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Make a Memory: Let's Play Wild Arms 3

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Fortune Gear is optional insomuch as you can go to two distinct places, and you have your choice of which. The next update will be the other choice. But, ultimately, you have to go to both places eventually at around this point in the game to proceed. So, one way or another, you are fighting Janus at this point in the plot.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
And speaking of other choices, we are going to proceed with that on September 20, Street Preaching Day. Two bugs multiply into four in one day. They further multiply into eight. If it takes thirty days to cover Filgaia with bugs, how many days will it take to cover half of Filgaia? The Ark of Destiny preacher said that the answer is 29 days. I wonder what he was trying to prove.

Chapter 24: The Self-Righteous Gemstones

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Bang Bang Lucky Janus
Bang Bang Lucky Janus
C'est lui qu'a le truc pour nous étonner
Bang Bang Lucky Janus
Bang Bang Lucky Janus
C'est un homme qui n'a peur de personne
Même pas des Virginia

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So we’re back at Humphrey’s Peak collecting ourselves before the next mission.

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And now we’re done.

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Please be aware that just outside Humphrey’s Peak, there are Jorts with two tails that stand on their forepaws.

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And the animation for Wild Arms 3’s sleep spell is a circle of sheep running around the target. This update is shaping up to be adorable!

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The main reason I am noting a random encounter (other than the adorbs factor) is that after equipping the Luck Medium and taking a nap at home, Clive now has BEST luck. Assuming I keep that going with Clive’s equipment, this means that Clive will be opening monster treasure chests for the rest of the game. Disarming a trap is 100% luck based, and, while BEST luck is not an absolute guarantee of success, it does mean Clive will be exploded by traps slightly less.

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The Gemstone Cave that Clive mentioned a few updates back is north of HP, and requires a horse to jump the crevasse. While you are guaranteed to have a horse at this point (you needed one to start Chapter 2), this may be the first time in the game you are using a Call Whistle to summon your steed past that stupid sand dungeon.

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And
here we are.

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Before we enter, just going to note this weird “island” that is just beyond the doorway. Is this another dungeon like the Sand Canal that connects to another location? The answer is: eventually!

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Well, at least it is pretty enough.

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You live on a desert planet. Our “September” is probably freezing for you guys.

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Oh, it’s metaphorical.

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So we have only ever found Guardians in shrines dedicated to said deities, but, sure, let’s explore this empty cave with the intention of maybe finding an errant Guardian…

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Speaking of shrines, when was the last time we explored a straight-up cave? Clive had one in his intro…

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Gemstone Cave’s proximity to Humphrey’s Peak seems to indicate that it is intended to be visited before Fortune Gear. Another sign? If you score all the Migrant Seals up to this point, and include the one at Fortune Gear, the encounters here will mostly be green, “beneath you” affairs.

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And this is a shame, as this place as has fairly unique fights.

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Meet Rock Baboon and Hodac the Lizard. If you are fighting just one of these monsters, it is a standard battle. But…

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These monsters do not play well together. If you leave a Rock Baboon and Hodac alone together, they will fight.

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They absolutely will eventually kill each other, and will only fight your party after their opposite number is defeated. As a result, Gemstone Cave is one of the few dungeons where you could conceivably fight every random encounter, and never take a hit.

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Though you may find conflict in other places…

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Maya! Depending on how you handled the “optional” content up to this point, this could be your first dungeon immediately after Maya’s rescue at the end of the laboratory.

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“Hey! I got your texts! I was going to respond as soon as we stopped fighting lizards!”

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Well, this place is called Gemstone Cave…

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Virginia always seems to have confidence issues when Maya is around.

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“You are always so vague! I don't know what your intention is, but one thing is for sure. You perpetually appear wherever I go, and pester me!”
Yes, Maya. “Pester”.

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… Maya, you are making every double entendre too easy.

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“Well excuuuuuse me, Princess.”

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Virginia is trying really hard to tell Maya about this whole “we are saving the world from demons” thing.

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“The planet! You live on!”

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Everyone knows Maya is just doing this because she likes seeing Virginia flustered, right?

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There is only going to be some light gunplay between friends here.

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It’s a race to the gems! Or… it’s a normal dungeon! Nobody felt like making this dungeon a timer-based affair.

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Step one: blow up a series of rocks.

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Step two: profit.

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Advance a screen, and it is time for a science lesson about birds gems.

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“Gems are composed of life energy of the planet. This life energy can be likened to the blood of living organisms. This coagulation of the planet's lifeblood becomes what we know as gems.”
Just so you know (it will be confirmed within this very update), Clive is absolutely not only talking about the big ol’ rocks you find all over this cave, but also the translucent gems that appear in every dungeon/cave/monster arena. The concept behind the white and orange gems is that the planet is helping you out with some bonus VIT in any dangerous area. Thanks, Filgaia!

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Oh, and those elemental gems you get after battles for killing creatures with magic, too. Anyway, having learned a new thing, we can proceed.

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See? These gems. They’re real. Not just a gameplay feature.

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This cave is pretty boring, all told.

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It is appropriately “cave-y” and twisting and random, though.

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Maya is like a cat. She just kind of haphazardly shows up, and you never know if you are going to get to rub her belly or eat some claws.

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Claws encounter.

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A boulder blocks your path. Command?

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As much as I enjoy Maya being our ally, I do appreciate cat & mouse antics.

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So bombs?

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No bombs.

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This is the same puzzle as Trask back at Ka Dingel.

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Use Virginia’s fire, follow it with Gallows’s ice…

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And then you can blow it to smithereens.

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Moving on.

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So many gems in this whaddyacallit cave.

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Maya does not loot any of the treasure chests this time around (remember the empty chests from her first dungeon?), but she wouldn’t be able to get to this one anyway. Launch a steady doll to score some loot.

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This one is inaccessible altogether, though. Guess we’ll come back to this dungeon later…

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“As I mentioned earlier, gems can be likened to the blood exuding from the planet. Blood that has coagulated. Which in turn means that this place is full of wounds. Wounds translate into the decay of land--an impoverished planet. Gems can be found within ruins and buildings for this very reason.”
Jet is still working on the definition of “coagulated”.

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Filgaia sad.

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“We know what good planet feels like. This place is strictly bad planet.”

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“Gems are ostensibly supposed to grow in size with the passage of time...Even with the large quantity of gems in this cave, the actual size does not differ from other locations. Perhaps my professor's theory is true...It may seem preposterous, but there is evidence here to back it up.”
We may not find a Guardian here, but it looks Clive picked up on some clues…

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And we’re not done yet.

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Yes it could be interesting to see what is…

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So much for having a choice.

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You know this puzzle from many a JRPG…

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This is the basement, and you have to figure out which holes up top correspond to where you will fall down here.

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Find the right holes, and you’ll earn some treasure.

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Mess up and keep using the absolutely wrong hole, and you’ll be here all day. Guess what I did…

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If you are somehow using this Let’s Play as a FAQ, this is technically the hole you want. It is marked by being between these two gem formations.

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Note that even when you get it right, you will want to get it right twice, because…

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The right hole allows you to drop further down to a treasure you wouldn’t otherwise gain. The amulet confers an ability that will block all status ailments so long as you are guarding. Given some of the bosses (and one big sidequest) are based entirely on ruining your day with ailments, this would be useful for Virginia or Gallows to stay healthy and ready to heal the whole party.

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Okay, now we’ve grabbed the treasure, gone back upstairs, fallen in the right hole again, and we’re ready to make progress. Please do not note the in-game time indicating how long this area took.

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But at least I’m not the only one who was having issues.

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I think we might have a lead now…

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This isn’t Brave Fencer Musashi! We can’t just nap anywhere!

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Interestingly enough, given the Virginia x Maya relationship takes center stage anytime her family appears, the rest of the party rarely gets to discuss Maya and her hijinks. Whatever character is in the lead gets a minor comment at this point, and while Jet and Clive have pat responses (Jet literally just says “Gimme a break”), it is appreciated that Gallows gets the unique…

“She sure is feisty. She's taking it all out on us even though it's her mistake. I feel sorry for her companions...”

This is being noted because even prominent (failure of a) lothario Gallows isn’t going to touch Maya with a ten-foot pole. He knows she is spoken for.

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Not much dungeon left to go now.

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If you didn’t think to save after that stupid hole puzzle, now would be a good time.

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Because here’s the boss battle.

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They appear behind us now, as they lost time for some reason.

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Oh yeah. Where is Virginia’s favorite blonde?

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Virginia! You are messing up her planned entrance! She put so much effort into this finale…

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A… book? Oh yeah, she was taunting us with a book at the end of Serpent’s Coils, too.

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What? She’s a wizard now?

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A fighting wizard?

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Virginia isn’t into unwarranted cosplay!

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Loving that Wonder Witch Maya gets her own series of unique character portraits.

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“Milady possesses supernatural powers where she can convert information into her own special abilities. Even nonsensical information can be processed through the medium of a book to wield unlimited powers!”
Oh, this is so good…

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Maya’s magic power is that she can channel information into power, even if the “information” is fictional.

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So just be glad there aren’t any Galactus comics on Filgaia.

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This “ability” is simultaneously the most overpowered thing you can imagine, and appropriate for a humorous character that is obviously only ever going to use it for goofy reasons.

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Is that the expression you’re seeing?

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Alfred the Boy Wonder is the one with empathy in this party.

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Having learned Maya’s secret powers, Virginia is going to be distracted for this entire battle thinking about books she could buy her girlfriend for… Uh… less combative reasons.

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Maya & Friends Boss Battle #2.

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All of the support characters are exactly the same as last time. As far as I can see, they do not have any new moves between them, and their weaknesses are all the same, too. This means Todd is still your A priority, as his healing and confusion attacks are a tremendous threat. Remind him his afro is flammable.

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Maya, meanwhile, is a completely different beast. Appropriate to her current attire, she will cast a random spell every round.

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Note that all spells will be attack-all, so your entire party will take the brunt of every hit. This would be a good fight to remember you have a variety of elemental guards available through your mediums.

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Fire and ice are particularly useful, as Shady the Cat still breaths those elements.

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Alfred still only has exactly one attack.

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You might think you could easily neuter Maya’s magical abilities by casting Reflect, but…

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She is quick to counter that with Eraser. Casting any buffs are not a complete waste, as Maya has to use a turn to cast Eraser in the first place, but it is kind of a zero sum move.

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And just because it was mentioned last update…

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Pickpocket/Steal is so useless on bosses. You know Maya has something! She’s Maya.

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Oh, and Maya will cast Reflect on her own team members, so exploiting Shady’s elemental weakness is not advised for fear of it bouncing back.

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Wonder Witch Maya does have a cute hit animation, though. I don’t think she is used to heels.

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I am almost certain you don’t technically have to defeat the whole family, just Maya. But knocking everyone down will result in greater EXP gains.

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Is this going to be another story fight that ends with our party knocked out?

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We’ll find out!

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After the break.

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Guess we’re safe.

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“Lady, don’t go nuts. We don’t even want your stupid gems.”

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Maya almost kills us all for absolutely nothing.

… Sounds about right.

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“Why thank you, sir.”

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“One more thing…”

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Yep! Just going to refill your encounter gauge.

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Should have listened to Clive.

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Also note that Maya changed out of her witch outfit between scene transitions.

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“And can you tell me where I will find actual valuable gems?”

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Is… is that really an answer?

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You trying to crash the gem market, Clive?

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Just go ahead and keep being mysterious about your professor’s theories.

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Virginia doesn’t give a damn. Tell me about your hopes and dreams, Maya.

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Material Girl.

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See? Canon magically devoured gems.

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“The sparkle I'm looking for is the -real sparkle-. I don't care how many false leads I have to follow. One of these days I will find it. And I will shine because of it…”
"One of these days, I'm gonna tell ya 'bout my ROMANTIC dream!"

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Anywho, gotta go. Off to find the part of Filgaia where they speak French.

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“Don’t forget! We’re doing brunch at that café in Jolly Roger on Tuesday!”

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Welp, the ultimate reward for this quest is a fat lotta nothing.

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No Guardian, no big treasure, just the nonsense we found while exploring. See why I did literally everything else available first? My garden was growing while we were going through this trash bin. Serves us right... who would ever think to find a guardian here...

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And we’re going to call it as we get back to (Clive's) home again. It’s been fun, Maya!

Next time on Wild Arms 3: The quest for the Frozen Flame.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Sorry, we're not going to see any more Maya and her great portraits today on September 27, Anvil Day. I know it's Anvil Day, but I don't know which anvil it refers to. There was a female Drifter duo by that name, but I'm not quite sure.

Chapter 25: Get a Job

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Nobody got any gems while Maya read a book. Ho-hum.

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And now we are back at Humphrey’s Peak. As an additional recap: we started a few quests here after being wiped out by Asgard and the Prophets, and all we really have to show for it is one more medium/dead Guardian.

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But speaking of those prophets, returning to HP after clearing Fortune Gear and Gemstone Cave will lead to this little check-in.

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The last time we had one of these cutaways, we saw Malik and his desire to revive a strange blonde lady. Now we get more insight into Melody’s motivations.

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As we already learned way back at Unclean Mark, Melody is homicidally obsessed with beauty.

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And she doesn’t so much get along with her coworkers.

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I used to love the word “vainglorious”… But then I read a breakdown of the webcomic Sinfest. Now it is ruined for me…

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Wild Arms 3 has a lot of great, subtle animations for its various dramatic moments.
This is not one of them.

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Melody is chastised for her dedication to beauty, and she retorts by scolding Malik’s love of zombies.

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Bro does not like to have his side projects threatened.

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Tropes I will never get tired of: villains are working together for a common goal, but they hate each other because, ya know, they’re villains.

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“We will build a better planet! Where Smurfs are more accepted!”

