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  #211  
Old 11-07-2016, 08:54 AM
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I think you just answered your own question:

Fair enough.
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  #212  
Old 11-08-2016, 12:01 AM
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Default The Groovie Goolies

The Groovie Goolies

Bah, if I knew this was coming up, I might have rushed this to get it in for Halloween.

Also, you spelled groovy and ghoulies wrong, TV people. This isn't like Mortal Kombat where the K makes it cool. Unless these guys are oozing from every orifice, it's not a good change. Did you think that your audience was nearly illiterate but literate enough that writing it slightly phonetically would help? For some reason, Groovie doesn't bother me as much as Goolies.



We start with an odd shot of what one can assume to be Dracula's legs. You can assume it is Dracula because the piano player has a cape and we see Frankenstein's Monster playing Frankenstein's Monster's Drums made of bones (possibly those of Frankenstein's Self). I guess it could be Liberace hanging out with a new crowd, but I'm sure the rights were already purchased by Hanna Barbera for the Liberace Old West Mysteries Hour. Anyway, this is a weird shot to establish this world. Not necessarily bad, if trying to give us an aura of excitement when we finally reveal Dracula after hinting at him, though I am doubtful.

Oh, I should also point out that the piano also has keys around the foot area. Not much point to this observation, but there they are.

We then see Dracula, from behind, playing the piano, while a pair of arms attached to the piano conduct him.

Then an exterior shot of what I assume to be Groovy Goolie Manor (called Horrible Hall, on the sign), which has a viking boat on the roof for some reason. I'm sure it's essentially to the Groovy Goolies mythos, though.
Also, has there ever been a castle in the real world built not only by a cliff (which I think IS a thing that happens) but is only accessible by a narrow walkway (not a bridge but naturally occurring) and with the exception of that area, there's almost NO land surrounding said castle? Because this happens in fiction a lot. Granted, it's usually in comedies, but that's got to come from a non-comedic source, right? I'd do the research, but I have no idea how to ask the above question succinctly for my studies.

"Everybody shout!
Come on now, sing out!
It's time for the goolies get-together."

We then see a woofman playing a guitar harp thing with bat-parts.
Next we see Frankenstein's Monster on Frankenstein's Skateboard. He's not even being animated. I think his animation cell is being slid across the background cell in a sub-"my planet needs me" move. Dracula looks at him, then turns his head to the left. The wolfman then starts skate board up, and then immediately ceases being animated after he takes on a kind of half-curtsey pose. Dracula looks to his left again and Frankenstein is still in his immobile state. Dracula looks to the right again. The woofman is in a much better, most aggressive pose. Dracula finally realizes that he is in between two skateboarding monsters charging straight at each other for reasons unknown, freaks out and gets crashed into by the monsters.

I actually kind of like this gag because I thought they were just cutting to some random shit at first and it paints Dracula as a slow-thinker. It took him a real long time to figure this out. I feel like it could have been genuinely and not accidentally funny if the scene took a full minute.

Also... was the monsters end game to crash into each other? Neither monster seems "out of control" on his board and they are just stupidly speeding into each other when everyone should at least be able to see down the hall they are all in.

Then we see a close up of the woofman's hand, presumably from the same animation as before because animation ain't cheap, but Filmation is. We then see Frankenstein's Monster: The Monster, The Wolfman and Dracula around a bed. Because of the weakness of the animation, it is difficult to tell if they are trying to do a scare pose or are currently being mugged by the bed. Wolfman's kind of selling it, but everyone else seems pretty wooden.

Suddenly a jack-in-the-box pops out of the bed.

In reaction, Frankenstein's smile turns to confusion and his eyes start flashing, which I assume means that a few more hits and this boss battle is over. Dracula too let's his body make a two-frame stuttering motion, which I assume is to represent fear and not some horrible disease that causes his body to shake. The Wolfman actually is animated (maybe you should have just made the cartoon about him if he was the only one you were going to half-try with.

Then we get the Wolfman running away, who is overtaken by Frankenstein, who, in turn, is overtaken by Dracula's Monster... himself! It's really weirdly done, though, because as soon as a monster is passed, things get strange for him. Look at this...



The Wolfman clearly begins running backwards the moment Frankenstein passes him, as if he cannot break free of the gravity of the jack-in-the-box. Once Frankenstein is passed, then he begins walking in place. No one passes Dracula so I guess he's doing OK. Clearly someone was tired at the studio and they said "Good enough," and no one contradicted him because they couldn't get the energy up for screwing up some animation on a cartoon called "The Groovie Goolies". With that spelling.

Anyway, all the monsters hide behind a pillar and The Post-Modern Prometheus' Monster sticks his head out. The fact that it is just him makes it just a little bit delightful.

"Come on, everybody join the Goolies.
They're going to do their thing for you."

Dear God, what does that mean? I mean, I know what their thing is: Murder! These are all murderers. And they are doing it for me. Please, don't. I don't want you to kill in my name.

"They're kinda strange but they're real funny."

Doubtful. Big warning when your comedy show has to tell you the characters in the show you are about to watch is funny.

We then see a lamp that looks like an owl with a lampshade made of talons. It blinks on and off and the eyes stay lit. It's David Lynch levels of weird and unsettling.

