Here there be dragons. Let's Play Bahamut Lagoon!

VicViper and Wh.Mage is the only answer. Their child will burn us with its love.

Brandon and Truffle! Many heads meets many bodies! And eyes. I'm hoping the offspring will be a bunch of floating dragon heads with wings! Or maybe a bunch of cyclopean heads attached to one truck, with wings coming out of each of the heads! I'll take either.

Actually, imagining the two copulate is pretty funny too.

I wonder which one would be on top OH WAIT NO FUCK

All I'm saying is, it could be better than tentacle porn. Especially if Truffle is the male. Of course, there are a bunch of heads on Brandon....ahh, too much!

All righty, I'm going to play the chapter now. Any other votes for a dragon pairing before I do? Hopefully something decisive, but if not I'll probably just call it by coin toss.

I was actually thinking Brandon and Viper for multi-headed burninating, but I realize that vote doesn't help you at all. Hell, I guess I'll go for Brandon/Truffle. What could go wrong?

Aah, I could've used that vote earlier. :/ I've already played through the chapter and the coin toss went to VicViper/Wh.MAGE, so... yeah. Here's what the resultant pairing would've turned out like, though:



Update should be done in a few hours, so stay tuned.

Aw man. I had this whole scenario built up in my head, where the game progresses and you have a new dragonkeeper because the former one was driven mad by witnessing the mating of Brandon/Truffle.

I have no way to celebrate this without looking like a sore winner, so I'll just say pip pip, good show.

My vote was chosen, ain't that a corker?

Come now, everyone. This is supposed to be a joyous time! A new dragon is going to be born into the world, so let's celebrate his coming. Besides, we have yet to pick a name...

Anyway, welcome back. Last we left off, we fought off the otherworldly invaders, stopping their assault on the Church of Memories, only for PANTS to be rebuffed by BRIEFS in favour of the former Granbelos General, Palpaleos.

Join us now as we bid (not really)...





Taicho: ...... We men must endure... PANTS has an even more difficult situation than we...

Matelite: But... Palpaleos is an enemy general... He was Sauzer's right-hand man! He's a bad guy... Not like PANTS!

It's amusing that Matelite's more focused on PANTS's love triangle than on the possibility that Sauzer may or may not have sent Palpaleos as a spy. In fact, it's odd that it doesn't even cross his mind...

Taicho: General Palpaleos is a good person! He was chosen by BRIEFS... I will believe so, to the very end...

Doesn't help that Taicho keeps defending him, I guess.

Taicho: Matelite, have you ever thought about it? About the war... I joined the Resistance to liberate Mahal... And for one other reason... I told you about it once before... I also joined for the sake of my wife, Celine... And to defeat Lestat and liberate Mahal...

Taicho: And I did that... I was the captain! I broke through and fought the vanguard! I wiped out a great many of their soldiers, and... Even so... I would imagine the faces of the soldiers under their steel helmets... I am even weaker than you, Matelite... Their faces would twist and distort... They would become twisted as I struck them with my battle axe... Certainly, the soldiers were fighting for the sake of somebody they believed in as well... For their beloved wives... For their respected Emperor... Or for something even greater... That is the nature of war... Sometimes I am frightened... I want the war to end soon...

I, uh... wow.



That Battlefield Salesman, he always knows what to say.

Battlefield Salesman: The castle is already surrounded by the Imperial Army!

Lady: There must be a real reason for them to ignore Sauzer, who is extremely sick. Listen. Real adults should not ask things like that!!

Harsh.



I'm right here, you know.



Sendak: They say to me, "Old man... Old man... Weak-minded old man..." They're harassing me...

Um... talk to the ship's counselor, I suppose? Wait, we don't have one, do we...



Well... PANTS may not like you personally, but I can't deny you're usefulness. So... no?

Matelite: ......



Man, he just joined the team and he's already giving orders. Pushy guy, isn't he?



The Battlefield Salesman and his life have a bunch of new stuff to sell us, but...



Our dragons have been running out of juice pretty early in the previous fights, and a nice boost to MP is just what they need. So instead of stocking up on items and refitting our weapons and armor again, we'll be blowing it all on a crapload of Magic Gins.

Speaking of which, time to feed!

For the record, you have no idea how happy I am to have the image limit boosted to 15. It means that I can get the dragonfeeding done in one or two posts instead of ten!



