Welcome one, welcome all, to the Talking Time Top 50 VG Box Art Exhibition

[muteKi]

Simple. Elegant. Works well converted to art in the game

[Issun]

Probably one of the most iconic video game boxes ever.

[muteKi]

'I had an S&K trapper keeper' is the most 90s phrase to be true of me.


Those things were not well made, hence their existence as a legacy thing associated with a decade 20ish years in the past

[Torzelbaum]

Originally Posted by BEAT

Yeah. They took the FEATURELESS VOID logo, and hastily dropped it on top of a monocrhome version of the Famicom Art. And the featureless void Logo ALREADY HAS a monochrome version of the sword guy in the Famicom art on it! So now we've got BIG colorless boring dude looking over his Son LITTLE colorless dude I mean holy shit.

RANKING: NEVER TALK TO ME OR MY SON AGAIN.

♫And the gaelicat's in the cradle and the throwing spoon
Little blue mage took a whale to the moon
When you castin' Warp, Dad?
I don't know when, but we'll dual tech then
You know we'll get a good feeling then♫

[Daikaiju]

The icon is damn nice. The box overall...


That is merely my opinion and should not be taken as fact.

[WisteriaHysteria]

I typically buy the argument for minimalism emphasizing a good logo. (Which is why I like all of the FF1 boxes BEAT hates.) But the big red stripe, the garish Seal of Approval, the gimmick advertisement/explanation, and proto-ESRB warning all get in the way of that philosophy here.

[BEAT]

Yeah thing is, If you're gonna use Minimalisim to emphasize a good Logo, the logo has to be GOOD.

Sonic and Knuckles logo? It's damn good!

The Final Fantasy 1 Logo is Just the words "FINAL FANTASY" with a doodle of some dude with horns in the middle.

[WisteriaHysteria]

Originally Posted by BEAT

Wat. It's Ugandan Knuckles...!?

[BEAT]

Racist-ass memes fuck off.

[BEAT]

Seriously fuck the Twitter Nazis who's idea of humor begins and ends with "A foreign accent."

[Torzelbaum]

Originally Posted by BEAT

the eyes peering out of the leaves on the right side of the image

So at the base of the bush that has those eyes there is some kind of reddish-purple looking thing. What the heck is that supposed to be!?

[WildcatJF]

Originally Posted by WisteriaHysteria

Wat. It's Ugandan Knuckles...!?

Can we not do this please?

[gahitsu]

Originally Posted by WildcatJF

Can we not do this please?

Indeed, let's not.

[muteKi]

Originally Posted by Torzelbaum

So at the base of the bush that has those eyes there is some kind of reddish-purple looking thing. What the heck is that supposed to be!?

A leaf I think?

[muteKi]

I just realized that BEAT is missing the copy of the game that I own (aside from the Genesis version)!

Two complete games! And also Sonic CD!

The manuals that came with the original individual releases of the games are now on the discs in PDF form!

RATING:
TO BE THIS GOOD TAKES NOISIVITCA
TO BE THIS GOOD TAKES ACTIVISION

[Johnny Unusual]

I've only just noticed now that Sonic is a five fingered cartoonman and for reasons unknown this is upsetting to me. Why does this put me ill at ease?

[Octopus Prime]

It’s incredible how often Sonic and Palz look off model on the covers to their own games.

[Yimothy]

Here's the version I have:

It's not great. I actually kind of bought into Sega Ozisoft's platinum/gold collection marketing as a kid, but I think this is the only game in the collection that I had. I'm pretty sure I got this game around the time it came out, so even though it looks like a budget reissue it might have been the only version released in Australia. Also I think the box is a VHS case rather than the usual MD clamshell, probably to avoid having to make ones that would fit the unusual cart shape. The cart just sits loose in it.

[BEAT]

And here I was thinking my list of 27 boxes that contain Sonic 3/& Knuckles was borderline excessive.

What a fool I was.

[Octopus Prime]

I rate it.... METAL WITH ATTITUDE

[muteKi]

The Platinum Collection release is interesting because to my knowledge it is the only official release of the original game that actually comes with a hard shell (all other releases used the somewhat flimsy cardboard shells that became more common partway into 1994 as used by Vectorman, most 32X games, Phantasy Star IV, Shining Force II, etc. (and, as implied above, they're exclusive to Sega's Australian distribution)

EDIT:

RATING: AT LEAST THEY FIT DOPEY KNUCKLES ON THE BACK COVER, BUT LOOK WHERE THEY DID IT

[muteKi]

Oh my god, I just discovered that the mainland Asia release of Sonic 3 has the throwback checkerboard box pattern seen on the early (like, pre-1993) releases of Genesis games, and thus the last region to switch from this pattern to the "platform margin label" style as seen in most of the boxes


RATING: GREEN HILL ZONE AT NIGHT

[BEAT]

WHELP.