We then see Dracula peeking from behind the pillar, which kind of undoes that pillar-based enjoyment moment previous.

"And you'll be glad to know they love you, too!"

Pretty presumptuous that you think you are reciprocating my love, cartoon show.

Dracula draws back his head and the Wolfman sticks his head out and in and out and in and out. He then sings along with the word "too" and then does something weird with his mouth.



There are no words.

We then see the Wolfman playing his guitar AGAIN (with the same animation). Then we see The Patchwork Man's Creator's Monster playing his drums. Then Dracula materializes followed by the Wolfman. I don't think that's one of the wolfman's powers but I'll just assume that's some editing fun. If not, we will soon all be plagued by teleporting wolfmen who kill to please us. If they ask for a name for a victim, learn their own name. This will stymie them. You can also name another werewolf, I guess, but then he might get bitten and become a super-werewolf. So beware.

Anyway, we then see the same animation of the wolfman playing the guitar for the FOURTH TIME. The guitar spins and then we see our heroes running down a hallway. Though it is the same hallway walking animation as before, this time, they actually are running in sensible directions and speeds.

"Everybody shout,
Come on, now, sing out!
It's time for the Goolie get together.
You're going to see,
how funny they can be."

Not very, I assume.

"Cause it's time for the Groovie Goolie show!"

Now we see a goofy ghost making a face Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy book cover planet style, leaving behind a cloud. From behind the cloud, we see the show's title, with "Goolies" in oozing green letters. So I guess they actually succeeded in having goo. I apologize, terrible TV show.

BTW, clearly the opening, and perhaps the entire show, spent most of their time, money and effort on animating the goofy ghost that you see for maybe 0.8 seconds.

Did It Make Me Want To Watch It?

No. Not enough goo to really justify "Goolies".

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

This show has a laugh track. Another reason for not wanting to watch the show. Also, apparently there was a Daffy Duck and Porky Pig Meets the Groovie Goolies TV movie. It was the first time Warner Bros. loaned out their great characters to another company to hang out with shitty characters. Still, even then, someone knew to keep Bugs Bunny away from that trainwreck.
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  #213  
Old 11-08-2016, 05:14 AM
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I do not know how to classify that image of them running...
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  #214  
Old 11-08-2016, 08:02 AM
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Also... was the monsters end game to crash into each other? Neither monster seems "out of control" on his board and they are just stupidly speeding into each other
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  #215  
Old 12-12-2016, 04:49 PM
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Default Hanna-Barbera's World of Super Adventure

Hanna-Barbera's World of Super Adventure


OK, this is basically just all the Hanna-Barbera adventure shows crammed into a half-hour show. A repackaging, if you will. That's fine.

We start with a star field. As I try to guess from what show this particular star field is from we are greeted with the title.

"Hanna-Barbera's World of Super Adventure" pops on the screen and is loudly told to us. We also get a logo with basically all of the characters in it.

We then get quick cuts to a bunch of the characters who go on super adventures for this show.

Birdman!
Space Ghost and Friends!
Mightor!
Big Fist Spock and Friends!
Rusty Venture on a Dinosaur!
Jim Henson's Mightor Babies!
Mr. Clean!
A Whale!
Rock band of superheroes!
Americanized Gigantor!
The Fantastic Four!
The Herculoids!
Space Ghost again!

Oh, wait, I think they are getting into action scenes rather than continuing the role call.

"Featuring the most fantastic collection of spectacular superheroic stars ever assembled." Man, if he thinks this is impressive, wait till he lives to see Deathmate.

"They will take you on adventures... in space!"
As previously mentioned, we see Space Ghost, turning invisible.

"Meeting strange creatures."
This is accurate, as we see ant-men shooting energy out of their antennas. I mean, we've all seen it before, but not every day.

"To exotic lands, and fantastic flights of fancy."
To demonstrate this, a genie summons a camel in his hand, then puts to kids on it. The camel, now bewinged flies away, and the genie disappears, save for his unnerving Cheshire Cat smile.

"To jungle planets"
At which point we see the human woman from the Herculoids using her slingshot.

"and mysterious invaders"
Where we see a somewhat too blue Galatus apparently belching (you tell me what that weird move he does would be!) and making his eyes glow (which could be the equivalent of belching for an unknowable space god).

"To prehistoric times and super forces."
We see a guy bouncing between tightly strung vines which looks like the funnest thing. We also see Mightor, which is fine, I guess.

"To modern winged avengers, to giant terrifying creatures against primitive powers"
We see Birdman and a Herculoid guy fighting a big spider.

"In space, land, sea and air."
We see lots of stuff, OK.

"It's a variety of stars: mighty, musical, athletic, extraordinary."
We see the Impossibles. I mean, I guess you can be mighty without being athletic, but athleticism seems like somewhat less of a draw when mighty is on the table.

"From fun-tastic to the fantastic."
At which point we see Fantastic Four stuff. I feel like saying the portmanteau and transitioning to one half the portmanteau seems like... not even a step down, but bad form, somehow.

"Where amazing weapons, men and robots meet in combat in the far out reaches of the universe."
OK, another bit of order nitpicking based simply on "what feels right to me." I feel like starting with weapons rather than men is a misstep. Weapons are cool and all, but it feels like sentience gets top billing. Anyway, a rocket gets blown up by a UFO or some shit.

