What in Blazes!? It's Wild Arms 2!

Previously on Wild Arms 2: Irving is an asshole. But we already knew that. Huh. Guess nothing happened. And that’s just fine! Because now it’s time for…

Wild Arms 2’s Last Remaining Sidequests

At this point, ARMS can descend to the center of Filgaia (or something), and call this whole game’s worth of missions a success. But why do that when we can…



Visit Damzen City for absolutely no reason.



Stick hidden character Marivel in the lead, and Luka, a random NPC that you would never think to revisit in a million years, will spout some unique dialogue.



Marivel is key, obviously.



Apparently Luka was referring to Marivel’s floating weapons that don’t actually appear outside of battle, and literally no one else in the game has ever directly referred to (there were a few books, though).



I feel bad for the localizers that poured minutes of their lives into this exchange’s translation.



Here we go! Not counting the final dungeon, these are directions to the last “undiscovered” dungeon in the game.

… Incidentally, because it doesn’t really fit anywhere else, here are all the other optional dungeons we managed to hit over the course of this Let’s Play at random points:

Wind Tiger’s Den
Thunder Lion Cage
Abandoned Icebox
Meteorite Crater
Dark Reason
Shining Garden
Good Luck Zone
Werewolf’s Den
Crimson Castle
Promised Catacombs
Pirate’s Warren

And there are the optional “town” areas of Odd Headquarters and Island Outpost. There are a lot of optional areas in Wild Arms 2!



But back to Marivel, who will never return to this town, and Luka doesn’t actually have anything to do with this laboratory.



… This is going to end well.



So mount your dragon-plane and fly on over to the southwest to find the Fab(ulous) Science Lab.



Ominous!



…. Erm?



I… I think I’m starting to realize who left this note.



There they are. Say hello again to our old friends Liz and Ard.



Everyone is excited to see each other.



So very excited. I think.



Hey, that’s right! We haven’t seen these guys since way back when we were still fighting Odessa every week.



Hmm.



Yeah, that story checks out.



If you didn’t see someone explode, then they didn’t explode, Ashley.



But I suppose we could use an official explanation.



And Liz is down for a soliloquy.



Even if the party is not.



Never mind the story, Liz & Ard simply weren’t invited to Odessa’s warship.



“Because if you are, it turns out we have the same boss!”



So, yeah, Liz & Ard apparently weren’t official Odessa members. Or, if they were part of the organization, they at least weren’t very trusted. Which… probably not a bad idea…

CONTINUED NEXT POST

And, yeah, if you think back on it, there was literally never a scene, “backstage” or otherwise, where Liz & Ard were anywhere near Vinsfeld or an Odessa general.



And… uh… okay?



“We’re not buying the ‘stars’ thing. Was it for drugs? It was for drugs, wasn’t it?”



Tractor beam?



“Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Hey, Lilka, did we ever find a village of lizard people around? No?”



A noble goal.



We would like to see peace assured. I think that’s in the ARMS charter.



… Yeah, this makes perfect sense.



So apparently Liz & Ard’s security system is on the fritz. … Were they just waiting outside until we arrived? … Probably yes.



I think that’s a Tekken reference. Seriously.



So, in an effort to make us nostalgic for their first appearance, Liz & Ard “join” the party.



The entrance here requires using Marivel’s spark tool to activate the front door. You might expect this dungeon that can only be unlocked by Marivel would require using Marivel’s other tools as well… but nope! Sorry! Marivel, who, incidentally, has never met Liz & Ard before, will not be used anymore within this dungeon.



The next room reveals Liz & Ard’s goal.



They’re aliens trying to get back to space! Lizard shock!



According to people attempting to make the whole translation of Wild Arms 2 make sense, as far as anyone can tell, the “red tractor beam” mentioned during the previous scene was the transmission that Vinsfeld broadcast over Filgaia, and that apparently sucked Liz & Ard down to Filgaia, where they “joined” Vinsfeld by general coincidence.

So Liz & Ard have the same basic arc as Toejam & Earl.



Everyone faces Marivel for this comment. I can’t help but wonder if this is another misattributed bit of translation, or some kind of glitch arising from Marivel being my current party leader.



Anywho, Liz & Ard had to build their own way home, and have been working on that pet project here at the Fab Lab.



We’re here to help (you leave).



So the rest of the dungeon will simply be a walk around the place to gain access to the UFO access hatch.



I genuinely don’t know if there are random encounters in this dungeon. Not a single one popped up, so I want to say no. But… maybe?



The whole “dungeon” is mostly dialogue and random “traps” anyway.



Security system time!



What does “Hard SF” stand for? Could the localizers at least have found a word that starts with F?



So, apparently Liz & Ard based their security system on a quiz show.



On one hand, these “quiz panels” are hard as hell, because the questions and answers are often nonsensical and the sort of trivia you would never notice on your own. How fast can you fly around the world map? Why would you ever know that? And how could you easily time that?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

On the other hand, these questions absolutely shatter the fourth wall, and you might learn something new about the world of Filgaia by trying to discover the right answers. “46” is the right answer to this question, as Brad is apparently 32, and Lilka is 14. I think Lilka’s age is already noted in the game…



And, see, there is no Emma! Put that thought out of your mind!



Though, again, some of these questions are completely nonsensical. Kalivos was one of the first bosses in the game, and… maybe this is an admission from the designers that that name was only supposed to be a placeholder in the first place? Lousy translation…



Anywho, there are two sets of three terminals. They can all offer the same questions, and there’s a pool of… let’s see here… looks like seventeen or so questions. The “problem” with these terminals is that you only find out if you got the questions right after answering all three terminals, and, if you got a single question wrong, you have to try again with potentially all new questions, and no indication which question you got wrong the first time. This can get frustrating, particularly with the questions that make no sense to begin with. However, there isn’t really a penalty for “losing” (save wasting time), so it’s not too bad.



Also, by way of a random question, the terminals do confirm that Lucied the Guardian is supposed to be male in this title, which isn’t confirmed anywhere else in the (original) text (Anastasia used the term “they” for Lucied in this English translation, presumably because she didn’t want to go anywhere near a divine werewolf’s junk). Of course, I didn’t get that question, and just wound up venturing forward…



I know that kind of glowy thing! It’s boss time!



Go ahead and go back and check: Liz has mentioned his greatest creation, Bulkogidon, during every previous encounter.



We finally get to meet!



And it’s out of control, so guess who has to handle this death machine?



This is the only boss in the game that gets an askew title card.



And it’s going to be a doozy.



Bulkogidon is an entirely optional boss, and, like other optional bosses, it is tough as nails. Liz & Ard finally built something powerful!



First of all, Bulky hits like a truck, and one of its main attacks has the ability to paralyze literally the entire party at once. You’d have to be pretty unlucky to see that happen, but you can’t rule it out.



It also knows a dark-elemental attack that… oh, man, sorry, Tim. I really should have equipped an elemental ring so you didn’t lose more than your maximum HP in one hit. I mean, that’s what you get when you’re a mage…



Dammit! Did Bulky just do more than Ashley’s max HP? Dammit! This is going to take a while…



The good news here is that Liz & Ard are idiots. Bulkogidon would be one of the most difficult bosses in the game if not for one glaring weakness: every single weakness. Ever. Bulkogidon is weak to literally every element, so any attacks that use any elements will do massive damage. This means your mages can use their elemental attacks, your physical attackers can equip rings to utilize elemental basic attacks, and literally anyone can rely on summoning elemental-based guardians.



The whole battle is basically a massive damage race, and, if you can survive pretty much any attack without losing all of your HP at once, then it’s just a matter of sticking one character on healing duty while everyone else uses an elemental assault.



Taking down Bulky’s individual body parts will net some Coin Purses, accessories that double gella earned per battle. I don’t think they stack, though…



After that battle, it’s likely no one wants to deal with Liz’s nonsense anymore.



This ain’t Gundam: Liz.



“Is this dungeon done yet?”



I do like the look of Bulkogidon’s control console, though.



Here we are!



