It’s All Upstairs From Here…Let’s Overanalyze Final Fantasy Legend

Octo has
threatened to
make fun of
bad dialogue
caused in
part by
character
limitations.

fix'd


Young UUDD was delighted to play this back in the day because there were no RPGs on the Game Boy before this one came out (that I was aware of), but FFLII was such a massive step upwards in all aspects that I've never revisited it.

Sana’s log, day 12


We immediately set out westward to the bandit’s hideout. I suspect that Brda would have started knocking down trees if we delayed. It turned out to be moderately well-hidden and well-defended, occupying a system of caves in the mountainous region west of the southern rivers.


I’m not sure whether to be surprised or not that the bandits were a group of monstrous lizards.

Sana: Is it racist of me to note that the only lizards we’ve met are thieves, apparently led by an extortionist rapist?

Xavr: It would be speciesist at best; humans and monsters can’t interbreed.

Krby: Also, they probably all transformed into lizards after they joined. It’s like wearing gang colors. So it’s not that lizards are evil by nature, it’s that those who are evil by nature have chosen to become lizards.

Sana: I think that actually makes me feel better.


The caves were huge; it seemed like the bandits were housing an entire battalion in here. We avoided as many of them as we could. At one point we dodged through a door to find a completely empty room. At first I guessed it would be full of monsters and we’d be ambushed at every step, but that wasn’t the case—it was just empty. In retrospect, it would be kind of random and bizarre to have a “monster trap room” in your fortified hideout.


There was also a locked door that we guessed was some sort of storehouse.


The bandit leader had his own room, separate from the rest of his men. He was not happy to see us.


Brda: No way? There are many ways! You swine! You cur! You are a useless beast who is unworthy to lie on the ground we walk on! You are lower than swamp slime! If one were to dig a hole at the deepest part of the ocean and fill it with the shit of the creatures of the deep, it would still be a more worthy endeavor than your existence. Not to mention, it would smell better! If you are so fond of violence against women, I invite you to try it now!


The bandit leader turned out to be a more powerful breed of lizard than his men, with some sort of poisonous skin. This didn’t stop Brda from crushing him into a fine paste that even Krby didn’t want to eat.


Xavr: Don’t gloat, Krby. It’s unbecoming.


When we announced the death of their leader, the remaining bandits scattered and the caves were abandoned.


We rechecked that storehouse on a whim and were able to force the door.


The equipment within would have been of little use to a group of monsters—it was probably stolen. If we couldn’t find the original owner, we’d at least put it to good use.

Sana’s log, day 13


On our return to South Town, we relayed the good news.


The woman was so overjoyed that the bandit was gone that she took off for Castle Armor straight away. She was already embracing the king when we arrived.




Shockingly, King Armor was true to his word, and handed over his armor with barely a thought.


The armor itself was amazing: Light, comfortable, easily adjustable, twice as strong as my existing armor and apparently fireproof. A girl could get used to this.

Sana: So, Xavr, you’d mentioned the artifacts were critical to these warlords staying in power. Did King Armorless just do something supremely stupid?

Xavr: Well, it did seem that his soldiers were more level-headed and selflessly loyal than King Shield’s men, so I doubt they’ll desert immediately. But we’re going to want to move quickly before the balance of power in this region is significantly changed and chaos ensues.

Sana’s log, days 14 - 16


With that in mind, we proceeded to hike the western mountain path than lead to the central southern area of the island. In a well-entrenched fertile valley was the castle of King Sword.


We were set upon by his soldiers before we’d even made it to the entrance. This did not bode well.

Sana: We’re not getting out of this one peacefully, are we?

Brda: You are too cautious! Relish the glory of battle!

Krby: And put relish on the spoils of battle!


The castle was a fortress, huge and well-defended.


The guards turned out to be lycanthropes—they transformed into wererats when we approached! Xavr’s ability to create fire with his mind turned out to be a lifesaver multiple times.


The top floor of the castle housed his elite troops—martial artists who would kick our heads off given half the chance. We booked it back downstairs and took an alternate route to the throne room.


Krby: Your majesty, we implore you: End these senseless hostilities! Free the people of this island from tyranny! Love your brothers like they’re your actual brothers! Put down your sword!


Sana: …yeah, I called that one.


