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Johnny Unusual Ate This - A near-weekly series of terrible mistakes

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Pooplets
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I'm less disturbed by the poop candy and more the way his thumb fits perfectly in his mouth in a way that is.... not safe for work.
This seems to be the same kind of candy as the DC ones I've been having recently. Weirdly, I can't place the flavour. Sadly, not poop. Too cowardly for that, aren't you, candy company. More like... generic sugar.
Snapple Fruit Punch Drink Mix

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Did not find any facts on the little packets.
Fruit Punch is a flavour I tend to find pleasant but I almost always wish I was having a more specific flavour.
Wakewater Peach
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I can't even be dehydrated because of wake.
Oh, God, this was terrible. Keep in mind, I like flavoured soda water but this tasted bitter and I could barely make out the peach. Worse there are two more of these and I'm a completionist.
Ruffles Double Crunch Zinger
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Not a complex euphemism.
As is often the case, chips with a meat flavour taste slightly different but almost all are good, not great and not much different than each other. There pieces had the bigger ridges and a bit of spice. Good but not unique to me.
Raspberry Delight
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Every week....
This is good. But rainbow delight is better. Not even because of my own blue raspberry biases. Rainbow was just really good.
Toblerone
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latest
A classic. I think this is the classic flavour but it's been so long, I wasn't prepared for the specifics of the stuff inside. (almond nugat). Still a recommend.
Airheads Watermelon
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A summery flavour
Yes, still good, if slightly gritty.
Mega Mints

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Fight, Megaman, for everlasting flavour.
Flavour is almost a too-light mint. But the shapes, which looks like those little E-cannisters, were really good looking.
Paw Patrol Gallo Gum (Tutti Frutti)

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Better than Dora but still not great. Managed to form it into gum much easier.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Tuesday

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Unicorn Lollipop
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I'd usually specify flavour but "birthday cake" seems to be the only flavour.

Snapple Mango Madness Drink Mix
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Strawberry Lemonade Fudge
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Oh, this is getting real soft in the heat. Probably should keep it in the fridge.

Covered Bridge Creamy Dill Pickle
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Covered Bridge is a local brand. Pretty decent. That said, Dill Pickle Chips are among my least favourite. Strong vinegary flavours without a counterpoint isn't my deal.

Spongebob Squarepants Gallo Gum
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WHY RASPBERRY? PINEAPPLE! PINEAPPLE IS SUCH THE OBVIOUS CHOICE. Or failing that, another yellow fruit.

Wakewater Blackberry
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Man, not interested. Peach was bad but somehow I feel like Blackberry will be worse, if there is a notable difference.

Blueberry Muffin Cotton Candy
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This could be good and no rapper to worry about... I assume.

Cherry Blossom
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This is a 130 year old Canadian chocolate treat. Too bad I don't really like maraschino cherries.

Maritime Madness Fierce Habanero
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I thought I had this but that was "classic habanero". Same spice level, though, I think.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Feel free to send any unwanted dill pickle stuff to me, I love me some dill flavor. I gotta find a more reliable source for dill pickle peanuts, those are great and healthier than chips…
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Unicorn Lollipop
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I'd usually specify flavour but "birthday cake" seems to be the only flavour.
The lolli itself isn't that great but the sweet powder dip has a tang to it. Still, it is messy.
Snapple Mango Madness Drink Mix
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Best of the Snapple Drink mix flavours hands down.
Strawberry Lemonade Fudge
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Oh, this is getting real soft in the heat. Probably should keep it in the fridge.
This was pretty decent. It had little chunks of dried strawberry, which is nice but I wish it had more.
Covered Bridge Creamy Dill Pickle
cjuBhvY.jpg

Covered Bridge is a local brand. Pretty decent. That said, Dill Pickle Chips are among my least favourite. Strong vinegary flavours without a counterpoint isn't my deal.
Not being a pickle fan, I was surprised how much I enjoyed this. The vinegary flavour is there but not too overpowering and a nice focus on the dill. That said, it was all "lightly" flavoured so if you want heavy pickle flavour, you might not get a lot out of this.
Spongebob Squarepants Gallo Gum
vpDyh0B.jpg

WHY RASPBERRY? PINEAPPLE! PINEAPPLE IS SUCH THE OBVIOUS CHOICE. Or failing that, another yellow fruit.
This one worked the best. It turned into gum real easy. Still, it got bitter pretty fast.
Wakewater Blackberry
1gM0oyH.jpg