Anyway, Wh.MAGE's Fire stat is still unmaxed, so she takes the Earth Grass for herself. Just a little bit more, and she'll be done.

Calzone's Ice stat is a little low too... I may have to drop a few Piro on getting it up to snuff.



Fortunately, Truffle's Fire stat finally reaches the big one-double-oh. His contribution to our Summoner's efforts shall prove fruitful.



Yeah, yeah. I'm coming.



Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to present you our final team allocations. With PANTS, Palpaleos and Matelite heading the physical squads, they'll be able to take on the enemy groups in melee battles with relish. With the Knights giving them a nice boost to their critical chances, the Heavy Armors giving them a chance to defend automatically, and the Light Armors drastically boosting their movement range and making sure they'll always go first, they'll be practically unstoppable once they're fully equipped.

On the back lines will be our three mage groups, the Wizards raining death from afar and manipulating terrain, the Priests keeping everyone well-healed while also chipping away at enemies, and the Summoners anihilating everything in range with the Holy Dragons. The Assassins will mostly be on standby, but when the Summoners run out of MP they may very well prove helpful, their assassination techniques having a chance of instantly killing a group of opponents, something which is always handy.



As for the others, they served us well but they'll be sitting on the sidelines for the rest of the game. It's a shame we can't field more than six dragons at a time, as the Lancer group could deal out some serious hurt with their field techniques, but alas we can't so they have to sit things out.

As for the Mini-Devils... well, they suck and will always suck. Sure, a properly trained dragon could give them useful skills, but I'm not fond of luck-based abilities and I prefer a squad with a more reliable means of dealing damage.



With that all said, let's test out our groups and see how they perform...



Matelite: ......... Exactly!



Palpaleos pretty much gave the strategy for the battle away - fight them while they're still separated and take them out one-by-one. Thankfully, this is pretty easy due to their formations, as you'll see in the battle.



Our first order of business is to freeze a path over to the landmass to the west, where we'll find the first two generals, Zomberd and Lestat. By the time the other two generals, Babarella and Irvine, reach us, they'll most likely be finished off, freeing us to take them out as well.



Note that, though Leviathan's range is impressive as it is, it's not quite enough to adequately bridge the two parts. Good thing PANTS and Palpaleos are available to finish up the job.

Our dragons start attacking the squads guarding the two generals, taking some (meager) damage in return. At this point, our dragons are so far ahead of the competition that we can just set them to Attack and watch them win the battle for us, but that would be boring wouldn't it?



As planned, Babarella and Irvine start their approach south, but are too slow to actually make it in time.



Gotta love Garuda.



In any case, the battles go down exactly as you'd expect them to at this point - our field attacks anihilate the small fry, leaving the bosses alone defenseless.



Lestat goes down first, netting us an Empress Kahna, the strongest Staff in the game. The downside is that only our Summoners can use them, but thankfully those two are the ones that could use the magic boost the most.



Zomberd goes next, dropping a significantly less awesome Master Rod as spoils.



At this point, the other generals start to reach us, but we're more than prepared to deal with them.



Like the others before them, the small fry fall like wheat to the scythe, leaving the generals wide open.

Unlike Zomberd and Lestat however, Babarella and Irvine have access to some moderately-powerful field attacks to use. They don't show up often, but be careful of them nonetheless.



That aside, they're not particularly strong, and can be worn down just as easily as the others.



VicViper brings down Irvine, grabbing another Empress Kahna for us. Normally he'll drop Excalibur if you finish him with a Holy elemental attack, but this is almost as good. Besides, this is hardly the last we'll see of him anyway.



Next goes Babarella. She drops a Pax Kahna, the best armor for Matelite. Needless to say, he'll be wearing this baby for a while.



All that's really left to do at this point is to head east and take out Gudolf, but Gudolf's a particularly nasty boss if you're not careful. As such, taking out his guards first is the wisest course of action at the moment.



Things... go exactly as you'd expect them to. Nothing to see here, move along...



Yep.



I think that's all of them. Now, for Gudolf...



Gudolf may seem like a normal boss at first, having a cadre of guards to follow him and a slightly-stronger-than-normal attack...