The King’s sword was relatively ineffectively against the armor I was wearing, so I jumped in front and took hits when the rest of the party whittled him down.


We claimed his sword from his corpse. I took no pleasure in it.


Sana: Yes, Xavr, we know. We killed him. No need to harp on it.

Sana’s log, day 17

Our best plan of action, with one king lovesick and powerless, and another dead with his forces in disarray, was to appeal to the rational side of King Shield. Surely, as we were now armed with two of the artifacts, he’d think better than to challenge us?


The guards hadn’t gotten much smarter since our last visit.



But apparently the king’s steward had! We arrived just after the king had succumbed to the poison the steward had been feeding him, and apparently just in time for him to call the guards and blame us for the crime.


When we dispatched them with ease—the King Sword was truly a masterful weapon—the steward fled through a hidden passage.


We pursued him and caught up easily, and he dropped to his knees when he saw us, begging for his life.


Brda: You are a worm. A bottom-feeder who uses coward’s tactics. After murdering your liege and attempting to falsely set this fiefdom against us, you seek mercy? You’ll have none from me. Die on your feet, whelp!


He did.



We claimed the shield.


Xavr: It’s a pity, really.

Sana: I hadn’t expected this to become so bloody. Certainly not so fast. Will this island survive, now?

Xavr: Certainly. King Armor is the only remaining leader. By the time we emerge from the Tower, he’ll likely be the undisputed ruler of this island. I wouldn’t want to be here in the interim, though—I’d expect power-hungry men to emerge from the remnants of the leaderless two armies, and the violence could be dramatic.

I took off the armor and the sword. It was just as well we had plans to dispose of them. I found it hard to hold them without thinking of the lives that had and would be lost to acquire them.

Sana’s log, day 18


We returned to the town of Hero, and to the incomplete statue.


I snapped the armor, shield and sword into their places, and they melded into the stone as if they’d always belonged there. Good, they wouldn’t be easily removed and used again.


A black sphere materialized in front of the statue as the last piece froze in place.


I briefly wondered again who the “hero” was. How many people died for his heroics?


There was a crash as we walked away, and a giant black dragon-turtle landed in front of the statue.


Sana: Wait, “another”? This has happened before? But that makes no sense. When? Who? Why didn’t anyone tell me about this?


But Gen-Bu wasn’t in the mood for clarification. He attacked us with insane savagery I’d never seen before, even in the feral monsters outside. He was relentless—there was no chance to attempt reasoning with him as we desperately fought him off.


Before his body disappeared in a swirl of energy, he left us with a threat.

Sana: What the hell was that about? What was that creature?

Krby: I could have told you if I had a chance to taste it.

Xavr: Apparently that thing, whatever it was, had some sort of agenda in keeping people out of the Tower. I could speculate as to reasons now, but I suspect that we’re better off searching the Tower for further information first.

Sana: I suppose. Because this really doesn’t add up—this door has been locked before and someone else has claimed the sphere from the statue? Why would Gen-Bu hide it the same way twice? And why wouldn’t anyone know if this was a repeating cycle?

Xavr: I cannot say.

Sana’s log, day 19


Has it really been less than three weeks since I arrived on these shores? It felt like I’d been through so much already, for what seemed like only the prologue to a larger adventure. Tonight, we’ll spend our last night in Base Tower Town’s cramped inn, and tomorrow we’ll break Gen-Bu’s seal on the Tower and see which, if any, of the legends about it are true.

FFL Mechanics Update – The Base World

So, for those of you who were having trouble following—though I’m not certain there were any, I just like talking—let’s take a look at what was actually going on in the Base World.


This is Nintendo Power’s map of the Base World, which is basically the map that came with the game annotated with place names.

Though it seems pretty open (and indeed it is, you can go pretty much anywhere straight off), there’s a definite sequence of events you’re supposed to be following. Later worlds lock you into the sequence much more securely, but there isn’t much deviation here in any case.

You’re expected to do the events in the order Sana did. You don’t actually have to visit Castle Armor or South town before killing the bandit, though—the king will still hand over the armor even if you have no idea why. You can also kill King Sword before doing any of that, though the difficulty of monsters in the two areas implies that you should go in the standard order. The Steward won’t kill King Shield until you have the other two items, so you’ll always get it last.