"Dedicated to protecting the peace, these fantastic heroes defend the weak, right the wrongs, and battle against the forces of evil everywhere."

I ain't gonna lie to ya, the action scenes that accompany the narration is all pretty fun. A genie launched himself at foes after propelling himself with a giant bow.

"And now it's take off time for The Gathering of the Greatest!"
Wait, did the show change it's title over the course of the credits?

"Hanna-Barbera's World of Super Adventure."
False alarm. They remembered their show name, you guys.

Did It Make Me Want To Watch It?

Only a little.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

It told me very little that I would be interested in or didn't guess already.
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  #216  
Old 12-14-2016, 02:46 PM
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Default The Harlem Globetrotters

The Harlem Globetrotters

I'm not really a sports guy, but if you are going to make a TV series based on an athletic team rather than an individual, the Globetrotters make the most sense. They are an exhibition team who "play a game" of basketball, which is really them showing off cheeky basketball tricks and almost always winning pre-planned games (it should be noted that apparently 20-30 percent is actual real playing, which once ended, shockingly, with the Washington Generals winning! I believe this opened up one of the seals that where intended to hold back the gods of a broken multiverse in their place and brought us closer to the final entropy. The audience was bummed, at any rate.) So their playful style and fun, upbeat vibe would lend themselves to animation, right?

Let's find out.



First, we hear whistling as basketballs are being passed around. This is a good start. It sure doesn't hurt that we are hearing the sounds of basketballs being passed and dribbled, which is like an angel's choir to me. Does that fall in the feild of ASMR? I don't know enough about that subject to get it right. But it's pretty obvious that something is... off. Not bad off. But there is no Sweet Georgia Brown, which is the famous theme of the New York City Harlem Globetrotters. I mean, you already bought the rights to the Globetrotters, would it be that much harder to get that version of Sweet Georgia Brown? But at least, this is kind of a fun theme, and pretty strong in parts.

So after the ball is passed around a few times, the Globetrotters stick their heads into the frame and say "Hey!" It's well animated, but there's something about it that is so in sync that it looks kind of weird. Not that the sound is synced with the movie, just all the mouths look the same. I don't know why in this case it seems weird, as it seems like a common animation to have characters do that. Maybe their mouths are a little too big or something.

Then one guy's head pops in front of the American flag and says "Mutt!" I listened to this many times, but it's all I hear. I mean, maybe "Mud!" but mostly "Mutt!" I don't know what this means, but it could be the last key to finding the lost Globetrotter treasure. I mean, don't get to excited, the treasure is just a bunch of basketballs, but still, the fun of unravelling the Globetrotter's puzzles is a prize unto itself.

Suddenly, Americana and Harlem Globetrotter images flash across the screen at a rapid pace, before the Globetrotters saying "hey" animated is reused, only this time they are saying "Globetrotters". We get more Americana/globetrotter imagery (red, white, blue, stars) before moving on to silhouetted globetrotters running across pictures of famous places across the world. I really hope they did play basketball in the Taj Mahal, near Mount Fuji or on (in?) a giant Buddha . Anyhoo, we see a ton more photos of famous places, as the shadow basketball players chase a bouncing ball, drive in a tight van and do neat little tricks.

BTW, the part where they are just following the ball makes me wish the reason they travel to all these places is because the ball gets loose and they follow the ball to various countries across the Earth. None of them give up and the ball never loses momentum. The Globetrotters are so ball crazy, they follow their ball to the ends of the Earth and beyond. I mean, they are even following the ball in their van in one scene. I know it's all metaphorical, following their basketball dreams across the Earth, but I want it to be literal.

Also, worth noting, they seem to be traveling with a pet. Perhaps this is what is meant by "MUTT!"

Next, they do some competetantly animated basketball tricks, followed by a guy thinking, followed by a dog with shoes on his paws shrugging (as if to say "I don't know how these got here"), an elderly cheerleader, capped off by the "Hey" Globetrotters animation, only this time the guy at the top's head flies off his body and towards the audience. It's a sort of beautiful chaos.



Anyway, the theme song is whistled and clapped as the America imagery flashes and the ball is bounced between them with a shot of their legs. We get the "Hey" shot again. This is followed by the guy who said "Mutt!" But this time, he is clearly saying "What?" Going back, I still only hear "Mutt!" but I choose to believe this is my failing.

Then they scat right into the titles.

I got to say, this is a pretty cool, fun opening credits sequence. Despite not having or using "Sweet Georgia Brown", their own theme song, though not exactly an earworm, if pretty darn fun and the editing is pretty good. Rating: good opening

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?
It made me want to watch the opening.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

Apparently, as you might suspect, actual Globetrotters appeared, but were voiced by other voice actors including Scatman Crothers, AKA Hong Kong Phooey and the guy who gets an axe in the abdomen in the Shining. Also, though the whole series has a laugh track, apparently the second season has an "inferior laugh track". This is fascinating to me. Why? Did they lose the rights to the first laugh track? Apparently the second one was made by the studio, so was it a "we can do it better" arrogance? I'm genuinely curious about laugh track politics.

Before I check what the name of the dog is, I'm going to throw out some potential names:

Dribble
Rebound
Lay Up
Full Court Press
Wilt Chamberlain: The Dog

OK, let me check. The dogs name is... Dribbles. Fuck. So close. Also, Dribbles sounds much grosser. Sure, he dribbles, but from which orifice?

