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  #1  
Old 08-03-2017, 01:34 PM
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Default The 2017 Eclipse Will Collapse Civilization

I live in Oregon and my town is about an hour away from the path of totality. The town in the path normally has a population of 7000 people and the region is expected to get 100k+ tourists.

So what does this mean?
  • What is normally a 45 minute drive is expected to take 10 hours.
  • Stock up on food and water because stores will probably start running out on the 16th
  • Fill your gas tank, have a spare canister
  • Have cash, as ATMs will run out
  • Also have cash because credit cards might not work
  • Voice calls on cell phones probably won't work, texts will be delayed
  • Since cell phones likely won't work, have paper maps
  • The National Guard will be here
  • I have a friend in the County Sheriff's office and they are burying weapons caches in the path in case they need to respond to something and can't get there by car
  • Hospitals are not scheduling normal appointments, just acting as urgent/emergency care
  • No Netflix due to the lack of internet (this is literally on the county government's list!)

It's going to be pretty weird! Mainly the government is using it as a practice run for responding to refugees from the Cascadia Subduction quake if that ever happens.

Anyone else in or near the path? I know Nashville is supposed to get hit but they likely have the infrastructure for it.
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Old 08-03-2017, 02:10 PM
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I wish I could experience a total eclipse, but I live in an area that is completely out of the way.
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Old 08-03-2017, 04:44 PM
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I know someone who goes to college in a town on the path of totality. All their classes are "canceled" the day of the eclipse.
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Old 08-03-2017, 04:50 PM
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Say, I'm curious. If I point my phone in such a way that its selfie camera is pointed at the eclipse but I'm not facing it myself, could I see it safely through my phone screen?
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Old 08-03-2017, 05:07 PM
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Thanks for posting this, my parents are among said tourists and I forwarded this post to them as a warning, in case they thought this was going to be an easy jaunt north. My mom especially doesn't travel much and I don't want this to be a hellish experience for her.
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  #6  
Old 08-03-2017, 06:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aturtledoesbite View Post
Say, I'm curious. If I point my phone in such a way that its selfie camera is pointed at the eclipse but I'm not facing it myself, could I see it safely through my phone screen?
Yes, the screen only emits visible light (and some heat).
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  #7  
Old 08-03-2017, 06:33 PM
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Neat. I should probably watch out for the reflection, though?
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  #8  
Old 08-03-2017, 06:44 PM
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Oh god I'm in path save me from this unending hell I had no idea how many people were expected to come over this.
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  #9  
Old 08-03-2017, 06:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aturtledoesbite View Post
Say, I'm curious. If I point my phone in such a way that its selfie camera is pointed at the eclipse but I'm not facing it myself, could I see it safely through my phone screen?
Unless the camera optics can't take it?

Quote:
Originally Posted by taosterman View Post
Thanks for posting this, my parents are among said tourists and I forwarded this post to them as a warning, in case they thought this was going to be an easy jaunt north. My mom especially doesn't travel much and I don't want this to be a hellish experience for her.
I'd have her look up or call the local city/county government of the destination, almost all of them have a disaster response team for the eclipse at this point. Depending on where/when she's going it may be crowded but not crazy, our area simply doesn't have the infrastructure.
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Old 08-03-2017, 08:55 PM
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Looks like all of the eclipsing action is pretty far to the south of where I live so I guess it will be the same ol' same ol' for me.
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  #11  
Old 08-03-2017, 09:14 PM
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Originally Posted by Torzelbaum View Post
Looks like all of the eclipsing action is pretty far to the south of where I live so I guess it will be the same ol' same ol' for me.
You'll probably still see the partial eclipse, which is the one you absolutely definitely don't want to point your eyes at.

EDIT: Oh, geez, the path of totality hits Illinois. You'll definitely be able to see the partial eclipse.
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Old 08-03-2017, 09:25 PM
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If I am understanding the maps I am looking at it will hit the southernmost part of the state so I think the partial is all that will be visible here.
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  #13  
Old 08-04-2017, 05:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Violentvixen View Post
The town in the path normally has a population of 7000 people and the region is expected to get 100k+ tourists. ... Fill your gas tank, have a spare canister.
It just dawned on me that after electric cars become popular, events like this could cause brownouts. It could also be a quick buck for anyone with solar panels on their roof.
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  #14  
Old 08-04-2017, 07:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Violentvixen View Post
I'd have her look up or call the local city/county government of the destination, almost all of them have a disaster response team for the eclipse at this point. Depending on where/when she's going it may be crowded but not crazy, our area simply doesn't have the infrastructure.
They're flying, and staying at a hotel about an hour outside of Portland, so there might be traffic but not infrastructure issues. But my dad is going to carry cash and print paper tickets for all of their travel, just in case.