Though there are a few things in Base World that can kill you if you’re unprepared, it’s mostly meant to be a “training wheels” part of the game. The first few bosses are pretty beatable, the quest chains are easy to follow, and the game hands you a suit of great armor and an infinite-use strong weapon to use for grinding if you can’t get past Gen-Bu.

The “Adventurer’s log” in the manual will also hand-hold you through this world and the beginning of the next, just to make sure you get the knack of things.

(Young Beowulf needed that, as he didn’t understand efficient grinding or min-maxing, and didn’t know certain tricks which break the system. I’ll note the point where I gave up in my youth.)

There was a semi-useful trick I learned from some Nintendo Power Tip: If you carry multiples of weapons that get stronger as their supply diminishes (e.g. PUNCH), the bonuses carry over.

Did you do any monster stuff yet?

Yep. I'm in the process of setting up a whole post of what I did with Krby and why.

Yeah... Quit being a preachy dick, Xavr.

We get it, man! Just give it a rest...

FFL Mechanics Update – Mutant Growth

Mutants are actually the easiest race to build up and use, and if the game was properly programmed, they’d be the most powerful. (More on that later.) Though you have more control over the development of humans, mutants actually have more flexibility in terms of differentiated battle options.


I spent about three hours grinding in the Base World, which earned me enough money to get my two humans just about up to snuff for the second segment of the game, and put Xavr up to late-game stat levels. Note the increase in Defense here, despite not changing Xavr’s inventory: Mutants gain “natural” defense, which compensates for having fewer slots to equip items in. It’s generally believed that using certain weapons results in higher gains for the related stats, and taking damage increases your Defense.

Stench reduces enemy strength. Barrier increases defense in battle. Stealth apparently increases the chances of getting a preemptive attack, though I didn’t notice much effect. Mirror creates “duplicates” which decrease the enemy’s ability to hit you. ESP is rumored to increase evasion for the round it’s used (like a shield), but nobody knows for sure and it’s generally considered to be a waste of a turn. Honestly, none of these powers is particularly useful, because this is the sort of game where the best defense is to kill things before they attack you.




Flame is one of the abilities you really want: It causes fire damage to a group of enemies, dependent on mana. Note that Xavr’s mana skyrockets over the course of these shots, even though I’m not really using abilities until I get Flame. Mana plays a role in both magic attack and magic defense, and humans can’t increase it at all, so this is where mutants really shine. (Also, you’ll notice I’m using the Hammer, a strength-based weapon, for this entire world, and Strength and Agility increase at about the same rate. I think mutants are generally skewed towards agility growth, but I have nothing but anecdata to back that up.)
Kinesis causes paralysis to one enemy group. It’s okay, as far as powers go, because it’s moderately reliable.


Ice works just like Flame, but with a different element. When you get a cool ability, you generally should use it—it could be gone as quickly as it appeared. Abilities also sometimes spontaneously recharge or even double in uses (I had ESP jump to 50 uses at one point, then go back to 25 at the Inn; I also had Ice drop to 0 and Flame jump to 15 after one battle.)

Telepor allows you to return to any floor of the Tower you’ve previously visited…which makes it useless in this world. Electro reduces enemy agility, similar to Stench.

xFire is a vulnerability to fire, just like what you’ll find on monsters. These are annoying when they appear because there’s nothing you can do to get rid of them but hope. I had this disappear and reappear twice.


The game doesn’t inform you of mutant growth, which is probably the most annoying aspect of it. You just notice your powers have changed in the next battle, or suddenly realize your attacks are doing more damage. Final Fantasy Legend 2 refined this system by always replacing the bottom power and letting you rearrange them (which made your mutant’s power level over the course of a dungeon much more predictable), but it also slowed down growth rates and made them significantly more random.

(Also, unlike Final Fantasy 2’s system, stats never decrease. Using certain weapons may or may not slow down your growth rates, but you can never lose gains you’ve already made.)


Thunder is another direct-damage ability. By this point, I buy a spellbook for 500 GP so that I’ll always have group-damage available, even if Xavr’s powers don’t comply. With Xavr’s mana approaching 99, his spells will instant-kill everything we’ll meet for a while.

The best FAQ I’ve ever seen regarding mutant growth is this one by WonderLlama.

