to say I watched that final scene where the Testaments show up a whole bunch since, besides Ziggy's comments about 'death being rest for the soul' back in Disc 1, that was basically all of his entire character development for the whole game. I was really looking forward to finally playing the game in English and seeing how that same scene was in the dub.

And despite how good Richard Epcar is at Ziggy like 95% of the time, he, uh, kinda flubbed it there.

"VOYAGER!" (Japanese, English)
*epic wall smash* (Japanese, English)

A lot of it can probably be chalked up to directing, I dunno, but any time Ziggy really has to emote actual anger, Epcar just couldn't do it. Some scenes in Episode III are much the same way, sadly. It almost sounds like 'whisper-screaming'. Was he unable to be too loud? Were they recording in a room adjacent to a sleeping baby? ...did he just have a really bad sore throat that day?

Ziggy was always the high point of the dub for me (well, him and Albedo), it's a shame he couldn't be perfect 100% of the time, but what are ya gonna do?

But hey! Ziggy has a nemesis now! Boy I can't wait to get all of the backstory to that in Episode III (it's actually all in a cell phone game we'll never see) and see how he gets a satisfactory resolution (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA).

Oh and here's the music for the final boss. I... really like this track, actually! Like, a lot. Like, back during the Real Ultimate Final Battle Thunderdome it was one of my nominations. The music is a bit too intense for how easy the fight is, but dangit, to me this track (nearly) makes up for all the obnoxious town and incidental cutscene music Hosoe did. I think THIS track was more Hosoe's speed, and I think its great even if no one else does, especially bit from 2:02 - 2:56.

Speaking of the soundtrack, this is as good a time as any to point out there were a couple of tracks composed for the game that weren't actually in the game at all! One of which was the Image theme, it was used for some of the trailers and variations of it appeared in the game, but this track itself did not. Then there's all the variations of the Jr theme, there's four of them! And I think like two of them appears in the game itself, I think Jr #2? Back in he Subconscious domain? And Jr #3 played in the second half of the Testaments scene in this update. But Jr #1 and Jr #4 are otherwise just sitting there on the soundtrack. But hey, at least the melody of Jr's theme got in the game, that's more than Bitter and Bitter #2 can claim!

Bitter #2 was at least used in one of the trailers. You'll have to take my word on that, I couldn't find the trailer that used this track on Youtube, but I know it existed. It was a gameplay trailer instead of a cutscene trailer, so maybe that's why it's vanished from the webs.

Anyway, that was a lot of rambling about nothing. Xenosaga II is a flawed game that I honestly can't help but like anyway because, dangit it, it tried to address the flaws of Xenosaga I. In doing so it created a whole lot of different flaws as a result, but you can't accuse it of not trying.

Good Job Xenosaga II. You Tried.

Previously on Xenosaga: The Brews sailed into the sunset. “Let’s go home, KOS-MOS,” Shion said, confident in a job well done. … Wait, what the hell did they actually do?



What Happened Here?

The answer is, unfortunately, not much.

A quick summary of the events that occur during Xenosaga Episode 2:

• Albedo steals the Y-Data from MOMO
• Old Miltia reappears
• Old Miltia explodes
• Albedo dies

And that’s about it. On the plus side, no one is going to claim the plot to this game is too complicated. On the other hand, I checked out my previous Xenosaga “In Review” post, and there’s this bit about “minor mysteries” in Xenosaga Episode 1:

“Who is sending KOS-MOS orders? Why are Shion and KOS-MOS part of the Y-Data? What are the gnosis? What is Wilhelm up to? chaos? Testaments? What does the Zohar do? What did Ziggy “see” when he died? Why is Junior ageless? Why is Albedo invincible? Does Allen have more than one onesie?”

Xenosaga Episode 2’s answers, in order:

• Dunno
• Dunno
• Dunno
• Dunno
• Dunno
• Dunno
• Dunno
• Voyager
• Genetics
• Genetics/U-DO
• Apparently Not

That’s a whole lot of plot that XS2 didn’t even bother to address. Complete with Wilhelm making direct reference to unexplained mysteries of the XS1 ending during the XS2 ending, it really feels like not a whole lot happened during this episode.

KOS-MOS and Shion are generally ignored, and everyone always makes the observation that Junior is the “real” main character of Xenosaga Episode 2, but that’s not completely true. Junior just gets the most screen time because the story decided to focus on his past and his relationship with Albedo. If anything, Albedo is the main character of this story, if only because he accomplishes the most (which is to say anything) and grows as a person (mutant). And he was assumed dead for half the game!

When a presumed corpse gets more dialogue than the covergirl of the game, the train has jumped the rails.

In a way, this was already a problem in Xenosaga Episode 1. XS1 had a habit of telling stories (like Junior and Shion’s past, or the prophecy that would never be) that had nothing to do with the actual gameplay. Heck, Cherenkov’s entire stupid history takes place in a fantastic concept for a dungeon (horrible dungeon, neat concept), but 90% of that “story” could have been relayed during, I dunno, a pub crawl rather than a mutant ghost planet. This thinking seems to be dialed up to eleven for Xenosaga Episode 2, though. Did MOMO’s not-so-enchanted forest have anything to do with the Albedo/Junior/Sakura flashbacks? Did the Omega System do anything, or was it just a place for the final boss to hang out? Did Ormus Stronghold have a point at all? Like Xenosaga Episode 1, the fact that this game is a game doesn’t enhance the experience one iota, but now someone forgot to actually tell the story.

