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Old 12-05-2018, 05:03 PM
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Default Digital Down-Low for 12/07/2018: Melee Kalikimaka

Howdy folks! The JINGLESMöRG started a few weeks earliar than usual this year, I blame global warming, so that means that this weeks update will be EXTRA BIGG, owing to everyone being in a big rush to get their remaining Big Name games out in time to compete for space under the Jingle-Shrub. Predictably, that means that this weeks thread will take me several days to actually deem "suitably done". So LET US COMMENCE!

And that means starting off with the PS4 and Player Unknown: Battlegrounds, the Hydrox to Fortnites Oreo. Run around a really big ol' battlefield! Introduce cordite to a great many of your friends soft-tissue! Eat a turkey dinner, I think?

That sounds-a-like Crimmus to me!


Now, if you're big on EXPLOSIVE GAMEPLAY in huge enviroments, but don't care so much to play with your friends and internet strangers, may I suggest something more in the scale of Just Cause 4? It's the heir-apparent to the throne that Mercenaries and Red Faction left empty, as the worlds most generous Explosion Philanthropist, Rico Rodriguez, finds one of the few island-nations he hasn't turned into a smoking crater yet, and proceeds to correct that oversight. This time the bad guy is threatening the world with GeoStorms.

I... may have done a better job of selling myself on the game, just now, than Square-Enixs entire marketing department did in the months leading up to this games release. Way to go, me!


Mutant Year Zero (not to be confused with Mutant League Football) looks very much like XCOM. Except that, outside of DEEPLY TACTICAL STRAT-SHOOTY GAMEPLAY, it's also a Tactical Espionage Action game. Set in the future, when animals have gained the power to walk like men, and human-peeps have gained the power to be X-Men. It looks pretty flippin' sweet and I'm honestly kind of surprised that this is the first I've heard of it.


Persona 5: Dancing in Starlight is the sequel to not Persona 5 (though also that), but Persona: Dancing All Night (which... well... is obvious, given the title, I guess). Take all your favorite Anime Teens with Anime Problems out on the town to save the world from cthonic horrors by cutting a rug. Or so I infer. I... haven't played either a dancing game or a Persona game in... quite a while. Sticking them together doesn't really make them more appealing to me.


Also up is another TT darlin; Subnautica! But all I know about it is that it is full of SCUBA-TERROR, so I ax'd one of the TT peeps what loves it to sum it up quickly; take it away, Flawg and JBEAR!!

Quote:
FalselogicToday at 7:29 PM
you are all alone on an aquatic planet
FalselogicToday at 7:29 PM
and you have to find your way off
you do this by locating items and then building things with them
JBearToday at 7:29 PM
Minecraft with a cool sci-fi story and spooky ocean monsters.
FalselogicToday at 7:29 PM
its my GOTY
and it looks better than minecraft
and isnt as granular
Now, I know that, between Falselogic and Jbear, one always lies and one always tells the truth, but they both agree on this one, so I guess it's probably safe to believe them!


Override: Mech City Brawl already had my attention with a title like that. And it looks like the gussied up return of War of the Monsters I've been waiting 15 years for! Gigantic Robots have all appeared in the same city, and they must WRECK ASS together and against one another to save the world from... well... nothing that's probably as bad as themselves, honestly. It's the sort of game I'm already very impatient looking for reactions to because dang, that my wheelhouse!


On multiple platforms, we've got ourselves a few other stand-outs as well! The least interesting (to me, at least, no doubt it has fans in people outside of me) of which being the Atelier Arland trilogy; Atelier Rorona: The Alchemist, Atelier Totori: The Adventurer and Atelier Meruru: The Apprentice (available individually or in a bundle), three JRPGs that I presume lean more heavilly on building stuff for item shops than on hunting down stray Evil Gods and level-grinding them into the dust. And which are, aesthetically, much more bishojo-y looking than the sort of game I skew towards.

Maybe they're really good! Maybe not! IDK!


Nextishly is a game that... surprised me, we'll say, Toki: Going Ape-Spit has returned, simply as Toki! Remember Toki? The... third or fourth most beloved primate-based Arcade game from the 80s? Well Microids sure as hell did, because here's Toki, back and better than ever for a whole new generation!

Okay, while obscure, Toki was a pretty fun game and the remake looks really friggin' snazzy, but... why Toki? Why is Toki back?

I'm genuinely asking! This is a weird choice for a remake!