If you’re playing on an original Game Boy (or a similar system with a fixed randomizer seed), you can power up your Mutants by abusing the simple RNG—every time you hard-reset, you’ll face the same set of encounters and receive the same bonuses. Go to an area where these are the gains you want, and you can grind your mutant in a custom way without risking losing your powers.


For reference, this is a side-by-side of my party after all of my base world grinding, right after getting Krby into Salamand form (which I’ll discuss in the next post). Xavr is basically on par with Krby, and all I had to do was fight a lot.


In the short form: Humans have very few abilities (until the late game) that hit an entire enemy group or every enemy on the field. Mutants can get that for free, and even if they don’t, a relatively modest investment (500 GP—less than two STRONG potions) will get you a spellbook that will do the same. Since mutants can get maxed-out ability scores very early one with relatively little investment (in the early game, it’s much easier than maxing a human character), the manual is really lying to you here: A four-mutant party can beat the game just fine.

The guy I borrowed the cartridge from had beaten the game with a lone female mutant, so it's possible, but highly difficult.

FFL Mechanics Update – Monster Transformations

If you’ve played a game in this series before, you’ll know that monsters’ transformations from eating meat are not as simple and straightforward as one might hope. It’s not just a matter of eating meat from stronger monsters or even of the chart Nintendo Power provided us in my youth.



(The monster groups key is incomplete, just in case you couldn’t guess. That’s an error in my scanning, not the original publication.)

A fellow called s/p on Gamefaqs put together a proper chart that sorts the monsters into their actual appropriate levels, and figured out the trick to the system.

Every monster has a level and a group. Using the chart, you can figure out what group your new monster will be, given the group of the current monster and the meat. (Nintendo Power got this right.) The level is the trick: Take the higher of your current level or the meat’s level. If there’s a monster of that level in the new group, that’s what you become. If not, the game will first check one level higher, then it will start checking lower levels until it finds something.
Which means that you can “gain” monster levels by strategically eating meat, so long as the target group you’re aiming for has a monster one level above you and nothing on your level.

Which means you can get almost-top level monsters before setting foot in the Tower. (The final level of monsters can only be gotten from the mini-bosses in the final dungeon, just like in FFL2. That’ll be a ways from now.)

This FAQ also recounts the standardized optimal path for getting there. (I’ve seen this same path in two unrelated FAQs and in the archived Let’s Play of this game.) I think there’s a slightly shorter one, but that one requires Clipper meat.

Clippers and Karateka are the rare encounters of the Base World, only findable in the Bandit’s treasure room (rare) and the third floor of Castle Sword (uncommon). Clippers aren’t actually that dangerous, but unless you’ve got solid armor and take them out quickly with magic, Karateka will murder you. Hunting for Clipper meat is irritating in a mixed party and outright dangerous in a four-monster party.

To take this path, get your monster into Goblin form (which is a starting option); if you are crazy enough to make a monster your main character, start as a Wererat.


Zombie meat turns you into an o-bake. (Zombies are random encounters pretty much everywhere in base world, which makes it easy to do these sterps.)


Albatross meat turns you into an oni. Albatross can be found on the world map, or in the bandit’s treasure room if you’re having trouble finding one.


More zombie meat turns you into a phantom.

I then missed the screenshots, but goblin meat is necessary to turn you into a gecko. This is actually a level above the P-Frog bandit. Goblins are common in both the fields and forests of the world map.


More zombie meat turns you into a red bone.


Redbull meat turns you into a hornet. These are occasionally annoying to find—I actually spent a chunk of time searching for one, because they’re a rare encounter on the world map and uncommon in the first floor of King Sword’s castle.


Lizard meat turns you into a catwoman. Lizards are common on the world map, and also automatic encounters in the bandit’s cave if you haven’t beaten the bandit yet.


Skeleton meat turns you into an eagle. Skeletons are most common outside Castle Sword.

Wererat meat turns you into a mosquito. Wererats are the pegged guard encounters in Castle Sword.


Albatross meat turns you into a beetle.


More zombie meat turns you into an ogre.


Yet more zombie meat turns you into a buruburu.


Wererat meat turns you into a behemoth.


Skeleton meat turns you into a giant.


Lizard meat turns you into a warrior. This is a very important form in the sequence for two reasons: One, it’s the last time you have the chance to go back and become a lower-level monster, and two, it has the SAW ability, which is the only way an all-monster party can beat the game.