Last edited by Johnny Unusual; 12-15-2016 at 04:22 AM.
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  #217  
Old 12-14-2016, 10:36 PM
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Also, though the whole series has a laugh track, apparently the second season has an "inferior laugh track". This is fascinating to me. Why? Did they lose the rights to the first laugh track? Apparently the second one was made by the studio, so was it a "we can do it better" arrogance? I'm genuinely curious about laugh track politics.
I'm betting it was a "we can save money by not paying someone else for a laugh track" move.
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  #218  
Old 01-09-2017, 08:35 AM
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Default Help!... It's the Hair Bear Bunch!

Help!... It's the Hair Bear Bunch!



First, we see a motley crew of bears (not a Mötley Crüe of bears, which I would really like to see)tiptoeing in a classic exaggerated manner before hiding behind a tree way to thin for any of them to reasonable hide behind... yet all of them manage to do so. This is a parade of cartoon cliches that were funny, like, once. Probably around 1926 when all cartoon characters ever did was play a banjo, bob up and down and get crooned to by a racist caricature of a blues singer. I won't lie, if I do that pantomime tippy-toe thing, I enjoy it and find it amusing. But it doesn't really work in cartoons when that's all that's going on.

Granted, one could argue that tiptoeing in such a manner is not a joke so much as part of the physical language of cartoons. Fair enough, but you know 100% for sure if this cartoon has a laugh track, then that is one of the things the editor is going to decide is meant to be laughed at. Just like the tree thing.

Whatever the case, the theme music sounds like it entered some wackiness contest and it knows the only way to win is synthesized squeaky farts and empty cans being used as a xylophone.

The bears sneak past some villainous looking guards and enter the zoo, named "The Wonderland Zoo". Under cover of darkness, the bears return to their habitat, which has a secret spy entrance. A short one with a hat steps on a rock in their cave, which acts as a button to flip part of the cave with three ratty looking sleeping bags to reveal three fancy looking beds with lamps, curtains and abstract art.

A larger bear with a hat that covers his eyes flips another switch to reveal a stove and a fridge. The bear, being the kind of animal who probably eats a lot of food, eats a whole roast chicken. This is another thing that is less a joke than classic cartoon filler and tells us something of the bear (he likes to eat), but again, not I can only think that if this wasn't the opening, there'd be a laugh track here. It's not this show's fault, I know. The problem is the system that would allow that to happen.

Anyway, the third bear, and the only one who is hairy in a very notable way, leans against a wall. A small chair comes out and carries him to a rock with a TV inside it as he looks at a piece of paper. The TV has a little flower on the screen. This might be a thing bears watch. I don't know.
Anyway, there's a theme song too.

"In the Wonderland Zoo,
Where the Surgeon Bears who,
Stay at home every night,
Never quarrel or fight.
We don't even bite."

I assume Surgeon is a last name. If not, they are burying the lead on a fantastic premise. Lyric-wise, if I heard it correctly, it seems that the sentence got away from then. I mean, look "In the Wonderland Zoo, where the Surgeon bears who stay home every, night never quarrel or fight..." what? I could be missing something, but it feels like there should be a second part to that sentence. When you added "who" to the song, it basically mean that now the verbs that come next are part of the noun that is the bears, rather than what they do (I may not have articulated that thought well, but clearly they didn't either). So you never to tell us more about the Wonderland Zoo, song. Am I wrong on this?

Also, the bear who says "we don't even bite" is clearly just Yogi Bear again, because someone just plain ran out of voices.

"So don't yell 'help, help,' here come the bears!
Help! Help! Here come the bears!
Help! Help! Here come the bears!
Let's split."

As one of the bears croaks "Let's split", all of the mechanisms are undone and the cave looks much more humble once more. The bears run out of their habitat and are spotted by the incompetent and (based on their nasty countenance) jerky zoo keepers. The bears escape on a pantomime motorcycle (or they own an invisible motorcycle) and the two parties race around the zoo.

"So don't yell 'help, help,' here come the bears!
Help! Help! Here come the bears!
Help! Help! Here come the bears!
Let's split."

It should be noted that the "Help! Help!"s and "Let's split." were lines by random zoo animals.

"Help!... Its the Hair Bear Bunch!"

The bears ride their imagination cycle onto frame where the title is waiting for them.

There was something about this one that made me feel sure I had something to say about it. There was something about this that felt very Goober and the Ghost Chasers in that, aside from not having heard of it before, seems kind of made up and feels both really generic yet also odd. But... it just strikes me kind of dull despite the flamboyant character designs of the bears.
Except one thing... what are the Hair Bears? I mean, what is their deal? I would have assumed from the title that maybe they are hippie bears, but instead they seem like they are hip, wealthy stylish bears. Also, probably swingers? I think their pad gets them laid. A lot.

Also, the "Help! Help!" thing doesn't make it clear if we want the bears assistance, or if it's like "Oh, no! Those bears are here!" Or both. The credits, don't make the premise too clear or enticing.

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?