Liz built this himself. And we all know he’s a certified genius.



And, for absolutely no reason, a bunch of random animals show up.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Liz & Ard are friends to animals!



They’re just gonna stand there and watch, and you know it.



Yes, even the planet and its furriest inhabitants want Liz & Ard gone.



… Thanks?



Good-bye forever!




“I have to go now. My planet needs me.”



Thanks for the memories?



And something falls to Earth Filagaia.



Hope they’re not important…



Look up!



Yep, this went about how you’d expect. Welcome back, guys.



So Liz & Ard’s final fate is to stand here on this launch platform forever and be generally annoyed at their lot in life. Better luck next time, guys! Enjoy your new planet!



However, the “part” that dropped is a new golem/force ability for Marivel.



I’m sorry, two new golems. Marivel had nothing to do with this dungeon past opening a door, but she gets all the prizes.



Lucifer was a secret (golem) boss from Wild Arms 1, and it had generally the same appearance (though the transforming is probably new). It deals non-elemental damage to everybody. Given the cinematic for the attack, it’s kind of surprising that Lucifer is only Marivel’s Level 3 Force Ability.



Asgard 2 features the return of Asgard from Marivel’s Level 2 Force Ability (and Wild Arms 1). It’s Marivel’s most powerful Force Ability, but is otherwise unremarkable.

Also, I can’t help but wonder if something was… screwed up with Marivel’s Golem abilities. Marivel starts with Level 1, Level 2 is hidden in the same dungeon where you find Marivel, and then 3 & 4 are both dropped on you in a dungeon that barely has anything to do with the vampire. And, thanks to Level 2 being fairly well hidden, it’s very easy to wind up with Asgard 2 and no Asgard (1). And, rather than have both abilities drop at once, it would have made a little more sense for the two to be split between the Fab Lab and Forgotten Catacombs, a dungeon that is Marivel themed, but offers no Marivel-based rewards. It’s weird, and makes me wonder how late Marivel and her special abilities were implemented in the game (and there will be further questions about that later).

Anywho, that’s it for Liz & Ard, and now we will never see them again. Liz & Ard, you were truly kings among Lizardians, and the fact that you two idiots are never referenced again in the franchise is a crying shame. In remembrance of this duo, from now on March 3rd shall be Lizardman Day, and all children shall celebrate the Lizardmen that once came to save Filgaia.

So, technically, I performed this side quest before venturing into the final dungeon. However, the next little adventure requires a tool hidden in the final dungeon. Additionally, everything else past this point is all super bosses, and the final dungeon hides the best armor for our heroes. So, with that in mind…



The rest of this update technically takes place after venturing into the final dungeon. Wild Arms 2 does not save a “clear file” for returning to the game after defeating the final boss, nor does it unlock additional playable content after clearing the game. However, it is in your (and my) best interest to complete the majority of the final dungeon for its excellent treasure, and then walk all the way back to the world above before tackling any of the rest of the content in this update.

So, tldr, technically the remainder of this update takes place after the content in the following updates. But, since super bosses don’t really have an impact on the narrative, they’re getting stuck here in the optional update. Got it? Okay, good.



We discovered Pirate’s Warren a few updates back, but we can explore the rest of the area with a tool from the final dungeon.



This is literally the only place that requires this final tool outside of the final dungeon.



And it unlocks a room containing this friendly fellow.



This is an appropriately nautical-themed boss for Pirate’s Warren.



Gatlorg is the easiest of the optional “super” bosses. Its main gimmick is that it has a very high evade stat, so hitting it with normal attacks is more annoying than anything.



Other than that, Gatlorg hits like a regular boss, and has a fairly manageable HP pool. Gatlorg really feels like it was intended to be a normal boss somewhere, and was rescued from the cutting room floor as an encounter in this optional area.



Like most squid-pirate ship hybrids, Gatlorg is weak to lightning. Its data also indicates it is weak to fire, which seems… odd.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Gatlorg does have the ability to “eat” a character and absorb the entirety of their HP. It’s basically an instant death attack with a twist, though the amount of HP restored doesn’t make much of an impact on the proceedings.



Stupid thing doesn’t even get a unique death animation.



Gatlorg is the weakest optional boss, and offers the weakest reward. All we have here is an accessory that boosts attack power, and it’s locked behind a duplicator chest. Gatlorg is only really “worth it” for the bragging rights of having defeated every optional boss, and, even then, no one is going to be impressed.



Okay, now let’s hit the big boys.



Halmetz is that town that was entirely kidnapped by Odessa way back when. It’s also close to Fiery Wreckage, so its populace will talk about that dungeon from now until the end of Filgaia.



But the reason we’re here is this lovely pyramid hovering over in the corner of town. This dude is the only NPC in the universe that offers an explanation for where these things come from. Answer: dunno.



But, for anyone that didn’t play Wild Arms 1, he’s the only one that offers an answer as to what to do with these pyramids.



Time to make some noise with Marivel’s secret tool. Just a reminder: in order to participate in any of the pyramid battles, you must have recruited secret character Marivel, read the secret book in the first town’s library, found Marivel’s second tool in the Promised Catacombs, and then used that tool back in Lost Garden to unlock Marivel’s final tool. Long road to travel.



All just to see Titanius and his various buddies.



I’m pretty sure all of the super bosses have entirely unique models. Eat it, Final Fantasy franchise.



The super bosses can be tackled in any order, and I’m going to specifically battle them in “Goggle Bob finally remembered to go here” order. There doesn’t seem to be any in-game intended order for these dudes.



Titanius hits hard, as would be expected of a super boss.



It is also apparently lightning-themed, so some defenses against lightning would be recommended.



Titanius’s big deal is that it is very defensive and difficult to damage. It’s weak to wind attacks, though, so that can help.



Unfortunately, that might not be enough. Titanius has high defense and it can regenerate its HP whenever it likes. This leaves a few options: first, the “real” way would be to max everyone’s FP all at once, and then unleash the most damage in a round that could ever be possible by using every last drop of FP simultaneously. Or you could just notice that Titanius is weak to status effects, and get lucky with an instant death skill (available to Ashley, Tim, or Marivel in various forms), or use Marivel’s Power Seal ability to silence Titanius’s ability to utilize any healing abilities.



Either way, your goal is basically to do as much damage as possible in about three rounds, whether that be through normal means or trickery.



This grants Ashley his most powerful weapon, the Stootn (Shooting) Star. This is a double pun, as “shooting” has an obvious implication, and, if you recall, Ashley literally was a “shooting star” at the end of Disc 1.



Each super boss grants a special reward for victory, but otherwise impacts nothing. There is no ultimate prize for banishing each pyramid, but I am going to keep count here.

Pyramids Defeated: 1



Next stop is Meteorite Crater, an optional area where we first found the Star Guardian.



Nearly all of the pyramids are near their area’s respective entrances, so you don’t have to go dungeon diving again.



Also, oddly, the majority of super bosses’ names are toward the end of the alphabet.



And the majority of super bosses are ugly as hell.



A number of super bosses have an extra body part. Defeating this extra target generally means an extra Ambrosia (an item that restores the entire party’s HP) at the end of the battle.



Zavorg is another defensive super boss. Magic will always miss on this dork, and he starts the battle by “wasting” a number of turns on upping his defense to insane levels. On one hand, every turn he’s casting barrier, he’s not attacking. On the other hand, he gets really hard to damage really fast.



And his complete immunity to magic means even Lilka is going to have to whip out the ol’ umbrella.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

And just because you can’t use magic doesn’t mean Zavorg can’t use magic to smack everyone around.



After Zavorg’s defense is maxed, it will start powering up its own attack. That’s not good for anybody (except Zavorg).



Ultimately, hitting Zavorg is like hitting a brick wall, but is otherwise manageable. It doesn’t have any regenerative abilities, so equip a black ring on your physical attackers to hit its weakness, and go to town. You’ll see an exploding bug in no time.



Lilka’s best weapon is your reward. Lilka will never use her physical attack ever again.