However, once you knock him down below half his max HP, he changes into a much nastier form. When red, Gudolf is capable of casting Nightmare 99, which will take off 75% of a character's current HP. Note that this affects your dragons too, and things can turn for the worse very quickly if you haven't finished off his allies yet.

He can also cast a moderately powerful fire spell as well, so make sure to keep your team well-healed just-in-case.



This is probably the most damage you'll see dealt in the course of the normal game, provided you don't try the ridiculously-difficult Hard Dungeon later on.



Still, despite my warnings, Gudolf's only deadly if he's not alone, which he very much is in this case. With a swing from Palpaleos's blade, he goes down for the count.



We'll be seeing more of him, to be sure.



But for now? Sweet, sweet victory.





-

Later...



Taicho: ...... Okay then! I shall be the first one inside!



Only a few minutes inside and Taicho's already sizing up the place. And... is that who I think it is on the throne?



When'd he get here? How'd he get here?



Yeah, you'd know that wouldn't you? Slacker.

In a minute.



Rush: But you know, PANTS,,, Are you really that happy?

... Sure?

Rush: Yeah... It's the revival of Kahna, after all...



Truce: Lately he's been eating a lot less and have even lost weight... Could something be bothering him?

Sorry, can't tell you - made a pact, y'know?



Barclay's got the skinny on Matelite, it seems...

Barclay: First of all, he started selling autographed armor and axes... For what reason do you think? The truth is... it was to rebuild Kahna Castle, which was supposed to be in ruins, with his own money. But, when he came and saw it, this was how it was. Perfectly intact, like it was brand new... He's really depressed.

So he's sad because his home's perfectly intact, and he doesn't have to pay to fix it back up? Man, I don't think I'll ever be able to understand that guy.



Frederica: Everybody has somebody waiting for them... But don't you think it's strange?

How so?

Frederica: Anastasia... Lately he's been real friendly with that Barclay. He must be an old flame!



Oh for the love of- What now?

Frenze and Reeve: He said we'd be friends when we were back in our hometown of Kahna! But... the friendship was fake. We just pretended to be friends... *sniff* Achooooo!!



Sendak: "This is not the end... The new era is not yet upon us..." Or something. But why did they have to tell me...



Taicho: It is unfortunate, with tonight being the night of Kahna's revival.

Mmm, shame about that.

Anyway, what did the Dragonkeeper want with us again?



Dragonkeeper: Umm... ahem... Do you want to know how to have children?

...... I'm an adult, you know!

Dragonkeeper: I'm talking about dragons!

Oh! Then sure.

Dragonkeeper: It's the season for dragons to be in love. Look, look... They're excited. Look... If you do this... Ouch!! It bit me...

Watch yourself there, DK. I don't think they're in the mood.

Dragonkeeper: In other words, they're dangerous. In addition, they won't listen to your orders. Well then, let's have a couple of dragons marry. That way, the others will give up and behave peacefully!

Oh, if only things were that simple in real life.

Dragonkeeper: By the way, how are things with you?

...Don't ask.

Dragonkeeper: The entire crew is talking about you. Well, I guess you haven't given up yet! I put my money on you, PANTS...

Oh lord, they set up a betting pool for the triangle. I wonder what the odds are on Palpaleos...

Dragonkeeper: Okay... Choose a mother and father dragon! Oh, that's right... Do you know which ones are girls? And, when the time comes, things will be difficult, so give them some food to keep them quiet! Okay, Choose a mother and father dragon!



Okay, I'll just choose these two then...



Since there wasn't a clear winner at the time of playing this, I decided the whole thing by coin toss, with one taking heads and the other tails. Out of five flips, VicViper/Wh.MAGE won the most, so we'll be going with that pairing for this run.

By the way...

Hey peanut gallery!

Our baby dragon's gonna need a name. Come up with a good one for me, will ya? Any of the names originally mentioned in the first page of this thread are still valid, by the way.



Dragonkeeper: Okay! We'll be returning to Papillon, so go and enjoy the night of Kahna's revival!

Yeah, thanks for that.

Battlefield Salesman: A lot has happened, but you've done very well to come this far! My getting back together with the Misses [sic] is also because you bought so much from me...

Lady: This is in celebration of the revival of Kahna! Of course I'll let you have it for free!

I'm not sure if whether or not this is determined by how much you by from the two, but hey! Free items are always great in my book.