Alright, sorry, I’m being a bit harsh here. Yes, there’s a story, and it’s basically two completely separate stories smooshed together. On one side, you have Albedo attempting to reconnect with U-DO, and hurting his brother and others along the way (anything to do with MOMO/Y-Data, the Yuriev Institute flashbacks, Albedo’s return [twice], and the Junior vs. Albedo finale). Ziggy and MOMO are basically the supporting cast for this story. On the other side, you have Shion and her issues with her lousy past (lunch with Jin, Old Miltia and Cecily/Cathe, and avenging Old Miltia through Patricide). KOS-MOS, Jin, and Allen are the supporting cast for this side. Arguably, the stories only truly intersect when Patriarch kills Albedo, thus giving both sides a reason to hate the guy (and, incidentally, Shion helping out with the MOMO dive is clearly a sweeps style crossover episode). So I guess Xenosaga Episode 2 is appropriately named, because there are two plots.

And that could have worked! You’re allowed to tell a tale that contains two stories running concurrently. It’s been done! It’s just not done well here at all. Right about the time you get used to the Junior show, it’s time to run around as exclusively Shion. And by the time Shion is trying to cool off after child murder, it’s time to pick up that Junior/Albedo thread that had been dropped hours ago. It’s confusing for the player, and, coupled with a game that is lousy at explaining why Threat X is actually a threat (what’s U-DO again? I know it’s bad…), you easily get the impression that you’re missing something the entire time, even when the game is congratulating itself on a “mission complete”. Which brings me to my next point…

Monolith Soft has no idea how to make a video game

Wait, no. I should come back to that statement. I should say something nice first…

So Pretty

Xenosaga Episode 2 has a lot of cool stuff going on. The animations seem a little more “canned” than in XS1 (probably something to do with the graphic style or engine or something else I don’t care to look up), but we’ve still got a number of little flourishes…





And on top of that we now have badass action sequences…



And the occasional scene that does its absolute best to emphasize “really important stuff is going down”…



It all looks great. I said it before, but 90% of Xenosaga Episode 1 feels like a stage play, with people talking at each other constantly and, yes, there are evil space ghosts around, but wouldn’t you rather be watching Shion and Allen discuss company protocol? Episode 2, meanwhile, takes full advantage of its sci-fi adventure universe, and features space battles, magic sword fights, and the occasional giant robot fighting time. Xenosaga is still a series that asks you to put down the controller and listen for the next ten minutes, but at least now it’s doing its best to keep you awake.

And there’s dramatic improvement on the music front, too. Not every track is the best (some are so terrible they’re currently being used to subdue terrorists), but at least there are tracks. Half of Xenosaga Episode 1 is scored by footsteps, so, while the last dungeon theme might be a little… off… at least it’s there. And when the score is doing well (mostly during cinemas), it’s doing really, really well. I happily listen to the XS2 soundtrack on occasion, and it’s a great collection of tunes. We even got more than one battle theme! Come to think of it, I should probably address…

Xenosaga learns to fight

Xenosaga Episode 2 features a battle system that is… going… somewhere?

There’s a neat idea here! At its core, the battle system of Xenosaga Episode 2 is basically a war on two fronts: you want to “break” or otherwise put your opponent in a position where they are vulnerable, and then use all your strongest attacks to pile on the damage. It’s basically a precursor to the realization of the “stagger” system of Final Fantasy 13, or (probably more deliberately) the “topple” system of Xenoblade Chronicles. It’s a new and different way to look at JRPG battles, and it’s set up in a way that you could “brute force it” if you’re not really in the groove.

In practice, however, it’s terrible. Defending to stock, buffing your characters, debuffing your opponent, and discovering weaknesses so you can layer on the elemental abilities is fun for a boss fight, but when you apply the same preparation to every single random battle… it gets tiresome fast. I’ve repeatedly complimented XS2’s habit of placing a save point about every twelve feet, but when you consider that a battle with a new random mob may take as long as ten minutes (stock, analyze the enemy, find the break zone, buff, finally start attacking the break zone), repeated save points are kind of a must. Yes, you’re rewarded for knowing the exact way to tackle an enemy every time, but if you don’t have a guide handy, you’re going to spend a lot of time finding that perfect solution.

Look, there’s a reason that, when this kind of system was revisited in later games, most of the minute-to-minute was automated.

But I can’t really get mad at the Xenosaga Episode 2 battle system, because, while it’s a mess, it’s an innovative mess. Like, they tried to do something here, and, honestly, in a franchise that you know is going to be (at least) a trilogy, may as well do something a little more interesting than Fight/Magic/Item. I mean, we can always get it right in the next game, right?

So, overall, I like what I see here. I like the presentation of the graphics and music, I tolerate the battle system, and, while the story feels very thin, it’s passable. So why am I saying things like…

Monolith Soft has no idea how to make a video game

Well… because it’s true. I brought examples!

Xenogears is legendary, right? Like, this was Squaresoft working with the team that would one day be Monolith Soft. Xenogears was, in its way, originally intended to be a Final Fantasy game. Square knows how to make Final Fantasy games! They’re pretty good at that! … But, somehow, Xenogears wound up becoming a very fractured game. Even if we didn’t have the designers recounting their troubles through entire books, we still have a final game that distinctly drops its unique world into the toilet for the second disc, and a plot that reads like the writers found out a final draft was due in five minutes. I’m not saying that Xenogears was a bad game for these flaws, simply that it was noticeably incomplete.

Then Monolith Soft broke off and started in on Xenosaga Episode 1. Once again, famously, we were told that Episode 1 was just the first half of what was intended, and the real, complete game would be Episode 1 + Episode 2. Okay, guys, fair enough, but that’s two games in a row now that were, in some way, incomplete. Luckily, if you forgive Xenosaga Episode 1’s obvious “to be continued” bend, XS1 feels like a complete game, albeit a lean one. “Bonus content” is barely a thing at all. You’re either advancing the main plot, mindlessly grinding, or playing another game.