GONNA GO BACK AND EDIT ALL THESE IN, BECAUSE APPARENTLY I AM AN ACTUAL MADMAN.

[BEAT]

LET'S LOOK AT
THE OTHER BOXES
WE ALL GO FAST TOGETHER AND WE ALL GO FAST FOREVER
#20 - SONIC & KNUCKLES
PART ONE

S3 - GENESIS - NORTH AMERICA



So you'd think that the eyes peering out of the leaves on the right side of the image are supposed to be Knuckles, but they're not! Knuckles has two separate eyes, while those are drawn in that weird connected style, like Sonic's!

So what other character in this series is drawn with connected eyes, and is known for stalking Sonic?



AAAAAAAAAAMMMMYYYYYYYYYY!!!

RANKING: AMY WHAT ARE YOU DOING.


S3 - GENESIS - NORTH AMERICA - EARLY VERSION



This early version of the box looks a LOT like the American Box for Sonic 1 but with enough changed up to keep me from thinking of it as a quick edit.

Also it's kinda weird that it goes all in on the whole checkerboard thing, considering that Sonic 3 is the first sonic game to NOT have a checkerboardy first level.

Weird.

RANKING: LOST TO TIME.


S3 - MEGA DRIVE - JAPAN



The first few Sonic games got Japanese boxes that all followed a very specific pattern. You got a picture of Sonic, A white background, and a bunch of weird abstract colored shapes like it's a button-down shirt from the 80s. Sonic 3's follows this pattern completely, resulting in a design that wouldn't look out of place on the shirt your uncle is wearing in a picture taken 40 years ago.

RANKING: B-


S3 - MEGA DRIVE - PAL REGIONS



Oh my god look at this! Just look at it! Look at Sonic's terrible weird pose! And knuckles crooked grumpy mouth! This is fucking amazing and I love it!

RANKING: A+++


S3 MEGA DRIVE - AUSTRALIA - DOUBLE PACK



AND
MEGA GAMES
1

RANKING: A+++++


S3 - MEGA DRIVE - AUSTRALIA - PLATINUM COLLECTION

FRONT


BACK


Now THIS is one classy box. The sort of box an ostentatiously wealthy man might keep in his vast personal library, lovingly shelved between the Z volume of the encyclopedia Britannica (1978 edition) his first run printing of the Voynich Manuscript.

RANKING:



S3 - MEGA DRIVE - CHINA

FRONT


BACK


There's something inherently hilarious to me about the way they used the title screen as the background for the back cover textdump. Muteki claims that the grid pattern framing this box was phased out a year in all other regions, making its presence here something of an anomaly. To that I say, OH MY GOD MUTEKI WHAT ARE YOU SOME KINDA NERD?!

RANKING: NERRRRRRRRRD


S3 - MEGA DRIVE - SOUTH KOREA



Now that's more like it! South Korea knows that the PROPER way to display a video game is with no border at all! That way there's nothing to distract you from Sonic's head, which looks more and more OFF with every second I look at it.

RANKING: IT'S SO WEIRD AND ROUND OH MY GOD.


S&K - MEGA DRIVE - PAL REGIONS



It's virtually identical to the North American version, except with the PAL Reigion border, and a helpful diagram illustrating how the PATENTED LOCK-ON TECHNOLOGY works. Nothing too earth-shattering, but it gives me an excuse to talk about just how GOOD the S&K Logo is, because it is GREAT.

It's a simple, flat logo showcasing the game's two competing protagonists that does so much with so little. Sonic seems uncertain and unsure of this new fellow who's intruding on his side, just as Knuckles constantly intrudes on Sonic's path through the game. Knuckles half is entirely his own, Just as his path through the game is completely without interference from Sonic. It's Sonic's game, but Knuckles is the the one stealing the show.

It's simple and iconic and PERFECT and I love it.

RANKING: JUST, MAN, WHAT A GOOD LOGO.


S&K - MEGA DRIVE - JAPAN



COMPUTER! ZOOM! ENHANCE, BLACK AND WHITE! PHOTO NEGATIVE!

SONIC RACES THROUGH THE GREEN FIELDS.
THE SUN RACES THROUGH A BLUE SKY FILLED WITH WHITE CLOUDS.
THE WAYS OF THE HEART ARE MUCH LIKE THE SUN. THE SONIC RISES AND RESTS; THE SUN RISES AND SETS.
DON'T GIVE UP ON THE SUN. DON'T MAKE THE SUN LAUGH AT YOU.

*Sniff*. That's fuckin beautiful, man. More video games need to put slam poetry about the beauty of a sunny day on the front cover.

