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SMASH BROS THREAD
- Thread starter BEAT
- Start date
A three minute presentation...
3 Minutes....
If you turn a 3 on its side, it becomes, essentially, a W...
And W is the emblem of Wario...
And Wario is the best friend of Waluigi...
So this is clearly a coded message telling us that the next announced Smash Bros character will be...
This is my belief! At least for now.
3 Minutes....
If you turn a 3 on its side, it becomes, essentially, a W...
And W is the emblem of Wario...
And Wario is the best friend of Waluigi...
So this is clearly a coded message telling us that the next announced Smash Bros character will be...
This is my belief! At least for now.
Based on the DLC character track record so far, there is a very good chance I would like this more than whatever is actually announced.
Pajaro Pete
(He/Himbo)
stardew valley farmer is coming!
I'll admit, it'd be nice for Toad to be something other than a princess shield in Smash.
If it happens I want Toadette to be an Echo Fighter and not just a skin or two for Toad. I mean there's like five different Toad colors, the standard red cap blue violet vest Toad, Captain Toad, and Blue Toad with Glasses. Give Toadette her own spot with her own alternate outfits and Final Smash if you include her too.
If it happens I want Toadette to be an Echo Fighter and not just a skin or two for Toad. I mean there's like five different Toad colors, the standard red cap blue violet vest Toad, Captain Toad, and Blue Toad with Glasses. Give Toadette her own spot with her own alternate outfits and Final Smash if you include her too.
Toad AND Toadette, together, like the antithesis of the Ice Climbers.
Yeah, for all we know the new fighter could be a random deku scrub or something.
The last time we saw a non-Nintendo character was Terry, who was announced 7,000 years ago. Since then we've had two featured Nintendo franchises, so I am jonesin' for something outside the usual. That said, my most cynical expectation is simply a next gen pokemon or pokemon trainer.
My gut says the Champions from BotW, since Age of Calamity is coming out shortly and they need more eyes on that
There are many good and cool characters you could guess for the next fighter. Who should get in is a question with literally thousands of right answers, AND 6 WRONG ONES!
Who might those 6 wrong answers be? I'M GLAD YOU ASKED!!!
TRACER
Blizzard's given us a lot over the years. Things like Lootboxes as gambling, MMOs as an addiction, Esports as sweatshops, gold farming, always-online DRM for single player games, terms of service that assert ownership of player-created content and retroactively forcing said agreement on people who'd owned the game since 2003, taking away money from people who'd already earned it because they said free "Hong Kong," and giving Agonizingly fake apologies for almost half of that shit. But does the company that famously waited for Overwatch 2 to add a black woman to the cast then bragged about how woke they were REALLY deserve to a smash bros Rep? Of course not! Fuck Blizzard fuck Tracer and fuck you if you disagree!
EZIO
The first Assassin's creed famously opened with a statement that the game was designed by "a multicultural team of various beliefs and faiths", which was later updated to "various beliefs, sexual orientations and gender identities." Unfortunately the upper management profiting off those teams was an old boys club that fostered a legendarily toxic work environment rife with sexual harassment, exploitation and racism. Weird how that keeps happening, right?
STEVE?
Nowadays we all know that Minecraft came from space. Unfortunately, the guy who found it, (presumably smoldering in the center of a perfectly-circular crater somewhere in the desert) told everyone that it was totally his invention that he definitely didn't rip off of Infiniminer, and used it to gain incredible wealth and fame before selling it for more money than he could ever spend. He then spent the next five years being an agressively transphobic dipshit, as he went about his business slowly dying alone in a mansion full of worthless money and (presumably) prescription drugs. And while he wouldn't PERSONALLY benefit from the little voxel dude with the dumb blocky head and obvious developer placeholder textures that somehow never got replaced being in Smash, it seems like the sort of thing he'd reactivate his twitter to brag about, and I'm not willing to take that risk.