And now we have Xenosaga Episode 2. Let’s be real here: there’s no reason the “lost” plot from XS1 couldn’t have been wedged into XS1. If you drop the backstory for Junior/Albedo (so the entire MOMO dive), Jin and Canaan (“Oh, the bad guys are the bad guys we’ve been fighting for two games? You don’t say.”), and areas that were clearly just filler (Ormus Stronghold), you’re left with Old Miltia (super important to everybody) and the Omega System (“the grand finale”). So, Xenosaga 1/2 hypothetical abridged version: Albedo steals the complete Y-Data on The Song during Episode 1, awakens Old Miltia right then and there, the party flies off to OM, bad stuff happens, and then everybody fights Albedo with Proto Omega instead of Proto Merkabah. There, one complete game, and we only needed one more dungeon.

But the directors of Xenosaga didn’t want to make that “rushed” version, and, really, fair enough. I’m clearly hindsight directing this franchise, and, yeah, the relationship between Junior and Albedo probably is enhanced by knowing where they come from. And I like Jin! I’m glad he’s in the franchise, and he would barely exist in the abbreviated version.

But…

You’ll note that “my” version only dropped one dungeon from Xenosaga 1, but 85% of Xenosaga Episode 2. There’s a reason for that: the majority of Xenosaga Episode 2 is clearly unnecessary. As stated by the creators, there’s one complete story between XS1 and XS2, and, unfortunately, the most important parts of that story wound up in XS1. And it’s pretty clear that when the story isn’t driving the action, Monolith Soft has no idea what to do.

Or maybe I’m just bitter because I completed ten hours of sidequests that meant nothing. I completed three different dungeons that were pretty cool and well-designed dungeons and they weren’t really part of the game. It is abundantly obvious that “Factory” and “Desert” were areas intended for the “real” game, but never made the cut. Even Heaven’s Ruins could have made for a more interesting Encephalon Dive than a stupid generic forest. I spent 28 hours on this game, but completed the main story at the 17 hour mark. I want to say the count on cutscenes for the game is somewhere around 5 hours, so… some quick math here… 11 hours of sidequests, 12 hours of gameplay for the “real” game… yes, nearly a full half of my time spent on Xenosaga Episode 2 was separate from the main plot. And I don’t need an encyclopedic knowledge of Albedo’s past to hang posters.

That has the potential to not be a bad thing. I’ve devoted entire weeks of my life to Pokémon, and roughly 10% of that count is spent on “the main game”. But this isn’t Pokémon, this is Xenosaga, and, as I’ve just recounted, all the good stuff, the amazing cutscenes and OST-worthy music, is part of that “main” game, and absolutely not part of any of the side content. To put it succinctly: Professor still doesn’t have a voice actor, and his quest was responsible for three whole dungeons. There are just as many optional dungeons on the second disc as mandatory ones!

So, yeah, at this point, Monolith Soft doesn’t have a clue how to make a complete video game. They made an interesting story with memorable characters, but fell very short of making a game that does that story justice. One day, Monolith Soft would make a game that played to its strengths, and plainly learned from the mistakes of XS2 (why, yes, if you received battle experience for completing sidequests and discovering unique areas, that would make things better), but, for now, we’ve got 10% of a story padded out to an entire game.

If Xenosaga Episode 2 feels slight, it’s because it is. Shion, MOMO, and Junior got closure, and everybody else in this labyrinthine plot got to tread water. A villain was introduced and quickly dispatched. And the guy that should have been defeated last episode got to die three or four extra times.

For the record

I don’t think Xenosaga Episode 2 is bad, just fairly unnecessary. It’s the Ormus Stronghold of the Xenosaga Trilogy: it’s technically mandatory, but after it’s done, you realize it was kind of pointless. I actually enjoyed playing Xenosaga Episode 2 more than Xenosaga Episode 1… and I want to say that applies to when I played the games for the LP and originally years ago. But there’s a reason I spent months pouring over the minutia of XS1 at its completion, and barely gave XS2 another glance until the release of Xenosaga Episode 3. XS2 hits the ground running and doesn’t let up until Albedo gets some new clothes, but, once it’s over, you realize there isn’t much there there. It’s an end to a story that isn’t that different from the “half” ending of the last game.

Really, the ideal Xenosaga game would be the characterization and measured pacing of Xenosaga Episode 1 combined with the adrenaline and action of Xenosaga Episode 2. Dare we hope that that recipe led to the final chapter in the trilogy? Guess we’ll find out…

Next time on Xenosaga: But before we get to that, it’s time for the plot review of Xenosaga Episode 2. If the breakneck speed of Xenosaga Episode 2 was too much for you, this will be an ideal way to catch up on our cast and what they’ve been up to. The entry for KOS-MOS… will be surprisingly lacking.

XS2 is basically all the stuff that was cut out of XS1 plus some side shit invented for the game. It was supposed to be more, but shit got cut out due to the massive amount of dumbfuckery going on in the development process which got one of the head writers kicked out.

I do wonder what happened exactly...

The following is PURE speculation. Keep that in mind.

I just wonder if sexism didn't play a role in her getting kicked out. Game development has been rather sexist since the mid to late 80s(Girls were welcome at first... A woman developed River Raid, one of Activision's first really successful games, for fuck's sakes). There aren't many female developers out there, and few that work in writing games outside of the U.S. and Western Europe.

It just makes me wonder.

Albedo died for... uh... his sins? But not for long... That was as pointless as it was meaningless.