RANKING: BEST SPOKEN WORD ENTRY AT OPEN MIC MONDAYS.


S&K - MEGA DRIVE - AUSTRALIA - PLATINUM COLLECTION



I was mistaken earlier, when I said the Sonic 3 Platinum collection box would be the Encyclopedia Britannica and the Voynich Manuscript on the Rich asshole's shelf. The sequence should have been The Encyclopedia Britannica, Sonic 3, Sonic & Knuckles, and THEN the Voynich Manuscript.

RANKING: WE APOLOGIZE FOR THIS ERROR.


S&K - MEGA DRIVE - BRAZIL



It's so weird seeing the words "MEGA DRIVE" on a red background instead of a blue one. So weird!

RANKING: TECHTOY


S3&K - SATURN - JAPAN



Sonic Jam was the first release of the games where you could play through the complete S3&K experience with just 1 physical purchase! So that's cool.

Being a collection of 16 bit Sonic games, This box goes ALL-IN on the Japanese 16-bit Sonic Cover style with Character portraits, And a chaotic background of random shapes and colors. And this is where I admit that I kinda... don't like that style. It just feels so slapdash and thrown-together. It's attention grabbing, but it doesn't make me want to look at it longer to appreciate it, you know?

RANKING: C+


S3&K - SATURN - NORTH AMERICA.



That said, a jumble of loud colors and shapes is definitely better than the ＢＡＢＹ ＢＬＵＥ ＶＯＩＤ on the North American cover.

RANKING: D


S3&K - SATURN - PAL REGIONS



None of these Sonic Jam covers are great, but at the very least the PAL cover makes a little more effort, taking the drawings of Sonic Tails and Knuckles, and placing them atop a simple, but pleasant background, with cloudy skies, reflective ponds, and some of the iconic checkerboard soil.

Also worth noting, Sonic Jam is (as near as I can tell) the first game where Sonic wasn't subtly re-designed for western cover art. More on that when I get to a more illustrative example.

RANKING: B-


S3&K - GAME.COM

FRONT


BACK


Oh MAN, the Game Dot Com. Just... MAN. How the fuck did they let that thing happen?

So obviously the box art is straight up stolen from Sonic R, but I'd like to direct your attention to the screenshots on the back of the box. They're pretty butt-fugly, yeah, but given the limitations of the system, I could see someone going "well hey, that's pretty good considering what they've got to work with" right?

Well bad news hypothetical overly forgiving individual. They're all fakes! Yeah! Doctored Genesis screenshots that were zoomed in on and overlaid with fake HUDS! This is especially obvious in the last one, where they forgot to zoom in for the right resolution, AND somehow left in the phrase "Get BLUE Spheres" as though that were a message that would make sense in a black & white game.

So what does the ACTUAL game contained in this box look like?

THAT GIF WAS FOUND ON THE BAD GAME HALL OF FAME'S ARTICLE ON SONIC JAM FOR THE GAME.COM. IT IS AN AMAZING READ, AND I IMPLORE YOU TO CHECK IT OUT.

Yeah.

RANKING: GODDAMN.

TO BE CONCLUDED!

[Octopus Prime]

Did Sonic ALWAYS have four fingers and a thumb, or is this just a weird one-off occurrence.

Because I never noticed it before and it is freakin' my beacon

[muteKi]

Sonic's 4 fingers has been a pretty common and established thing. Look at the Sonic 1 box art (and title screen!) sometime.

[Johnny Unusual]

Originally Posted by Octopus Prime

Did Sonic ALWAYS have four fingers and a thumb, or is this just a weird one-off occurrence.

Because I never noticed it before and it is freakin' my beacon

I know, right?

[BEAT]

LET'S LOOK AT
THE OTHER BOXES
YEAH I GOT SPEED BIG STUPID SPEED DUMB FUCKING SPEED
#20 - SONIC & KNUCKLES
PART TWO

S3&K - PC - NORTH AMERICA




Well hey, there's Sonic, and there's Knuckles! And this box collects them together in one place! Simple, and descriptive!

RANKING: C-


S3&K - PC - PAL REGIONS



I already talked about how the logo is good! I'M NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT HOW THE LOGO IS GOOD AGAIN!

RANKING: SONIC SCREENSAVER!


S3&K - PC - UNITED KINGDOM



Is there anything better in life than limited-run budget re-printings of PC games by small publishing houses that always make it a point to take up half the box's cover with their name?

No. No there is not.

RANKING: XPLOSIV!


S3&K - PC - UNITED KINGDOM AGAIN!



TURNS OUT YOU CAN IMPROVE ON PERFECTION!

RANKING: XPLOSIV!!!