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There may also be less altruistic reasons these three want to evolve the planet, though.

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I guess they’re obsessed with Final Fantasy 6? You know, Terra was named Tina in Japan, fools.

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“Could we wrap this meeting up, guys? We have evil laugh class in like five minutes.”

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I do appreciate that the Prophets have life or death stakes for why they are manipulating the whole of the world. Recently, we have been establishing that the “Council of Seven” used to be pretty idealistic good guys…

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They’re not so good anymore, though.

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“Like, again. You were so close last time.”

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Melody and Malik quarrel, but it is clear who is unquestionably in charge.

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Thank you, Chatty Cathy.

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Asgard learned how to completely obliterate the heroes, which is something you failed to do, Malik. Did you really think the big lug couldn’t figure out English?

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“Also, I stuck an iPhone down their throat while nobody was looking.”

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What an odd thing to say. I wonder if this is a theme of Wild Arms 3.

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Malik, we’re really short staffed here. If you could just answer phones and learn about how robots work, that would be great.

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Also: get back to your real job.

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“Gee, I don’t know. Maybe four people with ARMs and god-power keep threatening us at every turn.”

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“He says, ‘I’m a stupid green thing, and I freak everybody out.’”

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“Don’t worry, he’ll be there a while. That part where it loops with pipes and the lava before the hammer brother trips up everybody.”

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Newsflash: nobody trusts Janus. Should have given Balazs the Dark Spear.

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So that’s where we’re at with the bad guys: Melody and Asgard are going to try to wreck our team, and Janus is achieving ultimate power. Virginia, meanwhile, can’t get off Clive’s couch.

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“Yeah, Clive, my real one. Not some green-haired dude with glasses that I’ve been projecting on for the last few weeks.”

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“We had a lot of fun in the backyard with weapons.”

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“Never taught me how to brush my teeth, but I used to bullseye wind rats back home.”

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“If that photo is indeed the Council of Seven...Or if it is somehow connected to the prophets, it may have something to do with the mysteries of the world.”
What are the odds of a JRPG party ever finding anything that doesn’t have to do with the mysteries of the world?

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Kinda Spoilers: I am really impressed that Wild Arms 3 showed enough restraint to not make Clive’s Professor/Father-in-Law part of the Council of Seven. There was at least one independent scientist on this planet! (Even if he did live down the street from the sole laboratory on Filgaia.)

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“And it’s how you met your wife? How do I become a scientist, Clive?”

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“Everyone else just said ‘this planet sucks’ and didn’t research any further.”

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It’s always awkward when someone admits to killing a family member.

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“Left off the father-in-law bit, though! That’s on you.”

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“Anyone else in this gang have mentor-based trauma? Everybody? That’s what I thought.”

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We now go live to Virginia for her reaction…

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That’s the stuff.

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You two going to have a slap fight right here in Clive’s living room?

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Take a moment to appreciate that ceiling.

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Oh thank God, it’s Datson. We all love you Datson.

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We always have time for you, Datson!

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Remember back when vaguely anonymous NPCs had the same modeling work as the main characters? Good times.

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“Please, give us anything as a distraction.”

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“Approximately six feet in that direction. He could shout from there. I really have no idea why I’m the messenger.”

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Remember that dude fixing the Memory Figurine a couple updates back? The one in the cult? Guess who is the client.

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Gallows and his religion get a few believability bonus points because we routinely summon his gods.

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“Anybody else want to cry about lost father figures? No? Let’s go.”

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Stop camping our save point, plot.

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A little overeager there, Al.

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“Your freaky cult better not be a sex cult. I left my owl mask at home.”

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“We at the Ark of Destiny are dedicated to using ancient artifacts to bring about a better future, free from these harsh environmental conditions. Our religious order has recently discovered a ruin in this area. It is said to be an ancient ruin, dating back to the very first people who inhabited this planet.”
Oh here we go again with this…

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Remember my warning earlier, Wild Arms 3.

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Never go full Trigun.

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But, nope! We’re going to commit to this whole “wasteland planet filled with people that flew here on a spaceship” conceit.

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Of course it is going to be canon now. You can’t have a religious order in a JRPG without it being at least partially right. (And if it is partially wrong, it is only because an evil god is in charge. And that’s only half right this time.)

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“So, you need us to… launch humanity in space? I’m not following here.”

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So the local ruin has a “security system”, and there is a magical-scientific artifact in there. Got it.

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Shard of Lavos? Been there.

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Just keep digging that hole, Al.

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“Are you going to use it to power a giant, transforming robot?”
“Yes, obviously.”

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Hey! It’s the first time our “Drifters” have officially accepted a mission since Granny told us to save the world.

No, gardening does not count.

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“I want me some new firepower, Clive.”

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Virginia doesn’t get enough credit as a JRPG protagonist for preemptively figuring out the villains’ plans. Most heroes just stumble into bad guy traps.

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Virginia also gets additional kudos for remembering to get paid.

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Score. You got Venmo, Albert?

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That literally was a negotiation!

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“Might be a legendary artifact that can power space travel, might be nothing. We’ll find out!”

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Oh yeah, we need directions.

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Let’s go!

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Our next destination is a short gallop from Humphrey’s Peak.

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I wonder if this is more of a pun in the original Japanese. “Faraway Lands” is just kind of a non sequitur of a dungeon name in these parts.

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Ack! This dick! You better run!

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“Hey, Clive, didn’t you dedicate your life to figuring out what was wrong with the planet? And there was this huge thing, like, a jog from your house? Does that bother you?”

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Thar be monsters.

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Meanwhile, Virginia’s Daddy Sense is tingling.

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Ain’t nothing “land” about this place.

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So we’ve got a significantly mechanical dungeon, and its inhabitants…

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Are a bunch of weirdos. You main opponents are these Power Ranger-looking Digimon rejects.

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Aw, electricity, the ol’ standby for murdering robots.

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This doesn’t seem to do anything, but it feels threatening.

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But thanks for dropping the Dragon Fossil. We can always use more of those!

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More options than usual for making progress.

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Guess the elevator is out.

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And we’ll need a little more height to get those treasure chests.

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Here is your other common opponent for this area: Unknown.

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Unknowns are translucent, which is shorthand for how they are completely immune to physical attacks.

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And they are generally resistant to all elemental magic, too.

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This could mean your average battle takes forever. Back on the “normal stats” PS5 version of Wild Arms 3, Wirginia is one of our most powerful mages, but her light magic barely puts a dent in these jerks.

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However, there is Devastate, a spell that comes compliments of the Fire Medium. Devastate is distinctly non-elemental.

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Clive is our worst mage, but one casting of Devastate devastates an Unknown into oblivion. Now we know the spell that is going to get a workout for this dungeon.

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Oh! Some of the Vacuumons drop Warp Stars. These are consumable items that let you immediately warp to any train station. And your vehicles are dragged along, too. These are generally useful for the obvious fast travel shenanigans, but additionally valuable for warping your “boat” to helpful shores.

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Anywho, back to dungeon exploring.

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Appropriate to a place apparently once powered by a magical fire, we have to light the furnace to make progress.

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Eat it, fossil fuels.

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Scooting around the furnace room allows us to access those treasures from a few shots back.

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Just need to put in some cardio.

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And you’ll be feeling lucky in no time.

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The elevator is activated now, but there is one unexplored door up top.

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Duplicator door! Break out your magic key for more treasure.

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You are going right back to the garden the first time I get a chance.

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Now we can take the elevator. And that’s where we are going to stop this update, too. There is more dungeon to go, and I can safely say its finale is a bit of a doozy…

Next time on Wild Arms 3: Heeeeeere’s Daddy.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
296100d.png


Oh! Some of the Vacuumons drop Warp Stars. These are consumable items that let you immediately warp to any train station. And your vehicles are dragged along, too. These are generally useful for the obvious fast travel shenanigans, but additionally valuable for warping your “boat” to helpful shores.

Geez, when did Kirby visit Filgaia? Was it during Milky Way Wishes? Or Crystal Shards? Is Kirby secretly one of the ancient demons from WA1?
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
What the heck. Here is a bonus update to conclude our little tale of tomb raiding.

And we're telling this tale on September 29, Ring Day. A millionaire lady was kidnapped on this day. She managed to escape by giving a ring she hid in her fat belly to one of the kidnappers. So, wear a ring today to get some of her good luck.

Chapter 26: Everybody Lives

Previously on Wild Arms 3:

Come on grab your friends, we'll go to very Faraway Lands.
With Asgard the Golem and Virginia the Human
The fun will never end, it's Kizim Flame Time

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Now let’s use that working elevator.

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But the switch on the bottom floor isn’t working so well. Anybody have a clue on how to activate that bad boy?

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How about we use a nearby platform to get a little height?

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And then,
after we drop on the switch, flip up on that grate to reach an open door?

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And maybe we could get in a fight where the treasure is worth noting.

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A Baselard can be a random drop in this area. This is an accessory that was previously dropped by a boss (specifically Janus when he first went fish-guy), and can now be found in infinite supply by slaying local creatures. It is not that great of an accessory (free action canceling, oh boy), but just be aware that this sort of thing starts being available around here.

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And speaking of loot, our next tool is in the next room.

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But we don’t have a moment to enjoy it, as the treasure is trapped.

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This looks like a basic Vacuumon, a common monster in this dungeon.

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And in my PS2 “boosted” playthrough, it was. But! In my less powerful PS5 playthrough, Vaccy lived long enough to use the Eject ability.

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Which instantly ended the battle without any rewards…

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And teleported the whole party back to the entrance! What a hassle!

… Or it would be if there were more than one room between here and the elevator back to where we were. I never saw Eject used by another monster in this dungeon, but I would not want to get hit by that if we were further in.

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Anywho, back to that room below the elevator. Mighty Gloves is a new Clive tool, and it allows Clive to lift certain blocks, or push certain other blocks. Sorry, nothing more complicated than that basic function. Clive seems to get all the abilities that might have combat purposes, but only ever work on specific obstacles. Would have liked to use those bombs on that last monster…

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The puzzle of any given Mighty Gloves task is that you can only ever move a block two squares over, with Clive pivoting around the place of one “block”. Lifting blocks up onto a ledge is, like having glowing hands, not a big deal.

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And then there are these “push” blocks, which work like classic “ice puzzles”. Pushed blocks will slide until they hit another obstacle (wall, block), and the challenge is not shoving all the blocks into an unusable corner.

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And don’t forget to grab treasure while you are playing with your new toy.

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As you might expect, the rest of this dungeon is wall-to-wall boring corridors or Mighty Glove puzzles. It is the way of things.

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Ah, here’s a fun one.

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First, we’re going to ignore this puzzle and scoot over to an open door to the east. Here, we’ll find a gimel coin and…

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More fights!

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Oh boy, two mimics.

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Over in PS5 land, I want to note that our first mimic fight literally killed Clive, and left our party hurting for the rest of the dungeon. Now two of ‘em can’t even knock off half of Jet’s HP.

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Our reward is Robber’s Ego. This is an accessory that dramatically increases the chance of disarming booby traps on battle-reward chests. For fairly obvious reasons, this can be a major boon, and is well worth the Ability Points in your more dangerous dungeons.

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Now back to this room.

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Despite the fact that mo’ boxes could equal mo’ problems, there isn’t much to worry about here.

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Every box just needs to be moved over exactly one box length. The biggest issue here is that Clive might get a hernia that would impact his ability to life his adorable daughter.

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Done with that.

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The absolute next area in the plot requires the Sand Vessel, so keep track of those Dragon Fossils if you haven’t already slain a giant Dragon Fossil-based monster.

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Not too much dungeon to go here. Enjoy some gems for your troubles.

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Since the Mighty Gloves mean you always must move a block over two spaces, you technically have to move the left block to the right switch, and the right block to the left switch.

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Criss cross applesauce.

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When you reach the giant, glowing green thing, it is probably a good idea to save.

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“Did anyone think to bring goggles!?”

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Pretty standard fantasy trope there, Virginia.

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You would think that a culture that harnessed the infinite power of cold fire would have thought to write a few things down, but, sure, prehistoric.

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Oh, they know how to use it all right. By the way, do you care about there being any living thing left on Filgaia?

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Pragmatic/suicidal.

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The Kizim Fire appeared in Wild Arms (1). It was distinctly an Elw invention in that universe, but it is implied (here and in a later dungeon) that it is a distinctly human invention here. But it wouldn’t be the first time humans stole a technology from a native culture and claimed it as their own…

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Welp, we got that Kizim Fire without any fuss. Let’s eject ourselves back to Humphrey’s Peak as quickly as possible.

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“...A vessel said to have come from a distant land...Out of all artifacts we know of, this one seems to have made the biggest mark.”
Ah, there we go. Just doing the boss fight out of order this time.

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“Did you have to solve a bunch of block puzzles, too?”

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Melody is straight up here just to murder the party. Surprisingly enough, she does not care about that artifact of unimaginable power they are now lugging around.

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Melody’s “plans for the future” involve a reservation at Gunner’s Heaven tonight for one of their big salads, so she is in kind of a rush.

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“What does this weakened, unsightly little planet need? It needs strength, and beauty...How dare you stand there and oppose me!”
Really do not want to see Melody’s planetwide makeover montage.

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Aw, nerts.

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Wretched automaton. Last time we fought this guy, we literally died.

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Hopefully we will see a better outcome this fight.

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Oh, you know it’s a plot battle when you see those reward stats. Don’t waste a lucky card on this fortress.

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But shooting the ‘bot seems to be helping.

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A couple of rounds in, Asgard uses that move that was homicidal the last time.

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Here is a shot from the PS5 playthrough. As you can see, it bites off about 50% of our maximum HP, but is survivable.

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I said it was survivable, guys.

