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Movie Time 2.0: TT mini reviews

lincolnic

can stop, will stop
(he/him)
I watched the new Mortal Kombat so that nobody else has to -- this movie was dumb and bad, and not in the fun way it was supposed to be.
 

4-So

Spicy
Alternatively, the new Mortal Kombat is dumb and bad and absolutely worth a watch. Same great dumbass energy as the original 90s flick. If I have one complaint, it's that the ultimate fight would have been the penultimate fight in any other movie. It ended on a note that felt like it wasn't finished which makes sense: they are obviously fishing for a sequel, considering the end sequence.
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
The Flying Guillotine 2

I'm actually surprised to find the Flying Guillotine AND the Flying Guillotine 2 don't have Wikipedia pages. Master of the Flying Guillotine does, though, and is considered better than the other movies but it also isn't a sequel to that and is instead a sequel to One Armed Boxer. Anyway, this is an OK kung fu film where a new "Double Flying Guillotine" is invented to defeat the man who defeated the Flying Guillotine. But most of the story is actually about the woman who is assigned to infiltrate the evil emperor's secret army and risk everything to steal the plans so that the protagonist of the first movie can invent a way to overcome it. Its simultaneously more of a romp and yet is also a much more nihilistic little movie than the first but its not a bad adventure movie.
 
Happy Alien day TT.

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m7OoTY8l.jpg
 

Zef

Find Your Reason
(He/Him)
How did the actor even SEE out of that thing? And was the snap-jaw animated only for closeups, where the whole head could be a puppet, or was it spring-loaded in the suit too?
 
I have no idea about the vision or the jaw. I would imagine that that info is on the special features of one of the Alien DVDs or Blu-rays.

I visited my brother in Seattle in 2018. At the time, MoPOP (Museum of Pop Culture) had an exhibit with a lot horror and sci-fi movie costumes and props. Images above are from that exhibit.

Normal Fan: I like Alien. I'm going to buy the special edition Alien Blu-ray.
Paul Allen: I like Alien. I'm going to buy the actual Alien from the movie.
 
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Kirin

Summon for hire
(he/him)
Just depends on your budget for the stuff you really like! I own a prop from Pacific Rim. A reasonably cheap prop, mind you. (A tray and food packaging set from the mess hall scenes.)
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
How did the actor even SEE out of that thing? And was the snap-jaw animated only for closeups, where the whole head could be a puppet, or was it spring-loaded in the suit too?
The mask looks slightly transparent right around the eyes, and there weren’t a lot of scenes where the Xenomorph was in full view and especially mobile, it probably had enough visibility for that much.

Im assuming there was a second more elaborate mask for close ups for the inner mouth, but that’s a guess on my part
 

Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
The Reluctant Dragon

Less a movie and more like a promo for the Disney studio studded with cartoon nuggets. The film is humourist and not the writer of Jaws Robert Benchley has he roams the Disney studio, dodging a PA with a real Hitler Youth's AV club-vibe. It feels like a lavish ad for the studio but has some actual interesting behind the scenes stuff and occasional casual racism. Some of the cartoons are good enough, like one told in storyboard (while introducing to audiences what a story board is) Baby Weems, about the world's smartest baby. The big one is the title tale and its fine, the story of a gentle dragon and the knight sent to slay him who end up getting on but decide to hold a fake fight and concoct a redemption tale for the dragon who needs none. Its OK but not memorable and seems a shame to hang the entire film around. Frankly, calling the movie this seems like a bait and switch for young kids who want a wacky dragon and must sit through a middle aged man wandering around a film studio, as much humour as the film tries to add to it.
 

clarice

bebadosamba
I saw recently

Secret Sunshine

A story about grief and all of that. A very hard watch. Powerful. Love Lee Chang-dong's movies.