S3&K - PC - JAPAN



I'm still not a huge fan of the WHITE BACKGROUND + RANDOM SHAPES design of the Japan Classic Sonic Boxes, but I kinda like this one's relatively restrained take on the concept. I'm a little surprised that this design got used for the PC collection, as it would have worked just fine for the Japanese Mega Drive release. Go figure.

RANKING: B-


S3&K - PC

FRONT


BACK


Upon it's release, The Sonic & Garfield Pack was a universally beloved masterpiece, with critics heaping praise upon both of its stars. It wasn't until later that the public learned of the project's deeply troubled production. Irreconcilable creative differences between the two lead to near-daily arguments, and at least one on-set fistfight. When production finally wrapped, both had vowed to never work with eachother again.

Sonic laid out his side of dispute in an incendiary Rolling Stone interview.

So what was it like working with Garfield?

Worst job of my life. That orange slob was so fucking slow! We'd all be all set up 6AM sharp every morning, Just, ready to go like a bunch of professionals. Except Garfield would be nowhere to be seen! The entire staff would be stuck standing around going "Where the hell is Garfield?" and hoping they wouldn't have to be the one to go and bang on his trailer door and drag his lazy ass out from under the covers while he did that creepy thought broadcasting thing to bitch about Mondays, regardless of the actual day of the week. I don't think I ever saw that fucker outside of his trailer by choice before noon.

So you don't see yourself doing any more collaborations with him.

Fuckin' right I don't. From now on, I'm only working with people I already know and trust, starting with someone I know better than anyone else.

And who would that be?

ME.

RANKING:

S3&K - PC... AGAIN



Thus the two stars went their separate ways. Sonic immediately made good on his promise to collaborate more with himself, resulting his first project as his own co-star: the Twin 2 Pack. Its relative success encouraged Sonic keep pulling that thread, resulting in one of the oddest phases of his career.

As for Garfield, he was never seen on a team again. Over the next few months the legendary Fat Cat withdrew completely from the public eye. The months of absence turned into years, causing many to speculate that Garfield had died years ago, or worse, had never existed at all.

RANKING:



S3&K - PC AGAIN AGAIN



Emboldened by the success of his first self-collaboration, Sonic's desire to surround himself with himself with went from a worrying trend to a dangerous fixation. Two Sonics was one thing, but four? How many Sonics would Sonic need to Sonic around with before he would be satisfied?!

RANKING: SONIC PLEASE


S3&K - PC AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN



It wasn't until the disastrous SEGA PC MEGAPACK when Sonic finally admitted he has a problem.

"Yeah, the whole teaming up with a bunch of alternate versions of myself thing just got completely out of hand near the end" he related in a later interview with Entertainment Tonight. "I guess I'd be willing to come back to it eventually, but I'd have to keep it small, like just me and one other me from way back. And maybe only do it for big anniversaries".

RANKING: SEGA BASS FISHING.


S3&K - PLUG & PLAY CONSOLES - EUROPE



Lol look at these fuckin things.

RANKING: F-


S3&K - GAMECUBE



Little bit on the generic side.

RANKING: C


S3&K - PS2



Okay, better, but can we take it even further?

RANKING: B


S3&K - XBOX



I'm starting to really feel it now! We're almost there!!

RANKING: A-


S3&K - PS2 AGAIN



YES! PERFECT! FUCKING PERFECT!

RANKING: A+++


S3&K - PS3 - NORTH AMERICA



So way back in part one, I mentioned that Sonic was subtly redesigned for western releases. This is what I'm talking about. instead of a whole bunch of quills all over his back, Sonic's got this Mowhawk thing going on. It's one of those dumb details that you don't really notice unless you're looking for it. It's on all the Genesis-era boxes, then disappears entirely for the rest of the franchise's history, save this one exception which is a deliberate throwback.

Oh also the North American 360 Cover is the exact same whatever.

RANKING: THROWBACK THURSDAY!


S3&K - XBOX 360 - PAL REGIONS



The PAL region version of the game was renamed Ultimate MEGA DRIVE collection, and Sonic was cruelly robbed of his top billing! Unacceptable!

RANKING: F---------


S3&K - DS - NORTH AMERICA



Sonic is good. Green hill is all pixely and blocky like I like! No complaints here!

RANKING: B


S3&K - DS - EUROPE



WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU ASSHOLES DO WITH MY PIXELY AND BLOCKY GREEN HILL?!?!?!?!?!

RANKING: F-------

[Octopus Prime]

BEAT POSTS FAST DOGS

On top of all the everything else in these posts, kind of want to thank you for mentioning Bad Game Hall of Fame, a site I didn’t know existed and which exists extremely firmly in my wheelhouse.

[BEAT]

I'M A HELPER!