Pyramids Defeated: 2



Wind Tiger’s Den is our next stop.



I’m sure that pyramid can hear us from here.



Who’s a spikey boy?



Or girl? … Queen?



Zolinge is here to tear your limb from limb. Its big thing is its speed, so don’t expect to ever go first in this battle.



Its… interesting biology also affords it an instant death attack, and your luck will basically determine the difficulty of this battle. If your characters are constantly falling to instant death, things are going to get dicey. But if you’re lucky enough that its instant death move barely ever connects (which is fairly likely), this winds up being the easiest super boss in the game.



It is weak to earth attacks. Throw rocks at it!



And watch out for the pointy bits.



Using the Holy Grail item with Lilka’s mystic ability is supposed to guard the entire party against instant death attacks. This dork didn’t wind up using its instant death attack after sipping from the Holy Grail, though, so I can’t say for certain if that actually works in this battle.



Go away, you uncooperative bug-lizard-boomerang monster.



Dist Dims is the best wand available for Tim. I believe this is a reference to a similarly named item from Wild Arms (1).

Pyramids Defeated: 3



Moving on to Mt. Chug-Chug.



Aw, was this the first pyramid we ever saw?



Twins!



Evil penguin twins!



Zyclus and Zetrim are two separate entities, so they both get turns. Obviously, the hardest part of this super boss is managing two different opponents.



Zyclus (red) appears to be the fast one, and Zetrim (black) is the strong one. It’s probably best to defeat Zyclus first, as Zetrim might bleed off more of your HP, but at least your healer will be able to act earlier to save a few deaths.



Other than a few pretty colors, it appears there are no other differences between the bros.



And they’re both very weak to lightning.



Oh! I finally remembered to use Lilka’s force ability to combine two spells. Lit1 + Lit2 = Lit3. As you can see, it does massive damage, and is very useful when you’re dealing with opponents that have an elemental weakness.



Anywho, the brothers have one incredibly powerful tidal wave attack (Gilas Spin), and if they both decide to use that move on the same turn, you’re in trouble. You basically have to keep your HP topped off in preparation for that possibility.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

I guess the WA2 staff couldn’t figure out how to implement a cool death animation when there are two bosses, so regular deaths for these penguins.



Once we’re down to one brother, this fight is a cakewalk.



Our reward is Marivel’s best “helmet”. Most of the best armor in the game is available at the base of the final dungeon, but Marivel only earns her equipment through Marivel means. Her “best” weapon is also her only weapon, which is strengthened through (findable) consumable items. And I think her best cloak was back in the Thunder Lion’s Cage hidden area. So, sometimes, goggles are all you get.

I’m not complaining.

Pyramids Defeated: 4



Off to good ol’ Slayheim Castle.



This pyramid is a little further in than the others, but is still in the general entrance area.



Can’t fool me, that’s an elephant!



Tandem war elephant?



Xenon is not a friendly beast.



Odds of being trampled and gored are very high.



Xenon does a little flex at the start of the battle: Barrier is supposed to raise its defense, but it has no effect. What does that mean? Xenon’s defense is already at maximum. Be afraid.



And then it murders the entire party in one shot. What the hell, Xenon!?



So you have two options: Xenon always uses Ray Force on its second turn, so defending when you know that is coming is an option. Downside? From that point on, Xenon can use Ray Force on any round, so you basically always have to have someone “wasting” a turn on defending, because otherwise everyone will be very dead. Your other (viable) choice is to scoot back to Valeria Chateau and stop by this shop.



I’ve mentioned the elemental rings randomly before, but this is the first battle that really requires them. The upside of the elemental rings is that they modify your defenses to halve the featured element. The downside is that they also modify your basic attack to be the featured element. This is a double-edged sword, as you often want your attack to be the opposite of your defense. Using Xenon as an example here, we want to defend against light attacks with the Light Ring, but a basic attack that is light-based will heal Xenon. So, basically, we can’t use regular attacks while equipped with these rings at all.

Though, to be clear, the rings can be useful for attacking in other battles, like the previously defeated Zavorg.



So take two on Xenon. Now that we have Light Rings, Ray Force is merely horrifying, and not apocalyptic.



Now it’s just a matter of doing as much damage as possible. Most of our physical attackers have moves that allow for an attack without the ring impacting anything, like Ashley and his Mad Lucien here.



As you can probably guess, Xenon is weak to dark attacks, so feel free to abuse the Dark Guardian and Tim’s dark spells. In fact, please do that, as Xenon starts to use healing spells when critical, which can really make the battle drag.



Kanon’s final weapon is the prize. That is oddly appropriate, as we first fought Kanon in this very hallway.

Pyramids Defeated: 5



Speaking of fighting Kanon, here’s where we had our final battle with our favorite cyborg.



I will admit that this battle became one of the last on the list because I kinda forgot it existed.



Bodyguard for who, exactly?



(Non-King) Kobolds do appear as regular monsters here and there, but they don’t appear to be related to this big boy.



Dude doesn’t even have a belly? What gives?



Kobold King is on about the same level as that boomerang butthead from earlier. It has a lot of physical attacks, one full-party, earth-themed attack, and one super-powerful attack that has a tendency to miss.



Overall, it’s one of the easier super bosses (though still pretty damn tough if you’re under-leveled or unprepared).



And that’s it for this “bodyguard”.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Your completely disproportionate reward is Brad’s best weapon. Since Brad has a tendency to rely on his physical attacks, this is arguably the most useful of all the super-boss weapon rewards.

Pyramids Defeated: 6



Now… a little more cheating. The next two super bosses are incredibly difficult. And, while I will be happy to tell you the “real” strategies for these final two challenges, I am a relentless cheater.



As this is the absolute end of the game, I decided to gameshark back in a maximum number of items (both consumables and accessories), and maxed everyone’s HP to 9,999. To be clear: these changes will even still not make these battles easy, but I’m not going to have to juggle rings or worry about conserving healing items. Note that it is possible to have HP (nearly) this high through exploiting the skill point system for HP at level ups as early as possible... but that requires a bit of foresight grinding.



You may recall that this “all items” cheat once made the game literally unbeatable, but I’m not so much worried about key item overflow now.



First last stop, Golgotha Prison, where ARMS was once nearly crucified.



This pyramid is very easy to miss, as this general area is only ever seen during a cutscene.



Welcome to Flavor Country.



Even among the super bosses, Angolmois stands a head above. It also seems to resemble the golems of Wild Arms 1 (like Lucifer from earlier in the update), even though the “original” Angol Moa (slightly different spelling) was a biological “psychic force” and hidden boss of Wild Arms 1.



It’s pleasant that this arena background is only used once in the game back during Disc 1, but it is updated with the “threatening sky” of Disc 2 for this battle. That will be the only pleasant thing about this battle.



Angolmois does not know how to not completely obliterate your party. Its weakest attack, Great Disaster, has general odds on inflicting confuse, so you basically have to come into the battle with something that will prevent that status effect. It will also use a party-wide dispel spell at random points, so you can’t rely on preventing status effects with any magic during the battle.



Angolmois’s greatest attack is 7th Moon, which will obliterate any characters that haven’t been hacked to absolutely maximum stats. Like with Xenon, you basically have to always have someone on defense just in case.



You can get pretty lucky with Angolmois’s early phases, as it also has a basic physical attack, and Smithereens, which is the critical version of that. Either of those attacks have a tendency to miss, and, coupled with its dispel ability, you do have the occasional free turn with which to mount an offensive.

Unfortunately, once it loses about half of its 100000 HP, Angolmois goes into its own (unannounced) berserker mode, and will start using 7th Moon repeatedly. At this point, it becomes nearly impossible to outpace the damage being dealt, and you have to unload everything or die. Use your strongest attacks for every character, and hope for the best. If you’re down to 0 FP and it is still standing… well, you can always try again later.



I managed to pull it off.



Your reward is a Force Unit, an accessory that doubles your FP accumulation.



