Purple
(She/Her)
So the other night I started watching the original Superman movie because it was on a thing, and I fell asleep really early on not so much because it was boring as because my health is really scary bad right now, but before I did, I got to the part where they tease the villains from Superman 2 with this trial scene, and two things really jump out at me about that as super damn odd:
1- OK so like, when is this happening in relation to the whole bit with Jor-El realizing the whole planet is going to explode soon and making plans to put his baby in a space walnut? Because the way it's edited it feels like this is the same day, and they're really dragging it out with a lot of speeches and such. You'd figure he'd want to hurry things along so he has more time with his family before he dies. Or, you know, he'd totally blow off work that day, because what could possibly be less important than criminal sentencing when you know everyone's gonna die in a few hours? Also wait does Zod know everyone's gonna die? Is that what's up with the "hey why don't you hop into the Phantom Zone too?" bit? Because like... I understand it sucks but that actually doesn't seem like the worst emergency evacuation plan? Better than putting one naked baby in a space walnut with nothing but a gaudy blanket and some books on tape?
2- So there's sentencing for these 3 and the horrible crimes against Kryptanity they're all respnonsible for right? And like, indulge me here, I'm gonna straight up quote the script on these. Skipping around of course too so I can lead off with Zod. Zod is pretty straightforward:
OK, so he's getting P-zoned for being a supervillain and trying to take over the world. Pretty good reason. Next we got Non. And no I didn't know the other two's names either before checking the script.
So like, he's Gamel from Kamen Rider OOO then? Just... a big dumb guy who likes to smash things? Feels like this is kind of a harsh sentence. You could just like... set him up in a demolition yard or something, let him get those urges out productively, but, I dunno, your whole planet seems to be made of radioactive brittle crystals and maybe not have a real atmosphere, so, I can see how this could be worse. Not gonna judge your ways as an outsider. But then we've got Ursa.
So... she's gay. She is being sent to the phantom zone for the unforgivable crime of being a lesbian. And like, double checking against the sequel where we have the amazing exchange "you... can have whatever you like." "Some men. To kill." I guess we're "justifying" that by saying she's one of them real hardcore man-hatin' lesbians who says "kill all men" and really means it, but... I don't think that actually makes this any better.
Just thought I would share that with everyone. Oh and here's the scene.
1- OK so like, when is this happening in relation to the whole bit with Jor-El realizing the whole planet is going to explode soon and making plans to put his baby in a space walnut? Because the way it's edited it feels like this is the same day, and they're really dragging it out with a lot of speeches and such. You'd figure he'd want to hurry things along so he has more time with his family before he dies. Or, you know, he'd totally blow off work that day, because what could possibly be less important than criminal sentencing when you know everyone's gonna die in a few hours? Also wait does Zod know everyone's gonna die? Is that what's up with the "hey why don't you hop into the Phantom Zone too?" bit? Because like... I understand it sucks but that actually doesn't seem like the worst emergency evacuation plan? Better than putting one naked baby in a space walnut with nothing but a gaudy blanket and some books on tape?
2- So there's sentencing for these 3 and the horrible crimes against Kryptanity they're all respnonsible for right? And like, indulge me here, I'm gonna straight up quote the script on these. Skipping around of course too so I can lead off with Zod. Zod is pretty straightforward:
Once trusted by this Council, charged with maintaining the defenses of the planet Krypton itself - the chief architect of this intended revolution, the author of this insidious plot to establish a new order among Us - with himself as absolute ruler.
OK, so he's getting P-zoned for being a supervillain and trying to take over the world. Pretty good reason. Next we got Non. And no I didn't know the other two's names either before checking the script.
On this mindless aberration whose only means of expression are wanton violence and destruction....
So like, he's Gamel from Kamen Rider OOO then? Just... a big dumb guy who likes to smash things? Feels like this is kind of a harsh sentence. You could just like... set him up in a demolition yard or something, let him get those urges out productively, but, I dunno, your whole planet seems to be made of radioactive brittle crystals and maybe not have a real atmosphere, so, I can see how this could be worse. Not gonna judge your ways as an outsider. But then we've got Ursa.
On the woman, URSA, whose perversions and unreasoning hatred of men have finally threatened even the male children on our planet....
So... she's gay. She is being sent to the phantom zone for the unforgivable crime of being a lesbian. And like, double checking against the sequel where we have the amazing exchange "you... can have whatever you like." "Some men. To kill." I guess we're "justifying" that by saying she's one of them real hardcore man-hatin' lesbians who says "kill all men" and really means it, but... I don't think that actually makes this any better.
Just thought I would share that with everyone. Oh and here's the scene.