The items include:
-Cross Knight Ultimate Equipment 3-Set: Gneisenau, Imperator, Black Prince
-Iron Duke, Pax Kahna
-Really Erotic Book, Princess's ???



Palpaleos: PANTS... I wish to escort Princess BRIEFS to the castle, would you like to come too?

Sure, I guess? I'm sure this isn't at all awkward.



Missed the screenshot, but a shadowy-figure (Matelite) just handed BRIEFS something.

BRIEFS: Thank you...

Palpaleos: Sorry, but Princess BRIEFS will be changing into a dress... Please leave her in my care. Well then, shall we return to Kahna Castle?

Outta here.



Yep. Here we are, lined up just like old times.

BRIEFS: What has happened to Matelite...?

Taicho: Sir Matelite's whereabaouts are unknown! That is fine! He will not be here for this important occasion, the night of the revival of Kahna... Leave him be!

BRIEFS: ...... Where are you, Matelite...

Yeah, you jerk. Why d'you have to stand us up like that?

BRIEFS: PANTS... Sendak... Please listen, everyone. Right now, right here... Before our beloved Kahna Castle... I declare the revival of Kahna. Yes... I... shall become the queen of Kahna. But... I... I don't think I'm yet suited for the throne. I've been thinking about a lot today... About us from now on... About Kahna's revival force... No... about Orelus's freedom force. I discussed it with General Palpaleos, who has come from the Granbelos Empire... And then I decided. We must continue the battle. We've revived Kahna, and liberated many lagoons from the rule of the Granbelos Empire. But... it isn't over yet. True peace... This is something won through fighting... An era we can call a true peace inthe world of Orelus... in these skies... Until that time comes, all we can do is fight. Isn't that right... Sir Taicho, captain of the knights of Mahal.

Taicho: Indeed it is! I wish Matelite could also have heard that!

BRIEFS: I'm sure Matelite thinks the same way. Will you be alright... Sendak? The Holy Dragons are our allies. Even if it's painful, do you think you can continue the fight?

Sendak: I... I am a strong old geezer...!! I will not ramble on any longer... I think, anyway...

BRIEFS: Listen...... Rush, Truce... ...everyone. Will you fight with me?

Rush: I will!

Truce: BRIEFS! Let's fight together!

BRIEFS: Pants... you too.

Let's fight... for a new era!

BRIEFS: Pants... You've cheered me up so many times... From now on... please lead us to victory.



BRIEFS: I still haven't properly introduced him to everyone... This is General Palpaleos... He left the Empire and Sauzer to become a new member of our group... Emperor Sauzer read the mind of a Holy Dragon and fell seriously ill...Then he let General Palpaleos go. It was all to protect the skies of Orelus. To protect them from the beast of the other world...

Palpaleos: General Gudolf has taken authority over the Empire... If it's to win... No, if it's to rule the people by force, he will use any means necessary... We must change the flow of the era that has begun to take shape... If we do it now we'll make it in time!

BRIEFS: I hereby declare the revival of Kahna!! And... the beginning of a new battle!

Woo!



Boo!

Manyo: Manyooo! (We've received payment!)

Munyo: Munyooo! (We can't tell you who paid!)

Matelite.

Melodia: Melomelo! (The Mini-Devil's friend is tired...)

Monyo: Monyomonyo!! (Deluxe edition of the Mini-Devil Dance!)

Manyo: Manyomanyo!! (Devil Dance begin!!)

Munyo: Munyomunyomunyo!! (Let's keep dancing tonight!!!)

Melodia: Melomelo!! (It looks like the Mini-Devils are happy with lots of tips!!)

BRIEFS: Tonight is the night of Kahna's revival!! Let's all have fun!! Hey... PANTS. What are you going to do tonight?

PANTS: >I'm gonna be free and easy!

BRIEFS: I see... Let's dance 'til we drop, all night long!!



And the party begins! ...Wait, is that...?



Matelite!?

Matelite: If it will make BRIEFS happy... I'll dance in the sky too! I can make even flowers bloom in the night sky!! But, it still wouldn't be enough... BRIEFS... If only I were stronger... ...... Never mind. Watch my Matelite-brand fireworks!! Everyone! Thank you!



Ooh!



Ahh!

Taicho: She was indeed... She has grown strong...

Matelite: BRIEFS... Was she beautiful...?