Man, not interested. Peach was bad but somehow I feel like Blackberry will be worse, if there is a notable difference.
Just as bad as the other one but the slight blackberry aftertaste was very clear. But it's still bitter and not great.
Blueberry Muffin Cotton Candy
IEzNTfl.jpg

This could be good and no rapper to worry about... I assume.
This one didn't have a really notable taste, actually. Kind of a disappointment.
Cherry Blossom
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This is a 130 year old Canadian chocolate treat. Too bad I don't really like maraschino cherries.
Oh, I think I reviewed this before. Anyway, still decent enough but never my first choice. Just not a maraschino man.
Maritime Madness Fierce Habanero
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I thought I had this but that was "classic habanero". Same spice level, though, I think.
Hot and flavorful. Not unique but good stuff.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Wednesday

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Peach Penguins
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Admire the bravery to make the peach-flavoured candy not look like peach. For real, it feels like a friendly trick. You think you are getting licorice but it's peach!

Wakewater Cherry
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Thank god, the last one of these.

Covered Bridge Sea Salt & Vinegar
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I chose this because I'm trying to get the flavours I like least out of the way but I was impressed with the vinegar restraint in the dill pickle chips. Maybe I'll enjoy this similarly!

Skittles
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Just a big bag of Skittles!

Smartphone Gum
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Chocolate and Cookies Fudge
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Not much to say except this is probably good.

Watermelon Wave Cotton Candy
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This melon be surfin'.

Ritter Sport Dark Chocolate With Marzipan
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Small square of chocolate. Very cheap. Hoping it's good. It says chocolate rather than chocolatey, so that's promising.

Pac-Man Blue Raspberry Candies
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Every damned week.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Ritter Sport is a reliable if un-fancy brand (from Germany I think) - I haven’t had the marzipan just cause that’s not a flavor I’m into, but I expect it’ll be good.

That looks like a mini thing, though, the default Ritter is a square like 3” on a side.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Peach Penguins
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Admire the bravery to make the peach-flavoured candy not look like peach. For real, it feels like a friendly trick. You think you are getting licorice but it's peach!
Definitely the best of the week. A fine, fun shape and a delicious peach flavour. Simple but good.
Wakewater Cherry
nCMsJru.jpg

Thank god, the last one of these.
Meanwhile, this is still just a more bitter LaCroix or Bubbly. The aftertaste is fine but everything else is bad.
Covered Bridge Sea Salt & Vinegar
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I chose this because I'm trying to get the flavours I like least out of the way but I was impressed with the vinegar restraint in the dill pickle chips. Maybe I'll enjoy this similarly!
Like Pickle, I like these more than most vinegary chips. It's sort of vinegary and as someone who mostly like vinegar as a compliment, this works for me. Fans of intense pure vinegar flavour might be disappointing though.
Skittles
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Just a big bag of Skittles!
Still a classic. It really is a candy were, if you are a lonely loser like me, a small bag will do, really.
Smartphone Gum
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The gum here was competent but somehow lacking. It was like... not quite cheap chiclets. I feel like there's a more popular gum similar to this. Flatter chiclets, if that helps?
Chocolate and Cookies Fudge
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Not much to say except this is probably good.
It was good but I barely tasted the cookie aspect. I "FELT" it in texture, though. Which is nice.
Watermelon Wave Cotton Candy
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This melon be surfin'.
A decent cotton candy. I could taste the watermelon flavour but it's a flavour that works better when it is very wet.
Ritter Sport Dark Chocolate With Marzipan
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Small square of chocolate. Very cheap. Hoping it's good. It says chocolate rather than chocolatey, so that's promising.
This was good. Tasting it, I'm reminded, I like marzipan OK, but it is neither my favourite sweet or Homestar Runner character.
Pac-Man Blue Raspberry Candies
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Every damned week.
I liked this pretty good, actually. It goes well with this kind of candy.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Thursday

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Kinder Chocolate
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This seems a most basic version but I bet it's good.

Super Star Candies
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If these don't make me temporarily invincible, I'll be so cheesed.

Pop Rocks Crackling Gum
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"Crackling good gum, Gromit."

Amish Country Popcorn and French Fry
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Ooo, my homemade air fryer fries just found a new friend.

McCormack Gummi Puzzle Pieces
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Baby Shark Candy Spray
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Pink Fong always sounded vague obscene to me.

Vidal Fruits and Veggies Gummies
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Wow, this must be really healthy.

Covered Bridge Sweet Potato and Sea Salt
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Covered Bridge has been killing it and now we are getting to flavours I'm actually inclined to like.

ZOA - Cherry Limeade
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Looks like I'm not done with questionable energy drinks.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Baby Shark Candy Spray
Great, I just watched the second ep of the new season of Umbrella Academy and now it’s back in my head again.