Wait... Now he's Albedo the White... Testament.

That Latin is not grammatically correct. (edit: I think I have already complained about this - when UMN was first defined during the Episode 1 LP.)

Also, I noticed chaos was getting somewhat intimate (more or less) with the ladies in each of his dual techs with them.

I just found some old files on my hard drive so I'm not actually done talking about Xenosaga II music yet, ha ha!

So we all know Xenosaga II had multiple composers, and the released OST only covered Kajiura's music. There are, of course, gamerips available of all the town, dungeon, and battle themes, but there's still more music that's in the game that wasn't on the OST.

So can you get these other tracks anywheres? Have they been ripped? Nnnnnope! Any cutscene music Kajiura composed we have since it was released clean on the OST, but any cutscene music Hosoe composed is lost since none of it is a separate audio track on the disc we can access. I'm a bit fuzzy on the technical details, but it seems like all the cutscene music in the game is baked into the audio files with the dialogue and sound effects for that respective scene.

Even behind the scenes, Xenosaga II, you are baffling.

Anyway, as for what I found on my harddrive, well back in the day some enterprising person took it upon themselves to try and filter out all the voices and soundeffects from each cutscene. They had, uh, middling success. I don't know how far this person got before they gave up, but I still have three of those tracks in a dusty old folder which I decided to upload for ya'll.

Enter Jin (You're praying? ...your chest? ....you're playing the drums?)

Arriving at the Uzuki Residence (Oh hey, books!)

Ziggy Repairs (Just go and show him a thing or two.)

I'll be completely honest here, the fact that there's all this music in the game, regardless of its quality, that remains totally inaccessible drives me bonkers. I like my video game BGM collections to be as complete as possible, and Xenosaga II never will be. Back when the gamerips of Xenosaga II were first being uploaded I poured over fansites and GameFAQs for any indication someone found a way to rip all of the cutscene BGMs from the game, so I could finally have my complete playlist. It will never happen.

Xenosaga III has a similar problem, in that the officially released OST doesn't have nearly all of the tracks in the game itself, but a more complete gamerip for that game actually exists. Audio quality for it ain't the greatest, for whatever reason, but it exists. No such luck for Xenosaga II, though, so enjoy these three grainy filtered BGMs with footsteps and echoing voices, it's all we got.

(I actually kinda legit like the track for 'Ziggy Repairs' and wish we had an actual clean rip)

Title

The full name of the game is Xenosaga Episode II: Jenseits von Gut. Once again, we have a German Friedrich Nietzsche quote. The English translation is “Beyond Good and Evil”. The original Nietzsche book of the same name is predominantly a tirade aimed at previous philosophers, based generally on the concept that far too much of the old guard was wrapped up in faith and absolute concepts like good and evil. Nietzsche posited that Man should look past these outdated moralities, and that “the evil man” is no different than “the good man”, they just have different expressions of their needs.



The most obvious villain of Episode 2 is a religious figurehead (good man) who, incidentally, destroys an entire planet in pursuit of conquering the universe (evil man).




Additionally, Shion is asked to save the universe (good) by killing children (bad). Similarly, Junior saves the universe (good) by killing his brother (bad). In both cases, the “hard” morality of good and evil does not apply, as murder is made to be a kindness, and fratricide averts genocide.



And, as we’re reminded when Wilhelm literally calls the title out during his intermission soliloquy, Albedo is at the center of this fuzzy morality. Shion is able to rescue Cecily and Cathe… because Albedo unlocked Old Miltia in the first place… because he effectively raped MOMO, twice. An evil man did an evil thing and a good thing was able to be done by a good woman. Technically, Albedo may have the blessing of U-TIC, and The Brews the blessing of the Miltian Government, but both are operating in a legally undefined area according to the Federation Government as a whole.

In short, Xenosaga Episode 2 asks the player to consider that the good guys aren’t always good, and the bad guys aren’t always bad.

Now let’s look at the characters.



Dr. Shion Uzuki

Where we started: Shion, somehow still Chief of Vector R&D, took a week off to test out the new KOS-MOS android and maybe save a world or two in the process. After meeting the rest of the Xenosaga Episode 1 players, Shion landed on Second Miltia, now with the mission of returning KOS-MOS to Vector.

What we learn: Did you know that Shion is really attached to KOS-MOS? After Vector pried ol’ blue hair from Shion’s grip, Shion decided to visit her last surviving family member, Jin. Actually, Jin kind of snuck up on her, and it turns out that Shion can’t stand her brother. Then Shion helped out some friends, stole a prototype ship from her employer, and, eventually, came face to face with the concept of “acceptable losses”. In the end, Shion set Feb’s sisters free (via machine gun), and then helped defeat their tormentor. Oh, and she seems to tolerate Jin a little more, too. Maybe because he saved her life? Again, I mean.

Where are they now? Shion was last seen back at Vector HQ telling KOS-MOS, “It’s time to go home.” I don’t know if this means that Shion has come to terms with her own self enough to let KOS-MOS go, or if she’s just going to permanently kidnap KOS-MOS and make her a maid or something. Actually, if this story were at all realistic, Shion would be fired about ten seconds after she returned with not one but two stolen “universe buster” class walking weapons… but her boss seems pretty understanding, I guess. Comes with the immortality. Shion needs her job right now, anyway, as she’s going to blow a lot of credits on therapy after this adventure. At least she won’t have to go back to Old Miltia again! … Right?

Best Moment: Shion finally comes to the realization that the universe isn’t all unicorns (not the gnosis) and rainbows, and sometimes your deathbot has to cause a little death. The death of Cecily and Cathe is basically the entire point of two games worth of character development, and it’s just plain a well-directed scene, too. All Shion wants is universal peace, but sacrifices must be made to get there.