This is rather game-breaking, and means that Ashley could transform into Knight Blazer immediately and constantly. Of course you have to beat arguably the hardest boss in the game to get it in the first place…

Pyramids Defeated: 7



Our concluding stop is Holst, the mining town we last visited when Kanon joined our party.



We’re going to head back into the mines…



Search deep into the underground…



Absolutely use this save point…



And here’s our final destination.



Ragu O Ragula is arguably an easier boss than Angolmois, but it has more street cred in the franchise, so we’re facing it last.



Ragu O Ragula appeared in Wild Arms 1, and would go on to appear in Wild Arms 3-5. In at least a few Wild Arms titles, Ragu O Ragula gets some backstory naming it as the king of all monsters, and is banished to The Abyss, an extra dimensional prison constructed entirely to contain it. What I’m getting at here is that Ragu O Ragula is bad news.



I have no idea where that name comes from, though.



Rags gets its own boss theme in Wild Arms 2, and this is apparently the first title where it utilizes what would become its signature attack, 1 Trillion Degrees. I asked a scientist, and she informed me that 1,000,000,000,000 degrees is, and I quote, “very hot.”



So what’s to be done about ol’ Ragula? Well, you’re in for a treat, as Ragu is resistant to all elemental attacks save fire, which it absorbs. It also alternates between a super-powerful fire attack, and a super-powerful dark attack. This means you can’t just rely on one elemental ring, but you can hedge your bets, and equip one character with a Fire Ring, and the other with a Dark Ring. At least then someone isn’t getting one-shotted every turn.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Since Ragu is resistant to damn near everything, a popular strategy is to keep Brad as alive as possible, and just have him clobber the beast as best he can. Pour literally all of your resources into keeping that “hero” alive.



Ragu O’ Ragula doesn’t really switch patterns like Angolmoa, so if you can survive the initial onslaught, it’s just a battle of attrition. Since the two super bosses are on roughly the same level, you can take your pick on which monster is a better “final” use of your resources.



Incidentally, Ragu O’ Ragula received a major glow-up between Wild Arms games. Everyone always talks about how the NES and SNES saw major advances over the course of their respective console lifespans, but don’t count out the change between early and late Playstation 1 titles.



There it is. The finest achievement in any Wild Arms game.



The Sheriff Star is the reward for beating nearly every Ragu incarnation in every Wild Arms game (“nearly” because Wild Arms 5 messed it all up).



This accessory confers major stat boosts, a resistance to all elements, and immunity to all status effects. As this is a major boon for the Angolmoa fight, this is seemingly another reason to tackle Ragu first.

But I’m a rebel, baby.




And that’s that! The slate in the Thunder Lion Cage made reference to a “ferocious 8-bodied monster” that contained the power of the Crimson Nobles, and now we’ve slain eight pyramids full of monsters. Will this revive the Crimson Nobles and lead to Marivel being happy with her revived people? Of course not! But it’s nice that this sidequest had a sliver of a purpose. Nothing like cleaning up after long-dead immortals!

Though, speaking of the Crimson Nobles, the other enigma of Marivel’s design is that she learns enemy status effect skills… and they all work on the super bosses. While it’s a very tense way to win, you can technically win against Angol and Ragu by repeatedly using Marivel to cast sleep, and hoping to Zephyr that the boss doesn’t wake up at an inopportune moment. Other forms of cheating: always an option!



Now we’re turning back the clock to before all those battles, and it’s time for the real final battle. Let’s stop dilly-dallying and venture forth to complete ARMS’ final mission.

Next time on Wild Arms 2: A puddle of mud.

It's not really a secret that the various iterations of the WA setting are post-apocalyptic sci-fantasy, but one thing that does come up fairly often (at least in 1 and 3) is that humanity isn't native to Filgaia. It's more hinted at in 1 than 3's explicit "Hey, look at this crashed human colony ship" bits, but then 1's backstory is waaaaaay more apocalyptic than any of the other games outside 3.

Unless Ragu has defeated Godzilla then it hasn't earned that title. (So many of those super-bosses look like kaiju.)

Early in the week update because I have to play Secret of Mana 2 right the heck now.

Previously on this Wild Arms 2 Let’s Play: I distinctly noted in the absolute first post that “This isn’t a walk through, and I’m not going to hit every single sidequest, because I want this thing to end before the heat death of the universe” And then I finished every single sidequest. Dammit. May as well beat the game now.



Nothing left to do now but board my metal dragon and… Wait, where were we going, again? Better check with Kate and/or Amy.



Spiral Tower, I guess! Not that that was ever mentioned in the note Irving left for us.



Dammit! I really wanted to take my airship monster out for one last spin.



So Spiral Tower is pretty close to home, but it’s on a peninsula that pulls the old JRPG trope of requiring a little overworld walking to get there.



There are no “puzzles” on the Filgaia overworld, so this is mostly just an excuse for a few extra random encounters. Here’s some friendly smoke monster we found on the way.



Technically you can walk to this area much earlier than the finale of the game. Your reward for doing such a thing would be the Viper Fang. Viper Fang is an item that may be used with the Shot (Throw) command, and is basically Final Fantasy 4’s Kitchen Knife/Spoon for Wild Arms 2. It will automatically do 25,000 HP damage, and can be used in conjunction with Boost to pull off a full 50,000 HP. That’s about half the HP of the superest of super bosses, so it can come in handy… but only once. Just don’t waste it on a random encounter.

Also, Viper Fang is likely a reference to Wild Arms 1’s Boomerang, a recurring bad boy who was rather fond of a certain type of Australian weapon.



Here we are. Spiral Tower is just sitting here at the exact center of the world. This is one of those weird, millennia old structures that just kind of hangs out, and apparently no one but Irving and ARMS have ever explored the place.



At least someone is keeping the lights on.



Despite the world map graphic, it appears Spiral Tower is a gigantic tower going straight down. A downward, spiral staircase will appear after every proper room in this dungeon.



First challenge: a terrible bridge.



These falling blocks will not restore after they drop (so you don’t have to perfectly remember the hole locations), and Tim’s Mist Cloak is a must for crossing at least one gap.



Treasure chests are all over Spiral Tower. Most contain high-level consumables, like Mega Berries or Revive Fruits.



The next room contains the worst puzzle ever.



Just for funsies, here’s the complete text of these plates all over the room:

“The spiral turns from the Moon to the Sun won't change the past, the future nor the present.”
This is our guiding principle or something. The rest of the plates read…

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. I am Saturn, god of agriculture and ruler of the world during the age of happiness.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. I am Tiu, god of the sky and war, bringer of the flame of disaster to destroy all creation.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. I am Frigg, goddess of love and fertility. After losing my husband Od, my tears turned to gold.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. Looking down are the new Moon and the old Moon, king mother's face and cruel queen of the night.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. I am Thor, god of thunder, wielder of the hammer Mjolnir and the defender of the Aesir.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. I am Wotan, leader of the Wild Hunt, a band of specters riding the winds of winter storms.”

“The lost tale of Genesis will hereby be imparted. The sun glitters with hope. If one's heart is filled with hope, darkness exits and the sun appears.”



Each of these inscriptions is a switch. Obviously, you’re supposed to press them… at some point?



I’m betting that, for your average player, Thor is about the only recognizable name here.



So what are we supposed to do? The instructions mention going from the Moon to the Sun, and there certainly are obvious Moon and Sun plates. But what are we supposed to do in-between? Do we have to use every switch? Is there a particular order that has to be followed? What do all these random gods (gods that, incidentally, have not been mentioned elsewhere in the game, nor seem to exist [even in legend] in Filgaia) have to do with anything?

Can you solve this puzzle?

Here’s a hint: The Black-Eyed Peas would be able to solve it.

Yes, like in their seminal song, I Gotta Feeling, the answer is to party every day (party every day). The Moon is Monday, the Sun is Sunday, and you’re supposed to press the plates in “day” order:

Moon – Monday
Tiu – Tuesday
Wotan (Odin)- Wednesday
Thor – Thursday
Frigg – Friday
Saturn – Saturday
Sun – Sunday

How the hell you’re supposed to immediately make that connection with this puzzle is beyond me, but, man, good on you if you managed to pull that one off without a FAQ.