FORTNIGHT
Does Fortnight even have characters? I don't actually know if fortnight has Characters. I always just assumed they were all just custom-avatars that you needed to pay actual money to make them look how you want, which is why they're currently running an actual fucking propaganda campaign against Apple to try and trick actual elementary schoolers into thinking that picking a side between two multi-billion dollar corporations is "Activism". Frankly, they can both go fuck themselves.
SORA
Fun fact: Kingdom Hearts isn't owned by Square! It's entirely the property of the Walt Disney Corporation! Those guys just LOVE crossovers, with the tiny little caveat that they own every single thing being crossed over. Wouldn't it be cool if the guys who forcefully tore all the Final Fantasy out of the series that was literally conceived as "the game where Donald Duck can meet some Final Fantasies" was able to wrap one of their insidious tendrils around Sakurai's neck? I bet they definitely wouldn't live up to their decades-long reputation of being horrible monopolistic control freaks to seek grim ends!
ANYONE ELSE FROM PERSONA
I just really fuckin hate that series.
Who might those 6 wrong answers be? I'M GLAD YOU ASKED!!!
TRACER
Blizzard's given us a lot over the years. Things like Lootboxes as gambling, MMOs as an addiction, Esports as sweatshops, gold farming, always-online DRM for single player games, terms of service that assert ownership of player-created content and retroactively forcing said agreement on people who'd owned the game since 2003, taking away money from people who'd already earned it because they said free "Hong Kong," and giving Agonizingly fake apologies for almost half of that shit. But does the company that famously waited for Overwatch 2 to add a black woman to the cast then bragged about how woke they were REALLY deserve to a smash bros Rep? Of course not! Fuck Blizzard fuck Tracer and fuck you if you disagree!
EZIO
The first Assassin's creed famously opened with a statement that the game was designed by "a multicultural team of various beliefs and faiths", which was later updated to "various beliefs, sexual orientations and gender identities." Unfortunately the upper management profiting off those teams was an old boys club that fostered a legendarily toxic work environment rife with sexual harassment, exploitation and racism. Weird how that keeps happening, right?
STEVE?
Nowadays we all know that Minecraft came from space. Unfortunately, the guy who found it, (presumably smoldering in the center of a perfectly-circular crater somewhere in the desert) told everyone that it was totally his invention that he definitely didn't rip off of Infiniminer, and used it to gain incredible wealth and fame before selling it for more money than he could ever spend. He then spent the next five years being an agressively transphobic dipshit, as he went about his business slowly dying alone in a mansion full of worthless money and (presumably) prescription drugs. And while he wouldn't PERSONALLY benefit from the little voxel dude with the dumb blocky head and obvious developer placeholder textures that somehow never got replaced being in Smash, it seems like the sort of thing he'd reactivate his twitter to brag about, and I'm not willing to take that risk.
FORTNIGHT
Does Fortnight even have characters? I don't actually know if fortnight has Characters. I always just assumed they were all just custom-avatars that you needed to pay actual money to make them look how you want, which is why they're currently running an actual fucking propaganda campaign against Apple to try and trick actual elementary schoolers into thinking that picking a side between two multi-billion dollar corporations is "Activism". Frankly, they can both go fuck themselves.
SORA
Fun fact: Kingdom Hearts isn't owned by Square! It's entirely the property of the Walt Disney Corporation! Those guys just LOVE crossovers, with the tiny little caveat that they own every single thing being crossed over. Wouldn't it be cool if the guys who forcefully tore all the Final Fantasy out of the series that was literally conceived as "the game where Donald Duck can meet some Final Fantasies" was able to wrap one of their insidious tendrils around Sakurai's neck? I bet they definitely wouldn't live up to their decades-long reputation of being horrible monopolistic control freaks to seek grim ends!
ANYONE ELSE FROM PERSONA
I just really fuckin hate that series.