KOS-MOS

Where we started: Good job saving everyone’s lives, KOS-MOS! KOS-MOS was instrumental not only in disassembling the Death Star du jour, Proto Merkabah, but she also nearly killed herself guiding the Elsa back into safe reentry. KOS-MOS was definitely MVA (Most Valuable Android) of Xenosaga Episode 1.

What we learn: So I guess she could use a game off. KOS-MOS is barely present for most of XS2, and only asserts the ol’ unstoppable android pride during the middle of the game when Shion is in danger. Other than that, KOS-MOS dodges her world-exploding prophecy through no choice of her own, and eventually gets to use her armor upgrades to repel U-DO in a completely justified situation. And those blue eyes didn’t pop back into focus once.

Where are they now? Back with Shion. There was much talk at the beginning of the game about the gnosis becoming more and more of a galactic threat, so anti-gnosis weapon KOS-MOS is likely due for an upgrade and more field work. Then again, while KOS-MOS has been very valuable to the crew of the Elsa, she’s been kind of crap at actually doing her job on a universal scale. I wouldn’t be surprised if a company as large as Vector has other anti-gnosis answers in the works.

Best Moment: I’ve made a website or two in my day, and I’ve coded each and every one to, in the event that I’m in danger, transform nearby objects into bitchin’ space motorcycles and fly across space to my rescue. It’s the best thing any AI can do.



Allen Ridgeley

Where we started: Allen is Shion’s second. Actually, that’s probably inaccurate, Shion seems to consider KOS-MOS as her most reliable friend. Allen is Shion’s third. No, wait, I think Shion listens to Nephilim, cryptic red headed ghost, more than Allen. Allen is Shion’s fourth. No, I think Shion’s arm thingy ranks higher. Allen is Shion’s friend. Actually, she kind of treats him pretty lousy. Allen knows Shion. Yeah, that sounds right.

What we learn: In a game where KOS-MOS barely gets any screen time, Allen doesn’t have a prayer. Actually, this is a lot like Sailor Moon or Dragonball Z: once we’ve got all the sailor scouts or saiyans or whatever running around, we don’t need to deal with Usagi’s mundane best friend or Krillin ever again. Yes, Allen is the Krillin of Xenosaga…. Sorry, Krillin. As such, we only really see Allen on the occasions that Shion is separated from the party, and even then, Jin kinda steals the show. Allen spent most of this game as wallpaper, but there was that stretch on the Dammerung where he left a sweat trail from Shion’s room all the way to the ES Dinah hangar.

Where are they now? Do you even understand how much paperwork you have to do when you’re covering for your boss/crush that stole gigantic weapons and was then involved with the destruction of an entire planet? And try to explain Shion’s actions without using the phrase “angry ghosts”. Allen is gonna be busy for a while.

Best Moment: Allen was actually complimented by Shion on a few scarce occasions. I’m pretty sure he now routinely Encephalon dives into his own memories to relive those precious ten seconds.



Jin Uzuki

Where we started: Jin is the supreme badass that singlehandedly took out entire AMWS with his bare sword. Then he defeated Margulis, a man that nearly killed Ziggy during XS1, in a wicked awesome swordfight. This guy is amazing!

What we learn: He’s also Shion’s brother. And, bad news, turns out there isn’t much of a call for rad sword skills in the day-to-day world of Xenosaga, so he’s just been kind of a layabout since Old Miltia. But, despite his years of idleness, Jin comes out of retirement (well, he was running a bookstore) for one last score, and winds up saving everyone from another Margulis attack in the process. Good job, Jin!

Where are they now? Jin decides to join the Elsa crew officially at the end of Xenosaga Episode 2. It’s unknown what will be the Elsa’s next mission, but it seems Jin joined to further investigate Ormus and U-TIC, the organizations responsible for the destruction of Old Miltia. This sounds noble until you recall the crew of the Elsa... so Jin is probably just going to spend the next six months drinking while chaos cleans up the empties.

Best Moment: Which Jin vs. Margulis swordfight would you like? I want to say the second one wins, since, ya know, it saves the party from almost certain death, but the original is the first clear sign that Xenosaga Episode 2 is going to be much more action-packed than its predecessor, so either works.



Ziggurat 8 aka Ziggy

Where we started: Ziggurat 8 was hired to rescue MOMO from the clutches of U-TIC and return her safely to Second Miltia. Ziggy did that, and, along the way, started to develop an endearing father/daughter relationship with MOMO. Is this newfound joy enough to keep the previously overtly suicidal Ziggy truckin’?

What we learn: Yep! Ziggy (rather inadvertently) further slots himself into the role of surrogate father to MOMO, as he deepens his relationship with MOMO even further (holding her hand during the scary procedure that is the Y-Data extraction), and coming to compare parenting tips with MOMO’s mom, Juli Mizrahi. It’s not a very traditional family unit, but century old cyborg dad, grieving mom, and artificially created daughter all seem to be pretty dang friendly by the time the credits roll. Also, Ziggy discovered the guy that killed his real family is still alive, so that’s important, too.

Where are they now? Ziggy now has an official job with the Kukai Foundation, compliments of his friend and occasional rival, Junior. In the event that MOMO needs a bodyguard, though, Ziggy will be loaned out to MOMO as first priority. Mom, I wanna go to the mall, can Ziggy come? Please?