And I have no idea how this puzzle/room works in the original Japanese.



Also, Tyr got robbed.



Okay, moving on to some more explosion-based puzzles.



First little area is easy: stand on the switch, and use a bomb to activate the glowy egg thing. This will lower the platform, and you can move on.



Two switches, and two eggs? This is much harder than knowing the days of the week.



Don’t forget to use one of Tim’s oddly useful tools to obtain a little treasure.



The next room is the same basic deal, but you have to be a little nimble to drop your bomb, and then quickly scurry over to the proper floor switch. It might take a few tries, but it’s not challenging.



And now for a little extra running.



That’s it for eggs for now.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Have I mentioned that the last dungeon contains monsters? It does! Also, oddly enough, I want to say that spikey skeletons and gargoyles also appeared in the Final Fantasy 7 final dungeon, too…



Our next challenges are some platforms that move more than you’d expect. These are very similar to the blocks found in the Lost Garden, and it could be a bit of subtle storytelling that these ruins were constructed around the same time.



This room has a rare “middle” exit. What could be in here?



Why, it’s Ashley’s (and the party’s) final tool.



The Flare Gun has two purposes. It can light up a room, and it can hit switches on the ceiling. Coincidentally, it will also be used, like, twice.



Let there be light! At this point, you can now exit the dungeon and fight that one hidden boss at Pirate’s Warren. This is as deep as you have to go to see all optional content back on the surface world, but you can keep going further for more treasure. Or to, ya know, save the world.



As you might expect, leaving the next room requires using the Flare Gun to hit a ceiling switch. I guess Ashley would never otherwise figure out he could throw one of his throwing knives “up”.



More moving platform fun. This room is a little more complicated...



But Mist Cloaking around will solve any big problems.



How far down do you think we are at this point? And how musty do you figure this dungeon has to be? Did Irving dust on his way down?



The next room is a little dark. Incidentally, aside from Pirate’s Warren, the only other place (outside of this dungeon) where the Flare Gun is useful is Werewolf’s Den… but that’s pretty manageable in the dark.



This room has some randomly lit torches, but you can’t touch any of them. ... Wait, shouldn’t the torches have lit up this room?



Whatever. Let’s move on.



Ah, here we go. This room looks exactly like the last one, but none of the torches are lit. Guess the solution!



Yes, you have to light the torches to match the layout of the previous room. If you forgot what you were doing, feel free to climb those stairs behind you to refresh your memory.



Now this looks like fun.



Midboss!



Grodine: Like Undine, but after growing? I've got Undine on the brain...



And King Crab is on the menu!



There is just nothing exciting about Grodine. I guess someone felt this area needed a midboss?



He hits hard… or… uh… medium? He hits medium. And he uses water attacks. Other than that? I’m pretty sure Grodine would not have been a challenge back before the end of Disc 1, left alone now.



It is also hella weak to lightning, so just go ahead and get pikachu on its crusty ass.



Aw, if you break its king claw, it has to attack with its lil’ baby claw.



And then it exploded and was gone forever. The end.



“I already forgot that monster’s name!”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Good cardio dungeon.



Our next trick or trap or whatever is cursed doors.



Interacting with these doors will summon a random monster mob, and… Wait. Is that a twin-tailed cat balancing on its front legs? Huh.



Anywho, defeat the monsters, and the door disappears. Sometimes you don’t want to do that, though, as the tops of these doors are perfectly valid platforms.



In order to get all the treasure in this room, you have to actually walk out the exit, turn around, and then re-enter, causing the door/platform to respawn, but now you’re behind it, so you can sneak over to goodies.



Ambrosia restores everyone’s HP. Very useful!



The next room contains demon doors and those egg/bomb switches. Lowering and raising doors is the name of the game.



You basically have to walk around the perimeter of the room without activating a door to hit all the switches…



And then it’s time for door bustin’.



I still love the monster design in this game.



Stair design? Not so much.



This room is a jerk.



Your goal is to Mist Cloak along the tops of the doors, but if you fall, you have to fight your way out from between the doors and reset the room. It’s not all that difficult, but it’s a rather annoying punishment for misaligning a “jump”.



And the final door jump has a really wonky hitbox for ramming into that round torch and falling into the pit. Be careful, and maybe aim slightly diagonally.



Pooka is our MVP of treasure collecting.



The next room is a choose your own adventure of demon doors. Which path contains the least conflict?



But first be sure to use Marivel’s electric tool on a barely perceptible block to the left.



This will open up a hidden door at the end of the room.



Still have to make it through these doors, though. The far right path looks like the easiest…



Nope! It was a trick! Dammit!



Yeah, that is a cat doing a handstand. How is that considered a threat? Are we curtailing a super-intelligent cat uprising?



Hidden door time.



A Brad-based chest!



Here is Brad’s final Arm, the EZ Missile.



Brad’s final ability is a hit-all attack for the guy that has the least hit-all abilities on the team.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

The Rail Gun is still Brad’s most powerful Arm, but the EZ Missile is ideal for large groups. It’s a final ability that isn’t exactly going to set the world on fire, but it is going to incinerate a few monster mobs.



If Filgaia’s core was at all warm, we’d probably also be on fire by now.



This room initially appears to be similar to the previous one…



But it’s actually a series of zigzagging corridors.



You also have to walk across a few doors to get where you’re going, so don’t just eliminate every door you see.



After that… a long hallway. Okay?



How in blazes did Irving make it down all these stairs? Did Altaecia carry him?



Another long hallway! Are we getting close?



Close to more stairs, that is.



This room is fun. Technically, you don’t have to interact with a single demon door in this section.



But you just know there’s treasure somewhere around here!



One door hides another spark block for Marivel…



And that opens another hidden room.



Rising Nova is, naturally, Ashley’s final Arm.



Shooting and cutting? Who can stop us now!?



Rising Nova is Ashley’s rail gun, and can do an awful lot of damage. Mind you, most times Ashley is still better off switching into Knight Blazer mode, but it’s good to have some options that are less FP-intensive.



You know, it kind of sucks that someone built all these stairs without handrails.



Here we are! Last stop!



Time for a boss!



This is the… Not midboss… 75% boss?



Are you a dragon? Do you know our airship?



Manufestu is pretty similar to his crab buddy upstairs, and isn’t much to write home about. I guess this is the last non-final boss in the game? That could be a niche.



As you might expect, this terrible thunder lizard uses physical and fire attacks.



It also knows an instant death attack.



It is also dead. Moving on.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

“Did we just kill a god accidentally?”
“Probably not…”



If you couldn’t tell from the geography of the rooms (and so many stairs), Spiral Tower is a spiral leading down. And pretty far down, too!



Journey to the Center of the Filgaia.



“It’s a lot less… pleasant.”



It is simply divine.



The final Guardian we encounter is a gigantic puddle of blue mud. That’s going to be an interesting summon.



Incidentally, this was never actually mentioned in dialogue, but there is a book back in Baskar that makes direct reference to this mud god.



This somehow isn’t the only Playstation 1 JRPG that features a mud god, and I really have to wonder how that happened.



So, yes, apparently we had to venture all the way down here because the Kuiper Belt apparently spiritually attacks the planet from the inside out.



And the Spiral Tower ends in a teleporter that will put us down in the muck.



Hope everyone brought comfortable shoes!



In a technical sense, the absolute final dungeon is Glaive Le Gable, the guardian that stands above all other guardians as the Creator Guardian. Side note: Glaive Le Gable is never mentioned in the franchise again, save as a reference to a misnamed action figure in Wild Arms 3.



The finalest dungeon is basically a series of extremely long hallways. You might want to make your own map, as the scale of the place is huge.



And there are sealed doors! That means puzzles!



The constant straightaways are ideal for Kanon skating.



These discolored pillars are something to note.



How about we play with a few?



Rotating the pillars into their proper positions will open doors elsewhere. Sometimes it’s a nearby door. Sometimes not so much.