Random guesses / wishful thinking:
Ryu or Nina from the Breath of Fire series : Ryu could morph or summon dragons for some of his specials. Nina could turn into a phoenix for her Final.
Someone from Chrono Trigger : But if they did include somone it would probably be Crono.
Shovel Knight : Could do all sorts of BS with his subweapons.
Someone from Kunio-Kun/River City : The girls had their recent game and probably don't have any IP right malarkey to deal with so they would be a nice choice.
A character from NES Pro Wrestling
A composite character from NES Track & Field 1 & 2: If we can have Wii Fit Trainer and Ring Fit Lady then why not? Could incorporate the Power Pad* for the Final Smash.
Lara Croft : She's had some recent games and they put Bayonetta in so why not?
*It's so Pad.
Ryu or Nina from the Breath of Fire series : Ryu could morph or summon dragons for some of his specials. Nina could turn into a phoenix for her Final.
Someone from Chrono Trigger : But if they did include somone it would probably be Crono.
Shovel Knight : Could do all sorts of BS with his subweapons.
Someone from Kunio-Kun/River City : The girls had their recent game and probably don't have any IP right malarkey to deal with so they would be a nice choice.
A character from NES Pro Wrestling
A composite character from NES Track & Field 1 & 2: If we can have Wii Fit Trainer and Ring Fit Lady then why not? Could incorporate the Power Pad* for the Final Smash.
Lara Croft : She's had some recent games and they put Bayonetta in so why not?
*It's so Pad.
That's ridiculous. We all know it was a perfectly square crater.
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Becksworth
Aging Hipster Dragon Dad
Might I nominate Quote/Curly Brace to the list of bad choices? On one hand yes, Cave Story, while not the first indie PC game, it is the first real indie game darling that had a major role in shaping that part of the industry, so if any indie game character were to make it to Smash as a full character, they seem like a good choice. On the other hand, the original creator transferred rights to the IP over to Nicalis, which is ran by a racist, abusive asshole who shamelessly exploits the IPs he can get a hold of for crossover money all the time, and does he really need more?
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Violentvixen
(She/Her)
I submitted five that seem kind of feasible, but wanted to list Flammie from Secret/Trials of Mana. Wouldn't really make sense but would be fun.
My guesses:
Dante from Devil May Cry
Ryu Hayabusa
Bandana Waddle Dee
Nabbit
Paul Rudd (from the Zelda commercial)
Dante from Devil May Cry
Ryu Hayabusa
Bandana Waddle Dee
Nabbit
Paul Rudd (from the Zelda commercial)
Pajaro Pete
(He/Himbo)
i can't believe they're adding pocky from hit top down shooter pocky and rocky as a dlc character to promote pocky and rocky returns, coming 2021
Just Crono would be pretty boring. If they did Chrono Trigger in Smash, personally I would want an Ice Climbers or Pokémon Trainer style team-up. Like, have Crono with two other party members.
Ideally, everybody (who's not Magus*) could team up with Crono for attacks and the Final Smash would be different depending on party composition, but if you must have a limited party or can't use Ayla 'cuz ratings or whatever then go for Crono/Lucca/Robo or Crono/Lucca/Frog or Crono/Lucca/Marle.
Don't do Crono/Frog/Robo and then only have the girls there as spirit battles or Mii Fighter outfits.
Really though, we can't seem to get a non-crappy looking modern rerelease of the game and the Chrono series has so far avoided the Brave Exvius gacha fodder dumping grounds where every other series SquEnix knows you're nostalgic for ends up so I don't have much faith in Chrono Trigger happening in Smash.
* This is nothing against Magus, it's just that he doesn't have any dual tech moves with the rest of the cast and only teams up for a couple of rock-based triple techs. Guy would work better as an assist trophy or boss fight.
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While my gut still says the BotW champions, I've also gotten message from Nintendo celebrating milestones for DOnkey Kong and Dragalia Lost over the last couple days.
So... maybe thems?
So... maybe thems?