I’ve always loved sweet potato fries, but I haven’t had a lot of chips made from ‘em, I bet they’re good.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Kinder Chocolate
HReizi2.jpg

This seems a most basic version but I bet it's good.
Yep, simple but great.
Super Star Candies
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If these don't make me temporarily invincible, I'll be so cheesed.
The flavour is kind of like Peeps. I've had better but goes down easy.
Pop Rocks Crackling Gum
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"Crackling good gum, Gromit."
This is not bad at all. Decent flavour and forms into gum easily. I will say that chewing doesn't work for Pop Rocks, at least for me. I prefer them to sit in my mouth and pop.
Amish Country Popcorn and French Fry
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Ooo, my homemade air fryer fries just found a new friend.
I was really disappointed in this. To be fair, part of it could be this seasoning is mostly salt rather than spices and the popcorn I had available was "Simply Salted". But my issue wasn't the heavily salted flavour. I don't know how do describe it. Sweet, maybe? I don't think that's right but it's what my mind brought to mind. I hope it will go better with my air fried fries, though.
McCormack Gummi Puzzle Pieces
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A decent gummi. They don't really fit together, though.
Baby Shark Candy Spray
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Pink Fong always sounded vague obscene to me.
A decent candy spray. I'll probably empty it into a bowl of jello mix when I make my next jello batch.
Vidal Fruits and Veggies Gummies
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Wow, this must be really healthy.
Again, Vidal is making a good gummi. The flavours are artificial but I think they do good with the veggie flavours (carrot, pumpkin and beet)
Covered Bridge Sweet Potato and Sea Salt
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Covered Bridge has been killing it and now we are getting to flavours I'm actually inclined to like.
These are good. They feel a bit denser, even by kettle chip standards but it works pretty well.
ZOA - Cherry Limeade
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Looks like I'm not done with questionable energy drinks.
Oh, this isn't bad, actually. Slightly mediciney as is normal for energy drinks but a decent flavour overall. I'd like to have the non-energy flavour.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Friday

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Banana Kool-Aid Slushie

Forgot to take a picture but it was hot so I had this.

Paw Patrol Candy Spray

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Based on the last one, which had really tiny temp tattoos, "gift" is generous.

Koala Juicy Blues

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I got the koala juicy blues so bad.

Mario Brick Candy

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The candies are OK but these are nice tins.

Pop Rocks Green Apple
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Ah, pop rocks. I do like candy with a gimmick.

Covered Bridge - Smokin' Sweet BBQ
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BBQ isn't my favourite but I like how covered bridge seems to season it's chips more lightly than a lot of the mainstream brands.

Big Turk
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A Canadian bar that's basically like a chocolate covered Swedish fish. A favourite of mine.

ZOA Wild Orange
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Wild?

Snoopy Waffle Kit
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It looks kind of like a stroopwaffle smore. Figured the summery imagery would work for the last Summer treat.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Just actually looked at the package more closely and realized it’s chocolate covered Turkish delight, though I guess Turkish delight can mean pretty different things in different places…
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Just actually looked at the package more closely and realized it’s chocolate covered Turkish delight, though I guess Turkish delight can mean pretty different things in different places…
That's the IDEA but it really tastes more like Swedish fish (not 100% the same but, like 85%(. There is a British chocolate bar with the same idea but it handles it differently. The inside of Fry's Turkish Delight is good but it has much more give to the bite and is stickier.

s-l1200.jpg
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Banana Kool-Aid Slushie

Forgot to take a picture but it was hot so I had this.
I'm not that into banana drinks, this is just fine.
Paw Patrol Candy Spray

SDCZsU2.jpg


Based on the last one, which had really tiny temp tattoos, "gift" is generous.
OK. The raspberry flavour is OK but this stuff always has that weird, slightly scratchy "unfrozen freezie" tastes.
Koala Juicy Blues

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I got the koala juicy blues so bad.
Koala gummies always have good texture but I'm not always into their creamy tastes. This one isn't creamy, so it's a decent little gummy, despite my mild antipathy to blue raspberry
Mario Brick Candy