And if you didn’t think monsters were about, you weren’t paying attention.



When there is more than one pillar, you have to rotate both until they’re facing the proper direction (usually toward a nearby door).



And then we’ve got a way forward.



The final save point!



I haven’t really been keeping track within the LP, but it took about 21 hours to reach this, the final room before the final boss. That’s how long Wild Arms 2 takes when you’re cheating your ass off. Reminder: I had to “reboot” this entire playthrough, and I really rushed about the first third of the game.



The final room contains more locked doors.



But there are a few that are unlocked.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Each of the rooms contain a final armor for a different character (save Marivel). The rooms’ locks are all tied to the various pillars elsewhere in the dungeon, so it’s very likely you’ll hit this area with one or two already opened without really trying.



Oh, and since there are six rooms but only five characters receiving armor, one of the rooms contains a Full Libra accessory. That will prevent all status effects, so it’s a pretty good get.



There is no way I’m missing out on the best armor in the game, so I hit the dungeon again to find those other switches.



I’m not going to screenshot the whole adventure, but suffice to say it took a little bit of time to find every last pillar (and not just constantly route myself back to a pillar I’ve already hit).



Aw, the final dungeon contains color-swaps of Balloons, some of the first monsters ever encountered.



Okay, now the doors are open.



Lilka’s final armor is a bridal gown? That doesn’t seem very fitting. Literally.



Now we’re ready to have our final save before the final battle. At this point, assuming you’ve opened all the doors, you’ve got all the items and armor that can be found in the final dungeon(s). There is no exit spell in Wild Arms 2 (boo), so feel free to hoof it all the way back through Glaive Le Gabel and Spiral Tower so you can face the optional bosses with maximum gear.



Or don’t do that, and face the final battle.



Who could ever simply walk into the finale?



Yep!

Next time on Wild Arms 2: “We didn't win or lose. It's just over, finished.”

Or grodier.

If you decide to postpone the Pokémon Let's Go Eevee FGC next week to talk about Trials of Mana, I will both understand and accept that decision. I'd be playing it myself if I had that Switch yet.

Anyway, I'm not sure I ever commented on the thread before this, but I'm looking forward to the end of Wild ARMs 2. Pretty sure I peaced out around the blue mud place, which I didn't realize was a stone's throw away from the final boss.

I haven't completely played through "Trials of Mana" practically since when Wild Arms 2 was released, so I'm taking my sweet time with that one. I certainly won't be done with it within the week.

Or I hope I won't...

Gotta learn to savor these things...

Previously on Wild Arms 2: Liz & Ard only appeared in 10% of this Let’s Play. It has been an abject failure.



But now we’re in the final chamber of the final dungeon, so maybe we can turn this whole thing around.



And some dude is talking!



Oh, sweet. Guess we just have to do some punching and we’ll be home in time for Jeopardy.



Unfortunately, Irving’s brilliant plan has already hit a snag: the Kuiper Belt is too much for the vessel, so it is growing uncontrollable, physical roots.



So, anyway, new mission: beat up Kuiper and its roots. I guess this also means…

Wild Arms Mission #27
Journey to the center of the planet on Irving’s orders
Status: Success!
Notes: You don’t have to be morally compromised to take a nice walk down a million stairs.



Oh, and there’s a bit of time limit on this one: Irving’s will is the only thing keeping the errant dimension in check. Uh… try to stay focused, Irving!



“Ashley…. Things are a little complicated right now… Could we please save questions for later?”



Once again, everyone faces Marivel when Ashley is talking. I assume this is some weird coding regarding the “extra” character.



Anyway, time to fight some roots.



I suppose for a little added “final” challenge, the entire party will not be available for the final battle. Three different fighters will have to peel off and fight each individual root separately, and then the remainder will battle the big boy at the end of all things.



My party is, you know, practically invincible, so I didn’t put too much thought into my different groups. I decided that Ashley is going to face the final battle with Lilka and Tim, because the idea of either of those two kids fighting alone is scary.



So each of the solo characters wander off to their own destinies.



Everyone gets their own little “lead up” area. It’s not… anything, but it is a good time to say “a boss is coming, is this character equipped?”



And the big, foreboding doors should indicate what comes next.



The game gets all the walking out of the way first, so, even though Brad has hit the boss, we won’t fight it until the other two reach their destinations.



But that happens pretty quickly.



Marivel reaches her door, and we’re back to Brad’s battle.



This fella looks pretty friendly!



So each of the Root battles are 1-on-1.



These battles aren’t necessarily hard, but the solo nature of the fights makes them more annoying than you’d expect.



For reasons that will be clear shortly, I should have chosen Brad as my last fighter. Oh well. Since Ashley is doomed to the “real” final boss, only Brad has the option of completely unloading all of his Arms ammo on a root. This will be Brad’s last battle, and the game doesn’t (technically) save afterwards, so feel free to go nuts with resources.



A move called “Galactic Explosion” is not as exciting as expected.



First root down.



Second root up.



Oh, did I forget to post the album image for First Root? Well here’s Second Root. They all look the same.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

I had totally forgotten Kanon lists “exorcist” as her occupation.



So each of the roots are barely different, but progressively more difficult. This root (and its big brother) will start using status effects.



For this reason, you likely want to start using your better fighters for the latter fights. Or just use your faster fighters, because healing before the root acts is a good way to stay alive.



Kanon didn’t have any issues, though.



Incidentally, as these are these character’s final battles, no EXP, Gella, or items are obtained after each fight. This seems weirdly solemn…



Third time’s a charm.



I told you they all look the same.



Marivel… doesn’t even know what she’s looking at.



I really should not have chosen Marivel as my third exterminator, as she is weak and fairly limited for offensive options.



And she’s so vulnerable to galactic explosions!



But, in the end, cheating my way to being ridiculously overleveled won the day.



Defeating Third Root gives us a glimpse of how things are looking outside.



It seems everyone is gathering at Irving’s flying castle. This is a good plan. I think. I’ve never been in a plane in a hurricane…



The King has exactly nothing to do, but he’s cheering on ARMS.



Marina interjects that Ashley and ARMS are not destined heroes, but just some dudes who occasionally crash at her bakery.



“Well, not like Kate and Amy. Those two are disasters.”



Anywho, let us pray.



Man, it is so appropriate that this guy was named after Cyclops.



“Well, I was going to lie down and die, but, sure, that’s a good alternative.”



Like the separated trio earlier, Ashley has a little bit of walking left before the final battle.



Oh! And a puzzle!



This is one of those rotating switch puzzle dealys where you press one button, and it impacts the two closest buttons, too.



The idea is to get all of the pillars simultaneously facing their purple bits toward the final door. It’s not that difficult, and there are no random encounters in this area, so it’s just a matter of trial and error if you’re not great at playing with blocks.



Aw, that was the last puzzle of Wild Arms 2.



Aw, here’s the last giant dick of Wild Arms 2.

CONTINUED NEXT POST

“That is what my mouth is saying, Irving.”



“Why the f^#& is the center of the planet filled with god-mud!?”



Buuuuuut?



“I am the only person on this planet that actually uses that telescope over in Sielje. Every other person in that building is making out. Every. Single. One.”



Lesson: if you form a committee to save the world, then the world is going to burn. Practical example: Global climate change.



Liz & Ard?



Oh, right. Yeah, those guys.



“Particularly if the threat contains distinct generals with whacky weapons and quirky personalities.”



Ashley is Superman!



Global peace through global strife!



“And morality is subjective. God, take a philosophy course, Ashley.”



“Which makes it marginally good.”



This is literally true. Ashley has been consistent on his stance on sacrifice since his introduction.



Irving would have become a big damn hero if he could, but the magical sword wouldn’t let him. There’s an interesting commentary on “the chosen one”, here.



Anywho, time for Altaecia’s womb to explode.



This… can’t be good.



Yes, yes, we’ve been over this like sixty times. Gotta give the universe a “body”.



Oh. Turns out Irving has been considering this option since literally before the game started. Ashley could have been in Altaecia’s position if the opening had gone a little differently (Or a lot differently, depending on how you think we got to here).



