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Talking Time Presents: The Top 60 Video Game Enemies Exhibit at the Valdez Museum of Video Game Box Art

Lokii

(He/Him)
Staff member
Moderator
Haters gunna hate

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Torzelbaum

????? LV 13 HP 292/ 292
(he, him, his)
I dunno why this wasn't on my list! Eggplant Wizards are just the worst!
Just the worst wiz’s.
Yes, they are. But they are very iconic so I can see why they were on some lists. They are such a bizarre video gamey thing but I have to wonder if there is some underlying thing in Japanese culture that they are based on (or maybe some kind of pun in Japanese).

Also, do they call it Aubergine Wizard in other countries?
 

Lokii

(He/Him)
Staff member
Moderator
Yes, they are. But they are very iconic so I can see why they were on some lists. They are such a bizarre video gamey thing but I have to wonder if there is some underlying thing in Japanese culture that they are based on (or maybe some kind of pun in Japanese).

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WildcatJF

Let's Pock (Art @szk_tencho)
(he / his / him)
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NEW AGE RETRO HIPPIE (EarthBound)
earthbound-narh.jpg

#51 (44 points, nominated by Kzinssie [17], Rascally Badger [11])
First Appearance: EarthBound


Hanging out around Twoson are these carefree guys who just wanna like get to the point, man. They are so grooved out they just need to know the dimensions of everything so it's beyond unreal. Their dental hygiene is so out of sight it'll stone you baby. And, like, sometimes even the peaceful mantras can totally bummer out and turn into a total drag. "The hero" can either peace in or peace out, cause it's time to have a gas catchin' some rays. Keep a cool head brother!

He used to carry his guitar in a gunny sack
Go sit beneath the tree by the railroad track

 
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Ixo

"This is not my beautiful forum!" - David Byrne
(Hi Guy)
There was an Earthbound enemy on my list, but it wasn't this guy.
 

WildcatJF

Let's Pock (Art @szk_tencho)
(he / his / him)
So the top 50 will begin in earnest tomorrow. But I thought it might be interesting to see some of the picks that didn't make it into the top 60 on a few weekends. This will be a random exercise where I will use a number generator to grab 2 or 3 that fell short of placing, but are still excellent enemies worth a little spotlight.

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#122 Fuzzy (Yoshi's Island) Nominated by Issun #10

Famous for ...um....drugging up Yoshi and Baby Mario and having them trip stars for the rest of the level.

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#88 Big Bertha (Super Mario Bros series) Nominated by Dr. Nerd #6

Also known as Big Boss Bass, this giant fish loved to eat Mario if she could get a hold of him. She also keeps her babies in her mouth. Lots of mouthiness.

"A nostalgia vote for this very cranky-looking fish that I lost many lives to." ~ Dr. Nerd

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#135 Crabmeat (Sonic the Hedgehog) Nominated by Octopus Prime #12

One of the first and most prominent enemies Sonic encounters in his series, they know how to pinch a nerve.​
 
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Surprised no one else voted for Fuzzy. Yeah, they can be annoying, but they're also the perfect exemplar of the amount of creativity that went into that game.
 

Falselogic

Lapsed Threadcromancer
(they/them)
If I had voted none of those would have been on my list. I would have felt bad about not including Big Boss Bass.
 

Kishi

Little Waves
(They/Them)
Staff member
Moderator
Fuzzy doesn't even register as an enemy to me. They're more like an obstacle, or a friend.
 

WildcatJF

Let's Pock (Art @szk_tencho)
(he / his / him)
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WADDLE DOO (Kirby)
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#50 (45 points, nominated by Kishi [19], Rascally Badger [8])
First Appearance: Kirby's Dream Land


Similar in stature and appearance to our "hero", Waddle Doos differ from their Dee cousins with their gigantic Cyclops eyeball that doubles as a (unintentional?) homage as it shoots out optic beams. Beginning with Adventure they could be consumed to gain the Beam attack. In later games they adopt a wizard-like appearance when befriended, borrowing the hat from super all right fellow Marx. They apparently need to borrow the fashion sense of their cousins, as a bandana will get you Smash speculation.

Here's what some of our donors had to say:
Really cute. I can't resist that big, glistening eye. Waddle Dee can't compete. ~ Kishi

Licensed by Nintendo
 

Dracula

Plastic Vampire
(He/His)
It is impossible for me to look at Waddle Doo's original laser beam from Kirby's Dream Land and not see a row of almonds.
 

Beta Metroid

At peace
(he/him)
I can't believe I forgot Fuzzy! I voted for like four Yoshi's Island enemies and forgot Fuzzy...

Waddle Doo was on my long list. It's adorable. The beam sound effect in the 8-bit games is absolutely perfect, and for some reason they decided it should never sound that cool again. But Waddle Doo got a nice moveset upgrade as a consolation prize (I love the ones just hanging out and swinging on their grapple beams!). Also, Waddle Doo is an excellent boss slayer in Star Allies. I'm no pro speedrunner, but I think it's because bosses can take full damage from multiple sources simultaneously, and have no invincibility frames, while in Super Star, it seemed like a boss getting hit by attacks from Kirby and a helper simultaneously would only register the damage from one. Many of Waddle Doo's attacks do lingering electric damage, and some spray a ton of projectiles that can all layer damage on single, large targets (namely, the dashing jump attack).
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Waddle Doo is indeed pretty dang cute.

I might've voted for Big Bertha / Boss Bass if I'd thought of her/him/them. Put together my vote for this in a hurry and didn't have much time to look things up and remind myself of stuff.
 
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