Z3ci8Pl.jpg


The candies are OK but these are nice tins.
I swore it said "bricks", unless they switched this with a different Mario candy from last week. They are shaped like hats. It's an OK candy, like all of them. These candies are better when they are fruity and not when it is a milder flavour, like just sugar.
Pop Rocks Green Apple
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Ah, pop rocks. I do like candy with a gimmick.
Pop Rocks is still good. The fruity flavour not only pops literally but the sweet candy flavour for these is pretty decent.
Covered Bridge - Smokin' Sweet BBQ
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BBQ isn't my favourite but I like how covered bridge seems to season it's chips more lightly than a lot of the mainstream brands.
It is lightly seasoned but it feels less so by the end of the bag. But maybe I shouldn't be eating an entire bag of these in one sitting like a goddamned monster.
Big Turk
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A Canadian bar that's basically like a chocolate covered Swedish fish. A favourite of mine.
I still really like these. It's a nice, simply flavour and while I wouldn't call it "Turkish delight", it is a delicious, firm gelatinous candy thing.
ZOA Wild Orange
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Wild?
Even better than the last. Not sure what makes it wild but it's pronounced and delicious. Like I said last week, the medicinal taste hurts it a little but really that's because energy drinks aren't really for me.
Snoopy Waffle Kit
JjjufI4.jpeg

It looks kind of like a stroopwaffle smore. Figured the summery imagery would work for the last Summer treat.
So it is a stroopwaffle smore cookie thing but the problem is the marshmallow cream is powdered and with the Japanese package, I had no idea how much water to used. So I tried just a little, so it was closer to a milk. So I dunked the cookie in. Not what the creators intended but... not bad, I guess. That said, it's a lot of work for one little sandwich thing.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Saturday

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Did too many gummies this week. Anyway...

Creepy Gummi
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I remember these (or something like these) from my childhood. Not just bug gummies but the single packing of them.

Haribo Goldbears

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They aren't gold.

Covered Bridge - Homestyle Ketchup
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For any Americans reading (or other non-Canadians), ketchup is one of the standard flavours for Canadian chips (as well as All-Dressed). Despite loving ketchup, the topping, I was never ever a fan of ketchup chips. There's a sweetness and slight acidity to it I just never jibed with. I can't quite articulate it. But, again, I've been very happy with every Covered Bridge, even the flavours that aren't my jam.

McCormick's Gummi Unicorns

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This looks less rainbow and more Easter. I think it's there's too many yellow and should be more blue and purple. Exactly right amount of pink, I think.

Dora the Explorer Candy Spray
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Can you say dulce pulverización?
ZOA - Tropical Punch
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The lasty ZOA. These have been fun. Sadly, I think I'm heading towards more energy drinks and I probably won't like them as much.

Crispy Crunch
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Maybe my all time favourite chocolate bar. I assumed the flaky laying inside was a sort of toffee or peanut brittle but wikipedia calls it a "crispy peanut butter flake". Highly recommended for non-Canadians to try!

Taiyaki

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I forgot to check the name but this is clearly a taiyaki-themed snack. Or, idunno, a dried fish.

Russell Stover Butterscotch
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Some classic old folk candy.
 

LBD_Nytetrayn

..and his little cat, too
(He/him)
Covered Bridge - Homestyle Ketchup
nMp59O1.jpg

For any Americans reading (or other non-Canadians), ketchup is one of the standard flavours for Canadian chips (as well as All-Dressed). Despite loving ketchup, the topping, I was never ever a fan of ketchup chips. There's a sweetness and slight acidity to it I just never jibed with. I can't quite articulate it. But, again, I've been very happy with every Covered Bridge, even the flavours that aren't my jam.
I hear you; I'm kinda finicky about which ketchup chips I like. I find I prefer Doritos to, say, Lay's.

Maybe I just prefer the ketchup flavoring with corn chips, rather than potato, ironically?
Crispy Crunch
8vGc4zE.jpg

Maybe my all time favourite chocolate bar. I assumed the flaky laying inside was a sort of toffee or peanut brittle but wikipedia calls it a "crispy peanut butter flake". Highly recommended for non-Canadians to try!
Oooh, I love these.
 

Büge

Arm Candy
(she/her)
Creepy Gummi
zvjdouT.jpg

I remember these (or something like these) from my childhood. Not just bug gummies but the single packing of them.
The main thing I remember about these is being able to eat maybe two thirds of one before getting sick of it.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Maybe my all time favourite chocolate bar. I assumed the flaky laying inside was a sort of toffee or peanut brittle but wikipedia calls it a "crispy peanut butter flake". Highly recommended for non-Canadians to try!
I’m not normally a big proponent of crispy/flakey layers in a candy bar, but I’d definitely try one made from peanut butter.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Creepy Gummi
zvjdouT.jpg

I remember these (or something like these) from my childhood. Not just bug gummies but the single packing of them.
Again, Vidal succeeds in design and sense of fun. I feel like a lot of company's like McCormick knows it's fun to try different shapes but Vidal knows to add detail or to mix up the textures. This isn't their best, as it also makes the flat sides too sticky but I love the creepy designs and they taste decent.
Haribo Goldbears