“Well, yeah, but she was okay with it. Mostly.”



Brad just sneezed, and he doesn’t know why.



Welp, that’s horrifying.



Time for the final boss.



This is one of those rare cases where the illustration is worse than the polygon model. This ain’t no “concept art” final boss.



“I spoke to your Great Aunt! She’s not pleased!”



“I don’t even expect you to… Tim? Are you vomiting? Yeah, that’s fair, too.”

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Try thinking harder, Irving!



Localization Team, could you have maybe chosen a different word than “slash”? Just something to think about.







“And I’m guessing she didn’t foresee anything like this, but if she did, wow, I really wish she would have said something.”



Oh, yeah, Altaecia. It really sucks that Irving’s sister is such a nonentity in this story, and then the game hinges entirely on her being a tragic sacrifice, and then she literally never says a word while the boys talk about what she must be feeling. This is some special kind of fridging here. Or at least it would be, if a single character in this cast cared about Altaecia.



So, anyway, “let’s fight together” means that we’re going to be walloping this monster now.



Kuiper Core really does resemble a fetus with some monstrous amalgamation of a reproductive system and a JRPG angel.



It is supposed to be disturbing in every way, and, for a Playstation 1 title, Wild Arms 2 does really pull it off.



Regarding the actual fight, Kuiper basically uses upgraded forms of its roots’ various attacks.



There’s nothing too horrible here, but you are going to want to have your main healer equipped with the Full Libra so as to negate any nasty status effects.



The final boss uses appropriately final boss-like attacks. Get ready to be exploded in multiple ways… even if it only knocks off like 1,000 HP.



As far as offense, just use what you got. The shoulder targets have elemental weaknesses, but just hit the core itself with your strongest non-elemental attacks.



And, pretty soon, this crazy dimension that has threatened the entire planet for half the game will be gone.



This battle actually yields EXP (and only EXP). Is there still another fight to go?



Nobody says a word post-battle. I guess they’re just happy the creepy, muscular dungeon went away.



Everybody returns from their respective root jobs.



Lilka, dammit.

Actually, come to think of it…

Wild Arms Mission #28
Destroy the Kuniper Belt! It’s been our goal for a while!
Status: Success!
Notes: Sacrifices must be made.



I do appreciate how Wild Arms 2 lets the kids be the kids of the group.



Brad laying down some hard truths.



And Kanon with some literal truths.



And Ashley isn’t all that excited about any of this.



And then he explodes with negative emotions. I had the same thing happen when I first joined twitter.



Yeah… uh… this isn’t good.



We just going to make the Earthbound parallels explicit at this point?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

And now we’re… on the moon?



Good question!



Oh, that’s no moon, it’s a planet that has been totally turned to ash by an unstoppable roaring fire of destruction.



It has been a long-ass time since Ashley’s inner-murderous voice surfaced, so you’ll be forgiven for forgetting about that particular plot-point.



Yes, Ashley’s inner-voice was the Blaze of Disaster this whole time. We… uh… I think we already knew that, Ashley. It was explained multiple times.



Ashley was so super sad after the last battle that Lord Blazer ate a veritable buffet of negative emotions, and now he’s ready to fully absorb Ashley’s body and destroy the planet. This is exactly why men are always so afraid of showing emotions! It’s the demons from Hell thing!



“Yes. I literally just said that. Have you always been this dense? Was I responsible for your INT stat?”



“Don’t worry, Ashley, a whole planet of jerks helped me out, too.”



“Does widdle baby Ashley need his swordy wordy?”



Yeah, Ashley couldn’t draw the Master Sword until he was possessed by the very demon it was meant to slay. This kind of thing never happens to Link…



“Brad’s a mere human, and he could probably draw the sword.”
“Yeah, but he’s stronk.”



The history books really failed to convey how the Blaze of Disaster was an absolute asshole.



“But I don’t see any other weapons around here…”



Man, this is going to be another one of those updates where the word “hero” loses all meaning…



We can be heroes (but just for one battle).



“Did you and Brad have a conversation on the way down the tower?”
“Maybe.”



Yeah! Form that Spirit Bomb!



“Mostly because none of us have twin sisters.”



So, yeah, as you have likely seen coming at this point, the souls (or something) of ARMS all start shining…



And join with Ashley over at the Destruction World.



“Or I’m having a heart attack. And that would be a perfectly valid response to this situation, too.”



I wonder if OG ARMS would have survived if they all tried to pull out the sword together instead of single file…



And now for the final-final boss.



The unknowable disaster that nearly destroyed the entire planet and was banished to another dimension for millennia… has wings for ears?



Oh snap, Ashley got a makeover!

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Yes, it appears Ashley has now adopted Anastasia’s fashion sense. Consider this the final form of Knight Blazer: this is Ashley with the power of Argetlahm, but without the influence of Lord Blazer.



Ashley retains his stats, but cannot change his equipment. Luckily, anything he equipped before should still impact the battle (like, say, an accessory that negates status effects). Also, the music playing during this battle is a remix of the introductory music/main theme, and it is amazeballs.



All of Ashley’s skills have been replaced with the same abilities Anastasia had during the flashback dungeon. This is very convenient, as Anastasia’s host of healing spells (and her Re-Life ability) are very useful now.



In a way, this is a scripted battle. In another, more accurate way, though, Lord Blazer is going to try to tear Ashley a new one. Keep your HP up!



The “trick” to this battle is to continually use Impulse, a 25 FP skill that utilizes the power of humanity. How does that work?



Well…



Each “Impulse” summons a different scene featuring someone from during the quest. First up is Anastasia, as we need someone to compliment Ashley’s new mittens.



“Which is confusing, because it’s a one-person sword. Did you read the manual? There’s supposed to be a manual!”



Each Impulse does a healthy chunk of damage to Lord Blazer, so you know you’re on the right track.



Incidentally, Sword Mage Ashley has some stat buffing moves, but they’re really not useful when Lord Blazer dispels them every other turn.



So the basic priorities of this battle are 1. Keep Ashley healed, then 2. Use Impulse when 25 FP is available, and if not 3. Swing around that sword until you’ve got 25 HP. It’s not completely mindless, and, as far as “JRPG Final Boss Scripted Battles” go, it’s pretty interesting. At least you’re not casting Stone on some magical tick…

Also, Zephyr’s medium will confer an ability that instantly restores 25 FP, so maybe show up with that equipped.



As mentioned, each Impulse shows us a different person/group. Colette is with the Baskar folk.



Terry the Good Boy leads the scholars of Sielje.



Prince Noel of Guild Galad is just happy someone remembered he existed.



Maribel, Alby the Dog, and Billy are all tired of saying “hero”.



Tony and Scott are repping the support staff of ARMS.



Lord Blazer is still doing his best to kill Ashley and, eventually, everyone that has ever lived.



And Marina, inexplicably and silently flanked by Irving and whatshername, claims that she loves the uncertain future that is possible after Lord Blazer is obliterated.



“What’s that? There’s a ghost behind me?”



That really seems to do it, as Marina’s Impulse does the most damage possible.



And thus was Lord Blazer exploded into rainbows.



Dude is just gonna rock out and play his new magical sword like a guitar.

Wild Arms Mission #29
Save the whole damn world
Status: Success!
Notes: No pyrrhic victories here! We saved everyone and permanently defeated an unholy evil that could previously only be sealed away. We are the champions, my friiiiiiiiends…



And Ashley is returned to Filgaia as plain ol’ Ashley.



Ashley claims that he wasn’t the hero, it was him and everyone else.



Shut-up, Brad. Just… never again, okay?

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Marivel claims she wasn’t a hero because it would be too much of a hassle. I should save that reply for if anyone ever asks me if I want to do another Let’s Play…



Not pictured: about an hour of walking up a billion stairs.



“And we shall never tell anyone that there is apparently a tower that leads straight down to the muddy depths of God.”



A lovely reverse of that bubble animation that got us down here…



And our party returns.