Taicho: She was indeed... Sir Matelite's dress... looked very well on her...

Matelite: BRIEFS... Did she seem happy...?

Taicho: She appeared to be sad that you were not present...

Matelite: ...... BRIEFS...

Taicho: Come now...

And with that...



Next time: The Orelus Freedom Force sails once more in The Sky of Sadness.

May I suggest Accident as this young one's name? Or CoinToss? Lucky?

My, my, aren't we bitter?

=(

Oh, and I suggest we name the baby Elvis, since it's a hunka hunka burning love.

You guys are right, I should apologize. Rather than focus on the dragon-child's heritage, we should just be grateful for the miraculous being that is about to enter our videogame world.

At the moment, I'm leaning towards [Lucky] at the moment, so barring any amazing last-minute suggestions I think we'll be going with [Lucky] the baby dragon for our pick.

Expect an update either tonight or tomorrow and hopefully we'll get this LP rolling again to the finish.

Welcome back. In our last battle, we had fended off all of the remaining Granbelos generals and reclaimed Kahna in the name of the Resistance. After the coronation of Queen BRIEFS and the proclemation of a new goal for the group, the Resistance army partied long and hard into the night.

The next day...



Woof woof woof



Looks like PANTS and company hit the alcohol a little too hard, opting to spend the night outside on the grounds instead of back in the barracks.

Kid: Get outta here! This spot is ours!



Truce: We're gonna end the war so that day never comes...

[Rush turns to the kids.]

Rush: Do you wanna be strong?

Kid: We wanna grow up and be soldiers in Kahna's Dragon Squad! We wanna ride the dragons all around Orelus's sky someday! To help make it come true.... I named this dog after a dragon in the Dragon Squad! Isn't that right, VicViper!!

"What? That's impossible! There must be some mistake..."

Rush: Our castle, it was taken over at some point. The only things that haven't changed are the wind, the clouds, and the land in front of the castle gates... Maybe we shouldn't be coming back now, you know...

Truce: But the fighting is still gonna keep going, huh. We need to get back to Papillon... Speaking of which... It seems Bikkebakke hasn't come back. I'm worried. Do you think he hates fighting now?

You're right, he's been noticably absent from this conversation this whole time. I wonder where he went off to...



Ah, there he is.

Bikkebakke: PANTS... I... I can't do it... The real estate man.. He just laughed at me... "You know... Do you really think you can make money off of mushrooms? This ain't no dream world!" He's right... What was I thinking... And then... when Palpaleos joined, we had one too many knights... I, I... PANTS... I keep thinking somebody will say to me, "We won't need you."

Pshaw, where'd you get that idea? It's the Lancers and Mini-Devils we don't need at this point, remember?

Rush: Where were you?! We've been looking for you this whole time!

Truce: What would we do without you, Bikkebakke...? Okay, let's all return together to Papillon!!

Bikkebakke: Everyone...

Awwwwww. Group hug, everyone-



Gah! Matelite, don't jump in so s-



Gah!!

Dragonkeeper: It's terrible! The Empire's floating fortress is headed for Papillon!!

Matelite: Okay!! Hurry! We're gonna fight the Granbelos Empire!

To the Papillon!



Join us now as we fight once more in...





Rush has a good memory - we went through this exact same formation way back in Chapter 2, I believe. It's amazing how far we've come, isn't it?



Taicho, number 3? But then, who's... nah, it couldn't be...



!!!!



Mmm, shame it has to go on, but whaddaya gonna do.



Gunso: Yesterday we all had to lift Matelite up... *scratch* Ouch...

Matelite got a little tipsy last night, eh? Heh, I knew he couldn't hold his liquor.

Diana: Just because Matelite asks, that suddenly makes it okay... That's low.

The fireworks were really magic? Man, for a second I actually thought Matelite had talent for fireworks and explosives.



Yep.



Who has dragon drool on their... oh. Oh.



Man, is this still going on? You'd think they'd have made up by now, but nope - still fighting.



Frederica: Everybody changes... Their hearts... their bodies... They all decay...

How... very morbid of you, Frederica. I'll just be over here by Bikkebakke...



(The cover of the book says, "The Theory of Economics.")

Hrm, better not disturb him, then.



Truce: Emperor Sauzer must not have allowed its use in the previous battles...