But we move on. The final snack is goblin meat, to become a salamand. From this point on, every group has a monster at this level, so any meat we eat will result in (approximately) the same power level.

Krby is set for quite some time.

So what you're telling us is that...

Redbull gives you wings?

I always was random about how I ate meats, and as a result I always went backwards.

I remember one time the Bandit (P-Frog) dropped meat, and I turned into him!

Sana’s log, day 20

Our preparations seemed as complete as they were going to be. We had fresh weapons and Xavr had a spellbook that allowed him to throw a gout of flame reliably. His resilience to harm had also grown in leaps and bounds, though it still paled in comparison to Krby, who had gone through a series of transformations during our battles and seemed to have settled in the form of a fire-breathing giant lizard he called a “Salamand”. It was impressively intimidating, until he opened his mouth and his usual squeaky voice emerged. Also, his breath smelled perpetually of bacon.


We held the Black Sphere up to the seal on the Tower door, and the seal dissolved, allowing us to finally enter.


As I probably should have anticipated, the interior was a giant staircase leading up. The stairs seemed to go up for miles, up like a mountainside.

We hadn’t made it halfway up the stairs, of course, when a monster came bounding down it towards us.


Krby: Wolf!

Xavr: While I’ll admit that you are more knowledgeable to the taxonomy of your species than I, I’m fairly certain that’s a large cat of some sort, not a wolf.

Krby: Hey, I didn’t make it up. That’s just what they’re called. Even the original Japanese called them that.

Xavr: …the what?

Krby: Slime!




It was clear that the creatures into the Tower had grown more savage in the time the door had been sealed. In addition to the new creatures, we encountered stronger versions of the Goblins from outside.


When we’d reached the top of the stairs, a door led us to what we dubbed the “Second Floor”, which had wide corridors full of monsters, but little else. The side paths were dead ends.


At the far end of the floor, we found a door leading to another landing and an identical giant staircase.

Sana’s log, day 21


At the top of that, on the so-called Third Floor, we found a strange door that didn’t lead further upstairs.


In fact, the door led outside the Tower, into what appeared to be an idyllic tropical vista. With a spring of clean, fresh water running in a valley between mountains and palm trees everywhere, it seemed a pleasant contrast to the bloody battles we’d faced. Was this the legendary paradise? Had we reached the top so soon?

Sana: How can this be here, outside the Tower? The river, the mountains…even if it were a floating island of some sort, why wouldn’t we see it when we looked up the Tower from the base?

Brda: I am puzzled as well. For that matter, surely we’ve climbed high enough to have reached the top of the Tower as we could see it from the outside? Look! It looks just as tall here as it did before we entered!

Xavr: Perhaps the Tower is extradimensional in nature? We are not just traveling a distance in the physical world, but through portals to other planes entirely?


A small village was across the river, which we easily waded through.


If you could call it a village, I suppose. There were no houses or other shelters. There was no industry or commerce either. Apparently the villagers few villagers just lounged about all day, naked as the day they were born, eating coconuts and occasionally having sex when they worked up the energy.


Sana: Wouldn’t you get sick of just eating coconuts? Not to mention malnourished?

Xavr: I suppose, if this is a divinely-created paradise, the coconuts would contain all the vital nutrients humans need. Similarly, it appears that these trees are constantly in season and produce far more fruit than one would expect, and the river appears to stay fresh and pure despite there not being a logical place for it to flow from.

Krby: And there’s a lot you can do with coconuts! Coconut salad…turrine of coconut…coconut soup…prime coconut roast...

Brda: Oh, I HATE coconuts! I can't stand coconuts!

Sana: I suspect that answers the question of whether this is a universal paradise.


The people who had chosen to stay here apparently believed otherwise. They claimed to all have been here for years, having once challenged the Tower. They believed there was no further to climb, and that the Creator was rewarding their bravery right here.


We felt otherwise. This was too simple, too easy, and too…stereotypical? We returned to the Tower, and sure enough, found another staircase to climb higher.

Sana’s log, day 22


On the Fourth Floor, we found another door that lead outside the Tower, into another field ringed by mountains. However, this scene could not have been a greater contrast to the pseudo-paradise below: A shattered, rocky landscape with jagged edges that cut our feet.


Demons roamed the area, torturing the people and attacking us if we ventured too close. Though we could drive them back, their numbers seemed endless. We had neither the numbers nor the strength to liberate these people.