Though things aren’t exactly looking great.



This is the one time Colette is justifiably worried.



Each character gets a (fairly long) soliloquy over the ending. Here’s Tim’s…

“That was the moment the strain and tension finally slackened. More than having destroyed the Kuiper Belt or Lord Blazer, seeing everyone's laughter again makes me realize it's really over. But you all aren't the only ones laughing. I have someone waiting for me and when I heard someone saved a place for me to return to--I broke into laughter too. Colette said ‘thanks’ to me, so I said ‘thanks’ back. That's not so strange, is it? Because in that moment that's what I wanted to say.”

Those two are so cute.



Apparently it is up to Ashley to tell the ARMS support staff what happened with Irving.



After whatever he told them, ARMS decides to have a 4-arms salute in honor of their marginally insane leader.



And Valeria Chateau continues flying through the skies. Which, side note, the skies are back. Yay.



Kanon...

“And so everything was disclosed. At the beginning and end of this battle was a sin named Valeria. The ‘sin’ was called a ‘hero’. If the lives in Filgaia survived because of this sin, then its continued life at its atonement. Those who can atone are... The cross that is too heavy to bear alone is no longer so when everyone on this star supports it. Sleep now, the blood of Valeria. No one needs a ‘hero’ anymore now that they've realized their might. If the darkness meant to destroy Filgaia's future is dismantled, the chant of peace hoped for will be heard.”

Kanon isn’t planning on having any kids, so she’s the last of Anastasia’s “heroic” bloodline. I guess she’s going to inherit Valeria Chateau now? Maybe she could do something good with that.



Apparently it wasn’t in the budget to show such a thing happening, but the many towns of the world got wrecked during the finale. A relief and rebuilding effort is happening across the globe.



And Marina is apparently helping. Or maybe she’s just yelling at people.



Speaking of yelling, Marivel is helping out, too.



Though she should probably grab some shade, as the sun is coming up again for the first time since ARMS battled Odessa.



Marivel…

“No matter what you say, humans are strange creatures. Besides being frail, people get lost along the way and makes false moves. Then they sometimes don't realize their mistakes and hurt those who are close. Yet at the same time, they know how to link arms and band together. If you ask why, must you answer so? While acknowledging their own weaknesses, when they take aim at a far goal, they join hands. Those who extend a hand and those who take the hand, can't be done without trust. Hold on there just a minute. It's not clear if humans are weak or strong from this. Well then, I'll explain it. A Crimson Noble's time is eternal.”

Marivel is not going to go back to sleep, and is going to study humanity for the rest of forever. Incidentally, I have no idea if this scene doesn’t appear if Marivel never formally joins the party. It’s not like she isn’t a part of ARMS before she starts actually fighting with ARMS…



Brad is a one-man building machine.



A handkerchief (or something) flies off Alby, and Billy leans to pick it up, apparently showing signs he may be recovering. Hooray!



Brad…

“A broken clock starts to move to some rhythm. A clock that had stopped like that starts to move. Stories always start suddenly. Focus your eyes, listen closely, and pay attention. The life starting now is even more unpredictable than the battlefield. To be honest, if I were thrown out on my own, I'd be apprehensive. Yet, that doesn't mean I'd just stop. You're on my side. Better still, I have friends who'll fight beside me. Next time I'll have them help. A ‘hero’ is very cool, but I'd never be able to fill that role. So, it's all a sham, I guess. That's not bad either.”

Brad doesn’t need to be a hero, he just needs friends. Duh.



Lilka is hanging out at the Sielje telescope. This was an important spot to her sister… and also a place she was damned to clean should she survive her perilous quest.



Terry the Good Boy is helping. I think.



“For things to change, to go from the past to the future, is for time to pass. It is not only me. Everyone will eventually go on their way. I know. I'm not crying. I'm OK. I'm cool. That's because it's not ‘good-bye’ but ‘till we meet again’. No matter where you go, it's not an ‘end’ but a ‘beginning’. I'm happy that we're all departing for our new lives together. I mean...I was lucky enough to meet everyone here who I love with all my heart.”

Lilka, for the last time: you were never cool.



And our ragtag gang comes to the crossroads.



Bye everybody! Have a good existence for the next five minutes until the Playstation is turned off!

CONTINUED NEXT POST

Kanon is too busy looking for Schala to say anything.



Ashley, naturally, gets our last little recap:

“The King of Meria Boule has officially announced the dissolution of ARMS. Even if this didn't happen, we all would have eventually pursued our own destinies. So, today's ‘good-bye’ isn't sad for me. Even if it was only for a moment, our hearts were once joined together as one. And even if we're not ‘heroes’, we accomplished a major feat. If we join our souls, we can accomplish things even a noble ‘hero’ can't do. No matter where we go, if we join our hearts, we'll always be together.”

Say it with me now, everybody:

The real ARMS was the friends we made along the way.



And we’ll take one final look at the rebuilt town of Meria.



Everything is as it was, complete with thieving kittens and roof holes.



Even the bakery is back in tiptop shape.



Though its residents might be a little different.



“Less… demon-y.”



D’awww.



And, with what I assume is a yet another mistranslation…



We hit the credits. The credits run along slides of various anime-tastic scenes, like…



Ashley baking bread like a Valkyrie…



Lilka studying as hard as her little pea-brain will let her…



Brad setting up a log cabin so he can be just as gay as humanly possible with Billy…



Tim and Colette feeding cows for some reason…



Kanon doing the typical Western thing of trashing everyone in a bar and then having a beer…



Marivel employing Scott and inspiring an entire Blazblue character into existence..



And a mysterious desk containing pictures of various ARMS folks. Given the Tim/Lilka selfie, I have to assume one of the kids had the camera.



And it all closes on a picture of a certain twin couple of potential sociopaths.



Lookin’ good, Meria!



Lookin’ good, sky!



Lookin’ good, exposition!



Oh, the sword actually survived being absorbed by Ashley for a solid game.



“Oh man, remember Scott’s birthday party? And how nobody showed up except for Tim? Good times.”



“Yeah, I know, I read the narration a moment ago.”



Aw, they used the magical sword as a grave marker. Obviously, Irving and Altaecia are technically buried at the center of the planet resting peacefully ventilated by about ten thousand bullet holes.

CONCLUDED NEXT POST

Ah ha ha, Excalibur humor.



Ashley and Marina arrive, babies in tow. That’s probably new.



I find it kind of amusing that Kanon and Marivel both move in to look at babies. No one can resist the siren’s call of cooing.



Reminder: the sky still exists.



“Tim and I were just talking about that a year ago!”



If you haven’t noticed, Marivel is back in her anti-sun gear. I always appreciate when a character returns to their “covert” clothing after being revealed. She wore that old outfit for so long!



Aw, Marina got her ordinary life with a non-monster boyfriend (/baby daddy).



Side note: a pair of babies is absolute proof that Ashley is one of the few JRPG heroes with working equipment… and I ain’t talkin’ about his Shootin’ Star. … Or maybe I am.



“How many total NPCs were there? Yes, all 200 of us Filgaians saved the world.”



“Fatboy and Slim. Next question.”



Oh, good. It’s nice to hear Ashley remembered that children are supposed to have names.



“Shut and Thehellup, Tim. It’s Greek.”



“Agatha and Christie.”



Pure and Fur?



And, fun fact, Ashley doesn’t actually say the names of the kids. Boo. Given the context clues, and the whole “twins” thing, one can assume he was a jackass and named the kids after Irving and Altaecia.



And with an ominous statement that might just be a replacement for the ol’ “a winner is you”…



We’re done, ladies and gentlemen! Thanks for playing and/or reading Wild Arms 2!



Next time on Wild Arms 2: We’re not done yet!

I think it's worth noting that Anastasia never had kids (one assumes, given the way her arc played out), so the "bloodline of the hero" was nothing more than the Valeria family clutching to the achievements of a person they abandoned to die saving the world. Besides perhaps making Anastasia the exception to the rule, it's another one of those small details pointing out that the Valeria family has long been full of shit.