Didn't stop him from unleashing Persona's flying mollusk monster thing back in chapter 12.



Trying to enter Sendak's room greets us with a message from Zora, forbidding our entrace. Whelp, time to explore the rest of the ship then.



Crewmember: Me and twelve others... "Let's just be friends... I will have good memories of you." Is what she says... All the others are in here doing cleaning. Sort of like, "Welcome, newlyweds!" Heheh...

Christ, what the hell's wrong with everyone today? Everyone's acting all creepy and stuff.



Might as well stock up on some of those books of his. We didn't really need them until now (nor could we afford them), but those Porno Mags will be instrumental for raising our dragon's strength stat, as well as unlocking their final forms. More on that later...



Stay the fuck away from my dragons, Monyo. I swear to God, I will end you if something happens to any of them.



Hate you all so much.

Wagahai: No, no, I'm glad I'm being kicked.

Even Wagahai's having a time reigning the devils in. Somebody push them out of the ship, please?



Meanwhile, Saijin's still waiting for his opportunity to strike while Zeroshin is working on his sociability in his letters to his mother...



Eeeeeeeeeeee!



Wait, Father? Huh, so that's what he meant.

Dragonkeeper: The first person a dragon baby sees becomes its human father!! Of course, I had thought you would be the father, PANTS.... But since you're the second person, that makes you the mother...

PANTS/Hornet is my OTP.

......

Let's go see hello to the newborn!



AAAGH!

Dragonkeeper: Look!! He's not scary... Ouch...!! He bit me...!! Don't worry!! He's not scary... PANTS's nice...



With VicViper and Wh.MAGE calmed down, it's time we begin training our new dragon pup.

Dragonkeeper: Okay then. Be nice to it!!

By the way, we need a name, don't we?



It just feels right, y'know?



Lucky's starting stats are entirely dependant on his parents, taking on the highest stat in each area from his parents minus one point. As such, I don't really bother raising him, to be honest - his stats don't carry over into new files, and we only need six active dragons on our roster regardless. He's mostly there just for flavour - if you want to use him, go ahead, but the others are already doing well as it is.



He does make a good candidate for the Princess ???'s, however - since he's not going to be on the active team, we can turn him into a Behemoth / Black Dragon and pull him out whenever we want to take advantage of their unique abilities (or just want to see the joke summons). I'll leave the decision open for now, but I'll probably go in that direction if there's no consensus on the matter.



Hmm, it seems Lucky dropped a bit of dragon dung as well...



Curioser and curioser...



Oh. My. God.

Exploring the void brings us to Bahamut, the final Holy Dragon...

Bahamut: PANTS... I shall show you memories of the future...



Bahamut: PANTS... I shall take you through these skies...

This prophecy comes to pass after the game...

But! We've still got the main saga to get through, and that means dragon-feeding.



First order of business is to make use of those Porno Mags to boost our dragon's stats to ridonkulous levels (don't ask me how that works, I'm not sure either). Decent strength is always helpful to have for various reasons, so it is our next goal to raise.



The downside of Porno Mags are that they'll kill your dragon's Wisdom stat, so give them a few Difficult Books to study on the side.

Truffle ends up maxing out his strength stat, a milestone for our dragons at this point. More importantly, however...



...Is that it unlocks Truffle's second-last form, the special Holy Dragon form. This grants us to Holy-elemental spells for the first time, unlocking our fighters' and mage's strongest attacks in the game.

The means for unlocking a Holy/Dark form is fairly arcane, but easy enough once you figure it out. In order for it to be unlocked, you have to max out a dragon's Fire, Ice and Thunder stat, either their strength or vitality stat, and then finally have either Life (Holy) or Poison (Dark) maxed out (if Life and Poison are both maxed, then the final form is determined by Intimacy, with a higher stat leaning towards Holy). Once your dragons reach this form, you've pretty much beaten the game, however there's one more form after the Holy/Dark forms that's stronger than all of them combined...




The feeding montage continues, of course.





Wh.MAGE's Fire stat finally gets maxed out here, getting her caught up with the others.

Next to get maxed out is Calzone's Ice stat, making that the last elemental stat we'll have to raise.



With all the elemental stats maxed out, the rest of the dragon feeding goes towards strength-boosting items in the hopes that we get more Holy/Dark dragons...