Not that they would choose to be liberated. These people also claimed to be adventurers who scaled the Tower searching for paradise. They rejected the fields below as too easy, and instead came here, believing that sinners could not enter a true paradise, and they would need to be cleansed by this place before they could ascend.


Some had given up hope. I turned away when Brda offered them mercy.


But one told us a curious thing: Apparently this world—the Tower, and everything contained and connected by it—was controlled by four fiends. He claimed they were seeking to control who could access the Tower and when, and to rule each world within it. That sounded suspiciously like Gen-Bu’s motivation. Did that mean there were three others like him? And if so, would they seek vengeance against us, or be happy we eliminated their competition?

Then I remembered Gen-Bu’s claims that this wasn’t over and feared it would be the former case.


Concerned but resolved, we again returned to the Tower. We discovered a magical fountain which healed our wounds, though it didn’t recover Xavr or Krby’s abilities. We’d need to properly rest—apparently on something more comfortable than a stone floor or a pile of palm fronds—for that.

Sana’s log, day 23


On the landing of the next grand staircase, we found a gun that someone had left behind. I carried it briefly but eventually discarded it unused. Bullets were only moderately effective against feral monsters, and after the events with the three kings, I couldn’t imagine pointing it at another person.


The Fifth Floor opened to a large, sandy antechamber with a massive central door.


It had a sigil over it, similar to the one on the first floor entrance to the Tower…which was also locked with a magical seal. Our Black Sphere could do nothing to budge it.


My silk-hatted friend had somehow beaten us here. He explained that he had been exploring Demon Tower Island when he got word that we’d defeated Gen-Bu and were planning to open the Tower. He must have entered just after we did and passed us while we investigated the false heaven and hell. There was apparently a town nearby, where he’d been gathering information about the seal on the Tower door. Apparently the “dragon brothers” had been somehow involved in sealing it, and there was an old wise man who might know something useful. I thanked him for the help and offered him the chance to come along with us, but he declined. He wanted to descend the tower and explore the strange miniature worlds he’d missed. We agreed to meet again, further up the Tower, if fortune allowed.


Outside of the Tower was a tropical island, dotting with great rocky outcroppings and palm trees. We could see a town far in the distance.

Tomorrow, we would start to uncover the secrets of this world.

If Krby can't degenerate to a lower level at this point, you should have him consume meat with reckless abandon.

Yeah, I'd also like this.

I've been playing ahead to try to make sure my story and my screenshots are consistent, but when my posts catch up to where I've played to at this point, I'll do my best to have Krby get crazy with the monster chow.

Sana’s log, day 24


As my silk-hatted friend had said, there was a port town on the far end of the island where the Tower stood.

Sana: How long has this town been here? Could this place have been entirely populated by the descendants of adventurers who tried to climb the tower, but chose to stop here? That defies believability.

Xavr: If my theory that we’ve traveled between dimensions is accurate, this could be another whole world like our own. The Tower could be the central point that connects a network of worlds, each an entire planet.

Sana: Well, that would be trouble for us if it were the case. We could be here for a very long time looking for another Sphere to unlock the Tower.

Krby: It’ll take us no time at all! We’re detectives!


We asked around the town for useful information. While no one had anything to say about the Tower—they had no local legends about it; apparently it was just another old ruin to them—they were able to tell us where the brothers we’d heard about were living.


Or, at least, had been living. Apparently they’d had a falling out.


Unfortunately, our attempts to charter a ship to investigate further were fruitless. The town had recently seen a surge in pirate problems. Many ships were sunk, and the rest refused to travel any distance from town. Trade had stagnated and leisure travel was out of the question.


When we asked around for alternate plans, we met this nutjob. Yes, thanks, that’s very helpful, we’ll be sure to keep it in mind.


Sana: Well, there’s a possibility. Do you think we might be able to use these tunnels to get close to the northeast town?

Townsperson: No one has a useful map of them because they’re also very dangerous, and too narrow to ship goods through in any case.

Brda: Then we shall be the first to conquer them.


We stopped to upgrade our equipment before setting out. Brda and I bought enchanted golden helmets. We also noted that stronger version of the health-enhancing potions were available for sale. This was important, as the previous type had lost their effectiveness on us.