Best Moment: Ziggy gets a lot more moments to shine in this game, but I’m going to go with something a little more solemn. The conversation between Juli and Ziggy while Ziggy is undergoing maintenance is probably the saddest, most real thing in this game. Juli and Ziggy are both parents that lost children, and they have a very frank conversation about how difficult it is just to be a survivor in such a situation. But it’s not all darkness, it’s this conversation that seems to turn Juli around on her feelings for MOMO, so Ziggy actually accomplishes something really important to him that would have been impossible without his grief. There’s a subtle moral here, and it’s that even when your life is at its absolute worst, if you persevere, you might be able to help people through talking about your own experiences. Also, it’s one of the few scenes in a JRPG that I feel like was written by real, live adults.



MOMO

Where we started: MOMO is the Realian child of Dr. Mizrahi (both), and contains the Y-Data, important information that Joachim Mizrahi squirreled away for a rainy day. As a result, MOMO is the number one kidnap victim in the universe, though she’s had a pretty good run of freedom thanks to her new bodyguard, Ziggy.

What we learn: Turns out MOMO was built to replace Sakura, Dr. Mizrahi (both, again)’s daughter who was mentally paralyzed and died young. Despite this rather creepy origin, Sakura and MOMO consider each other to be sisters, and, while they never really got to interact, they seem to have similar optimistic outlooks and taste in boys. MOMO went through a harrowing ordeal as Albedo once again tore the Y-Data from her brain, but she recovered, and eventually learned that Joachim Mizrahi is not actually a mad man, just a guy that was used by some evil organizations and maybe made a few poor life choices.

Where are they now? Despite some troubles, MOMO made out really well this episode. One parent got vindicated, and the other, Juli Mizrahi, decided she was going to love MOMO like a second daughter, not an artificial replacement. As a result, MOMO now has real home with Juli, and seems to have wrapped up any dangling threads. MOMO pretty much has everything she ever wanted, and would likely only have to return to active duty if a certain redheaded boy was in danger.

Best MOMOment: She doesn’t really do anything at the time, but I can’t help but feel happy for MOMO when Jin finally discovers that Dr. Joachim Mizrahi was actually a pretty nice guy. MOMO spent two games grappling with the idea of her beloved father being the most hated figure in the galaxy, so it’s a nice release when MOMO learns her feelings were not misplaced. Aside from one really bad day, MOMO has a pretty worthwhile Episode 2 experience.



chaos

Where we started: chaos is a member of the Elsa crew, and the only crewman that can vaporize gnosis with his bare hands. Also, only human in the galaxy that can do that. Also, relatedly, maybe not human. Anyway, at the end of XS1, this deeply mysterious young man decided that he was going to start being more active, and seemed to save the Elsa with the help of KOS-MOS.

What we learn: Not much! It seemed like we might be in for a lot of chaos info when he headlined the opening area, but from then on, chaos slinked right into the background, maybe playing poker with Canaan and Allen when no one was looking. chaos was his usual supportive self to anyone in the immediate area, but, for the majority of the game, chaos was a major nonentity. I guess we learned, thanks to the opening, that chaos is ageless, though. That’s something.

Where are they now? Like last time, we don’t really get any chaos information until the very end. There, we learn that Wilhelm and chaos definitely have a relationship, and chaos once again affirms that he’s going to take a more active role in future events. Fool me once, Yeshua…

Best moment: There’s some kind of understated glory in the opening scene when Canaan is repeatedly insulting chaos for being a “normal human” and chaos replies that he’s nowhere near normal. Ha, this is another game where chaos is only interesting at his absolute start and end.



Wilhelm & The Testaments

Where we started: Wilhelm is the president of Vector, and clearly up to something. We don’t know exactly what, but a guy like that doesn’t have creepy undead hooded henchmen for nothing.

What we learn: Another resounding “not much”. Wilhelm seems to play even less of a part in this game than the last, and only really appears during the game’s “intermission” to sit back and talk about how everything is going according to plan and bwa ha ha and whatnot. The Testaments show up to ruin Patriarch’s plans (presumably on Wilhelm’s orders), and we learn that Black Testament is an old acquaintance of Ziggy, but that’s about it. Oh, and Shion totally recognized Red Testament’s voice, so if there was any doubt about Kevin, Shion’s mostly-dead fiancée, being under that red hood, it’s gone now.

Where are they now? Wilhelm was last seen having a psychic (?) conversation with chaos. Hey, Wilhelm has finally interacted with a party member! Actually, no, he was last seen reviving Albedo to round out his henchmen with White Testament. Apparently, Wilhelm is seeking a route back to Old Jerusalem (aka Earth) to awaken KOS-MOS. At least someone cares about KOS-MOS!

Best Moment: I will never get tired of Wilhelm watching Shion steal the ES Dinah. Like, did he create this entire giant company just to let one random “chosen one” run around and steal stuff? Does he, like, cover for her? I bet the Vector rumor mill is just ablaze with gossip about these two.



Junior aka Rubedo aka Gaignun Kukai Jr.

Where we started: Junior is the VP of the Kukai Foundation, a company that has a general goal of obtaining all the Zohar emulators and keeping the galaxy safe from events like the Miltian Conflict. Junior also has a twin brother named Albedo, and he’s kind of a handful.

What we learn: Everything! Between repeated “random” flashbacks and a dive into MOMO’s head that somehow becomes all about Junior, we are now about six baby photos away from knowing everything about Junior’s life. Let’s see here: he was once a conjoined twin (with Albedo), he grew up under the watchful eye of the Yuriev Institute, he has the ability to “halt cell growth” so his agelessness is entirely self-induced (albeit probably subconsciously), his first (only?) love was Sakura Mizrahi, and his relationship with his brothers is… complicated. Also, he’s got a sister named Citrine, but I’m sure that’s unimportant.

