Absurd Extracts: What Is the "Best" Post?

[RT-55J]

This person feels like they're talking to someone in a mirror they're mistaking for a window.

 

[muteKi]

Spoiler: this one's got some weird sexual stuff going on in it

$12.76 / $12.77?


I won't even acknowledge a short's existence for $12.77.


At $1000 a share, I'll allow a short to lick the bottoms of my boots clean after I've just walked through a freshly shat upon cow pasture.


At $100,000 a share, I'll allow them to have an opportunity to get to know themselves much better while they attempt to attain true enlightenment as they take a shower while a large fellow with an attitude you couldn't knock down with a hammer keeps whispering in their ear: "Oh, Nancy, Oh, Nancy."


At $1,000,000 a share, naked and on all fours they may come crawling into my office and politely ask, "sir - may I please purchase your shares," before they are unable to speak as they become completely engaged with ass to mouth.

$12.77 just doesn't tickle my pickle. Wake me when the situation gets interesting.

 

[Torzelbaum]

Do these people not understand how the stock market works? I hardly know anything but I do know that those are ridiculously high prices that are only obtained by the rarest of companies.

 

[muteKi]

You are correct, none of these people understand how the stock market works. They've managed to numerology their way into thinking the share price from may and a crank 10 billion dollar filing mean they're going to be paid at 12.77 a share. Even though shares are worthless

 

[muteKi]

To know, to freeze the frame for a fleeting moment, and to know you’re three acts into the four part play of a lifetime is akin to watching a canvas seemingly paint itself to slowly reveal a masterpiece beyond words. While each of us holds the brush, none of us could predict the beauty we would create.

To have witnessed the evolution from pre sneeze Wallstreetbets all the way through to ThePPShow has been a gift unto itself and one you will look back on with unmitigated awe.

It’ll be impossible to put into words exactly what was accomplished here. It won’t be captured by the metrics with which we’re taught to measure success, it won’t be condensed into a two hour film, it won’t be understood by those who didn’t live it and it will never be forgotten by those who did.

The essence of this indescribable, serendipitous, inexplicable, unpredictable and unstoppable force is a kind of lightning in a bottle that could never be engineered by even the greatest of minds but could only grow organically from the fertile ground of the collective unconscious.

To know you’re in it, as it’s happening, well that’s something you might never experience again. I implore you all to stop everything you’re doing, inhale deeply, and take a mental photograph of this very moment. You earned it.

A wise man once said,
“The best time
In Human History
To be alive
Is now”

#BBBYQ

 

[q 3]

maybe the real dividend was friendship

 

[Torzelbaum]

maybe the real dividend was friendship

Which is tax free!

 

[lincolnic]

Which is tax free!

Until your friend asks you to help them move.

 

[muteKi]

I'm watching The Famous PP Show, and I can’t believe how great things are going for the community. The Haters (and Manic Melturds) are trying to take me out to shut down the PP Show, but I have bad news for them: PP Community ain’t goin nowhere.

 

[Ludendorkk]

Spoiler: High-level tumblr brainworms

 

[estragon]

It sounds like they took the concept of "found family" a little too literally.

 

[q 3]

There is a large graveyard filled with my enemies.

I do not wish to add to it, but will if given no choice.

Those who pick fights with me do so at their own peril, but maybe this is their lucky day …

 

[muteKi]

WTF, Reddit? This is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE! Why in the world would you shut down r/theppshow? It was the lifeline for many of us in the BBBYQ/DK-Butterfly stock community. Are you trying to SILENCE US because we were uncovering truths you don’t want us to discuss? This is blatant CENSORSHIP and I'm not going to stand for it.
I DEMAND an immediate explanation from the Reddit admins! We, the users, have every right to know why our community was abruptly taken away. If this was about a few rule-breakers, then deal with them individually! Why punish the whole group for the actions of a few? This is just lazy moderation and a cowardly way to handle the situation. This isn’t just about some subreddit – it's about our fundamental right to free speech and the exchange of information! I am absolutely FURIOUS and I know I'm not alone in this. We need to band together and DEMAND answers. This type of random and unjust censorship is completely intolerable.
We need r/theppshow reinstated, or at the very least, a proper, detailed explanation for its ban. This is not the end of this – we WILL be heard!