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“Hey! Let’s see how clean your existence is after running around a thousand-year-old dungeon!”

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Melody is big into aesthetics. We get it!

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Clive seems to be the persistent rival to Melody. I appreciate that the writers didn’t go for the obvious “tomboy Virginia versus head cheerleader Melody” dichotomy.

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You going to attack with lipstick and blush? Actually, that might be cool…

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“BEAUTY BEAM ACTIVATE.”

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No. Melody. But partial credit for talking at all.

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You two have met, like, once. You could have had the same reaction to one of Janus’s cronies.

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One question, Jet. Just one.

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Battle 2! Asgard now teams up with Melody.

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Sigh.

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Melody is just as ineffectual as before, albeit now she will attack characters other than Clive.

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Though the trick is that Asgard will 100% guard any attacks aimed at Melody.

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So targeting Melody with anything will lead to Asgard absorbing the hit.

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And Asgard really knows how to absorb a hit.

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And, while it is not reciprocal (that is a later battle), Asgard can dish it out, too.

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So target the big boy until they decide to kill you again.

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Seriously! That is an instant-death attack that will work regardless of your circumstances.

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I do not believe I had a chance to cover it yet, but if you are dead at the end of a battle, your max HP is temporarily dropped. See how everyone’s max is red? That will not be cured until a stay at an inn. This is theoretically a gameplay penalty for just leaving a party member dead on the ground in normal battles, though death is mandatory in this specific circumstance.

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Ass-guard just killed the whole party, so they need a breather.

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And Melody seems to enjoy seeing us drop dead. This should not come as a surprise.

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Just keep puking out those metaphors, Melody.

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But what’s this!? Just when they are about to deliver the killing blow, Asgard is malfunctioning!

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Scream that at the top of your lungs, Virginia, because…

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Werner! Virginia’s dad! Appearing before the whole party for the first time!

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Body language says dead, character portrait says happiest moment of her life.

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“I’d recognize that smelly old coat anywhere!”

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I remember the first time my dad said that to me.

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Okay, I thought we already covered this, but if Werner wants to see it...

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Asgard might be malfunctioning to the point of being a bug zapper, but they’re ready for round three.

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Aside from the handicap of reduced HP, we are ready, too.

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Now we’ve got a real battle on our hands.

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Asgard will not use their super move or instant death attack (thanks to the malfunctioning), but ‘bot can still throw hands.

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Just remember you can fight back, and there isn’t much to it.

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Ah, Asgard got Independence Day’d.

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You don’t recognize your old coworker, Melody? You should have gone to the annual Aru Sulato Party.

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Thanks for the fossil, fossil!

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“Gotta get going. Gunsmoke is on.”

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Come on, Virginia. You’ve been waiting for this moment your entire teenage life.

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“Young lady, you have thirty seconds to express all your hopes, dreams, and emotions or I am leaving.”

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Put the ball in his court! That’s the ticket!

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Mission failed.

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“Quiet, bleach boy. He’s your dad, too.”

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Oh! Oh! Is this the point in the narrative where Game Theory assumes everyone died in the fight with Asgard, and everything from this point on is some kind of death dream? Always the best part!

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“Back to work, guys! Ha ha! Please ignore that some millennia-old dust got in my eyes, and it looks like I’m crying. Total coincidence!”

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“Right now, I'm a Drifter...Not his daughter...That's all...”
“You can be two things, Virginia.”
“Shut your cake hole, Jet.”

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Welp, dungeon over. Guess we can get back to delivering this ancient artifact. Virginia needs to emotionally recover, so we’ll pick this back up later.

Next time on Wild Arms 3: Everybody look at me, cuz I’m sailing on a boat!
 

Mogri

Round and round I go
(he)
Staff member
Moderator
Or. Or!

"Hey, you three go finish the job while I go do the thing I've been obsessing over for the last decade or so."
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
Melody got greedy after two back-to-back unwinnable fights, didn't know when to cut her losses and instead tried for a third. Tsk tsk.

And yeah, this decision by Virginia is.... baffling. Her long-lost father is very slowly strolling away, but no, let him go and instead finish the job. It's the only way.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
I really, genuinely appreciate this narrative swerve here, as it is so easy to make a tearful reunion scene at this point, even though the reality of such a situation would likely be closer to what we see: Virginia is shocked at finding her father who she thought was dead or otherwise gone forever, and has no real concept of how to react to the fact that he is standing right there. She even admits that there are decent odds this isn't even her real father, as she knows she lives in an intermittently supernatural world. She has a million swirling emotions, and she just blurts out the first thing that comes to mind, even if that comes from the very justified well of anger at his abandonment. She wants to have a happy reunion, but this situation is so fantastical, she can't quite get there.

That said, I feel this event does not serve the character truly, as we all know damn well that Virginia Maxwell sat down at her desk when she was twelve, wrote a seventeen page essay on exactly what she wanted to say to her absent father, and then tucked that note into her kicky little ARM holster, and keeps that "letter" hidden in there right on the other side of the rose monogram. She was prepared for this! The only reason we never see this exhaustive note is because Virginia is embarrassed by how often her preteen self referenced her obvious crush for boy band Sev'ral Timez.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
And now we are back to our usual update schedule on October 4, Crown Day. During his coronation, the crown of King Martinius the Fool was knocked down by the hands of his own sister. Naturally, the king was furious at her, for letting everyone see his misshapen mohawk drooping underneath.

Chapter 27: You're an Errand Boy

Previously on Wild Arms:
Virginia found her father! Then he left! It was a whole thing.

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But we also picked up the Frozen Flame. So we’re going to go ahead and hand that over to Lynx.

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“Kizim Fire. Right. Whatever. You’re not my dad!”

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Score!

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Lest you think this is some kind of storyline contrivance, you actually receive 2,000 usable Gella, and it comes in a fat sack. Unfortunately, there is not a giant dollar (gella?) sign on the bag.

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Double score!

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“What part of ‘object of unimaginable power that can fuel an entire spaceship’ did you not understand?”

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“Our temple is located on a small island southwest of Jolly Roger. Please think of it as an allowance to cover travel expenses.”

Here’s
a tip for if you ever decide to start your own cult: please make it walkable. Nobody likes taking a ferry to crazy town.

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“We have a god of water on call, can they surf us over there?”
“Nope.”

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Virginia: only moderately obsessed.

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I mean, even without the hook of potentially getting more daddy facts, checking out the local techno-cult seems like a good idea. Getting paid to do so is just a nice bonus.

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If you do not upgrade your ARMs immediately after this conversation, I don’t want to know you.

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Outright stating “by Sandcraft” and “Jolly Roger” is your clue as to exactly how to get there.

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Easiest thing to do is either use one of those Warp Stars you conveniently collected in the last dungeon, or walk your ass over to the nearby train station to stay on track to Jolly Roger.

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Gee, Tony, who would have ever thought? Follow up question: where do they get boats?

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Quick side trip before we get back to the plot. Remember this dungeon? Where we first fought Melody?

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There is a block that we couldn’t move back during the first trip. Now we have the Mighty Gloves, and…

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Some switches are a lot more useable now. Funny how a dungeon that featured Clive has a treasure that can only be accessed by Future-Clive.

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Elder Record is worth the trip. This imparts a skill that reduces the cost of arcana (magic). This comes naturally with the Moon Medium, but having a spare means that both prime mages Virginia and Gallows can have reduced FP cost. More casting means faster battles!

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Okay, another train stop takes us back near Jolly Roger. Remember to check on your garden while you’re here!

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We already went through all the nonsense of securing a Sandcraft (see Chapter 21), so it is docked here and ready to go.

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This is right about the point in the game where I start hating the Wild Arms 3 in-game map…

So we are that white dot in the south there. Wild Arms 3 flips the usual gaming script by starting you out in the big, wide open “ocean”, but you cannot access that “inner sea” area of the middle of the map yet (the area just to the right of the green square). As you can see, there’s a whole big world out there to explore now… even if you can’t do much with it due to the way towns/dungeons are “discovered” through plot gates.

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And we’re off! There isn’t much to steering the Sandcraft. It is as simple as walking/horsing.

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Oh! Sandcraft fighting! This is not as simple as walking.

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Here is a brief tutorial on the most complicated system for the least payoff.

So back at the Jolly Roger, you can assign your party to different tasks. The four options are…

Helmsman – Moves the ship
Gunner – Actually attacks
Harpooner – Shoots a harpoon that does very little damage, but slows the opponent if it hits
Deckmate – “Boosts” one of the other jobs

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As it outright states here, the Gunner is your most important character, as they are the one actually doing damage. Everybody else is just kind of there.

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See all those icons in the bottom right? That is your turn order. Again, the important one is the gunner, which only appears once in all that nonsense as the… let’s count here… seventh icon/turn. Dammit. Unlike regular battles, character actions are 100% determined by speed (reflex) stat, and if a character is two times faster than another character, they will see two times as many moves. This is based exclusively on character stats (not sandcraft equipment), so, unlike some vehicle-based combat (looking at you, Xenogears), your level can and will have a significant impact on combat.

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You predominantly accrue FP by forgoing someone’s turn. Like magic in regular battles, you must have the proper FP threshold to perform certain actions, but said actions do not actually use/deplete the FP. In other words, you may need to “wait” up some FP so your gunner can shoot at all.

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As previously stated, the Harpooner firing the harpoon will delay the enemy’s turn. You can then retract the harpoon on a later turn, which I believe increases the accuracy for your gunner. Or it does nothing. I don’t know. It is a lot easier to measure the whole “delaying” thing. There are icons for that.

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Helmsman’s turn! Moving to an advantageous position either increases your accuracy or decreases the monster’s accuracy. It is probably one of those. The flash bomb lowers the opponent’s accuracy, but seems to have terrible accuracy itself, so you have better odds of seeing a rainbow shoot out of this kraken’s ass.

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We’re so close! That has to be good!

Not pictured: the deckmate has the practically useless job of increasing the speed of one of the other characters. Like all buffs in Wild Arms 3, this can only work once (i.e. does not stack), so this can only be used effectively a maximum of three times (for your three characters). Deckmate also has the ability to expend FP to “heal” the ship… but it is never enough HP to really make a difference. If you are healing in a sandcraft fight, you are rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic.

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That’s the stuff!

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Look at 'dem HP counts!

You have a choice in gunners. You can either choose one of your faster characters to shoot often, but do less damage; or you can choose Clive to gun, and wait for freakin’ ever, but usually eliminate the opponent in one hit. Clive is chosen as the gunner by default when you first get the Sandcraft, so I assume Wild Arms 3 wants you to select the latter.

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Sandcraft battles offer experience points and gella on par with the monsters you would find elsewhere at this point in the game. There isn’t much of a reward for fighting every Sandcraft battle you find.

In fact, that is the big issue with Sandcraft encounters: they are boring for very little payoff. You can almost see what they were going for here with submarine-esque combat with your crew and everything, but it ultimately equates to a whole lot of waiting around. Additionally, your Sandcraft has its own HP (based on your party’s level, but exclusive to the Sandcraft), so getting your Sandcraft wrecked on the way to a dungeon does not impact your progress once you hit the beach one iota. In short, the Sandcraft is “neat”, but reveals itself as pointless pretty quickly.

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At least some of the monsters found on the sandsea have fun names.

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You can always immediately “warp” back to the Jolly Roger if you are somehow stuck. A quick press of the square button will teleport you back home without the fear of a monster attack. Note that you cannot then reverse-warp back to your warp point…

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Since we understand combat a little better now, let’s see what Emilia has to offer in the way of upgrades (with some screenshots from later in the game, please ignore the dragon fossil count exploding).

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Emilia can customize your ARM or ship. This is the only place in the world where you will see the Sandcraft option.

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In general, the Sandcraft upgrade system is easy. Each of your four “positions” in the Sandcraft have roughly corresponding equipment. You start with “level 1” equipment. The Emilia shop offers Level 2, Level 3, and Max Level upgrades. Each of the Level 2 & 3 upgrades have three options available, while the Max Level upgrade has no options because it is just plain the best.

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An easy example here is that each of the cannons either emphasize accuracy, strength, or bullet capacity. You can accentuate one trait over another, purchase the Level 2 or Level 3 version, or just forego all the nonsense and buy the Ark Smasher, which has the best accuracy, strength, and bullet capacity. The only hang-up is that the Ark Smasher requires 50 Dragon Fossils, so you won’t be able to afford it for a while.

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Upgrading your harpoon is useless, and we shall discuss that no further. Upgrading your frame will increase your physical defense, magical defense, or (decrease) your craft’s weight. Or grab the best frame to max out all three.

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I have no idea what increasing the engine does. Max payload? Let’s say it makes you shoot harder.

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You may also purchase elemental ammo. This is ideal for the rare instances where you know the elemental weakness of your opponent and need to do some extra damage. I just checked, and the one required/super boss you battle in the Sandcraft is weak to light elemental, so purchase a light shell if you are having trouble with that (eventual) fight.

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The Sandcraft never heals on its own. Stay at an inn, beat a chapter, nothing. However, it also costs nothing to restore your Sandcraft’s HP at Jolly Roger, and Jolly Roger is always just a square button away, so I have no idea why this is so much of a thing. It really should auto-heal every time you dock…

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And here is your default setup for Sandcraft piloting. There is no real reason to juggle these assignments.

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Anyway, don’t worry about your Sandcraft too much. There is exactly one required Sandcraft fight in the game, and then there is one other optional, “super boss” Sandcraft battle. You can probably get through the rest of the game by cancelling literally every Sandcraft fight you ever see. Sound and fury signifying a big waste of time here.

Though I guess it is nice you can do something with all those Dragon Fossils you find…

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Oh, also the Sandcraft is extremely finicky with allowing you to disembark. You can only land on beaches, but lining up your parking space can sometimes be arbitrarily rejected.