I thought it would, but no.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

They do, indeed, have an invisible motorcycle. It is never explained, apparently. I think this is for the best. They are the Hair Bear Bunch because their leader is named Hair Bear. They have a bachelor pad and like to leave the zoo on nightly excursions. So, I guess the intro didn't tell me much because there isn't much to tell.
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Old 01-09-2017, 06:48 PM
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"In the Wonderland Zoo,
Where the Surgeon Bears who,
Stay at home every night,
Never quarrel or fight.
We don't even bite."

I assume Surgeon is a last name. If not, they are burying the lead on a fantastic premise. Lyric-wise, if I heard it correctly, it seems that the sentence got away from then. I mean, look "In the Wonderland Zoo, where the Surgeon bears who stay home every, night never quarrel or fight..." what? I could be missing something, but it feels like there should be a second part to that sentence. When you added "who" to the song, it basically mean that now the verbs that come next are part of the noun that is the bears, rather than what they do (I may not have articulated that thought well, but clearly they didn't either). So you never to tell us more about the Wonderland Zoo, song. Am I wrong on this?
A quick web search says the the word is not 'surgeon' - it is supposed to be certain.
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Old 01-09-2017, 06:57 PM
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A quick web search says the the word is not 'surgeon' - it is supposed to be certain.
Supposed to be but it isn't. If someone misspoke, than these bears are canonically surgeons.
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  #221  
Old 01-10-2017, 12:21 PM
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Default Hong Kong Phooey

Hong Kong Phooey

This is one of the big ones, friend. Memorable, fun song. Premise fairly easy to take in. Pretty good animation of Hanna Barbera. It's great.



The intro decides to start big with a ticker tape parade for an unseen figure. Unseen except for the back, where he is clearly a dog in a coat.
A big question mark morphs onto the screen.

"Who is this superhero?"

The question mark morphs into a large police officer.

"Sarge?"

A janitor who clearly looks like the dog in a coat exits his closet just to shake his head no. Considering how silly and light this all is, I don't think it excepts us to be in any genuine suspense about the identity of the superhero. It's just that fun game adults like to play with kids were they are given the wrong answers to the kids amusement until you hit the right one.

Anyhoo, the morphing animation is quite good for this era of TV. But its a low bar.

"Rosemary, the telephone operator? No."

We see the question mark now turn into a telephone operator, frantically operating the phones. The janitor, cleaning a nearby table shakes his head no again.

A white question mark turns into the dog.

"Penry, the mild manner janitor?"
Penry? Huh. *checks internet* Turns out there are people named Penry. Last names, as far as I can tell.
Slyly, the dog responds "Could be."

Then we are off to the races.

But first, some competent morph animations!



Then we start with our incredibly catchy theme song. Penry dives into a filing cabinet and... uh, nothing happens. An ugly striped cat bangs on the cabinet until our hero, Hong Kong Phooey, dives out. This does a pretty good job establishing this must not be the most effective hero. And in case that was too subtle for you, he immediately jumps onto a murphy ironing board and gets smashed into the wall.

During this, Scatman Crothers croons the delightful main tune.

"Hong Kong Phooey,
#1 Super Guy.
Hong Kong Phooey,
Quicker than the human eye."

Phooney plunges onto an old couch with a non-nonplussed coolness and he is propelled into a garbage dumpster. Another Phooey boo boo? No, dawg, cause suddenly a car emerges from the dumpster. IT WAS ALL PART OF THE PLAN! I don't care if he's accident prone, that is a cool dude.

"He's got style,
a groovy smile
and a car that just won't stop!
When the going get tough
He's super tough
With a Hong Kong Phooey chop!"

It's great music and the visuals are as good. Mostly. We see Phooey driving down the road. The animation is kind of cheap, but who cares, we are already into the music. Next is slightly more... well, it's a classic "eyes in the dark" cartoon thing but compared to the rest of this, there's very little context or point. But then we are back on track with Phooey striking fighting poses.

Suddenly, a literally shadowy criminal, the embodiment of all crime emerges from the street. The All-Crime is then surprised to see Phooey coming at him with a big ole net. I think cartoon characters vastly overestimate the catching power of small nets on sticks. The All-Crime ducks out of the way by shrinking into his hat. All seems lost until the weird-lookin' cat closes a fence door, which Phooey bounces off of. Phooey then catches the crook on the way back, demonstrating that Phooey is operating with a sidekick who acts as safety net.

"Hong Kong Phooey,
#1 Super Guy.
Hong Kong Phooey,
Quicker than the human eye.
*scatting*" (because if you hire a guy named Scatman and he doesn't do that, then you made a hiring error.)

The victorious Phooey drives past the giant, caged metaphor for society's ills, then kung fu chops a gong. More scatting happens as Phooey's car turns into a helicopter, but due to cartoony hilarity, it ain't the propellers that are spinning, but the car itself. The cat face palms and we are left with a Hong Kong Phooey chop are we see that main title.

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?

Definitely. It's a really strong opening. As said, the main beats of the show are covered without it taking away from a really catchy theme. Also, a show about an incompetant problem solver actually getting his problems solved by his sidekick can be off-putting if done wrong. But look at Phooey.