Where are they now? Junior spent the whole game getting up the nerve to kill Albedo… and then he died. Then he came back!.... And died again. But the Testaments brought him back, again! Now, this time, Junior finally got to give a bullet to Albedo. Junior did the deed, but was not very happy about it. Junior is really good at repression, though, so he bought a puppy and named him Alby. He also seems to have missed that his other brother hasn’t been around a lot recently…

Best moment: Can you really say “best” when it’s brother shooting brother? It’s sad for everybody involved, but at least Junior and Albedo get to toss their philosophies at each other. It was very cathartic for everybody.



Albedo

Where we started: Albedo is a complete maniac that wants to reconnect with U-DO, and will do anything to see that goal met. He already threatened an entire planet once, and now it looks like he’s going to pick up his pursuit of MOMO and the Y-Data.

What we learn: And he did it! Albedo left a trap in MOMO’s brain, stole the Y-Data, and then unlocked the path to Old Miltia, apparently disintegrating in the process. But he got better! And was then obliterated by Proto Omega. But the Testaments brought him back to life! And then reconnected with U-DO, and became a giant swirly mass of red or something. Albedo was apparently going to use this power to “elevate the universe” or some such thing.

Where are they now? But he didn’t get to do that, as Junior flew in and shot the guy. Considering the majority of Albedo’s final dungeon was a giant taunt to get Junior good and mad, I want to say that some part of Albedo was suicidal, or his anti-U-DO “programming” reasserted itself to “trick” Junior into banishing U-DO. Whatever the case, Albedo was killed, and lifted off to heaven by Realian angels. Oh, and then Wilhelm revived Albedo again, so I guess he’s back, just with a snazzy new cloak. That thing is going to be a pain to keep clean.

Best moment: Albedo schooled the heroes at pretty much every turn, and only went down when at least one part of him wanted to go down. With that in mind, I want to say his absolute best moment was toward the end of the MOMO dive, when Albedo casually strolls into the chaos and sticks Junior in a headlock. Brotherly love, right there.



Gaignun & Yuriev

Where we started: Gaignun is Junior’s supportive little brother and president of the Kukai Foundation. Dmitri Yuriev is father to Junior (and all the URTVs), and coincidentally, was shot dead by Gaignun. Now, they share a body! Oh, what whacky hijinks are these two going to get up to?

What we learn: Yuriev didn’t even seem to exist in the Episode 1 materials, but now we know that he is the mad scientist responsible for cloning himself almost 700 times. He seems to have done this in order to kill U-DO, but why he would put so much effort into such a thing is anybody’s guess. When Yuriev was killed by a young Gaignun (Nigredo), Yuriev jumped bodies, and took fourteen or so years to reassert control. Now, Gaignun, whom Junior trusts implicitly, is switching back and forth between his own personality and that of Yuriev, who incidentally just took over the Galactic Parliament. That’s probably going to be important.

Where are they now? Did Yuriev just take over the Galactic Parliament with one pistol? That seemed to be the implication. Anyway, I guess no one thought to call Gaignun about his dead/genocidal brother, because The Brews just got the memo that Yuriev was alive at all, left alone sneaking around in Gaignun’s body. If there are any overt sequel hooks in Xenosaga Episode 2, here we are.

Best moment: I’m sorry if I’m repeating myself, but I just love that Yuriev took over Space Government while everybody else was worried about the Zohar. This is the kinda guy that encourages everyone in the building to take a simultaneous vacation, and then you come back to find out all the locks have been changed. Major villain potential.



The Elsa Crew & Helmer & Canaan & Mary & Shelley

Where we started: Here are the good guys’ support staff. Let’s see here… The Elsa crew is there for transport and general amusement, Helmer is the one friendly government figure, and Mary & Shelley are support for any Kukai/Durandal business. Canaan is the newbie, and… what did he do again?

What we learn: When the main cast barely gets development, you better believe Hammer doesn’t have a chance. Everyone just kind of carried on their separate but generally well defined roles for this adventure. Did you know Tony is an ace pilot? Mary & Shelley are great with computers? Helmer is helpful? That’s all I got. Canaan was also a mobile maguffin that had to be ferried to Old Miltia, but, aside from a few snide comments, he barely existed past the opening.

Where are they now? Just hanging around their respective haunts, hoping to help in any way possible. Actually, come to think of it, I have no idea where Canaan wound up. Like, he’s got the data out of his head now, does he have any reason to hang out with Helmer or Jin?

Best Moment: It turns out Mary has been trying to get a comedy duo together with Shelley for years, but Shelley is not having it. I’d buy that for a dollar!



Margulis & U-TIC

Where we started: U-TIC was responsible for the most villainous acts in Episode 1, and Margulis was the apparent leader of the organization. They even hired Albedo to steal the Y-Data, which he was apparently going to do anyway, but it makes things simpler when bad guys work together. Anywho, U-TIC’s ultimate goal appeared to be obtaining the Zohar, for whatever reason, and weren’t afraid to crack a few eggs to do so.

What we learn: It was generally clear that U-TIC was a religious organization (their main base contained a chapel, after all), but the connection became a lot more apparent in XS2, as U-TIC appears to be an unofficial branch of The Immigrant Fleet. That said, while Margulis and U-TIC generally followed the orders of The Patriarch for most of the game, they withdrew their support when The Patriarch gained Proto Omega. This was apparently at the behest of U-TIC’s true patron, Heinlein, who is certainly not secretly Wilhelm.