Stray Dog

Early Kurosawa movie about a cop who had his gun stolen and sees himself in the culprit. I was surprised that i actually didn't like it very much! Kurosawa is not that good at social commentary (although i love One Wonderful Sunday). But it is a fine movie and everything fits together nicely. It reminds me of the Donald Richie comment that Kurosawa had better scripts in his early work, because he wrote with more people or something. I don't remember it very well...
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
All Disney Canon Watch continues with Lady and the Tramp, and I was surprised to see a racism warning, considering how the cast is almost entirely talking animal. But ol‘ Walt finds a way! At least it was “Grandpa Don’t Know No Better“ racism, and not the active hate crime that was Peter Pan.

Discounting Racist Cats (and a Chihuahua... and an Italian), the movie was honestly probably the single best looking movie they’ve put out so far. It also opened with a dedication to dogs in general, so I appreciated that. Tramp had a kind of Burt Reynolds quality to himself, which is an unconventional thing to compare a stray dog to.

The films real villain, other than racism, was the old lady. Hey old lady, maybe don’t bring several entire cats with you when you’re dog and baby sitting. Furthermore, i think rule one of dog sitting is not immediately blaming every problem in the house on the dog and let the dog get arrested by the DOG COPS.

I was expecting a dog jailbreak by the end, but there wasn’t one, so I guess they all died. So that’s a bummer!

The Italian Chef is weirdly invested in the romantic life of a stray dog in his neighborhood.
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
That explains why I conflate the two movies so often...

Also, this was the first one produced by Buena Vista, as opposed to RKO.
 

R.R. Bigman

Coolest Guy
After several years of putting it off, I watched War for the Planet of the Apes. The entire trilogy is very good. I think I might have liked the first two better, though.
 

Violentvixen

(She/Her)
Watched My Octopus Teacher last night. Some very cool footage and cool new things learned about the animals but I'm still waffling on the human, he gets a bit annoying at times. I wouldn't let that stop you from watching it though.
 
Enjoyed Mortal Kombat. Mortal Kombatants handsome. Slight disappointment with Mileena who spent most of the movie looking like she was just a messy eater with a normal mouth, then got her cool mouth 15 seconds before dying. No mouth carnage...
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
I feel confident in saying that Mars Attacks was the last movie Tim Burton had fun making. Especially in the back-half when it just becomes a straight up violent Loony Tunes movie, in the best tradition of Gremlins.

Every single character in it (and the cast is as star-studded as anything I've ever seen) is absolutely having the time of their life, the CG holds up surprisingly well, and I just love the design of the Martians.

Also, Lisa Marie as the Female Alien manages to LOOK like she's bad CG because she is a human uncanny valley.

Love this movie.
 
John Carpenter loves to cast Nancy Stevens in minor roles saying right-on things (nurse who is like, “you are a terrible mental health professional, dr loomis” in Halloween and gleeful terrorist in Escape from New York) and I like to see it.
 
I watched the Meg on cable while I was at my parents house.

I thought it was okay. There are some fun giant shark sequences. But outside of some fun giant shark action, the characters are extremely forgettable.

I would say if you're looking for the ultimate b shark movie, watch Deep Blue Sea.

I've never seen Jaws. I don't know if it would be considered a b movie.
 

Olli

(he/him)
I knew it was going to be bad going in, but Angel Has Fallen felt like a letdown even in the "are you a bad enough dude to rescue the president" genre. At least London Has Fallen was set in an interesting location; this one was a mix of boring New England forests and boring hospital/office spaces. It takes like 3 seconds to guess the villain and their plot, too. Gerard Butler is definitely getting too old for this sh*t; I can't believe they have 3 further movies planned for the franchise.
 
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Johnny Unusual

(He/Him)
Sartana is Coming, Trade Your Pistol for a Coffin

Hey, it turns out there IS another official Sartana movie on Prime. In this one, its a battle of wits for gold and stuff and Sartana must match wits with a gunslinging fancy boy. The twist at the end makes the big dumb finale actually make more sense and its a fun movie overall. I like that he comes up with weird, little plans that feel almost more like affectation than real plans and its a lot of fun.
 

Octopus Prime

Mysterious Contraption
(He/Him)
I haven’t felt particularly inclined to watch any of those movies, but my God, the entire Sartana series has to have the best titles I’ve ever seen
 
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