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This was the wrong beach, but at least it has a sign that offers excellent advice.

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And a great treasure! I guess there is a reason to bump around the wilderness looking for whatever...

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Okay, after a little confusion, here is where we actually want to be.

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There are new monsters around here. This is apparently a kobold, but it is more of a sand monster. It can be primarily harmed by magic.

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Here we are. Had to use the radar to see this big, honking ship.

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Wild Arms 3 has a lot of polish.

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Candles? More candles, right?

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Legitimately, the old, dying religion of Wild Arms 3 appears to be lousy with temples.

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Yes. That dying religion.

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“Cult member” is not a career. Well, outside of Hollywood, at least.

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Gallows! You were doing so well!

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It would be hilarious if none of Gallows’s mediums worked for a few battles because his gods got mad at him.

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This cult has a Mr. Saturn. That’s cool.

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Please make a modern remake of Wild Arms 3 exclusively so we can hear what this font is supposed to sound like.

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“Is the celestial chamber just, like, his room?”
“Yes.”

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Is this supposed to be a clue to how sleeping at an inn impacts your luck stat, or is it just flavor text? The world may never know.

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Interior decorating is not a big thing here. Maybe you could toss a couch over there…

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Here you are. One flame of inconceivable power.

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You can tell he is the boss because he has the best chair.

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Meet Lamium. Remember him, as Lamium is going to remember our party for the rest of his life.

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He’s loaded.

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“Yes. It is going to be an infinite source of microwave popcorn for the whole order.”

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Here comes the pitch. Everybody insert your cult ear plugs.

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Crap. We’re not going to have to go to the Farplane next, right?

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“We’re big into the “now”. Now give me all your possessions.”

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“That makes sense. My mom did die of starvation…”

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So they’re using ancient technology to help evolve the planet. I swear I have heard something like that before…

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Stop being seduced by so many religions, Gallows!

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“We hare the same ideology as Baskar. One thing that sets us apart is that we are more like volunteers, rather than a monastic order.”

The hell you have the same ideology! Show me your Guardian collection!

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“I played Xenogears, and I thought ‘me too.’”

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“And there is a milkshake machine in the back. Only one in Filgaia!”

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We’re getting to that!

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Liar.

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Lamium hasn’t even started the negging in earnest, but Virginia is already about two steps away from joining the cult, too.

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Yes. Now we’re getting to the good stuff.

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See? Absolute looney tunes here.

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Gee, doesn’t it? What a coincidence.

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A girl you say? In dreams?


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“Sometimes, in my dreams, a -girl- appears and blesses me with advice. Yes, for example...this Ark of Destiny we use as our shrine was granted by her. I call this girl that guides me in my dreams, -The Saint-
“A girl gives you advice?”
“Yes. I do not know who this girl is, though... However, her words are always accurate and true. For example...”

A girl who is leading you to unimaginable treasures in exchange for seemingly nothing? This also sounds familiar…

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Interrupting cow says moo.

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“Sir! Were you telling them about your dream girl again?”

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Stuff! Happening!

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You knew this was coming! Time to protect our new allies from…

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Gaze in amazement as Virginia is gradually more and more embarrassed by her girlfriend.

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And we cannot let -The Saint- down.

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“Maya was saying she had a big score coming when we were getting boba tea yesterday…”

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“Sir, that question is more loaded than Jet’s ARM.”

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The actions or opinions of the Schröedinger Family do not in any way represent the opinions of us, Team Good Boys and Girls.

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“You want me to kill my girlfriend!?”
“What?”

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It’s rough when you are embarrassed by your significant other in public.

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Clive wants to get paid, son.

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Heck yeah.

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“Do you know how much I used to spend on hair ribbons?”

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Oh, I guarantee it will be a blast.

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“Maybe Maya will surrender willingly?”
“No, she and I got in a gunfight last Friday when I asked to try on her boots.”

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Hey, it’s that place where we already were! There was money there!

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“I am super excited to sit here in this chair and do nothing. We are the same.”

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Before we leave the ark, let’s do what you should do at any church…

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And check out the basement.

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This is a fun little area.

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Basically, everything down here requires tools, and (not unlike that block backtracking earlier) you are encouraged to return and earn treasure as you get new abilities.

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Also: use some duplicators. You can wait to use ‘em right now, though. Save those keys for dungeons that would be more difficult return trips.

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There are four doors on this wall, two more before the orange blocks, and I believe two (or three?) after the orange blocks. Can’t get past those blocks to confirm right now.

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One room requires the Mighty Gloves, and we’ve already got those.

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Excellent item to find! We will showcase this the minute we’re outside.

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Using duplicators on the other doors around here just to give you obvious previews for future tools. What’s this tile do?

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We will be “using” duplicators and resetting for informational purposes.

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There is a Memory Figure that is off-colored and…. Dances? Huh. Would you believe me if I said this was a super/optional boss?

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Oh, one room has no challenges and a collection of Warp Stars. This can be useful.

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Another stumper.

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Nope. No idea what to do here.

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Okay, let’s get out of this basement.

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And out of the ark.

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So Map Scope! Now we can have a map overlay on the screen at all times. Convenient!

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We can even bring up a larger globe overlay if we really need to see where we are going. It cannot be a coincidence that this is found so soon after getting a boat.

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While we’re hammering select, here’s the current map in PS5 land.

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Okay! Set sail for that place we already saw.

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Maybe fight a beast or two!

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Have I complimented the monster design in this game recently? I should do that more often.

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This is a nothing of a random mook, but I like its moxy.

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So here is our next destination, a little south of that sign/treasure seen earlier in the update.

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Survey Point #17 here we come!

Next time on Wild Arms 3: Every time we are together, there are fireworks.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
Man that's a lot of time wasted talking about some dream girl that is not nor ever will be important in this game ever.

But Maya! Everyone loves Maya! I wonder what startlingly unexpected power she'll display this time? I bet she can juggle!
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Hey! Listen up! It is October 11, Cool Day. If you can declare yourself cool with a straight face at the movie theater, you'll get a discount today. Try it. It's harder than you think.

Chapter 28: Gals being Pals

Previously on Wild Arms:
We didn’t join a cult, we just think they have some neat ideas. And they need a little help dealing with some mysterious Drifters (who are obviously Maya and friends), so we are going to earn some more cult cash to save the day.

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So now we enter Survey Point #17.

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Have we ever actually been to a “hectic” dungeon? Those things are usually as dead as tombs…

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Well, shucks, without fear of innocents being hurt, all sorts of crazy nonsense can happen.

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Maya wasn’t even mentioned up to this point, but Virginia only ever has two people on her mind.

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I guess the Wild Arms 3 official font has a # in there.

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There are a few treasures in crates and barrels here at the entrance. There are plenty of lil’ things to be found at Survey Point #17, but, for some reason, none are found in treasure chests. I wonder why that is

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Let us
begin the dungeon properly.

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Be sure to use Jet’s radar to determine which boxes contain valuable heal berries.

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Any local NPCs may have cleared out, but the monsters are still stalking the halls.

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So let’s give ‘em all a hand for sticking around!

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These Captor dorks can be annoying.

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The “thumbing” move distinctly does not involve thumbs. This bothers me. Captors can use a move to reduce accuracy (by poking your eyes out), or a different move that cancels your turn. Either one is unlikely to be deadly, but does make the battle drag on a little longer.

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The Urchin Bug creatures are only ever a threat because they come in groups of a craptrillion. Fun fact: you can only multi-target opponents if they are grouped together, and whether or not a monster exists in a group is apparently determined by a capricious octopus named Danny who can never keep his story straight.

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Growth Eggs may be a random drop in this dungeon. This means that, with some grinding, you could max out your points for repeated summons. Summons aren’t useful enough to justify such a thing, of course, but it is an (unreasonable) option.

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Lotta boring hallways so far at this Survey Point.

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Now here’s something that is never boring.

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“Maya, why do we always fight when our families are around?”

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"We are distinctly here for you, yes, but only because we are being paid to be!"

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There is not a heterosexual explanation for these two.

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I have to admit that this is a very good point that you rarely see in JRPGs. Hey, comic relief rival characters, you know we’re actively saving everyone, right? Why don’t you stop wasting time and go ahead and help save the world?

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“Can’t we all just get along? And maybe kiss a little bit?”

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I choose to believe her current character portrait is literal, and Maya got bored halfway through that speech, and started appraising gems.

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“Fight for the good of the world, huh? Why don't you leave that to a superhero? Sorry, but I'm not interested. I'm only interested in gems. One of these days, I'll find a gem so big, I won't be able to carry it. Ah-ah! Not a word!”
The girl’s got goals.

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If there were such a thing as The Absent Father Gem on Filgaia, then Maya and Virginia could truly team up.

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A formal invitation.

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This is just the weirdest courtship maneuver, but I kind of get it.

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Thanks for stopping by!

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It was worth a pointless, pointless try.

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Guess we better catch up to ‘em. Hey, were they walking back to the entrance just because they heard us coming?

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Keep using the radar for hidden treasure! Or hit the circle button next to every object you see!

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Did you think today’s update would be devoid of “important” plot?

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Malik is here, and he’s ruminating on his failures regarding his jar-woman.

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Have these two met? I want to say no…

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Yeah, looks like a no.

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“The real heroes are here! We’re in the back!”

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You’re one to talk…

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“Pssst, Maya, this is one of those guys trying to destroy the world that I was telling you about.”
“They want mah gems!”

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What? You expected her to think you were here for the lucky card barrels?

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I appreciate how Maya routinely casually reveals that she genuinely knows what is going on (but doesn’t care).

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All out attack!

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If you can create ladies in tubes…

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You can make your own monsters, too.

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This would be a clue for what to do in the impending battle if said impending battle wasn’t wholly pointless.

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But let’s get on with it.

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This “boss” is a collection of four color-swaps of monsters you’ve likely seen before (technically all are from random encounters you potentially could have avoided/missed).

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These things must have more threatening names in the original Japanese… Right? Here is Hound the Lizard.

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Feline the two-tailed cat.

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Donkey the Spikey Boy.

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And Flier the Giant Chicken. He’s a giant chicken, I tell you!

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They each have different elemental resistances and weaknesses.

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And, as you may expect, they each have their own vaguely unique attacks.

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“He’s right behind me, isn’t he?”

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The clue of Donkey directing the creatures seems to be nonsense, as these things can and will attack random party members regardless of Donkey’s actions.

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Feline will pump up its allies’ speed/evade stats, so you may as well target the cat first.

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Kill it before it toys with you.

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Despite the even odds here, there is very little to worry about.

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Flier likes to negate your own buffs, so take out that cockatrice wannabe if you are the one player on Earth that utilizes buffs effectively in Wild Arms 3.

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Time to die, artificial monsters.

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This battle truly is no more difficult than a random encounter. Your reward is the Bullet Clip, an FP skill that may automatically refill your ammo when you hit zero. This sounds like something that would be inordinately useful on a character with a low bullet count (hi, Clive!), but it is not reliable enough to really make a difference. That one turn defending to reload is worth it compared to the Skill Point investment Bullet Clip requires.

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I would disparage this pointless boss fight if not for the fact that it allows Virginia to righteously note that Maya could have helped.

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Is Maya supposed to be Scottish? Or did she just watch one episode of Ducktales, and decided Scrooge McDuck was her hero?

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A wink that says “I knew you could handle it. Also, I bought that new corset you said you liked.”

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But they spanked his Donkey!

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Particularly given pre-fish-guy-Janus kicked your collective asses…

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Decisions, decisions…

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Maya hates fighting when her girlfriend isn’t the opponent.

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Woo! Team-up!

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Virginia hasn’t had this big of a win in ages.

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Here it comes.

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Maya must assert some level of power here. Wouldn’t want to look like you are capitulating for your SO in front of the talking cat.

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Baka.

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“I was getting tired of you ‘playfully’ shooting me.”

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Maya may have learned how to play nice, but “shake” is still outside of her skillset.

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So we’re all one big, happy family now. Not that they will be helping in battle at all…

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This means we get to keep all the random treasures.

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Here we go! Parallel buddy puzzles! And the double entendres just keep coming!

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We’ve seen this in a Wild Arms game before: you open a path, the ally opens the next gadget, everybody has a fun time.

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This is our opening puzzle, so the only real way to “lose” is to fall in a nearby hole.

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So one puzzle down.

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Have I showcased one of these before? Here’s what happens when the guardians hate you for joining some other dude’s cult.

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Every once in a great while, you may have to fight with just one character for approximately three turns.

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But I swear your evasion jacks up when alone. This is “low level” Wirginia on the PS5, and she is handling herself well for being pretty damn squishy.

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Even if she isn’t reciprocating all that well.

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She was doing alright!

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She doesn’t even get bonus experience for fighting alone for three rounds? Boo.

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I just like to imagine Virginia fighting four monsters on her own while her seven teammates are like, “Hey, where’d she go?”

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“Actually, I'm a little reluctant. After all, all my victories and glory have been won by myself alone...”
Never stop playing hard to get.

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These two are going to have the most messed up kids.

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Going to be!?

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Slightly more complicated cooperative switching here. If you fall off, you have to start over (and, more importantly, Maya insults you).

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Still, nothing too difficult here. Note for posterity that these puzzles are 100% based on Virginia’s toolset. Funny how that works out.

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Other characters are allowed to participate in other hallways.

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Should we be saving? Yes.

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Maya knows exactly how to get under Virginia’s skin.

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“You know what? You're an incurable fool. A bond based on nothing will and can be broken without reason, at a blink of an eye. But our bond now is bound by a common goal--although it's just temporary, it's still reliable. Is there any other point in arguing!?”

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I mean… true enough?