 

[Exposition Owl]

I assume that, if I asked what in the world "BBBYQ/DK-Butterfly" meant, I'd probably regret it, right?

 

[RT-55J]

the first for letters stand for Bed, Bath, and Beyond. the meaning of the other letters is left to the imagination of the reader (read: i refuse to do any research on this subject for my own health)

 

[muteKi]

BBBYQ is the stock ticker for the company, having sold its branding and entered bankruptcy. DK-butterfly is the name the company takes now that BB&B as a name is owned by overstock

anyway the guy they're talking about, the guy who the sub and livestream is named after, was a big safemoon shill, if that helps you understand why the guys who are claiming to still be invested in a bankrupt company are looking to this guy for some kind of leadership

 

[q 3]

It's basically a cult except instead of the rapture the thing they keep predicting and then postponing is the day that wall street jesus will give each of the faithful a billion dollars worth of bitcoin

 

[ThornGhost]

Deeply disappointed it's not a reference to Y2K era dance hit and DDR staple Smile.dk - Butterfly.

 

[muteKi]

I bought these books to read to my boys, The grammar is terrible, the story doesn't flow, so i just read them to myself. I will probably buy the 2nd set.

 

[Exposition Owl]

Comma splices and incorrect pluralizations are strictly for readers ages 18 and up.

 

[Felicia]

What's wrong with AI art? It removes the skill needed and makes a level of creative expression otherwise locked behind that open to more people. I know it's not as high quality as real art, but is fast food art.

They say "fast food art" as if that's a good thing.

 

[RT-55J]

i would much rather eat fast food than AI generated food

 

[muteKi]

Let's talk ERPs – those mysterious three letters buzzing around the GME universe. ERP stands for Enterprise Resource Planning, but let's not get bogged down in the boring technical jargon. Think of it as GME's secret sauce for running the show efficiently.

Picture this: GME is a massive gaming kingdom with different departments – from the royal court of finance to the knights of inventory management. An ERP is like the wise old wizard overseeing it all, a powerful software system ensuring everyone in the GME realm is on the same page. It's the mastermind behind the scenes, tracking everything from inventory levels (how many shields and swords are in stock) to financial transactions (how much gold is in the treasure chest).

So, when RC dropped that tweet mentioning SAP, he was basically saying, 'Hey apes, we're upgrading our wizardry software to make our gaming kingdom even more formidable.' It's like getting a dragon upgrade in the middle of a boss fight – game-changing stuff.

Industrial Metaverse Magic: In our world – the Industrial Metaverse – this ERP magic extends beyond gaming. It's the key to streamlining operations, boosting productivity, and ensuring everything runs smoother than a GME rocket taking off.

In a nutshell, ERP is the unsung hero, the Gandalf of business software, helping GME and other kingdoms in the Industrial Metaverse conquer their challenges and level up their game. Now, let's dive deeper into the GME saga and uncover how this ERP upgrade is set to make waves in our digital adventure.

 

[Felicia]

That sounds like something that could provide additional slurp juices!

 

[muteKi]

I dont need to beg you for an apology, as I am at peace regarfing (sic) my conduct. You need to beg yourself for even the ability to issue one.

 

[RT-55J]

What a coincidence! I am also at peace regarfing my conduct.

 

[muteKi]

I'm always at peace regarfing my conduct. Some days, however, are mondays

 

[Exposition Owl]

Pfft. That guy has to regarf his content? Amateur. All my content is garfed correctly the first time.

 

[Johnny Unusual]

No. NO! TOO MUCH REGARFING!

 

[Issun]

The last Mefroid is in captivity. The regarfing is at peace.