• Welcome to Talking Time's third iteration! If you would like to register for an account, or have already registered but have not yet been confirmed, please read the following:

    1. The CAPTCHA key's answer is "Percy"
    2. Once you've completed the registration process please email us from the email you used for registration at percyreghelper@gmail.com and include the username you used for registration

    Once you have completed these steps, Moderation Staff will be able to get your account approved.

Talking Time Presents: The Top 60 Video Game Enemies Exhibit at the Valdez Museum of Video Game Box Art

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)

PIG COP (Duke Nukem)

#57 (38 points, nominated by Dr. Nerd [18], Kzinssie [16])
First Appearance: Duke Nukem 3D


Wow, this sure is, uh, mmm, hoo-hoot! Shinobu, could you, *cough* could you help write this one?

Duke Nukem 3D was hella sexist and cornball and trashy, but hey, they did accurately depict a future where the cops look like how so many of them act. FU--

SHINOBU, THIS GOES ON THE PLAQUE FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION!!!! Hoo-hoot, wildly inappropriate! No, it doesn't matter that I've expressed as much in regards to Rover and such being shelved for New Horizons! This is an insti--

ALL RIGHT! Got it, got it. Let's do this. Pig cops appear as mutated police officers corrupted to work for the alien menace the Cycloids. These baddies attack the "hero" with massive shotguns and heavier artillery, and are clever enough to lie on the ground to avoid shots. They continued to appear in subsequent episodes and games in the series.

Hoo-hoot, that should suffice. I need a nap...

You ALWAYS need a damn nap when the sun's up, Blathers...

Pardon me, but I AM an owl!

Donors had the following to say:
Duke Nukem is obviously a dumb/sexist series, but it is accidentally good when you get to take down mutated LAPD cops who are literal pigs. The instructions imply they hate all human life, and that's probably the most realistic element in the entire series. ~ Dr. Nerd
Fuck police, fuck police, fuck police brutality
Fuck police, fuck police, fuck police brutality
Fuck police, ya, fuck police, fuck police brutality
Fuck police, fuck police, fuck police brutality
 
Last edited:

Torzelbaum

????? LV 13 HP 292/ 292
(he, him, his)
But aren't those actually BOAR COPS?

(Feedback: On a phone it was a bit hard to parse that conversation between the characters. Maybe you could add the characters' names before their lines to help distinguish them?)
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)
But aren't those actually BOAR COPS?

(Feedback: On a phone it was a bit hard to parse that conversation between the characters. Maybe you could add the characters' names before their lines to help distinguish them?)
I forgot to add in some lines to better delineate the dialogue. What I'll do is I'll redo the uploads over the weekend and add those in.

Appreciate the feedback! :)
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)

BARBARIAN (Civilization)

#56 (40 points, nominated by nataeryn [12], Positronic Brain [19])
First Appearance: Civilization (Pictured: Civilization VI)


A unique NPC unit in the long-running sim series Civilization, barbarians exist to make the development of the player's society much more difficult. Their goal is simple: instead of building and sustaining civilization, they do the exact opposite. They can capture unguarded cities, stir discord to cause uprisings, attack your transports, and even surge out of a "goody" hut to ambush the player! Over the run of the series their mischief has grown, with Civ VI featuring the most devious iteration yet. In short, barbarians can make any playthrough sheer chaos at any moment.

Donors had the following to say:
gotta vote for the dudes that just want to pillage ~ nataeryn
How many civs have met their demise at their hands? ~ Positronic Brain
In the year 1994, from out of space comes a runaway planet, hurtling between the Earth and the Moon, unleashing Cosmic destruction.

This weekend will see a break from content, but we'll be back on Monday with more baddies and plotlines and excite!
 
Last edited:

Mogri

Round and round I go
(he)
Staff member
I got this one, fam.



By which I mean I literally own this statue. It's five feet from me. 2K sent it to me when I wrote a thing on GameFAQs for Civ Rev DS.
 

Falselogic

Techno-Threadcromancer
(they/them)
Barbarian from Civ is a great pick! I never would have thought of that. I hope someday they decide to get rid of the unit though. It's a pretty regressive view of how populations work, one mostly bolstered by outdated/incorrect 19th and early 20th century scholarship and worldviews.
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)
I got this one, fam.



By which I mean I literally own this statue. It's five feet from me. 2K sent it to me when I wrote a thing on GameFAQs for Civ Rev DS.
thax four visitz teh gift shoppe, purrson!
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)
oh hai

the dadz thoughts mightz bee fun for Finns to dos somz "did not makz it :( " posty. he sayed he is too buziness this weekenx butz the gifty shoppe are notz openz yet todai

so let Finns seez



The Shaving of ShagpatGeorge MeredithHonore GuilbeauSir Francis Meredith MeynellW.A. Dwiggins787/1500
24​
5​
1955​
260​

shagpatz is the underwing of Meredeath, ands are using shavers to threatenz teh honorable Guilbeau. The Maynails of Dwigging are teh "heroz" who fights shagpatz.

this have allz teh differents votez...why these not make list?
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)

*
MIMIC (Prey [2017])

#55 (41 points, nominated by Johnny Unusual [22], Dr. Nerd [9])
First Appearance: Prey


Mimics are a member of the Typhon, an alien race within the world of Prey. They are experts at camouflage and can transform themselves into a mirror image of an object, such as a coffee cup, a dirt skiff, or any number of other items. This makes exploration for the "hero" difficult, as anything could be an enemy in waiting. When a target gets close, they revert to their original form -- a black semi-solid creature with amazing mobility -- to deliver either a tentacle down the throat and consuming the nutrients of its host to replicate itself, or a fatal sting that could transform the victim into another type of Typhon, weavers.