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The third and final big boy puzzle. This one sees our heroines chased by an encroaching spike block.

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You must toss some fireballs at the spike block, or it will catch up and reset the room (presumably crushing someone in the process).

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Be sure to cover Maya’s rear, too!

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In a cute turn against tradition, Maya will fail to activate her last switch.

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But she does come around on not leaving Virginia to be crushed to death.

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Return the favor, and make sure Maya is safe.

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See? Teamwork makes the dream work.

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And here’s why you should have saved at that gimel coin.

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Same old argument over wiping out all of humanity for the sake of three people…

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I believe this is our first confirmation from the bad guys that they were members of the Council of Seven. The good guys were just assuming up to this point.

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Big, scary plans for the planet!

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Maya hear ya. Maya don’t care.

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Nobody ever thinks to just walk past the big bads…

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She’s not wrong!

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The polite choice is always to leave a conversation you find uninteresting.

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Welp.

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Considering how ineffectual these prophets have been…

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“And when I say ‘I’, I mean ‘some random monster I’m going to summon’.”

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Two is less than four! That is better than the last battle!

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Do you think maybe cooperation and teamwork are the themes of this dungeon?

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Humpty and Dumpty were random encounters in the final dungeon of Wild Arms (1). They didn’t look exactly like these egg-shaped dudes (in Wild Arms, they kind of looked more like rabites), but they had a similar light/dark twin pairing. Wild Arms 2 also had Zyclus and Zetrim, which were twin super bosses that looked more like angry penguins. So it is hard to say if these two are another Wild Arms franchise monster (like other Prophet summons), or something wholly original. Humpy and Dumpty are at least evocative…

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Humpy is the smaller twin, and strong to light, but weak to dark.

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Humpty is your support monster. It will buff Dumpty to hell and back.

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Dumpty, meanwhile, is the combat mage that is strong to dark, but weak to light.

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It will continually perform elemental attacks that hit the whole party. Dark is coincidentally what it used here, but all elements are on the table.

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Over in PS5 land, you can see that these attacks can eat off like a third of your max HP.

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As per JRPG tradition, take out the lil’ support dude first.

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Here is an important moment from the PS5 fight. Clive is dead because his magic resistance is terrible. So Jet starts the next round by accelerating to use a revive fruit. Then Virginia Mystics our best curative item, a potion berry. Now Dumpty can wreck the party with yet another magical attack, and Clive (and everyone else) will survive. If it was simply Virginia using a revive fruit before Dumpty’s action, Clive would be dead again.

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Whether it be with arcana, gems, or a summons, exploit Dumpty’s weakness to light to do maximum damage with your mages. With constant attack-all onslaughts, the longer Dumpty survives, the more likely you are to lose this battle (or at least lose all your healing items).

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Always happy to earn a duplicator.

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Malik doesn’t even say goodbye, and we still have a little dungeon (and yet another boss) left to go. Let’s save this area’s explosive finale for the next update.

Next time on Wild Arms 3: Those cats were fast as lightning.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
Y'know I never really picked up on the very obvious flirting between Maya and Virginia back in the day. Looking at it now, man, how dense was I?
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
I make a lot of jokes, but it is supremely worth noting that the plot of Wild Arms 3 doesn't even attempt to toss a boy in Virginia's path. Clive is happily married and a surrogate father, Gallows doesn't seem to even be considered, and Jet is the closest thing there with a possible "the lady doth protest too much"... but it seems more like they are positioned as bickering siblings than potential lovers (complete with the fact that they both have the same dad). Meanwhile, Maya is firmly positioned as the one character Virginia pays the most attention to (except her father, of course), and later developments put her... Well, we'll cover it when we get there. In the meanwhile, when these two are in the same scene, two whole parties of men shut up and just let things happen.

Anyway, just going to go ahead and say that this all seems like a very deliberate move on the part of the writers.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
If you came here for Wild Arms 3, you are in the right place! And the right date is October 18, Arrowhead Day. Watching arrowhead grass blown by the wind makes me feel refreshed. The shape of the arrowhead grass became the basis of arrows as we know today. See? The arrows are pointing this way today.

Chapter 29: Volatile Dreams

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Maya and Virginia worked together to conquer a survey point that had a surprisingly high number of cooperative puzzles. Why either team of four couldn’t just solve these puzzles built for two “alone” is anybody’s guess.

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And we beat back noted prophet Malik twice, so now it is a clear shot to the precious gems that we came here for.

… Well, technically we were just hired to chase Maya out… But… ya know…

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Oh, here’s Maya now. Yes, sorry, it took a week.

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Look lovely tonight?

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Let’s rock(s).

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“And we just fought two boss battles that totaled six different monsters! Can we take a break?”

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Again
with the whacky courtship maneuvers.

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I would be genuinely curious to see what the rest of the men standing around think about all this. Like, even if she is a little weird, is Clive just happy Virginia has found someone?

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Virginia knows she is going to beat them, right? And doesn’t want to hurt Maya or her friends? Do you figure Maya knows she is going to lose, too? But just wants to give her girlfriend a win?

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Literacy starts the battle!

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New Maya morph! Now we can produce three Maya amiibos!

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They did not need to go this far for this model that appears, like, twice.

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So another Schrödinger family fight.

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This is our third battle with this foursome, and, once again, all the support family members behave exactly the same (give or take being more powerful to match current levels). Your first move is always to light Todd up like a candle.

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Maya is the only one with new attacks, and she is a completely different animal from her previous appearances. Fighting Artist Maya is the opposite of her witch form: entirely physical-based, and will hit one character for significant damage. Not a “1 hit kill” situation, but still something to watch out for.

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Everybody else is just as boring as ever.

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As before, Todd will heal Maya and her brother as long as he is active, so take his flaming afro out first.

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Maya’s moves are mostly borrowed from the moveset of Kanon of Wild Arms 2. Kanon was more cyborg than martial artist, but it is nice to see her abilities getting referenced by a (generally) friendly character.

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Anywho, aside from maybe tossing up some anti-physical buffs, there is not much to this fight. More or less your concern should be still having the stamina after two other boss fights.

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Also, I believe this is another fight where you only must defeat Maya to win (though Todd is a technical requirement, as you are unlikely to be able to outpace his counter-healing).

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The ladies are spent.

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It’s good cardio, evidently.

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Just need a minute here…

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You know, there just might be a metaphor here for Maya pressuring Virginia to “sparkle” and… Oh, I’m probably seeing too much into it.

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Don’t ever lie to yourself about “what you love most”.

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“Never could have whipped out my pole back in those days.”

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“There was this golem, and… Oh. Right. You were there.”

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This time? When have we ever lost to you?

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Success!

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Respect! Success!

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Ha ha, “when the time comes”. The time for what?

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I feel like it is the blinking on both sides that really sells this calamity.

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Virginia tosses the explosive rocks, and it is time to go.

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So! This dungeon isn’t done yet! We’ve got 15 minutes to dash backwards through Survey Point #18. Welcome to Wild Arms 3’s first countdown challenge!

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15 minutes is a while, and, honestly, there isn’t much to worry about here. All the puzzles are already solved, and, while there are pits, we are well past the point in Wild Arms 3 where you should have trouble walking.

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Battles do continue, though.

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If you’re curious, the timer does not tick down while you spend time on menus. You only have to worry about when you are actively moving. This fact will be super important during the final Wild Arms 3 countdown challenge…

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Battles are similar. The timer will wait while you make selections on what to actually do during a fight, and it will only resume once your characters start carrying out commands. None of these fights are hard, but you may have noticed in the last update that a lot of these battles can be slow. The hand monsters reduce accuracy, and the pill bugs appear in large groups. Either situation may make the battle go longer than usual, so you may want to be generous with canceling encounters altogether.

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Regardless, you are unlikely to have any difficulty with this generous timer. We are at the exit, and that screenshot indicates we took a whole two minutes to get here.

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And no matter what was on the clock, it is implied you just made it.

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“Okay, so, funny story…”

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“So, wait, you two aren’t dating?”
“Well, it is heavily implied.”

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“In all fairness, you probably should have told us about the whole comburent rocks thing.”

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Hooray! We don’t have to fill out any insurance claims!

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“You’re such a nice guy! We are going to feel so bad when we’re responsible for your death.”
“What?”

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“Never mind!”

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So, yes, Survey Point #18 was completely obliterated. That is why there were no treasure chests in the dungeon: you can never return, so it would be kind of mean to tie a game-long sidequest to an area with limited availability.

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“Aw, you really are a nice guy! We are going to feel so bad when we’re responsible for your death.”
“Why do you keep saying that?”

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“You are all faithful, trustworthy , and foremost, full of energy...An ideal team of Drifters!”
“W-We are...?”
You are the most important people on this planet! Appointed by literal gods! Take the compliment!

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Oh, great. Now we get back to story time.

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“Everybody made fun of my gorgeous hair ribbons.”

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And ten years ago, you say? Why does that feel relevant…

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“I had lost all sense of time or day, and in an unconscious stupor, I found myself in front of a large tree. But looking back now, that was probably not a big tree...This was where I came into contact with various artifacts, sources of past wisdom, and many documentary records. These are what helped me found this Order.”
A big tree, eh? Boy, have I been there

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Ah yes. The little dream girl. Perfectly normal thing to have happen. Happens to Gallows’s brother all the time.

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“You got directions back to the only tree in Filgaia?”

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“Founded a techno-future cult yada yada yada now I have a yellow ribbon, too.”

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“Oh, did I not note that I tamed and rode a dinosaur? I always forget to mention that part.”

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“After being blessed with the artifacts and the knowledge, I was found semiconscious in a village called Boot Hill.”
“(Boot Hill!? That's my hometown!)”
What a coincidence!

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“I keep thinking it’s a pun on ‘booting up the game,’ but that would be silly.”

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“Apparently, I was found lying unconscious by the foot of the entrance. Thanks to the friendly villagers who nursed me back to health, I soon left the village in search of the ruins. Yes...It was the excavation of this very Ark of Destiny. After that, I gave up on being a Drifter, and guided by the Saint, I started this Order. The rest is history...”
I love how in his first meeting, Lamium is all about reason and science and whatever. And now his secret origin is that he found a magical tree in the desert, passed out at a random town, is guided by a dream girl, and is continually finding ancient tech thanks to mystical visions. All seems pretty logical!

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And that’s coming from the kid with amnesia!

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Unfortunately, Lamium lost his map back to the tree. Maybe it is within walking distance of Boot Hill? Maybe not?

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But apparently it was a nice place.

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Good question!

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“But one thing for certain is that this incident was reality. As you can see, I have excavated the Immigrant Ship, and I am leading this Order as we speak...”
Just because your current reality isn’t a dream doesn’t mean you cannot have had a dream in the past. Or… something.

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“No big. Figured we had to hear your backstory at some point.”

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Hooray! More plot dumping!

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Unfortunately, we do not get another job at this time. Seems that blowing up our last mission is something of a black mark on the ol’ résumé.

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So we haven’t distinctly said it yet, but the NPCs are making it obvious our next destination is Boot Hill.

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Did… did you dream about us? You legally have to tell us if you did.

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So now we can access the library. Previously, this was the only blocked area in the place.

… Well, room not blocked by a tool of some kind.

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Aw, there’s even a little reading table there.

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“The religious order, the Ark of Destiny, headed by its founder Lamium, has only been in existence for about ten years. Its new ideals, activities, and ways of life are geared towards the goal of pursuing a future. The doctrine does not look to intangible, spirituals entities. It is applying yourself as a life-form of this planet, and what we must do to live strongly. Each one of us plays a leading role in this doctrine through our actions. We hope you will join us today, to help us find a tomorrow.”
… They let us in the library just so we could read their damn pamphlets…

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“The Order of the Ark of Destiny challenges us to find the path of living. We must consider what we live for here on this unforgiving world of Filgaia. We must become strong, and to help foster strength, we pursue various methods of bolstering our own fortitude. One of these projects is the excavation of ruins. We feel that proper use of relics of the past will help lead us to a better future. We attribute this to the roots of our founder Lamium, who was a Drifter before he formed the Order. In his travels through the wasteland, he discovered that in order to support great ideals, other powers are necessary. We must take the powers responsible for the ravaging of our world and blaze a new trail with them. We, the Order of the Ark of Destiny, scour the vast wasteland for ways to bring about a bright future for all.”
You know, I would enjoy a story about a JRPG world filled with adventurers, and some enterprising charlatan that starts a cult exploiting the fact that every idiot that traipses through a dungeon thinks they’re the chosen one…

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“The friction of the sand combined with menacing monsters has sent countless ships and the people on them to a sandy grave. Indeed, the crossing of the dunes is something that comes with a great deal of risk. This leads us to the reason why we, the Order of the Ark of Destiny, constructed our temple complex here on Yard Isle. This region used to be ignominiously known as the Ships' Graveyard due to the high number of wrecked hulls that washed ashore. But one day, the island's history charted a new course when a Drifter discovered a new ship in the wreckage. You see, the ship he found was one of the kind that our distant ancestors referred to as a soaring ship. With this crystal of ancient wisdom at his fingertips, he set off on a mission to save the planet. That Drifter was our founder, Lamium, ten years ago. And the soaring ship was converted into the Order's temple, becoming the center of all its activities. A new ship is about to launch from the island once known as a graveyard. The future of Filgaia is tied to the place where the Order of the Ark of Destiny was founded.”
The Ships’ Graveyard is a recurring location in Wild Arms titles that is… exactly what it is named. It is nice to see that, while it is not a “real” dungeon/location in Wild Arms 3, it is still a thing.

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Now we’ve hit the jackpot.

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Yggdrasil? Wasn’t that a mythical big tree? I feel like I heard about something like that recently.

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Drum roll, please.

