• Welcome to Talking Time's third iteration! If you would like to register for an account, or have already registered but have not yet been confirmed, please read the following:

    1. The CAPTCHA key's answer is "Percy"
    2. Once you've completed the registration process please email us from the email you used for registration at percyreghelper@gmail.com and include the username you used for registration

    Once you have completed these steps, Moderation Staff will be able to get your account approved.

  • TT staff acknowledge that there is a backlog of new accounts that await confirmation.

    Unfortunately, we are putting new registrations on hold for a short time.

    We do not expect this delay to extend beyond the first of November 2020, and we ask you for your patience in this matter.

    ~TT Moderation Staff

Movie Time 2.0: TT mini reviews

I watched Army of the Dead. Its pretty middling. There are some aspects that I like about it, but I didn't love it. The film is 2+ hours long and does not need to be anywhere near that long.
 

Mightyblue

aggro table, shmaggro table
(He/Him/His)
From all accounts it appears to be a lazy rehash of Aliens too, plot and structure-wise.
 
Yes. Red Letter Media has a review of the film and they juxtapose Army of the Dead and Aliens. Some definite rehashing.

Oh I forgot the licensed music for the movie is so on the nose it hurts. Viva Las Vegas, the End, and Zombie are played.

For grins I looked up Zach Snyders' filmography on IMDB. He has done a lot of DCU movies including Justice League and Zach Snyder's Justice League. Outside of Dawn of the Dead remake and Watchman, there is not a lot in his filmography that appeals to me.

I like the Dawn of the Dead remake which makes the blandness of Army of the Dead a bit more frustrating.
 

Sprite

(He/Him/His)
So, Cruella.

It is a great movie to watch in a room full of gay men when you are also a gay man. A thoroughly campy movie featuring arch, angry women making each other miserable. It’s not... great, but it is exactly what I expected, and in fact wanted.

Early on, I groaned (major spoilers), ”Her mom’s going to die, isn’t she?” And my husband joked (seriously don’t read this if you plan to watch it), ”Maybe her mother’ll get killed by dalmatians.” AND THEN SHE TOTALLY WAS! I’ve never laughed at a parent’s death in a movie before, but the sheer absurdity of it had me on the floor. I still can’t believe they went there. It is delightfully, terribly stupid. Holy freaking crap.

Emma Thompson is perfection, and fully understands what movie she’s in. She chews scenery with gusto. The costume design is genuinely incredible and feels straight out of a punk drag act. The whole thing is incredibly silly and I truly enjoyed it.

I appreciate that Cruella is at no point a good person. She starts neutral at best, then gets worse. The movie tries - and fails - to make you sympathize with her, but she really is just a reprehensible human being who happens to be slightly less evil than the antagonist. She’s a different character from the original - no real interest in furs or murdering animals - but still unscrupulous and cruel. You know, if that’s your thing.

So, yeah. I don’t think I’d recommend spending $30 on it, but if you like the idea of watching Team Rocket take down Doronjo, or just love watching a movie revel in its own camp, it’s worth a watch when it eventually goes on regular Disney+.

Though... be ready for some incredibly distracting CG dogs. Seriously, they look so bad.
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
Death Ship is an early 80s horror movie that dared to ask the question of "What if The Shining was on a boat, extremely boring and starred George Kennedy." And besides compelling people to murder, the ghosts were also nazis.

A yacht is crashed into by an evil ghost ship fulla ghost nazis, and nobody who survives seems very troubled by any of that, or the fact that the ghost ship fulla ghost nazis is sentient and trying to kill people. They all process their grief incredibly quickly. They seemingly only had enough film shot to fill 30 of the movies 100 minutes, so all the rest is stock footage of a boats engine, empty rooms, and nazi propaganda.

The only point in the movie where anyone seems troubled by all the murder ghosts on a nazi cruise ship is when a lady is taking a shower and all the water turns to blood and, honestly, at that point she's really OVER reacting. I was genuinely unsure if she was supposed to be drowning and the movie didn't convey that.
 
So, Cruella.

It’s not... great

That is how I felt: its not great. Its not bad, but its not great.

From Disneys own synopsis of the film: Cruella, which is set in 1970s London amidst the punk rock revolution, follows a young grifter named Estella, a clever and creative girl determined to make a name for herself with her designs.

Something about Disney using the punk rock revolution as part of their big streaming movie feels odd to me.

The movie is also 2 hours and 14 minutes. I think there is enough story in Cruella for maybe 90 minutes.

I didn't hate the movie. I think Sprite summarized the positives nicely. But I don't see myself watching this one again. For me Maleficent remains the strongest cartoon to live action movie Disney has made.
 