SipqOCR.jpg


They aren't gold.
These ones have good flavour but I feel like it's *slightly* too firm. But only slightly. It's not a chore to eat and I don't like it when gummies are too soft and have too much give but I feel like it is a mere iota from being better.
Covered Bridge - Homestyle Ketchup
nMp59O1.jpg

For any Americans reading (or other non-Canadians), ketchup is one of the standard flavours for Canadian chips (as well as All-Dressed). Despite loving ketchup, the topping, I was never ever a fan of ketchup chips. There's a sweetness and slight acidity to it I just never jibed with. I can't quite articulate it. But, again, I've been very happy with every Covered Bridge, even the flavours that aren't my jam.
This is good but it's probably my least favourite. I will say, I don't know if anyone else agreed but I've always been disappointed with the flavouring of "homestyle" ketchup in restaurants.
McCormick's Gummi Unicorns

yhw0mCC.jpg

This looks less rainbow and more Easter. I think it's there's too many yellow and should be more blue and purple. Exactly right amount of pink, I think.
McCormick remains far from bad but in the rankings, they might be my third or fourth favourite in the gummi world. They are fine and I like they do different shapes but they aren't as creative as Vidal
Dora the Explorer Candy Spray
ehHvtqv.jpg

Can you say dulce pulverización?
Strawberry flavour. I love strawberries but I'm rarely excited by "Strawberry flavour" so this did little for me. At least the flavour matches the character colours.
ZOA - Tropical Punch
P5Ifnt2.jpg

The lasty ZOA. These have been fun. Sadly, I think I'm heading towards more energy drinks and I probably won't like them as much.
This is weird. The base flavour is my least favourite of the ZOA's but the trade-off is something about the flavour also hides the mediciney (what I assume is ginseng) flavour better than the other two. If you need to have one and that element is a no-go, this is probably your best choice. If you don't care, go with one of the other two. Also, some of the habenero hot sauce spilled on this and accidentally made it a spicier drinking experience. But not a bad one.
Crispy Crunch
8vGc4zE.jpg

Maybe my all time favourite chocolate bar. I assumed the flaky laying inside was a sort of toffee or peanut brittle but wikipedia calls it a "crispy peanut butter flake". Highly recommended for non-Canadians to try!
Yeah, this might be my favourite chocolate bar. Seek it out if you've never had one.
Taiyaki

UQTP0rx.jpg

I forgot to check the name but this is clearly a taiyaki-themed snack. Or, idunno, a dried fish.
OK, so the outside is a very light, fragile "cone". Not in shape but like the stuff the cheap ice cream cones are made from. Inside is an airy chocolate. I quite liked it, a literally and in other ways "light" snack.
Russell Stover Butterscotch
RwD2COu.jpg

Some classic old folk candy.
It tasted like a solid butterscotch. Nothing beyond that. Will use it in my oats.
 

Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
These ones have good flavour but I feel like it's *slightly* too firm.

Yeah that's usually the feeling I get with any Haribo bears.

I will say, I don't know if anyone else agreed but I've always been disappointed with the flavouring of "homestyle" ketchup in restaurants.

I'm guessing it's usually something closer to just "tomato" than all the stuff that's in something like Heinz...
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Sunday

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Reign Rainbow Sherbet
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Spongebob Squarepants Candy Spray
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WHY COLA FLAVOUR?! PINEAPPLE IS STILL JUST... RIGHT THERE!

Reese's Thins
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Not after I'm done... or before, really.

Dreidel Candy
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This might be the the weirdest flavour. I mean, salted caramel chocolate is not THAT weird a flavour but it is for the kind of hard candy this is. The kind where it is like compressed sugar like the inside of Runts

Swirly Fish
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"You are under my command. Look deep into my flounder."

Covered Bridge Sweet Heat
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Not quite sure what makes it "East Coast Lifestyle". I guess sweet chili sauce is pretty popular but even with our increasingly diverse population, it seems less East Coast specific compared to samosas (which got really popular in New Brunswick in the 90s) and Donair (which they do have a flavour for).

Taiyaki - Strawberry
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I checked the receipt but it still didn't tell me the brand name.

Russell Stover Assorted Fruit Hard Candy - No sugar added
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Another 80s-90s waiting room treat.

Roos Traditional Black
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I'm still not really into black licorice but I like it more than I used to. This one tasted good in strawberry, though was kind of sticky and sweaty in texture.
 
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