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“The last seven council members...Yes, here it is. This was ten years ago...Leehalt Alcaste, Werner Maxwell, Pete Inkapilia, Elliot Enduro, Malik Bendict, Melody Vilente. And... Duran Bryant.”
This list was mentioned earlier in the Let’s Play, and, yes, it is the only time we get any further mention of Pete Inkapilia.

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So this all but confirms the validity of Virginia’s daddy photo, and…

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Yes, we have been fighting a healthy 42% of the former council.

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I like that Clive distinctly notes “or recreate”. He will 100% not be surprised if they are robots or something.

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“And not just because I ran out of clean laundry.”

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“(Elliot Enduro, a member of the Council of Seven...He has the same last name as mine...Is that just a coincidence?)”
Oh, probably. Probably also a coincidence that you now know you were raised by another member of the Council of Seven. Just big ol’ fluke all the way down.

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“Does Jetty Wetty have a rumbly in his tummy?”

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Nobody else notes that Jet has the same last name as Elliot… though there are good odds Jet has never mentioned he even has a last name…

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“All these weird shapes in those papery things.”
“Are you afraid of books, Jet?”

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“The seven members of the Council of Seven have been selected for this term. They are as follows: Environmental Alteration Team: Werner Maxwell, Leehalt Alcaste, and Melody Vilente. These members will be responsible for researching ways to use the leyline energy effectively. Life Creation Team: Pete Inkipilia, Elliot Enduro, and Malik Bendict. These members will be responsible for researching the leyline structure in order to revive the planet's life force. Maintenance Controller: Duran Bryant. He will be responsible for maintaining the facility and its machinery. We hope that these seven geniuses of the Council of Seven will restore Filgaia back to its verdure.”
You can “reread” the Council of Seven book, and find that Clive left out all the good parts. Looks like Werner, Leehalt, and Melody were all distinctly on the same team (which makes Melody not noting Werner back at the golem battle kind of suspect). Pete, Elliot, and Malik were all working on “life creation”, which Malik seems to be continuing with his tube girl (and I am sure there is no connection between the boy with no memories who gets sick looking at lab equipment and the scientist with the same last name working on “life creation”). And Duran is distinctly the mechanic of the group. Worth remembering that we found Duran’s journal, and he was apparently talking to a dream girl, too.

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“Seven experts, specializing in science, magic, and various other fields...At times, they were referred to as 'The Rainbow.' They were the Council of Seven, which researched ways to rejuvenate Filgaia over many decades. This research first began when the first group of seven came into contact with the information library Hyades, left behind by the demons. The members of the council were interchanged depending on the direction of the research, or with changes of the time. Many different phenomena were solved due to their work. The countless hours and efforts put in by these specialists to analyze Hyades is finally about to pay off. The environmental rejuvenation, planetary energy production and supply--all of this was a vision every council member shared. The seven colors of 'The Rainbow' will soon change into a single ray of hope.”
I’m sorry? We could ditch the “Prophets” moniker, and call these goons “The Rainbow”? Leehalt needs a lesson in branding.

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This is a duplicator-sealed book. I understand that kind of thing happening in a lawless town or dungeon, but why wouldn’t someone have already unlocked this book here in a freaking library?

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“Nidhogg is a greedy evil serpent. It heads to the grove with its jaws wide open, looking for prey. Nidhogg is a greedy evil serpent. Darker than the night, its jaws belong to two heads, acting as one. Nidhogg is a greedy evil serpent. Two giants wield their swords to exterminate the evil serpent. One of the giants heads to the forest with good intentions. One of the giants heads to the forest with evil intentions. However, neither of the two giants knew there were now two Nidhoggs. By knowing there are two Nidhoggs, one can infiltrate the core. Nidhoggs are greedy evil serpents. They head to the grove with their jaws wide open, looking for prey. These two giants were never to be seen again.”
This is a clue to a mandatory quest that will appear a little further along in the plot. It is also a wholly useless clue, so, once again, sealing this information behind a duplicator is awful.

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“Most of the excavation sites operated by the Ark of Destiny are ordered by the founder, Lamium himself. The founder possesses a special ability, through which he can locate excavation points. According to the founder, this is not his personal ability, but a form of divine revelation. He claims that a girl appears in his dreams, informing him of the location of undiscovered ruins. This goes against the Order's principle of reality over ideals in terms of taking action. But the fact of the matter is, many rare artifacts have been excavated as a direct result of the founder's dreams. Could this simply be explained as a miracle? What does this Saint, the girl that appears in the founder's dreams wish to entrust us with, and where does she wish to lead us? If the Saint wishes to guide us to the future, let us walk there on our own two feet. That is the way of the Order's doctrine.”
Seems like the cult isn’t a big fan of its patron dream girl.

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“The demons from folklore may have physically disappeared from the planet, but their malice is said to live on within the earth, devouring the planet. This demon's threat is said to exist in the form of shields. Some even theorize that these shields are actually transformed demon corpses. Once the shields are activated, they are said to devour any surrounding life-forms, and transfigure their bodily structure. It is believed that monsters that roam Filgaia today are the direct result of these shields, which affected life-forms during the great war. If these shields still exist today, they may bring about a new threat. Even after a thousand years, are we still unable to escape the threat of the evil corpses?”
Wait. Hold up. Those secret shields from the first chapter can mutate lifeforms into demons? And we had one in our pocket for a solid dungeon or two? And nobody told us to wear gloves? Also: since she was the first to find one, is this the reason Maya is so… Maya?

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Welp, that’s it for the library. We can’t reach those books on the top level (what kind of library requires a freaking grappling hook?), so it is time to go grab some quality wheat.

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See you later, Ark!

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Back to the boat.

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The Filgaia map is such a pain in the ass around these parts. We are that white dot way in the south. Technically, Boot Hill is at the top of the map, but is the bottom of the large central continent. It is confusing that the Filgaia globe was cut in this bizarre manner.

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So, while it looks like a distance away, Boot Hill is actually pretty close.

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Probably only have to fight one giant bug monster along the way.

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See? The way I interpret maps, we just went from South America to the North Pole. It’s weird.

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Really hyping up this wheat.

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Gobs! We must be in the right place.

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Maybe Virginia ran away from home just to escape carb city?

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And here we are. This is our last “hometown” to visit for our party, so you know it is going to be interesting.

Next time on Wild Arms: Tesla breaks down.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
I have never seen two characters embody 'Just Kiss Already!' like Virginia and Maya.

But much like those two gemstones, they would both probably explode if they did that.

(I still cannot believe I didn't pick up on it during my playthrough)
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Giddyap, partner, because today is October 25, Sheriff Day. The spelling of sheriff and chef are very different, but the pronunciation is similar. As a child, I used to get scolded for mixing the two up. The only thing they have in common is they both get mad when mistaken for each other.

Chapter 30: You Can Always Go Home Again (and Again)

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
We learned of The Ark of Destiny’s history of dendrology, and that apparently happened right around where Virginia used to live.

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So let’s check the ol’ homestead for clues.

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Fun fact: there is in fact a hill in Boot Hill. Virginia’s family lives up on said hill. They are loaded.

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As you may expect, every NPC in town has more personalized dialogue for Virginia.

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The rest of the party just gets generic clues that will help them save the world.

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Freaking love that Libera the ARMs-smith has to tell Virginia immediately that he couldn’t save the town from gobs back during her intro because he was visiting his girlfriend in Canada that day.

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Huh! What a weird coincidence!

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Can you only get to Boot Hill if you are on the verge of death? Apparently Roykman, our ever-faithful traveling merchant, was rescued in Boot Hill from a pack of dogs by some mysterious character that is Virginia’s Dad (oops spoilers).

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“Today is October 25, Sheriff Day. The spelling of sheriff and chef are very different, but the pronunciation is similar. As a child, I used to get scolded for mixing the two up. The only thing they have in common is they both get mad when mistaken for each other.”
I feel like I heard this somewhere before.

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“Steer your ship north of the cap where the giant's statue stands, and you'll come to a strait that connects the inland sea and the open seaway. This is also the hunting ground of the monster Balal Quo Naga, where many vessels and Sandcraft meet disaster...Balal Quo Naga used to lurk south of Little Twister near the sunken reefs, but...In recent years, it followed its prey to this strait and made this area its new home. This ferocious monster has shut down scores of trade routes and has taken the lives of hundreds of sailors. Somebody must do something so the people can get on with their lives...”
Yet another clue to yet another quest we will undertake in another ten updates or so.

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“The human brain does not make use of its full potential. There is another world that can still be tapped from the brain. It is possible to study how the brain works through electric signals. The brain is a sea of electric signals where thoughts, memories, and dreams are all merely electric signals reacting. There may have been extreme cases where the memory media of information possesses a structure similar to the memory storage area of the brain. Therefore, it can be said that dreams are electric signals connecting to the brain, just like projecting an image on screen. Perhaps with further research, it may become possible for the brain to act as the media itself, receiving signals from other external sources. Developing this other world of the brain has just begun. I believe this may open up infinite possibilities.”
And this is a “clue” to the whole of the Wild Arms 3 plot. Remember, kiddies, your brain is a computer!

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“Today is just like any other day--sandstorms paint the sky yellow, while the dry wind blows endlessly...It was like this yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, a year ago...Nothing has changed...It's a world I'm used to, but why is there apprehension in my heart? Why do I feel there is something wrong with this unchanging world? This world before us--is this the Filgaia we know? I don't know. No one knows. No one can straight out deny or confirm it. As far as I know, this is the way the world is. But maybe this world was changed without me knowing it? They say the barren wasteland is the result of the great war...But something inside me tells me we shouldn't settle for that answer.”
At least one of Virginia’s dads probably wrote this book.

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Check out Ekatrina Maxwell’s tombstone, and…

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Like in Virginia’s intro, someone has inexplicably left a tiny flower on the grave.

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Virginia, we could still pretend this was a mystery before we actively saw your dad running around. Now you’re just being dense.

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Yes. Thank you for asking.

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Yo.

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“I would have called ahead, but I have a hard time figuring out if our society has phones. I feel like there are hints…”

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“We only had, like, two party wipes!”

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“My girlfriend has shot me a few times, but she recently started using a bo staff, so everything is healing."

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"Living it up" is defined as “finally got used to Jet’s various odors.”

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Summon a god, Virginia! Show 'em the ol' razzle dazzle!

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“This is Jet. He was raised by Daddy, too.”
“What?”

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“Is he still alive?”
“Yeah, he was here for dinner yesterday. He brought churros.”

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“No, my other daddy. Yes your brother you nitwit.”

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“I mean… well… at least something that looked like him. Clive has this theory that everybody is a robot.”
“We can’t rule it out.”

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So after Virginia drops that bombshell, there is the implication that time passes. This is conveyed by how Gallows clearly has the look of a man wondering how to politely ask for a chair.

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“Everything except this coat of his, which I wear every day.”

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“It was small, and I figured I could use it as a coaster.”

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Don’t anybody tell Jet there is a book in the house.

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Jackpot!

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We have seen the name Yggdrasil before, but now we’re going to get a (fake) science lesson.

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It is distinctly noted that the Yggdrasil worked as a “reverse tree”, using its roots to revitalize the ground. It also peed on dogs.

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“Tree good. Planet need tree.”

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Filgaia has some manner of Norse culture confirmed.

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“I mean… kinda? I think it's more of a metaphor…”

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“Sure, Virginia. Sure.”

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“There is a tree somewhere out there” was our clue for the day.

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“Turns out this guy that runs this cult we joined really did see a giant tree.”
“You joined a what?”

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“If the Yggdrasil System exists, then that's where I can find Daddy. I know I don't know for sure, and I might have said that on a whim, but I want to believe it's true!”
Let’s… just let Virginia have this one.

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Everybody is making a lot of assumptions during this update (“A machine from ten years ago that no one has ever seen might solve the biggest mystery on the planet!”), and I would be more annoyed if they weren’t all completely right.

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Gallows just never got to sit down.

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If you see Buddha on the road…

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“Maybe we could play catch?”

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Virginia is still ashamed of her behavior back when they were fighting the murderous machine monster man.

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That is an extremely polite way of telling someone to get out.

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D’aww.

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“Hold your head up high. Also, we turned your room into a walk-in humidor.”

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He literally just asked you to hold your head up.

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We have a moment here where Virginia is the entirety of the party. May as well talk to the folks while we’re alone.

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Guess Shalte wants us to complete all the sidequests…

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“Have you had some of our amazing wheat? You look like you haven’t been having enough wheat.”

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Anywho, we can check out the rest of the place after we reclaim our boys.

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Leaving home keeps getting easier.

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Gallows just wants to find the time to wash his sleeping bag while we’re in town.

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See? We need to do a lot of laundry here.

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So we’re one big happy family again. Want to see what happens when other party members talk to Virginia’s adoptive parents? It isn’t that exciting!

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At least we can loot the place. I missed Jet's radar for the thirty seconds he wasn't available.

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Virginia’s room!

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It is not even subtle that Tesla is the richest guy in town.

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Good news: this isn’t a Persona game, so none of the men in the party say anything overtly creepy or steal Virginia’s underwear.

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And Virginia has a pretty swank balcony. In another life, she could have foregone the gunplay and just hung out here singing to bluebirds.

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“A long time ago, the evil serpent Nidhogg lived by the foot of Yggdrasil. Two giants who didn't get along decided to exterminate this serpent on their own, and each began their journey from two separate directions. Each giant had different reasons for wanting to kill the serpent. The first giant wanted to take the reward all for himself...while the other giant wanted to do the deed for the people. Little did the two giants know that Nidhogg had two heads that worked very well together! So, the two giants ended up inside the serpent's stomach, regretting not cooperating with each other.”
Yet another clue to that Nidhogg quest that is coming up eventually. At least this useless clue doesn’t require a duplicator.