Bongo

excused from moderation duty
(he/him)
Staff member
Over the course of May, I watched all four parts of Sergei Bondarchuk’s War and Peace. Such artistry in these movies. If you’re rusty on the Napoleonic Wars you might want to brush up on some of the details before watching.

Hardly light entertainment, though. I think I will cool it on the historical war dramas for at least a couple weeks now.
 

Purple

(She/Her)
Earlier, I learned of the existence of some total trash OAV where at one point there is a Master Blaster riding on the back of a nude woman who is a robot, part-motorcycle, and breathes lasers. Asking around here, I learned this is called Goku: Midnight Eye (thanks Peklo!) and for some reason, it's available on Amazon Prime, wih the sort of emotionally dissonant weird old OAV dub you'd expect.

The second episode of two has a monologue from the main character which contains the following word for word quotation:
"If I wanted to, I could hack into the launch codes of every nuclear power, send the missiles up, and destroy the planet. In every other way, I'm just your ordinary private detective."
Shortly after explaining this, he's in a sewer pipe defending some woman from a swarm of robo-pterodactyls.

Also in the first episode, there is a scene where someone sets a trap to kill the protagonist, which I can only properly convey with a bunch of nested spoiler tags.
The hypnotic robo-stripper who has thus far killed every other character in the episode and attempted to kill our hero (who thwarted it by stabbing his own eye out by the way, which some mysterious unexplained benefactor then replaced with a magical internet eye giving him all knowledge, but we're not making any Odin references because he also gives him a power pole) mind controls his love interest so that she gives him a drugged drink.
Also, she has poisoned lipstick to kiss him with when he refuses.
Also this is basically just a distraction so a random Abobo can sneak up to crush his skull.
And as a contingency for when that fails, Abobo has a fez concealing dozens of poisonous robot mosquitos.
All of which chases him out of the building to be confronted again by the hypno-robo-stripper.
 

Pajaro Pete

(He/Himbo)
Sailor Moon Eternal The Movie Pt 1 and Pt 2: Kind of flops, honestly? Like yeah the stock footage transformations and attacks look pretty, but it has the same issue that late Sailor Moon always does: Too many characters who get one (1) character scene that feels completely disconnected from the rest of the story and then proceed to do nothing for the rest of the story arc besides repeat proper nouns and scream Sailor Moon's name. Like how much more impactful would the finale of Part 1 been if Minako's insecurity about not being the Cool Veteran Sailor Guardian anymore because of the Outers had been something that had been building all movie instead of something that popped up in the last 20 minutes? (Probably not a lot, but it would have been somewhat better)

The Mitchells versus The Machines: Sony Animation really is eating Disney's lunch huh. It was cute until I realized what song the main character was singing as a toddler with her father and then I instantly turned to dust. I was a bit worried at first it was going to be too "Technology.... BAD" but I guess it sort of comes down on the "Technology.... NEUTRAL, but can be BAD based on how it's used"?
 

Büge

Arm Candy
(she/her)
Earlier, I learned of the existence of some total trash OAV where at one point there is a Master Blaster riding on the back of a nude woman who is a robot, part-motorcycle, and breathes lasers. Asking around here, I learned this is called Goku: Midnight Eye (thanks Peklo!) and for some reason, it's available on Amazon Prime, wih the sort of emotionally dissonant weird old OAV dub you'd expect.

The second episode of two has a monologue from the main character which contains the following word for word quotation:
"If I wanted to, I could hack into the launch codes of every nuclear power, send the missiles up, and destroy the planet. In every other way, I'm just your ordinary private detective."
Shortly after explaining this, he's in a sewer pipe defending some woman from a swarm of robo-pterodactyls.

Also in the first episode, there is a scene where someone sets a trap to kill the protagonist, which I can only properly convey with a bunch of nested spoiler tags.
The hypnotic robo-stripper who has thus far killed every other character in the episode and attempted to kill our hero (who thwarted it by stabbing his own eye out by the way, which some mysterious unexplained benefactor then replaced with a magical internet eye giving him all knowledge, but we're not making any Odin references because he also gives him a power pole) mind controls his love interest so that she gives him a drugged drink.
Also, she has poisoned lipstick to kiss him with when he refuses.
Also this is basically just a distraction so a random Abobo can sneak up to crush his skull.
And as a contingency for when that fails, Abobo has a fez concealing dozens of poisonous robot mosquitos.
All of which chases him out of the building to be confronted again by the hypno-robo-stripper.
Frocto and Niku over on the Brontoforum did a lets watch of that

 

Paul le Fou

Pickle Bus Owns Tulip Town
(He)
I saw Raya and the Last Dragon the other night and have two takeaways:

1. Just absolutely, mind-bogglingly amazing animation and really nice visual design.

2. Everything else was extremely disappointing. Every character and story beat was straight out of the worst chapters of Disney's (if not Dreamworks's) most hackneyed, ham-fisted playbook. It somehow manages to feel whitewashed and orientalist even with an all-Asian cast of characters and actors.
 