And speaking of new games that are returns to a series that began in arcades in the 80s and now look incredibly nice, we have Monsterboy and the Cursed Kingdom, a game which further muddies the waters of the naming scheme of the Wonderboy/Monster Land series by combining them together! It looks pretty similar to the (extremely excellent) Wonderboy 3 remake from last year. Except built from the ground up for modern consoles instead of merely (well, "merely") being a gargantuan visual overhaul of an 8-bit game.

In any case, I'm keeping myself in the dark here because this is already under my Jingle-Shrub, waiting for the Jingleman to show up and actually give it to me so I don't cause a time-paradox.


Okay, that's enough of this JUNK for now. Tomorrow; MORE STUFF!
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:16 PM
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Where's Smash you monster
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:25 PM
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You forgot Battle Princess Madelyn, affectionately known as "Not Ghouls 'n Ghosts, honest!"

Speaking of perplexing remakes, how about Gods Remastered? It's that game I'd always play at the game store or during a rental or on some emulator, convinced that I really can figure it out if I just give it another chance. (I never do.)
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:27 PM
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if I gave you that, whatw ould you have to look forward to?

That’s the true meaning of Santa Law!
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:39 PM
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You forgot Battle Princess Madelyn
Sadly it was delayed a week.
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:41 PM
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What part of "Tomorrow, MORE STUFF!" do you guys not understand? It's a very big week, not just for Nintendo but for Sony, too.

And no, I'm not talking about the PlayStation Classic (though obviously some people not on TT will still want the 50Hz bad emulation machine), I mean like there's a lot of neat releases hitting PS4 this week. There's at least two more PS4 releases I could see Octo adding to the thread tomorrow 'cuz they don't come out until tomorrow.
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Old 12-05-2018, 05:45 PM
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I really want to play Atelier games eventually... the entire Arland trilogy in one bundle is appealing given that interest. They're also part of and indicative of the current trend of returning RPGs from around a decade ago, and that's a happy thing.
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Old 12-05-2018, 08:14 PM
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While I would prefer the Dusk series of the PS3/Vita Atelier expats, I'll certainly take the Arland series again.

(Plus the next new Atelier game in Japan is a return to Arland with Rorona's apparent daughter as the protagonist so re-releasing the Arland trilogy makes sense)
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Old 12-05-2018, 11:33 PM
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Subnautica is so worth it y'all!
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Old 12-06-2018, 12:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Octopus Prime View Post
Mutant Year Zero (not to be confused with Mutant League Football) looks very much like XCOM. Except that, outside of DEEPLY TACTICAL STRAT-SHOOTY GAMEPLAY, it's also a Tactical Espionage Action game. Set in the future, when animals have gained the power to walk like men, and human-peeps have gained the power to be X-Men. It looks pretty flippin' sweet and I'm honestly kind of surprised that this is the first I've heard of it.
Sadly, I think this one is going to slip under a lot of radars. I've been following it since it was announced, and it looks super rad.
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Old 12-06-2018, 05:11 PM
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Are you ready to rock? I said... are you Ready to ROCK?!?!

Okay, focusing mainly on Switch alone this week, and that means starting with a game that was stealth-released about a week ago; ARK: Survival Evolved! Which is, apparently, a lousy port of an already jankky game. Like building a house out of Jenga blocks over a fault-line. Live on a crazy Jurassic spaceship full of dinosaurs! Build a caveman society! And then get lasers and stuff! I guess? It's equal bits Survival Game and also Monster Hunter and apparently, infinitely confusing and now its portable and also ugly!


Next is Rival Mega-Gun, which came out on PS4 a couple of weeks ago, I think. It seems to be a competitive shmup that also leans in on Puyo-Pops flavor a bit; instead of dumping junk on your enemys side of the screen to mess themm up, playing well enough lets you turn into a giant boss monster to bring your opponent to a bullet hell of your own design!


Longstory is a high stakes date-em-up set in a high school full of treachery and danger! Unless you don't want to date anyone or get involved with the dangerous treachery. That's cool too. Or maybe you do want to date but your preferences in that regard don't skew towards the options covered. The game has you covered there too. Game is pretty inclusive.


Veering purposefully away from a surprisingly open LGBTQ-friendly dating sim to a game about a creepy crapster who spies on people and reports on what he sees to an oppressive and fascist government, as seen in Beholder. A game where you... well... are exactly the guy I just described. You stealth around the apartments you own seeing who is sufficiently fluent in sedition to warrant being carted away by the proper authorities. What a fun and jolly way to ring in December!