My wife's parents actually live just north of Asheville, NC, and their house is going to experience 98% totality, so we're just going to hang out with them (but drive down almost a week early).
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  #15  
Old 08-04-2017, 08:28 AM
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To see 100% totality I have to walk into my front yard. If I do that, I will be reminded that I need to mow said yard.

i'm sure there will be pictures on the internet later
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  #16  
Old 08-04-2017, 09:04 PM
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I looked this up and looks like I'll still be able to see a 90% eclipse where I am. I guess I should look into glasses or something.
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Old 08-04-2017, 09:35 PM
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I'm like way the fuck away from totality, but close enough to be like "Hey neato".

My office printed little signs with the date on them and stuck on on the stairway doors. The plan is to go out into the parking lot and be like "oooooh neat".
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  #18  
Old 08-04-2017, 10:02 PM
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I'm dependent on my sister for transport to the nearest good viewing site, and I'm trying to convince her to plan a bit more pessimistically, rather than just try to wing it.
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  #19  
Old 08-04-2017, 11:11 PM
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I lived in a small town right underneath the point of totality of the 1994 eclipse and nothing much happened. If there was any tourism it had to be in a nearby city.

At school we took turns looking directly at it for several seconds at a time through a book-sized cardboard box with a solar viewing visor taped into it, for eye protection. Made the whole thing look green.
The sky got about as dark as a heavy thunderstorm. We were also allowed to see it on TV during lunch.

Has the internet made these events so much bigger already that they ruin everything they touch?
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  #20  
Old 08-05-2017, 09:06 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dart Zaidyer View Post
I lived in a small town right underneath the point of totality of the 1994 eclipse and nothing much happened. If there was any tourism it had to be in a nearby city.

At school we took turns looking directly at it for several seconds at a time through a book-sized cardboard box with a solar viewing visor taped into it, for eye protection. Made the whole thing look green.
The sky got about as dark as a heavy thunderstorm. We were also allowed to see it on TV during lunch.

Has the internet made these events so much bigger already that they ruin everything they touch?
That wasn't a total one. I think the last total one was in the 70s?
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  #21  
Old 08-05-2017, 12:16 PM
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Columbia, MO, is basically right in the middle of the path of the totality. I work for the University of Missouri. Our first day of classes is the same day. We apparently couldn't move the start date for reasons that have to do with our accreditation, and we have thousands of people coming into Columbia see the eclipse on that day.

It's probably going to be hell for me on that day.
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  #22  
Old 08-11-2017, 04:41 PM
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I've been considering getting up early on the day of and driving as far as I can into South Carolina towards the path of totality. Still assessing exactly how bad an idea this is. If I decide to do it, I'll definitely take plenty of food and water with me, fill up on gas the day before, try to dig up a paper map, and probably stay off the freeways as much as possible as I expect they'll become useless quickly.
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  #23  
Old 08-14-2017, 08:59 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Violentvixen View Post
That wasn't a total one. I think the last total one was in the 70s?
Visible in the US, yeah.
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  #24  
Old 08-14-2017, 01:12 PM
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We'll be getting 88% coverage here in the capital of Arkansas. I know some people who are heading toward the car-pocalypse that'll be occurring north of here, but I think I'll be fine just stepping outside my office.
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  #25  
Old 08-19-2017, 05:29 PM
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My sister is a marvel and has secured a campsite along the path of totality.
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  #26  
Old 08-19-2017, 07:24 PM
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My work handed out eclipse glasses on Friday. Since we're in the path of totality I suspect that's basically them acknowledging nothing's going to be done for a while on Monday. I'll probably head up to the roof to watch.
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  #27  
Old 08-19-2017, 07:29 PM
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Of course a bunch of wildfires started up right before this so now there are evacuations and one of the major highways is shut down. We still seem to be out of the worst of the chaos, but had to try 5 places to get propane last week and three different gas stations.

At least they say the wildfire smoke should make it look pretty cool.
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  #28  
Old 08-19-2017, 08:10 PM
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I'm too afraid to get any eclipse glasses for fear of them not working and my eyes turning into sunny-side up eggs. I might go outside and pretend Dracula's Castle is getting sealed up, though.
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  #29  
Old 08-19-2017, 08:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by R.R. Bigman View Post
I'm too afraid to get any eclipse glasses for fear of them not working and my eyes turning into sunny-side up eggs. I might go outside and pretend Dracula's Castle is getting sealed up, though.
Counterfeiters don't bother to stamp the ISO and CE logos on their fakes, nor do they bother to make glasses that almost work. You can verify whether the ones you've got are the real deal because you can't see shit through them unless the sun itself is in your field of view.

At this point, however, it's probably too late. Anybody need resources on how to make a pinhole viewer?
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  #30  
Old 08-19-2017, 08:41 PM
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You can use your phone's camera to view it as well, I hear.
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