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“After a hundred years of research, an environmental plan to revitalize the planet is about to reach fruition. Many of the businesses that have sponsored this plan have systematically entwined like a tree trunk to form a large tree. It is called the Yggdrasil Project, a plan to replace the guardians as the power that sustains the world in order to bring forth a future. The main engine of the Yggdrasil Project is its powerful generator, which acts as the heart. This is where the planetary energy is produced and distributed through microscopic machines at its roots. The vision of the seven dreamers is about to become reality. We humans must continue to utilize the power of the lost wisdom of Hyades, and bring forth a future for the planet. That is our duty to our children.”
Tesla? Are you sure you didn’t keep any of Werner’s other books?

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“Thank you for your continued patronage. Listed below is my travel route for this fiscal year. Little Rock, Baskar Colony, Boot Hill, Humphrey's Peak, Claiborne, Ballack Rise...Jolly Roger, Laxisland, Little Twister, and finally, Gunner's Heaven. Please be advised that I may be travelling back and forth from the following six locations: Baskar Colony, Boot Hill, Humphrey's Peak, Jolly Roger, Laxisland and Gunner's Heaven.”
A lot of people do not observe that Roykman, the only merchant on Filgaia, will sometimes not be in town. He technically follows a set pattern around the world, and if you repeatedly leave and re-enter the same town, he is likely to be gone. Also, if you remember that Clive’s intro took place in Ballack Rise, you will notice that there are only two locations here we have not seen: Laxisland and Gunner’s Heaven. We are running out of towns…

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Okay, we are looking for a giant tree. We don’t have any distinct directions, but I am sure we will figure something…

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Everybody brake!

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Bum bum buuuuuum!

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“I have been your neighbor for the last fifteen years, you self-centered little..”

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“Oh, you live here? Neat. Anyway, I’ve been stalking you.”

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Don’t you dare hurt that lady that keeps coming up with weird facts about holidays!

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“I mean, right now, at least.”

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Buh?

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Clive is so smart.

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He’s not wrong.

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Play along with the maniac.

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The last one? Man, we ran out of gods quick.

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Shake harder, boy!

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Is it a whole new, evolved planet? We know. They have told us, like, a billion times.

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Janus: about as loyal as a hyena.

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“Hey, weird question. Do you and the Prophets live in a giant tree?”

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… Does Filgaia have baseball? Or just baseball metaphors?

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Such a power move to walk through the party when you can just teleport.

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“Um? Directions?”

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Haven’t we already confirmed that the guy named for a Roman two-faced god might be a bit duplicitous?

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And that is the last thing you say before teleporting away.

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Drop the mic if you’ve got it.

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“So Janus didn’t mark anything on our map. Gallows?”

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Dammit.

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At least put in a token effort, Gallows.

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“I might not have enough smarts to actually help, but I’m going to try!”

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The math on that might be difficult, as the Guardians are literally being drained of their physical essence. What would be a thousand times worse than that?

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So Gallows doesn’t know where to go, but Granny might. Let’s visit two different hometowns this update.

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Shoot some gobs on the way out for old time’s sake.

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As one of the NPCs notes, there is a train station near Boot Hill.

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Poorly named. This is not only not a farm, but north and south barely mean anything on Wild Arms 3’s goofy map.

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This is the train station from the end of Virginia’s prologue/start of the “group” prologue. That is likely the only reason it looks significantly different from other train stations. Having to appear in a cutscene really inflates the budget!

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Good to hear he is doing well!
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See this nonsense? If “Southfarm” was a little more south, it would be at the North Pole. Stupid map…

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This is going on your performance review, Tony.

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Anywho, the fastest way back to Baskar is via train. You may want to take the Sandcraft back, though, as you will need it parked there soon enough…

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While you’re in the area, be sure to check on how your garden grows. If you are following the general flow of the plot, this may be the first time you’re back in the area since setting off from Jolly Roger.

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And then it’s just a quick gallop back to Gallows’s home.

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So cutesy.

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No shouting at the holy site!

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Do teachers ever have students just show up and start shouting questions for stuff they should have learned, like, years ago?

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And we have been to four. For those keeping track, there is the shrine from the intro/Guardian fights, the one by Clive’s house/wedding, the spot where we fought Malik by Little Twister, and that totally dead shrine by the lab.

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And our last shrine belongs to the Guardian of Time.

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“Everything in this world moves forward according to the cog the cat spins, only to succumb to the fate of falling down. If you listen closely to the cat and cog, the sound is that of paradise.”
Is… that supposed to be helpful? Do we… need to collect more cats in Chrono Trigger or something?

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Thank you, Gallows.

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“This is why I never come home, Granny!”

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How does it state that? How!?

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Finally got our directions, time to go.

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“And we already stalled out enough having to talk to gramma.”

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Clive and Granny should hang out.

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“Not in front of my friiii~ends.”

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And she is so happy about that.

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I… think this counts as a compliment?

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Gallows actually takes the compliment graciously! He has matured!

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Her “hidden agenda” sounds a lot less sinister when you consider that agenda involves saving the world.

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Everybody is getting praise from their fake parents this update. Next, Jet is going to be told he’s doing well by that horse he imagines is his mom.

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“Oh by the way, Granny, I may have joined a cult yesterday.”

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Such a magnanimous priestess of a dying religion.

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“Choose poorly, and the world will come to an end. No pressure.”

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I mean… yeah? Depending on how things go at the last Guardian shrine, there may not be any gods left…

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“Ah ha ha, no. I am not willing to sacrifice a pizza for these guys.”

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So Granny suggests everyone stay the night, because we haven’t sacrificed enough time on the way to the Time Guardian already.

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Gallows is having trouble sleeping.

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Time to go have a conversation with General Leo.

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The following morning…

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Shock!

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“Would you like to share with the rest of the class?”

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You can tell this plan is going to work, because the audience doesn’t get to hear it.

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But it’s a doozy.

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What mysterious plan has Gallows cooked up? Better tune in next…

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Eh, little update still left.

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The entire plan rests on Gallows? Oh, this should end well…

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Hope for the best!

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Okay, now we are going to take a break. We had to get through a whole lot of exposition this week, but next time we are going full spelunking.

Next time on Wild Arms: It’s about time.
 

Mogri

Round and round I go
(he)
Staff member
Moderator
Looking forward to seeing how you carry out a plan that the game chose not to divulge to you.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
"Ok now's the time to execute that plan we all talked about and memorized. Ok go!"

Kinda appreciate a bad guy that goads the party into a trap by telling them straight up This Is A Trap. Even Admiral Ackbar would be tempted to go along with it.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
I was hoping someone else would have an answer...

Okay, so that thing is definitely a Naga. It has a human-ish top half, and a snakey bottom half. That part is obvious.

The rest of the name? Quo is basically Latin for "where", which kinda sorta makes sense for a creature that notably travels the world to two distinct locales. And "balal" is Maltese for bullets. Balal Quo Naga does not shoot at you, but it does seem like an appropriate title in a game/world that is so reliant on gunplay. Seems like something the locals might call a monster, like how reality has bombardier beetles. I realize that "it's Maltese" seems like an outside chance of being relevant, but Wild Arms has a tendency to sample all sorts of languages (a commenter on my site just reminded me that "Lilka" of Wild Arms 2 is distinctly Polish [for Lilly]). So... maybe?

Anyway, aside from all that, but my guess is "it just kinda sounds cool".
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Everybody get excited because today is November 1, Dry Bones Day. There was a dog that buried dry bones. Worried that someone might come and take them, he stayed close to watch guard. The dog was later found as dry bones himself.

Chapter 31: Clocktower: The Struggle

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Virginia saw her uncle, Gallows saw his granny, and now we’re going to fight to save all of space and time.

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So here we are, still in Baskar.

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Every other NPC is now talking about Nidhogg and Yggdrasil. We are so close to the quest that makes that relevant!

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Eh, I don’t wanna.

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Our next destination
is Infinitum, and it is super close to Baskar… except for that danged sand sea. Going to have to retrieve the Sandcraft.

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Excuse me? I have never forgotten a cat in my life. I would tell you the name of my first cat, but then I would have to reset all my security questions...

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Okay! Off to see the magical cat god!

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So we have to head back to the train station, because the Sandcraft did not follow us back to Jolly Roger.

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Back to Southfarm Station (near Boot Hill), and back to the boat.

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So Boot Hill was our last major destination, and it is practically at the North/South pole (stupid map). Baskar/Infinitum is located at about the middle of the map, so we have a long way to go.

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On the way, we find this mysterious island at the Huskarl Sand Canal Strait. Using the radar here reveals a statue.

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Hey guess what! More Nidhogg nonsense!

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So all those NPCs and books are clues to our next-next destination. There are two giant statues on this map, and where their gazes intersect is the location of an upcoming dungeon. We found one statue! And we could find the other one! … But this was more on the way…

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Moving on.

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This beastie looks threatening, but it is only a color swap of an actually relevant monster. All that talk of Balal Quo Naga? That is this thing's twin.

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Eat cannon, jerk.

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Okay! Here we are! As advertised, this stop is just across the “sea” from Baskar. If you need a free rest at an inn, just move your Sandcraft about three feet over yonder.

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Using the radar once you’re ashore will reveal a big honking tower.

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Infinitum is technically a new location for the Wild Arms franchise. That said, Dan Dairam the Time Guardian did appear in Wild Arms (1), and there he was hiding in the Temple of Illusion, accessible only through the Rings of Timespace. And the Rings of Timespace were just outside that version of Baskar, so Infinitum is a quasi-reference to OG Wild Arms.

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Second thoughts about the plan?

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“... Bound by the lineage and destiny of priesthood...I couldn't bear it. That was until yesterday...I rebelled and left Baskar, but that didn't change a thing...I couldn't find the freedom I was looking for…”
If you want a traditional JRPG “character focus dungeon”, we have got great news for you.

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True freedom is the ability to control all of time.

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You don’t need to know the rest of that sentence. Virginia is just admiral ackbar’ing out.

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Freedom isn’t free! It costs gods.

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Turns out the plan was pretty simple.

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“Infinite Tum” is what they call me down at the Golden Corral.

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So it is a Wild Arms 3 temple dungeon. Ho-hum.

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And there are monsters. Who would have thought?

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Your opponents for today are Delphins. They are like Dolphins, but less friendly.

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Delphins may be accompanied by Premium Delphins. They do not seem to drop any extra rewards, and…

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They waste their turns standing around being premium. I… think they are a joke?

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Whatever. Just blast them with bullets or wind.

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Let’s get to why we’re all here: vaguely time-related puzzles!

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Straight-forward task: rotate this wheel until the gears line up with each other, so you get one solid line of dominos.

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There are two wheels to manipulate here, and, if you are smarter than a toddler, you shouldn’t have any issues.

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I think I figured this out! There are these hallways where nothing happens, because battles do not play nicely with puzzles. So every Wild Arms 3 dungeon has this rhythm of puzzle room – boring hallway – repeat so there are places where the encounter system can activate without interruptions. Only took half the game to figure that out!

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Also, I think Premium Delphins are just here to spoil the multi-targeting abilities. Your party should be over level 25 by now (“real” playthrough party is currently level 29/30), so you can start fights by using an elemental gem with Virginia’s mystic or Gallows’s extension abilities. Both cost 25 FP, and your FP count equals your level at the start of every battle. There is no benefit to “saving” FP after a battle, and random mook battles rarely last past two turns anyway, so just go ahead and hit every monster’s weakness right out of the gate.

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A little further ahead, we see an old friend.

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We know.

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Help. I’m having Xenosaga flashbacks. I need an adult.

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“Yes, I heard you come in. I’m not just talking to a wall.”

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I appreciate that they are laying down the bones of “Janus is actively betraying his masters” here, but “it’s the last guardian shrine” should be the easy answer. If Gallows was on the ball, we wouldn’t even need Janus’s help.

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No answers! Only questions!

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We know because you told us. A lot.

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You know, we get a lot of information on the Prophets and their fall from grace and all that nonsense. But we never really get an explanation on how they got so good at summoning monsters. One would assume it came from some Hyades information, but you have to wonder who they were summoning monsters against before our party showed up. It’s been ten years!

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Regardless, they are definitely good at mustering up uglies.

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“Even widdle demon kittens?”
Especially widdle demon kittens!”

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“I would kind of like to be a demon.”
“Shut-up, Jet.”

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Good news! You will not have to sign any paperwork to become a demon!

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Unfortunately, being a Prophet is taxing, so Leehalt is down and out before we even start shooting.

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Leehalt! Yo! Don’t teleport away now! You forgot your monster!

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Fine, we’ll play with it.

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If you have Fire Ward, or the ability to confer Fire Ward on a character, do it now. This would not be a waste of a Fire Ring, as Fire Ward will be essential to a super boss fight at way the heck the end of the game, and it's not like skills expire.

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I mean, this thing is named Pyrodrake. What element do you think it is going to use?

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Amusingly enough, it is not strong against fire, but water. However, as vaguely expected, it is weak to ice.

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But don’t think ice magic is the only way to win here. Pyrodrake enjoys using physical attacks…

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And being huge.

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It also has a single-target fire “spell” in the form of bowsering fireballs at you.

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Now here is the trick…

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Pyrodrake is very weak to ice magic, but it will counter its weakness with Volcannon Trap every time. This is a multi-hit fire spell, and, if you have your entire party use ice magic in one turn (through ice gems for whoever isn’t equipped with the water medium) you will die.

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However, that doesn’t even matter if you are equipped with Fire Ward, and thus negate all fire damage. Regardless, your options here are either to use basic attacks, or use ice magic if you can soak up the flames. Either way, not too much of a fight.

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Mini boss down.

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These blocks over here are way too conspicuous to not play with.