Next is not one but TWO arcade re-releases, and they're both good'uns! Rly Gooduns! Double Dragon II: The Revenge, the second (and arguably best) entry in the series! It is the year: Apocalypse and now Jimmy and Billy must fight not for love... but REVENGE! This is the arcade version, so that Disappearing Block section is nowhere to be seen. The other game is Twinkle Star Sprites, which, well, looks very much like that Rival Mega Gun game from a couple of paragraphs ago. Just anime as H*ck. And, I am also lead to understand it's also one of the secret gems of the Neo Geo, so there's that too!


Also up is everyones favorite cartography/Jigsaw puzzle board game; Carcassonne! Build and own the biggest kingdom you can possible manage while correctly lining up differently shaped puzzle pieces! DO this until you are the king of the BIGGEST land! It's been a long time since I last played Carassonne, so I don't recall if there was anything to it but that!


Out tomorrow (as I'm writing this) is also the newest Nintendo Supper Squid game; Super Squish Buddies: Ultimate. Yes, the Fracas Friends have come back for another scuffle and this time they've brought every dang person ever with them! Enjoy smashing a brother with Green Mario, Sonko the Fastdog, Shaggy 2 Dope, Goku, Geno, Minecraft Steve, Larry, Darryl, Darryl, Dante (from the Devil May Cry series), Benito Moussalini, the Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis, Jambi the Genie, Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo-Pan, Spider-Man, every single Power Ranger, Bill S Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc-Ock and Hulk Hogan. But not the Beatles.

The Beatles are not in this game.


Now if you're not in the mood for a tender and loving celebration of Nintendos entire history, how about a kind of slap-dash celebration of Segas history, between 1989 and 1995? WELL GOOD, because The Sega Genesis Classics Collection is out! Which is a collection of Phantasy Star 2, Phantasy Star 3, Phantasy Star 4, Shining Force, Shining Force 2 and Shining in the Darkness, all made portable!. It also has, like, 30-some odd other games too. Which just seems greedy. I'd have paid twice as much for just those 6 alone on the Switch. The emulation is kind of lackluster compared to many other retro compilations on the platform but, again, portable Phantasy Star 4!


And we're still not done talking about loving celebrations of Old Games, as we've got a brand new Katamari Damacy game! Well, a Brand Old Katamari Damacy game, at least, as Katamari Damacy Rerolled a FANCIED UP remake of the first one, that caught eyes and hearts way back on the PS2 so many years ago! Your dad got krunk and destroyed The Entire Universe! You've got to rebuild the whole thang ding your own little tiny self by adhereing gradually larger and larger objects to your little gummy-ball as you cruise around crowded cities full of trash and crabs!


Okay, that's all for now. The last of the JUNK AND KRUNK tomorrow!

Last edited by Octopus Prime; 12-07-2018 at 05:55 AM.
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Old 12-06-2018, 06:04 PM
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Bill S. Preston, Esq.

How dare you, sir.
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Old 12-06-2018, 06:43 PM
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Old 12-06-2018, 07:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Octopus Prime View Post
Next is not one but TWO arcade re-releases, and they're both good'uns! Rly Gooduns! Double Dragon II: The Revenge, the second (and arguably best) entry in the series! It is the year: Apocalypse and now Jimmy and Billy must fight not for love... but REVENGE! This is the arcade version, so that Disappearing Block section is nowhere to be seen. The other game is Twinkle Star Sprites, which, well, looks very much like that Rival Mega Gun game from a couple of paragraphs ago. Just anime as H*ck. And, I am also lead to understand it's also one of the secret gems of the Neo Geo, so there's that too!
DD2 is the best of the arcade games, but it is not as good as NES DD2 (even with bad platforming). I'm very glad to see it get THE HAMSTER TREATMENT, because the currently available version from DotEmu is... an arcade emulation from DotEmu. Have you always wanted an ugly modern HUD on your '80s arcade game? No, you haven't, but there it is. Likewise with Twinkle Star Sprites, actually, but at least the DotEmu release of that has the ROM in the folder so if you (like me) bought it, you can just boot the ROM in MAME or Final Burn Alpha and have a better experience, but hey, now it's gotten THE HAMSTER TREATMENT, so that's good. It rules, it's a puzzle shoot-'em-up.
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Old 12-06-2018, 09:17 PM
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Originally Posted by Octopus Prime View Post
Longstory is a high stakes date-em-up set in a high school full of treachery and danger! Unless you don't want to date anyone or get involved with the dangerous treachery. That's cool too. Or maybe you do want to date but your preferences in that regard don't skew towards the options covered. The game has you covered there too. Game is pretty inclusive.