Tegan

dirtbag lesbian
(She/Her)
I watched Pontypool and The Girl With All the Gifts today; I liked both of them. I don't have anything really clever to say about them, I'm just glad that I can finally watch zombie movies again. I tried to watch 28 Days Later at the start of the pandemic and just couldn't. Now nothing is holding me back from watching the, uh, rich, thriving genre of zombie cinema that definitely didn't wear out its welcome a decade ago.
 

Olli

(he/him)
A Promising Young Woman was really really good. The basic premise is that Carey Mulligan's character has an act where she lures opportunistic rapists into thinking she's too intoxicated to resist, but after they try to take advantage of her, she turns the tables on the "nice guy" attackers.

The movie wasn't perfectly executed perhaps - there are some plot details that feel a bit awkward in retrospect - but emotionally it's a slam dunk. When the end music started playing and the credits began rolling, my jaw was on the floor. The movie pulls no punches describing rape culture and its effects on women. I also liked how
the only man in the movie who has a little bit of good in him is the scumbag lawyer who's had a probably irreversible mental breakdown after realizing how much damage he has done
 

BEAT

LOUDSKULL
(DUDE/BRO)
GOD I miss these kinds of early 00s action flicks about assholes getting in over their heads and then fighting their way out with karate.
 
CRADLE 2 THE GRAVE IS ON NETFLIX AND I'M GONNA WATCH IT.

GOD I miss these kinds of early 00s action flicks about assholes getting in over their heads and then fighting their way out with karate.

Don't think I've ever seen it, but I do recall seeing Romeo Must Die when it came out, which from what I recall was set in France for some reason? But everyone spoke English for the most part at varying levels of comprehensibility. I mention it because Wikipedia informs me it was by the same director and also starred Jet Li and the late DMX, I should give it a watch.

I think Jet Li's The One un-ironically remains my favorite of these kinds of movies. I'm not saying it's some masterpiece, but it's a lot of dumb fun with it's over the top one liners, action and period appropriate music choices.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
2. Everything else was extremely disappointing. Every character and story beat was straight out of the worst chapters of Disney's (if not Dreamworks's) most hackneyed, ham-fisted playbook. It somehow manages to feel whitewashed and orientalist even with an all-Asian cast of characters and actors.

Well that sucks. I was really looking forward to that one! I suppose I'll probably still watch it someday for the visuals but I guess I won't be hunting it down quick now.
 
Watched 2 movies yesterday, both a lot better than I was expecting... King Kong (1976) is pretty funny. Had no idea it was going to be. Of the four leads (Jessica Lange, Jeff Bridges, Charles Grodin, Kong) only Bridges is served by some poor writing that makes his character mostly unintentionally annoying. 2021 is the year of me having a crush on Charles Grodin. (RIP) Kong's face is great. The island native stuff, well, really makes Peter Jackson's 2005 version seem even more indefensible on that front because it doesn't seem as jarringly bad. Not good, but, you know. Kong's end is absolutely grisly and his rampage is also horrifying in a way it isn't in the other versions I can remember. (well, just the 2005 one, I guess - can't remember Skull Island or the Toho standalone, and haven't seen the original in decades) That poor woman dressed like Lange!

Someone's Watching Me is a John Carpenter telemovie from 1978. Hadn't really heard much about it. Lauren Hutton as Leigh Michaels is a pretty great protagonist, though. Well written and very well performed. Also Adrienne Barbeau is a sympathetic lesbian and yes, the only sympathetic character we spend time with who dies, but still, didn't see the former coming. Pretty cool.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Fight, Zatoichi, Fight

Up to the eighth movie in the series and boy, is this action lite compared to the title, which has the word "fight" twice and as the bread in a name sandwich. But its not a bad one. Basically, a woman is killed in an attempted assassination on Ichi and Ichi must take the woman's baby to her husband many towns over. On his trip, he convinces a pickpocket to help with the parenting duties and then must find a new home for the baby when the actual dad is a piece of shit yakuza. Its a weird title to slap on this one when "Son of Zatoichi" was RIGHT THERE in terms of generic titles. But this is a decent enough one. Again, it is lacking in the interesting villain department and it ups the goofiness a little but Ichi remains a solid character to carry a movie.
 
Top