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And then boom.

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Treasure! Not going to think about why Clive’s daughter’s favorite book series has a copy hidden in a wall in an ancient shrine, but I’ll take it.

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Virginia got ambushed by the other thing skulking around Infinitum’s halls. These manticore dorks are all about the wind magic and being speedy. I think they also poison, but don’t quote me on that.

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After obtaining the treasure, these blocks can be manipulated to form a handy bridge.

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Unfortunately, the way forward is blocked.

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But this thing might be useful.

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Time to stick the Baskar dude in the front.

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Oh…kay?

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“Yeah, I understand. It's the lineage of the priesthood that flows within me, and the destiny that I carry, right? If I have the qualifications of a priest, open up---darn it!”
Stop yelling at the inanimate object that has been sitting there for centuries! It’s not like…

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Oh, guess that worked.

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Going up.

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Now we’re getting into the good stuff.

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We have swinging pendulums here, and you must position your characters so they get “hit” by the pendulum, and swung over to the switch platforms.

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Or toward treasure. That is always good, too.

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And use a boomerang to activate pendulums.

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Might be needing that soon…

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Action scene!

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Timing!

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Looks like Gallows just has to agree with inscriptions to proceed here.

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Whatever gets us through the tower.

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If you are unaware, Wild Arms 4 wound up featuring straight up 2-D platforming sections during many of its dungeons and set pieces. A lot of people were surprised that the “traditional JRPG franchise” decided to include such “action game” conventions amongst its random battles and hours of dialogue. But anyone that played Wild Arms 3 wasn’t surprised! There are two dungeons that contain a lot of wannabe platforming BS in WA3, and this is one of them. Welcome to cog hell!

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Technically these are all “walking puzzles”, but timing is key here.

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And I’m not convinced the Wild Arms 3 system is 100% ready for these kinds of challenges. The cogs have to be aligned juuuuuust right, or you will fall and have to repeat the room from the entrance.

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See? This is rubbish.

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At least you don’t have to reactivate any switches if you fall. So there are basically built-in checkpoints. Somebody realized this room might be frustrating…

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So close!

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Okay, we’re done with that now. Let us never speak of it again.

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Let’s roll!

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Rolling commences.

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One more clock puzzle for the road.

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Did you graduate kindergarten? Do you know how a watch works? Wild Arms 3 challenges you to count to twelve.

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So you have to light the torches in order from one to twelve. The trick here is that if you shoot “in” to the clock, you will inadvertently light other number torches, and you will have to start back at one.

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So “proceed with the inner flow” and only toss fire cards from the inside-out.

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Twelve!

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Solving the puzzle opens the door forward and resets to clock to match your system time.

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See? Got the Playstation 5 proving it is 11:41 and everything.
Anywho, we have all but completed the dungeon now, and the “plan” is a bit of a doozy, so we’ll save that for the next update. Hope you enjoy that… timing.

Next time on Wild Arms: So Wild Arms 3 totally stole this bit from Breath of Fire 1, but nobody ever got that far in Breath of Fire 1, so it is okay.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Theres shall be no former ghoul joining us today, November 8, Grown-up's Day. Libera told me that growing up means learning to give things up. Does that mean I have to give up my favourite food?

Chapter 32: For Whom the Cat Meows

Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Our team climbed a clock-themed tower. After clearing a number of traps that had the solution of “talk to the Baskar guy”, they have reached the apex.

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Or… just about. We quit last time in an elevator.

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Now we’re on top!

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A few treasures to greet us at the chock. The chocktower is complete.

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And now for the fireworks.

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This is Alice in Wonderland, and Janus has always been the hare that leads Virginia down the rabbit hole.

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Asgard is… I dunno… Tweedle Dum.

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Gee, do you think maybe they both work for the same guys?
Aren’t you supposed to be the smart one…

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Oh! Right! The plan! It failed to account for a regular-sized robot.

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As if Gallows was ever going to have a response that wasn’t “wing it”.

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“Hey! We’re still adjusting our equipment! Give us another minute!”

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Asgard feels sad about not having emotions, but they feel excited for a fight.

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“It is also… the only time… I get out of… the house.”

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“Punching you… fun.”

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Sucks that Asgard keeps trying to kill us (and is sometimes successful), but at least they’ve got a reason.

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Always pushing his work off on the ‘bot…

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Asgard fight!

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Yes, but they are terrible at working together. Did you bonk your head on the way up, Clive?

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“Small favors! Shoot the golem!”

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So Asgard again. Unlike some of their compatriots, Asgard is a different boss fight each time.

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Asgard really, really wants to kill you all with Fortress of the Gods, the move that murdered everybody the last time…

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But, presumably thanks to Werner’s jammer, it will literally never work. That “Power at 0%” message will be continual through the whole battle, and it will never reach a viable percentage.

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But that doesn’t mean this fight is all rainbows and puppycats.

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Literally every hit Asgard takes will be countered. And, given Asgard is a solid steel (or something) golem, they hit hard.

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Yeah yeah, 0%... Anywho, so the strategy here is that you can take as long as you like with healing and restoring, just so long as you always make sure an attacker has more HP than Asgard’s counter-hit. Or, put another way, just have your bulkier dudes (Gallows, Clive) lay on the offense, and let your more fragile party members heal the tanks.

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This battle was barely a speed bump in the “Level 100” playthrough, but know that if you don’t like watching your party die, an “average” leveled party might take for freaking ever. That is definitely what happened on my PS5 playthrough…

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And then the fish guy comes to play.

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…. In a different fight.

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Okay! We fought Melody and Asgard together, looks like the next battle is going to be Janus and Asgard together.

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This could be difficult, as both Janus and Asgard were (separately) responsible for our only canon losses.

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And they both harness some kind of ancient power that we barely understand.

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And it’s not like we have leveled up all that much from any of the fights where Janus was tossing off multi-hit, super strong attacks. Between Janus hitting everyone, and Asgard’s single-target, big damage…

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… Oh. Maybe we don’t have to worry about all that.

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So… uh… Janus just goes ahead and stabs the crap out of Asgard.

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And he makes it clear that this was something he had been formulating for a while.

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And while the two bad guys are playing, Gallows dashes forward.

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The plan! It’s the plan!

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Three turns will kill him
Three turns will chill him
Why don’t we all waste
Three turns!

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Three people, three rounds.

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You know, there are exactly two instances in Wild Arms 3 of there being a three-person party. One lasts for a bit of a dungeon, and the other is exactly one (this) fight. And I am impressed they bothered to space the GUI so appropriately for a trio.

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Janus is still not participating, so Asgard is up to plate despite his robo-entrails spilling out.

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That hit from Janus got everything going again, so Asgard will go all out on their strongest offense.

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Assuming you are not at, like, 12 HP from the previous battle, there is no reason you cannot simply defend for three turns and call it a day. That said, if you have the power to do it, you can defeat Asgard and earn some rewards (which Gallows will not receive).

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Gallows is still talkin’ Baskar at ancient monuments.

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There was that bit of lore a little while back that the Baskar were once a lot more overtly scientific in this world, and all the shrines are less “worship sites” and more “god sucking machines”. Here is how one of those machines works.

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Chaka boom.

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Some manner of starry portal opens up overhead.

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“But I woke up too late for breakfast too many times to be happy!”

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“I mean, I made a pretty rad toothpick sculpture, but that was about it.”

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Umm… sure. That sounds right.

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Gallows just bleeding character development at this point.

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“Nobody wants some scaley dude to be president!”

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Eat destiny!

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Things are looking stormy.

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Janus decides to go with what he knows, and stabs Asgard again. Right in the mean bean machine!

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“Wow! Neat portal up there! Want to investigate, Asgard? Here, let me help you.”

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Little fuzzy here, but it looks like Asgard is going for a trip.

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Aaaaand they’re gone. Portal is deactivated, and Asgard has gone off to Guardians know where (or when).

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Looks like that was it. Good plan, generally, but a little off on who was the target.

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“Was tearing space and time a new one hard?”

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So Asgard has been sent somewhere in time, which is about the best way you can hope to stop a sentient invincible fortress. And I’m sure the fact that they are immortal will have no impact on time travel shenanigans.

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Oh, you’re still here?

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So just to review: Janus baited the gang into coming here, everyone knew it was a trap, the gang devised a clever plan to end Janus once and for all, but Janus was expecting something like that, so he dragged along Asgard so Asgard would take the bullet meant for him. It is like a plot from Death Note, but without two characters explaining it for fifteen minutes.

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So now the Prophets’ most loyal/effective weapon is gone forever. Janus got everything he ever wanted.

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“But what if we just shoot you?”

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Gasp! He knows about the tree!

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Finally! All those Nidhogg clues were getting tiring.

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So Janus’s ultimate goal seems to be letting his villainous bosses and our heroes duke it out, and then he will conquer whatever remains. Plan has been working well so far!

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“Welp! Gotta go tell the prophets their robot is gone!”

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Oh? Really Gallows? You can't create localized blackholes normally?

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So Janus and/or the Prophets did not drain a Guardian of its lifeforce for once, as we went and did that ourselves. The end result is the same, though: new medium! Yay!

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“But now we get new magic spells, so it’s not all bad.”

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This is literally the first guardian that has actively done something (other than be a summons) to help the cause.

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So we kinda sorta know the way to find Janus/The Prophets/Yggdrasil now. We must get past Nidhogg.

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Where is Nidhogg? Well, if you didn’t already catch all the clues available up to this point, Clive falls short of outright stating “talk to everybody”.

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And that’s that for that dungeon.

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Baskar is an extremely short Sandcraft trip to the East, so stop back at Gallows’s home for snacks and tea with Granny.

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“God is dead, Granny.”
“No, he has nine lives.”

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Speaking of ol’ Dan, here is the Cosmic Cog medium. It increases physical/magical defense, speed, and evasion. I have always found it to be a good fit for Jet.

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Dan Dairam was an optional Guardian in the previous two Wild Arms games. His existence here is a bit of a downgrade from previously being one of the best Guardians you could ever find, but one would expect that when he goes from “super secret” to “plot mandatory”. All that said, Death Status Ward, SOS Guard, and Eagle Eye are some of the best skills in the game. Instant-death attacks are common in the future, SOS Guard increases defense when the chips are down, and Eagle Eye prevents ambushes and “only one character can fight” encounters. Other party members can still be ambushed, though, so we will have to see about getting Eagle Eye on other mediums…

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Dan has some extremely situational spells in his repertoire. If you never noticed, there isn’t a run command in Wild Arms 3 (as your “run” is more or less supposed to be based on canceling encounters before they start), so Escape is your only option for ending a fight if it goes south. Reset is similar, and is that Final Fantasy 5 classic that will take the battle back to the start if things are going poorly. Only issue is it requires 100 FP, and if things are so desperate you need to reset the battle, you are unlikely to have the much FP banked. Banish is an instant-death spell that costs 48 FP, and will be ignored as the waste of a turn that it is.

The interesting one here is Replay. It has a steep cost, too (100 FP, literally the maximum FP you can ever have), but can be wildly effective in a pinch. It works not unlike Final Fantasy’s mime: you target a character, and, if they survive a round, they will repeat their same action again at the end of the round. Unfortunately, this action is bound by game limits, so, if you have a character “repeat” using an item, or taking an action that requires FP, and they already exhausted said item/FP, it will fail. That said, if an enemy has an elemental weakness, doubling up a mage’s attack turn can make a huge difference. Or, if he’s got the ammo, a maxed-out “fight” command from Clive can be debilitating when doubled. Additionally, replaying Virginia mystic’ing a party healing berry effectively expands your healing potential. So, long story short, Replay isn’t game breaking, but it can really help in a pinch.

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And speaking of using all of your FP, here is Dan’s summon. System Chronos is the only summons in the game that completely ignores the standard of one-time damage or healing.

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Summoning Dan will pause all time for every character except the summoner. From there, depending on how much FP was expended, said character can use 1-4 rounds of uninterrupted nonsense.

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Keep in mind that, by virtue of using a summons, you will “start” the free rounds with 0 FP. But from there you can do anything you normally would, and FP accrues normally. If you want to heal the party or unload a bunch of bullets on your opponent, you can do whatever you want. Just keep in mind that healing/damage does not technically add up until time resumes, so if you are using System Chronos against a group of monsters, remember not to waste turns on killing something that is already dead.

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And then time resumes, and whatever you did will be done. Seconds after this message, that poor balloon burst into a billion pieces.

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And that’s that for our time adventure. Now let’s hunt down Janus and avenge that robot we never liked!

Next time on Wild Arms: Two dungeons for the price of one.
 

SpoonyBard

Threat Rhyme
(He/Him)
Asgard spent so much time acting hostile to Janus in the past, wonder why he wasn't as defensive this time and just let himself be stabbed?

Ah well. Doesn't matter. He's gone now. Probably forever.
 

gogglebob

The Goggles Do Nothing
(he/him)
Asgard spent so much time acting hostile to Janus in the past, wonder why he wasn't as defensive this time and just let himself be stabbed?

It is theoretically answered by Janus: in the past, Asgard's masters were right there. Now it is just Janus and Asgard, so Asgard isn't on guard. Asgard identified Janus was a threat to the prophets, but the poor bot didn't think they would ever be the target...
 

Mr Bean

Chief Detective
Ah well. Doesn't matter. He's gone now. Probably forever.

Yes. Throwing a functionally immortal being who learns from every experience into a time hole will have no repercussions whatsoever.

I think the prophets might have thought a little too deep programming Asgard: they were so busy making sure he’d protect them from Janus stabbing them in the back they never considered he’d stab the robot right in the front.
 

Mogri

Round and round I go
(he)
Staff member
Moderator
I love that the characters of Wild ARMs have an in-universe understanding of combat rounds.
 
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