Sana’s log, days 25 - 27


Directly north of the port town, we found an entrance to the undersea cave network.


Turns out the local pirates had also realized that people would be looking for an alternate mode of transportation, and roving bands of them infested the tunnels. How could a small island chain with only a few towns support this many pirates?


In several places, the caves dead-ended on small, uninhabited islands.


In others, we encountered nests of giant, floating eyeballs.


There turned out to be several cave networks that didn’t intersect, but everything looked alike and there were few landmarks. Xavr had to redraw his maps several times.


On our third day of exploration, Xavr noticed something odd about one of the rocky shoals. On a whim, we climbed out to inspect it.


Sana: It…MOVES!?

Brda: It’s alive!

Xavr: It’s a giant turtle!

Krby: We should call it Larry!

Sana: What!?

Krby: Larry the island turtle!

Brda: It’s rocking. I think it likes the name.

Xavr: It seems at least moderately intelligent. I suspect we can direct it to the islands we haven’t been able to reach through the tunnels.

Sana: You’re all okay with this? Giant turtle! Floating island giant turtle!

Xavr: I think perhaps you should sit down.

Krby: You seem stressed.


I had a little lie-down around that point. By the time I came to, we had sailed the island all the way to the port town. Apparently the turtle was remarkably obedient and willing to take us anywhere we wanted to go.

My life grows more surreal with each passing day.

Sana’s log, day 28


We sailed our floating turtle island…ahem, “Larry”, to the northeast town we had been told was the home of the brothers. We soon discovered we had been misinformed.



Though the dragon brothers weren’t here, we were able to fill in the gaps in our knowledge about them. Sei-Ryu was the younger brother, and being jealous of his brother Ryu-O, he banished him from their undersea palace and took the title of king for himself. Seemed like a nice guy. No-one knew where Ryu-O had gone.

Sana: So, do we think Sei-Ryu might be the second of these “four fiends”? Dragon kings seem like the type who might hoard spheres and lock towers.

Brda: It’s the best lead we have. I say we follow it.

Krby: If you give me a few days, I could probably turn myself into a dragon king. Then I’d outrank him and I’d have all the treasure!

Sana: …you know what? No. Just no.


We asked about the old man, and were told that there was a hermit living on the southern islands. Apparently the villagers were scared of him, but really, what was he going to do? Tell us to get off his lawn?



We also heard several rumors about how one might reach this palace under the sea. Apparently there was a whirlpool that would pull you down into a tidal eddy, and some kind of “air seed” that would allow you to breathe down there.


This town had a dojo, specializing in martial arts training. We declined, but I made a note to revisit the idea later.

Sana’s log, days 29 - 30

On our way to find the hermit, we inspected some noteworthy geographic features.


Sana: Is that a waterfall? Is this ocean all on some sort of disk?

Xavr: That can’t be right. That would make this island chain barely the size of Demon Tower Island.

Brda: Does that matter?

Xavr: That’s tiny! And unsupportable, given the population we’ve seen. We haven’t seen evidence of significant aquaculture, and there isn’t enough land area to support even the two small towns we’ve visited. Who are they trading with, if not a larger world? Where are the pirates from, and how can they survive if no one travels? No, it’s nonsensical. We must be missing something.

Sana: I wonder…


We also ventured too close to the whirlpool, and discovered it was a most curious experience: Getting close dragged you down to the sea floor, where an artificial dock had been constructed, but moving just out of the funnel would bob you immediately back to the surface. Xavr quickly concluded that it was the product of elemental magic. Well, quickly after he finished coughing the salt water out of his lungs. We’d have to revisit this after finding a way to breathe underwater.


It turned out that the pirates living in the caves had been driven there by the much nastier ones who attacked us at sea. They mostly consisted of Magicians who used their spells to put us to sleep, and thick-skinned Werewolves that could endure blows that would snap a man like a twig.


Then we sailed to an island with a small hut and garden on it. This must be the old man’s dwelling.


The old man had an interesting design sense, having set up his home more like a hedge maze than a house.


He was grumpy and taciturn, but divined our intentions in less than a minute: If we wanted to visit the undersea palace, we’d need the airseed. He gave us directions to the tree they grew on, and shooed us out without pomp or circumstance.


The directions were exactly right, though.