That is one mellow dog. And he doesn't look high on drugs like Goober (of the Ghost Chasers). This is the natural mellowness of being one with everything. He's zen, but it's sort of a zen of ignorance towards one's lack of true talent.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

I didn't learn much, except the show only last three months.
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  #222  
Old 01-10-2017, 12:30 PM
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That car transformation at roughly the 50 second mark is incredibly visually upsetting to look at. It's like the animator threw up on the screen, if the animator was also an unknowable cosmic horror.
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  #223  
Old 01-10-2017, 12:41 PM
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Someone did not want to have to worry about animating the geometry to car's transformation, so he simply used the ungeometry of the outer kind. There is a glitch, a broken cog within our reality. And it is called the Phooeymobile.



Ha! The propeller worked wrong.
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  #224  
Old 01-10-2017, 02:56 PM
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Well it did give us this.

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  #225  
Old 01-10-2017, 07:55 PM
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I don't think I need to tell you that Rosemary has quite the fandom on deviantart.
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  #226  
Old 01-10-2017, 09:48 PM
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I don't think I need to tell you that Rosemary has quite the fandom on deviantart.
Perhaps the same could be said of all female cartoon characters. (Also, Rosemary does appear to be quite leggy.)
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Old 01-11-2017, 01:22 AM
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Are we sure the... "off-ness" of that car transformation animation is intentional on the part of the animators, and not some video artifact?
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  #228  
Old 01-11-2017, 07:31 AM
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I don't think I need to tell you that Rosemary has quite the fandom on deviantart.
Why did I google this >_<
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  #229  
Old 01-11-2017, 12:51 PM
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Default The Houndcats

The Houndcats
This is a title that smacks of

I think writers were trying to think of a new show and the meeting was so long, everyone got tired and loopy and someone was like "Ugh... geez, Idunno, Adventure Dogs? Sky Mice? Hound Cats?" and the rest were like "Fine, Houndcats. Let's just go home." But maybe I'm not being fair.



We start with a surprisingly (and forgive me if I misuse these words, because I lack proper music adjectives) grungy and dirty sound from the credits. And I don't mean grungy like the genre grunge or dirty like something sexual. I think the sound elicits a quality of heavily stained uncleanliness.

We see the title, which transforms into a very poorly animated ghost running (and I'm being generous with that choice of verb) awkwardly toward the camera, with enough time to let us linger on his terribly animated face.



Next we get the letters of the show emerging one by one out of a feild filled with the show's title. It's not terribly original but I do like it better than that terrible looking ghost.

Then we cut to our heroes in silhouette, then not. The music becomes peppier as names are called out. It kind sounds sort of square dance-y. With each one, that particular character takes his seat in an invisible car.

"Putty Puss
Muscle Mutt
Ding Dong
Rhubarb
Spark Plug
And Stutz."

I think Spark Plug is the name of the car that just materializes when its name is called. The cats and dogs drive off a background of nothing into the desert.

"Anyone doin' a wrong thing better watch out, these cats is rough."

As they drive through the desert, cards appear with their faces as the car drives on.

"Yeah, anytime there's a rumble out west,
Who can you call? You call the best.
Cause everyone knows it's as simple as that,
The best in the west is the Houndcats."

The group drives into a wordscape of their own names as we are all left to wonder "OK, but why 'hound' cats and not West Cats or Cowboy Cats or Cats Ballou?"

We now see them in a black/blue area of vagueness, menaced first by the ghost of Frank Oz.



Then the ghost of a longshoreman followed by an intimidating old guy. The old guy is kind of spooky and that is a threatening looking longshoreman, but that first ghost just isn't doing it in the scary ghost department. At best, he's the ghost of your friend's bookish dad.

The Houndcats then play tug-o-war with their car (knowing cartoons like these, I'm sure the car is anthropomorphic and is scared of something. Then the badly animated ghost from the beginning chases them away.
The Houndcats then race across another wordscape and some backroads. Then we see them chases by an automatic painting machine with many hands. Not much to say except I like that one of the hands' only job is to give a thumbs up.



"Yeah, anytime there's a rumble out west,
Who do you call? You call the best.
Cause everyone know it's simple as that,
The best in the west is the Houndcats."

We see the title again, then covered by a bunch of stickers with the character names.

The intro should end here, but then we see the car racing one more time and the title again with flying letters. Because when you animated a show called The Houndcats, you are not known for your good judgement.

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?
Naw. This seems to be another Scooby Doo rip off except with cats in the old west. That strikes me as dull. Also, the "ghosts" on Scooby Doo includes robots and monsters. For the show's flaws, the intro let us know there's a variety of crazy monsters. Clearly, the Houndcats pickin's for ghosts are slim. Plus, I only kind of get the Houndcats title. Because these are a team made up of cats and dogs. But the song only refers to them as cats. So they're also cool cats, I guess. Things aren't made clear.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

Not too much detail, except it was supposed to be a Mission: Impossible pastiche/parody, which doesn't read at all. Also, it's Ding Dog, not Ding Dong. Also, Putty Puss is still a character name. That's an unfortunate name.
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  #230  
Old 01-11-2017, 08:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Positronic Brain View Post
Why did I google this >_<
Do you want a mean and honest answer or a silly one?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Unusual View Post
We see the title, which transforms into a very poorly animated ghost running (and I'm being generous with that choice of verb) awkwardly toward the camera, with enough time to let us linger on his terribly animated face.

