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Movie Time 2.0: TT mini reviews


Unfortunate doesn't begin to describe...
You Are So Not Invited to my Bar Mitzvah

Why do my middle-aged parents seem to like the most bland and generic teen dramas??
Finished up Kingdom of Heaven's extended cut last night. The very middle still felt like a lot happening in a hurry despite the extension (I assume in the theatrical these things just mostly don't even happen), but the pacing levelled out again for the last 40 minutes or so. Things got a little cheesy and movie-symbolic-ey towards the end, which didn't gel that well with the somewhat awkward aim of balancing a Last Stand type scenario against the wish to make the besiegers the good guys to such a great degree. When everyone is a good guy but they can't talk it out until they waste hundreds of lives first, it jars a bit. Still, some good siege-ey action and it wraps up well enough. Just in time for a last-minute Jorah-from-GoT appearance as Richard the Lionheart very briefly, to further pad the cast of recognisable faces!
Tough Guys Don't Dance (1987)
America's Best Known Author [Norman Mailer] brings you the years most controversial movie

I picked up Tough Guys Don't Dance from Vinegar Syndrome. Its a blu ray distributor best known for releasing action, horror, and exploitation movies. Tough Guys Don't Dance was originally produced by The Cannon Group known for over the top horror and action movies like Lifeforce and Deathish 3 (Note: Deathwish 3 is an insane action movie).

Tough Guys Don't Dance is a mystery drama. It seems like an odd choice for both Vinegar Syndrome and The Cannon Group. Maybe a prestige picture for both companies?

The film begins with Tim Madden waking up to find his estranged father in his home and a body in his basement. The majority of the film is flashback scenes where Tim, who drinks heavily and snorts coke, is trying to remember whether or not he is the murderer. The film takes place in Provincetown, an oceanside town in Massachusetts, which is very atmospheric with gray sea fog blanketing the small town.

The film reminded me of Blue Velvet. The film takes the viewers through some seedier sides of American life. Drugs and sex are plentiful and there are moments of violence. Additionally, Isabella Rossellini is in the film and Angelo Badalamenti composed the score. The police chief, played by Wings Hauser, is the film's primary antagonist. The police chief is corrupt, unhinged, and the highlight of the film.

If you like mysteries or David Lynch films, I can recommend Tough Guys Don't Dance.

Rating (out of 5): 💀 💀 💀 1/2

Johnny Unusual

My bad habit of falling asleep during movies caught up with me again but I'll say this: the last half of Adalen 31 is a great movie. A 1969 Swedish film about a 1931 union riot starts as a more of slice of life romance as a working class teen falls for a rich girl but the last half is really about how awful strike breaking is as the police open fire on protesters. The last half is very effective stuff, a well-made, tense film. Strongly recommend it.
That sounds pretty interesting, added to the Watchlist and thanks for the rec!

Last night threw The Mule on. I think the core of it worked better than Cry Macho's fixation on replicating Gran Torino, but it kept letting itself down with laughable or tedious dialogue (Clint just really wants to show us that cool people use slurs and that's totes fine because he only means joking disrespect, over and over again apparently) or daft cartoonish plot developments or character choices that undermined his typical realism-fixated style. It's fine, but without all the problems it could've been properly good.

Rascally Badger

El Capitan de la outro espacio
I'm really waffling on Napoleon. The impressive scenes are really impressive. But I don't think the movie quite gets where it wants to be. Joaquin's and Vanessa Kirby's performances are great. However, I don't know how people with only a passing knowledge of Napoleon would be able to follow it. I've read quite a few Napoleon biographies and I was lost some of the time.

I really enjoyed watching it, but I don't expect to put it in my Top 10 at the end of the year.

Octopus Prime

Aqua Teen Hunger Force: Plantasm was an episode of ATHF that was much more narratively coherent and also about 7 times longer than usual. The animation was also vastly better but, like… that’s not much to brag about.

I enjoyed it! I can’t imagine someone who isn’t a fan of ATHF liking it, but I’m not such a person, so their opinions are not my own!


(He, Him)
Nah, movie was in 2007. They had seasons under various non hunger force names up through 2015ish.

I guess I should clarify I meant the older movie, not Plantasm, which I assumed just came out. That was confusing of me!
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Beta Metroid

At peace
Godzilla Minus One is harrowing, has some very refreshing setpieces for the series/genre, presents some very compelling main characters with a protagonist who goes through a brutal arc, and ultimately delivers a very satisfying message. Go see it on as big a screen as you can find!

Also, there was a kid who looked about 12 years old in my row who just went into full, hyper-enthusiastic dance mode in his seat when the classic theme kicked in. Very heartwarming to see.