Sana’s log, day 31


Because doing crazy things were becoming commonplace in my life, we sailed Larry back into the whirlpool, and discovered that the airseed pumped out an air bubble big enough to encompass us when we reached the seafloor.


Larry couldn’t move away from the whirlpool without bobbing to the surface, so we disembarked on the man-made dock and set off along the seafloor.


In a bubble of air (that must have been generated by a grove’s worth of airseeds) was a town. Xavr was mollified by the presence of seaweed farms and fishing apparatus—even if it was on uncertain footing in terms of geography and physics, this town was apparently economically sound. There weren’t indications of trade or even contact with the above-water towns, though.


We focused our questioning on Sei-Ryu, Ryu-O and any other local legends. Ryu-O’s banishment apparently was up to dry land.


Krby: That sounds just like a blue sphere!

Sana: Except…not.


Sana: See, that sounds more like a blue sphere to me.

Brda: Except that it makes no sense Sei-Ryu would let him keep it when he was banished. The blue dragon probably hoards both orbs, now.


Sana: Ah, nonsensical local proverbs. Just what we need.

Xavr: It refers to the importance of friendship. Your life and your friends’ lives intersect for a very brief time, so you should always be mindful of where they cross.

We were also able to get directions through the undersea caves to the palace. A confrontation with Sei-Ryu was inevitable at this point.

Sana’s log, day 32

The entrance to the caves was south of town.


The distance was relatively short, but without directions, the trip would have been incredibly frustrating. The cave held dozens of small passages, all alike, but all but one of them ended in a dead end. Checking each corridor would enable dozens of surprise encounters with seafloor monsters, which we could hardly endure.


We also had a long walk along the seafloor to reach the palace. The dragon kings obviously valued their privacy.


It was immediately clear our presence was not welcome. Octopus guards swarmed us at every turn. They were unprepared for a blast of Xavr’s fire magic, though.


Giant shrimp and bloody-boned skeletons also were in Sei-Ryu’s employ.


A small storage closet on the first floor caught my eye, and sneaking into it paid off with a set of keys to the rest of the palace.

We dodged guards and made our way upstairs.


Who locks an empty closet?


As our presence became known, stronger guards were called out to confront us. The worst were plant creatures Krby called “Cactus” (which caused Xavr to gibber incoherently, as we were underwater), though they continued the trend of being unprepared for a moving air bubble full of fire magic.


On the third floor, we found a locked treasure room.


Sana: I saw a suit of this mail on sale on the islands. But I’m confused; why is silver armor more expensive and more powerfully enchanted than gold?

Xavr: Because this is mithril silver. Normal silver is soft and a poor choice for armor. This material is more rare and requires greater talent to forge.


The same room contained a Cure magic book that Xavr took for emergencies, and some explosives we threw at the cacti on the floor above.


The remainder of the third floor was a series of narrow walkways and guards we needed to either dodge or tear our way through.

The fourth floor was a series of three identical rooms.


Sana: What on earth? Dozens of red orbs!

Krby: We must need to merge them all into one!

Xavr: Or perhaps there’s only one real one among them.

Brda: Only one way to find out!


Xavr: Fascinating. The fake orbs hatch into monster crabs, then reform. That’s an interesting defense mechanism, to be sure.

Brda: Then we must kill atom crabs until the true orb is revealed!

Sana: Okay, wait, hold up. Silly thought: Remember that thing we heard in town about “lines crossing”? What if it wasn’t a proverb? What if it was actually a clue? I realize that makes no sense from a logical standpoint, but why else would the rooms be laid out like this?

Krby: Because Sei-Ryu loves reverse-psychology, so he told everyone in town how to find his treasure, figuring that they’d think he’d never tell them, so they’d never figure out where his treasure actually was!

Xavr: …It’s certainly worth a try.


Xavr: I’m astounded that worked.

Sana: You and me both.


Once again, while I would have loved the chance to question the dragon about the nature of the Tower and his role in sealing it, he appeared in a blind rage that we were stealing his orb and attacked without another word.


For a dragon king, he didn’t live up to the legends.


And then Krby took a big bite of Sei-Ryu’s remains, which transformed him into a humanoid made entirely of flames.


So now we had the red orb, but I was confident it wouldn’t actually unlock the Tower.


We resolved to return to the surface and see if the old man could offer us any other advice.

That is the best store.