Could someone please put this poor bastard out of his ghostly misery?
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  #231  
Old 01-16-2017, 11:19 AM
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Default I Am The Greatest: Muhammad Ali

I Am The Greatest: Muhammad Ali

This is fascinating to me. I had never heard of this one before, which is surprising considering the novelty of having a cartoon about such a high profile celebrity. And keep in mind he was also a fairly divisive counter-cultural figure at the time, being a conscientious objector to the Vietnam war.



This is a bizarre mix of what is objectively terrible and what is objectively amazing.

We begin with our title character loosely mouthing the words "Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee." This animated of an extreme close up of Ali that looks sub-Mario Paint in it's animation quality.



When then get the title and a them song that's almost funky, but only as funky as a prime time soap opera or game show will allow.

Deciding that it is pretty hard to hide the fact that the animation is probably crazy bad, we see a series of poor-looking still shots of the former Cassius Clay.



Seriously, how is the one where his finger is pointed up not part of a meme yet? Like a "Well, actually" mansplaining meme or a "I heard that" meme (from someone who never saw You Can't Do That On Television.)

For the next 10 seconds, it shows Muhammad Ali's name as we here "Ali!" being chanted. Congrats, TV show, that ate up a little time.

But then things get real. By which I mean REALLY INSANE! And wonderfully so.

Because the next thing we see is a giant robot shooting laser beams at Ali on the moon.



That's a real thing that exists. A cartoon where Muhammad Ali fight a space robot!

Next we see a clip of him fighting an alligator. This is a step down, but only a slight one.

Then he's flying in a biplane. Again, another step one but we are still riding so high from Muhammad Ali's space adventure, this is all gravy
We then see a rainbow coloured silhouette (or it would be if the colour was so bad in this cartoon) of Ali boxing, leaving us with the knowledge that he's going to apply the sweet science to some alligators and astro-bots!

Again, we see Ali's badly animated face imploring "Now, watch the adventures of Muhammad Ali!" at which point we are back to the name of Ali flashed upon the screen. Again, voices are chanting "Ali!" "Ali!" "Ali!". But there are new voices being added to the crowd. One is mine. The rest are yours.

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?

I don't know if you remember this, but ages ago, I did a review of the Godzilla opening. In that, I turn against that otherwise awesome opening the moment Godzookey arrives and shits and farts all over the whole thing. Ali reverses that by bringing a new element that turns a poorly animated cartoon into a poorly animated masterpiece. I WILL watch this. But I might wait and just review the show episode by episode.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

Ali provides his own voice. Also, there's an episode with a werewolf.

Last edited by Johnny Unusual; 01-16-2017 at 07:17 PM.
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  #232  
Old 01-16-2017, 07:12 PM
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And somewhere Octo's face breaks into a gigantic smile.
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  #233  
Old 01-17-2017, 05:36 AM
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And somewhere Octo's face breaks into a gigantic smile.
Strongly Agree
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  #234  
Old 01-17-2017, 11:08 AM
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Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

Ali provides his own voice. Also, there's an episode with a werewolf.


I see no mention of a werewolf on Wikipedia, so you must have gotten that information from a different source.
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  #235  
Old 01-17-2017, 11:13 AM
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Ali was big into the cult-of-personality type of projects. He did The Greatest (which I think is best remembered these days as being the source of Antonio Inoki's theme music) around the same time, I think.
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  #236  
Old 01-17-2017, 01:33 PM
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I see no mention of a werewolf on Wikipedia, so you must have gotten that information from a different source.


"The Werewolf of Devil's Creek" November 19, 1977

Edit: I just skimmed through that episode. I am definitely doing a feature on it. It has an unintentionally super dark fake-out that is nothing short of accidental brilliance.
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  #237  
Old 01-17-2017, 01:43 PM
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Bah, for some reason it didn't occur to me to read the episode titles; I just saw that they weren't links and my eyes slid right past them.

That being said, I've read them now, and they are a rich vein.

"The Air Fair Affair" (If this isn't about a flying amusement park, then I will have words.)
"The Great Bluegrass Mountain Race" (Similarly, this had better not be about a mountain named "Bluegrass".)
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  #238  
Old 01-18-2017, 01:48 PM
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The Houndcats
This is a title that smacks of

I think writers were trying to think of a new show and the meeting was so long, everyone got tired and loopy and someone was like "Ugh... geez, Idunno, Adventure Dogs? Sky Mice? Hound Cats?" and the rest were like "Fine, Houndcats. Let's just go home." But maybe I'm not being fair.
I always used to find something really depressing about DePatie-Freleng cartoons as a kid. The Pink Panther was fine, but sometimes a Crazy-Legs Crane cartoon would come on or one with the Tijuana Toads, and you'd just know you were getting something third-rate. They just remind of bleak rainy days indoors with no other source of entertainment available.

They just got worse once the market for theatrical shorts dried up and they carried on producing sub HB-stuff for TV. Just watching the Houndcats intro gives you a sense of the obviousness cheapness, tired old vaudeville gags, and lame slapstick that characterises late period DP-F shows.
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  #239  
Old 01-24-2017, 11:45 AM
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This is going on hiatus. Read this in the meantime, please.
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  #240  
Old 07-17-2017, 11:57 AM
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Default Jabberjaw

Jabberjaw

All I know about Jabberjaw is that it has a shark who sounds like Curly from the Three Stooges who hangs around with teen. In theory, this sounds insane and Octo-Good. But even Octo knows this is a lie, with the knowledge that this is from the 70's. Because the only good cartoon from the 70's is I AM THE GREATEST: THE ADVENTURES OF MUHAMMAD ALI.