Donors had the following to say:
I think this is probably the best-executed example of the archeyptical monster that usually infests tabletop adventures. The enemy AI will dynamically shape-change into numerous mundane items from the environments, and wait to stalk and ambush you. In practice, that means you will probably smash everything in a paranoid frenzy until you get better ways to identify them later in the game. ~ Dr. Nerd
Love of two is one
Here but now they're gone


* = Fuck Jeremy Soule
 
Last edited:

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)
If a YT video isn't working properly as an embed, right click on its title and you can listen to it on YT itself. I spent 15 minutes cycling through videos and none of them worked for the first vid, sorry!
 

Lokii

It's always time for burgers
(He/Him)
Staff member
Moderator
I think this is probably the best-executed example of the archeyptical monster that usually infests tabletop adventures.
Wrong because none of them in prey look like treasure chests
 

Dracula

Posts: 52,928
(He/His)
Do the prey mimics have big licking tongues? A mimic without such a tongue is forfeit, an abomination before God
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)


CLICKER (The Last of Us)

#54 (42 points, nominated by Issun [24], nataeryn [6])
First Appearance: The Last of Us


Clickers are an advanced form of the Infected taking over the world via the Cordyceps Brain Infection in The Last of Us universe. Clickers have lost any sense of sight from the fungal growth covering their face but are much more sensitive to sound, using their echolocation to track prey and their sharp teeth and increased strength to kill. For "the hero", clickers are incredibly tense encounters because they will instantly eviscerate the player if they get too close, and melee weapons and many guns are not super effective against them. The best way to take them out is to stealth kill them, but failing puts the player into a fatal situation. A curious oversight in the original game's AI allows NPC characters to run around and not necessarily catch the clicker's attention, suggesting that the player is all that matters in the end.

Donors had the following to say:
The sound effect combined with instant-death level of threat makes these guys make my heart race. I hate that clicking sound effect in a dark room. ~ nataeryn
So needless to say
I'm odds and ends
But I'll be stumbling away
Slowly learning that life is okay
Say after me
It's no better to be safe than sorry


 

Issun

Could be a fren
My first showing!

For how ubiquitous zombies are in games very few of them are memorable. Clickers are one such exception.
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
Do the prey mimics have big licking tongues? A mimic without such a tongue is forfeit, an abomination before God
They kind of look like Venom, so they’re basically 5 tongues, if tongues skittered around like spiders in your mouth and had poison barbs
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)

PERSEPHONE (Castlevania)

#53 (42 points, nominated by Octopus Prime [18], Rascally Badger [12])
First Appearance: Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow


Persephone is a demonic maid that serves Dracula. Similar to the maid enemy in Akumajō Dracula (X68000)/Castlevania Chronicles (which I counted as a separate entry), Persephone either engages with "the hero" by unleashing a devastating flurry of martial arts or by attacking with a sentient and vile looking vacuum cleaner that bites its target. Her incredible politeness when encountering the player in Aria stands out, as she curtsys and says "Yokoso" (welcome) before adopting a fighting stance and kicking at Soma Cruz. A little trick on the act of the developers, showing that even the cleaning staff will take on the "hero" to protect Dracula.

She grown sae fu and she couldn't a boo
 

Torzelbaum

????? LV 13 HP 292/ 292
(he, him, his)
The mouths on those vacuums aren't really that little.

I had Persephone on my long list of candidates but I cut her from my final list because it already had reps from the Castlevania series and I wanted to make room for enemies from other games / series.

I assume they use Dirt Devils?
...
 

WildcatJF

I will not be stopping
(he / his / him)

EGGPLANT WIZARD (Kid Icarus)

#52 (44 points, nominated by WildcatJF [14], Ixo [14])
First Appearance: Kid Icarus


Lurking deep inside the depths of Angel Land lurk the goofy yet devastating Eggplant Wizards, sentient anthropomorphic vegetable warlocks capable of casting replicas of their namesake that turn "the hero" into a walking eggplant. The only cure is hunting down the wayward nurses hiding within the labyrinth and getting the antidote to de-eggplant yourself. In Uprising, Eggplant Wizards returned alongside Tempura Wizards, who perform the same action but as a far more crispy equivalent. While slightly outclassed by their crunchy cousins, they did receive an excellent redesign:



The Ultimate Warp Zone!
 
Last edited:

Lokii

It's always time for burgers
(He/Him)
Staff member
Moderator
The OG manual illustration is also very good.



Look at him trying to spin on his finger. This isn't the NBA, eggy!
 

Dracula

Posts: 52,928
(He/His)
I dunno why this wasn't on my list! Eggplant Wizards are just the worst! When Kid Dracula would play Kid Icarus, he'd sooner run from them than risk the curse of the eggplant. I'd often plot roundabout ways through the dungeons just to avoid them. But some can't be avoided. And they're nearly always placed in locations that make them hard to attack, but easy to be attacked by, and their flying vegetable projectiles move faster than lil' Pit can dodge. You have to have a mixture of luck and skill to get past them.

They remind me a lot of Wallmasters from Zelda, in that the penalty from their attack isn't just loss of health, but loss of progress. When you're an eggplant, you can't attack, and the only cure for the status is by visiting the dungeon's nurse. The nurse doesn't cost money, but you do have to locate her. And if you get eggplant'd before you know where the nurse is, that means you need to be exploring and mapping out the game's most dangerous levels without any of your weapons. It's really stressful! And that's what makes them so memorable.
 
Top