Where are they now? The Immigrant Fleet proper is probably in deep doodoo after having their pope attempt to take over the universe, so I doubt U-TIC will be getting much support in that department. That said, Margulis, Pellegri, Sellers, Richard, and Hermann all survived and are ready for new challenges, so I’d expect to see this villainous organization make a comeback. They seemed to be operating fine without padre before…

Best Moment: Margulis gets his ass kicked by Jin, and then up and quits on this whole cheesy religion thing. Look, Patriarch, it’s not that I think the organization is going nowhere, just, you have a super weapon now, and I’m a guy with a sword? What am I supposed to offer? I’m gonna take off.



Patriarch Sergius XVII & The Immigrant Fleet & Ormus

Where we started: Patriarch is new to the Xenosaga Universe, and he’s apparently the head of a major religion that looks an awful lot like Christianity. He’s convinced that, since The Immigrant Fleet has been responsible for the Zohar for ages, he is entitled to Old Miltia’s greatest treasure (that can incidentally power super weapons). Unknown to the public at large, Patriarch is also the leader of Ormus, an organization… that is apparently exactly the same as The Immigrant Fleet, but more overtly evil.

What we learn: The Patriarch is about as evil as it gets. He might play the kindly old space pope card for the public, but the minute he can make a play for power, he destroys a planet and awakens a universe-destroying super weapon. Apparently, he’s got some sort of beef with the fact that the kids today wear their pants too low or something, and wants to bring back good ol’ fashioned family values. With his death laser.

Where are they now? Scattered into a million molecules across the vacuum of space. The Testaments were none too happy with Patriarch’s plans, and they showed up to vaporize the geezer. Interestingly, I believe this means that The Brews didn’t even have to participate in this battle, it was just going to work itself out anyway.

Best moment: Let us have a moment of silence for Patriarch’s most loyal underling, Orgulla… Orgulla… is that right? Really? I thought her name was “Manes.” Okay, we’ll stick to Orgulla. Remember all the good times we had with Orgulla? Good times. Good times.



U-DO

Where we started: U-DO is a malevolent force trapped on Old Miltia, and if it ever gets out, we’re doomed. DOOMED!

What we learn: Well, turns out that U-DO is the central power battery for the UMN, the space internet of Xenosaga. This seem like a bad idea to anybody else? U-DO is also, apparently, a big red blob that never does anything. Like, everyone is always afraid of It escaping and ravaging the universe and whatever, but all It seems to have done is create a spiderweb or two in U-TIC’s basement. Get off Your maroon butt and do something, U-DO!

Where are they now? Hell if I know. Albedo had linked up with U-DO, Junior killed Albedo, and then… U-DO disappeared? Or did it get sucked into the Zohar? I have no idea. Like, It’s not an immediate threat, so I guess we’re in the clear.

Best moment: Vector Boss explains what U-DO is all about… and we still have no idea what’s going on.



The Gnosis

Where we started: The greatest threat to the universe since U-DO! Angry space monsters are ravaging the universe, and there’s a mad dash to create something that will stop them! KOS-MOS was designed for this purpose, as well as MOMO and the AGWS (remember those?). We have to do something to stop these gnosis before more lives are lost! Also, Shion might become a gnosis.

What we learn: Noooooooooothing. Okay, we learned that the gnosis have destroyed a whopping 120 star systems… and that’s the last they’re canon mentioned until the absolute end of the game. We fought a few gnosis as part of MOMO’s subconscious domain, but they were just battle fodder, and didn’t mean much. And I guess there were a few sidequests that involved gnosis that had clearly been humans (RIP Rod), but that’s all we got.

Where are they now? But the gnosis make a big splash during the ending, when a gnosis the size of a solar system identified as Abel’s Ark makes the scene and steals the Zohar. Gawrsh, I wonder if we’re going to revisit that plot point in Xenosaga Episode 3.

Best moment: See above



Professor, Assistant Scott, and Erde Kaiser

Where we started: Professor and his pals were a handful of optional characters in Xenosaga Episode 1. Professor and Assistant Scott built the best damn giant robot in the universe, Erde Kaiser, and… that’s about it. They brought love, friendship, and 9999 attacks to a universe desperately in need.

What we learn: Despite the fact that his old digs would have been easily accessible, Professor and Assistant Scott joined the crew of the Elsa. And Professor has an evil twin, Dark Professor! And Dark Professor might not be all that evil, he just… goes to extremes. Sounds familiar. In the end, Dark Professor was defeated by the Realian Justice Warriors and Professor’s latest creation, Erde Kaiser Fury.

Where are they now? There seems to be no indication that Professor and Assistant Scott left the Elsa before it took off with new crewman Jin. Amusingly, if you consider “booting up a clear save data” to be standard practice, Professor is no longer an entirely optional character, as you’re guaranteed to at least have one conversation regarding Dark Professor. Hopefully he sees a similar promotion in time for XS3.

Best moment: Seeing Dark Erde Kaiser on its knees, groveling at the pain of a thousand crotch-blows.

Episode 2, complete

Sayonara, baby.


Once again, I’m going to take a brief, fake hiatus before starting Episode 3. What’s today? Let’s say Episode 3 is guaranteed by August 1, but it may come earlier depending on how bored I become. Related: I’m not even going to pretend there won’t be an intermission or two this time, so I’m pretty sure this thread is going to update sooner than later…

Next time on Xenosaga: But what if Xenosaga was released ten years earlier?

Their relationship is quite simple - Shion walks on the ground that Allen worships. Also, she's his boss.

Allin? (I doubt Allen could throw a Destructo Disc. Also, Allen isn't into robots/cyborgs*. That's really more of Shion's thing.)

*Unless somebody made a Shion-bot.

Oh man. You guys are gonna love how seamlessly the story transitions to Episode 3