So we start things off colorfully enough, with Jabberjaw and some colorful teens playing in a band together, mostly because that was one of the only two reasons you could have teens wandering from town to town, getting involved in strange adventures. And it does all look delightful. Look, taking advantage of the fact that they have an anthropomorphic shark in their band, they made everything aquatic themed.



See, there's a swordfish guitar, an anchor bass (doubly appropriate for that deep, heavy sound a bass has), drums played by a shark, some... tamborines (maybe up close they have jellyfish painted on the skins) and an oyster barbacue. I think it is supposed to be a keyboard, but none of the keys are visible to me at this resolution.

We transition scenes with the help of a lot of bubbles and a sort of Robotrony video game sound. We then see Jabberjaw swimming along when he runs into a dragon. He turns around only to see a giant, slightly different Zorak. He then makes the Curly "whoop-whoop-whoop-whoop-whoop" noises and swims away to a domed, underwater city.
"Jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabberjaw!
The most futuristic shark you ever saw!"

I'm sure he's a triumph of genetic engenering but I have a rebuttal.


But please, continue.

"He can walk and talk and walk."

Seems to me if you have a character named Jabberjaw, then it is the talking aspect you should say twice. But we do see him walking, sneaking along with this series version of Shaggy (I'm going to say... Soggy?), walking on his back fins.

It is then Jabberjaw is accosted by a robot, then is flanked by three very weird looking dudes with Tridents. The dudes include a dumpy version of Triton from the Inhumans, some generic looking bad guy with greyish skin and a knight in armor.

Jabberjaw then says "*unintelligible* believe it!"

"He's so shar (?) the things he does are!
Unbelievi."

I feel like I was supposed to be able to hear "Sharp" (or maybe "sure") and "unbelievable" but the sound mixing is pretty bad, so it's kind of hard to make out.

Anyway, Jabberjaw dodges the guard by pretending to be a shark-skin rug and the guard, who should have just scene him capering about, just run past him. After they exit, he springs up in triumph. The screen is soon covered by panels of our hero doing wacky things like reading on the beach, brushing his teeth, taking a shower, playing golf, playing drums and wearing a karate gi. This is all delightful as these are things that most sharks do not do. Except, of course, the Street Sharks.

Anyway, we close in on the picture of him in a karate gi and watch him hilariously fail at karate. Oh, Jabberjaw, will you ever learn? Or do you have a debilitating mental disorder that makes his impossible. You are truly a tragic figure.

"Jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabberjaw!
I'm the latest, greatest shark you ever saw!"

Again, rebuttal.



Anyway, we next see some unseen supervillain capturing Jabberjaw's crew with some sort of rope claw thing. They alll yell in unison and Jabberjaw arrives and breaks them out of a cage by ramming it with his body.

"When his friends get in a jam,
They just call on this big ham,
Jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabberjaw!
Jabberjaw!
Maybe the funniest shark you ever saw."

I appeciate that you put maybe, this time, taking into account that there a lot of sharks. But based on this intro, I'm very certain there are funnier sharks. I will grant him he is likely funnier than the sharks from Shark Tale, though.

Anyway, we get one more "Jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabber-jabberjaw!" and a shot of the whole team. Then we see Jabberjaw pick up and kiss one of the girls, who gets upset Lucy Van Pelt style (presumably shouting "Aargh! Shark germs!"). In response, Jabberjaw jumps into Soggy's arms and says "I don't get no respect" while shrugging.

Where to begin here? First, you are already stealing Curly's bit and now all of a sudden you are ripping off Rodney Dangerfield. Not cool. At least Curly was long buried when you started robbing his grave for your shtick, but Rodney was still a big deal at the time. Now I'm imaging that he just randomly said contemporary comedy lines appropos of nothing

"Well, excuuuuuuse meeeeeee."

"Ya hockey puck!"

"A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff."

"The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit."

"Take away the right to say 'fuck' and you take away the right to say 'fuck the government', nyuk nyuk nyuk."

But my other problem is that his catch phrase should be "I don't get no consent, because you don't go around picking up and kissing your band mates like that without asking first. Not cool, giant drum playing shark.

Anyway, we see the title and he says "Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk" and that's it for that horseshit.

Did It Make Me Want to Watch It?

Nope. This was amongst the least interesting of the bizarre genre of kids in a band and their talking animal/supernatural entity friend solve mysteries while wandering the Earth. That said, it was a fairly colorful openng. I'll take what I can get.

Now I look on Wikipedia to learn more about the show

The Shaggy rip-off is named Clamhead. I wasn't even close. His catchphrases are "Abba-abba-abba!" and "Wowee-wow-wow-wow!" because catchprases are the worst. Woozle-wuzzle, everybody.

And apparently, their tours only go to undersea cities.

Oh, and in the future, robots don't let sharks into the cities, meaning it dealt with the issue of prejudice through the eyes of a shark that sounds like a dead Vaudevillian.

Fan Art
This is a new feature. Jabberjaw has some surprsingly great fan art.


And for some reason, he's also one of the bad guys from Bleach.
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