I dearly hope Turkeyhawk is a romance option.
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Old 12-06-2018, 09:37 PM
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*applauds the thread sub-title*
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Old 12-07-2018, 06:39 AM
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I dearly hope Turkeyhawk is a romance option.
Having played this on my phone, I can indeed confirm that Turkeyhawk is a romance option.
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Old 12-07-2018, 08:10 AM
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First, thanks to Teg for finding a more appropriate Katamari image.

Second, TIME TO FINISH THIS, NERDS!

First up is Hello Neighbor: Hide & Seek (on PS4 and Switch), the prewuel to the Burbs'em-up that... that sure as heck was shoving its self down our throat a few months ago and which then immediately disappeared. Anyway, instead of being a Burbs-em-up this one is a Sad-em-up as you're one of the kids of the Neihbor who is playing hide and seek whilst dealing with FAMILY TRAUMA.


Next up is another classic series revived, though one that's far less mind-boggling than Toki; Jagged Alliance Rage, a follow-up to the Strat-y style shooty-mans game series which I didn't ever actually play before. But I always hear people talk about the first Jagged Alliance (and its sequels?) in revered tones, so I guess that's good! The trailer had, like, 15 seconds of gameplay in it and those fifteen seconds were pretty stuttery looking... so... consider my expectations reined.


And the final PS4 game this week, and certainly the one most interesting to TT is The Last Remnant Remastered; a greatly fancied up re-release of the game that represents the last time Kawazu was given any sort of big name AAA budget for one of his games. And, given that opportunity, he up and released a Kawazu game. Having a video game that trolls the players is old-hat at this point, but this is the only time I can recall a game that trolled the publisher. This version is based on the already greatly improved PC version, given a fancier coat of paint and so, yes, it is very much the Non-Smash Brothers Lock of the Week.


And heck, I've still got this window open, might as well cover the Switch games coming out early next week too. Especially since one of them fits the threads title so nicely; Guacamelee 2! Which is another triumph of waiting for a Switch Port to be announced, because that game only came out, like, three months ago! Once again, the universe is threatened by skeletons and only the strong muscles and stronger heart of Juan Agave, donning the mask of the greatest Luchador hero, can turn the tide and save the land of the living and dead!


Everspace is another game aimed squarely at the ol' Octo heart-strings; it's a Rogueishlike shooter in the Colony Wars vein. Which already had my attention. But it's also gotten much positive attention so I went ahead and gambled on it. It has an uphill battle to claim the coveted spot of "Best Airplane-based procedurally Generated Shooter away from Sky Rogue, Secret Best Airplane Game of The Year, but I remain optimistic that there's room in my heart for two.


Also up is Kingdom: Two Crowns, the sequel to Kingdom: New Lands, which I infer was very successful as its gotten a sequel, and it goes on sale a lot. I have absolutely no idea how true that statement I just presented is. In any case, you are the ruler of a kingdom you've up and ignroed and figure "Well, might as well walk the breadth of it and see how my underlings are doin'". Based on the trailer for... well... the first one (this one doesn't have one) it seems to be a kind of Of Mice & Sand/King Arthurs World mash-up. And... I am into that.


And the last thing coming out before next weeks thread goes up is Desert Child, which I originally inferred to be a Walking-Based Sads-em-up based on the title. But Then I looked at the description and said "Oooooooooooh!" and my eyebrows raised in an interested fashion. It is the future, and Mars is a MUCH more appealing prospect for long-term living than the Earth, and you've got two weeks to raise money to get your ass off this planet and on to that one, via the time honored tradition of Death Races, Organized Crime and Pizza Delivery. Looks a like Seicross and Fury Road and Cowboy Bebop had a funky baby.


Okay... took me three days but finally, this weeks thread is DONE.
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Old 12-07-2018, 11:48 AM
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Old 12-10-2018, 01:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Octopus Prime View Post
I always hear people talk about the first Jagged Alliance (and its sequels?) in revered tones, so I guess that's good!
You've likely heard people talking about JA2, which is typically the beloved entry, although the first JA game is also quality. Jagged Alliance is a lot like Shining Force, which is to say that it had a couple of really great turn-based games a couple of decades ago that people loved, and people have been waiting ever since for a sequel that's just more of what made those games great but instead keep getting anything but that.
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