Like millions of others, I consider Popeye to be an emotional bulwark in the turbulence of life.
So we're kicking off with Beyond the Ice Palace 2, which, as the title suggests, is a sequel to Beyond the Ice Palace. Which, I have never heard of, but apparently was a PC Castlevania-em-up from 1988. So this particular bun has been in the oven for a minute. And, like all buns that spent 37 years in the oven, it's fresh as hell, now.
It still looks like Castlevania, with the serial numbers filled out. Explore a monster filled spooky castle with a whip guy who would *really* prefer this castle not have so many monsters in it, then gradually expand his arsenal and abilities based on how well he's exploring because that's how you troid, baby!
Speaking of things in well established genres based on surprisingly long running franchises, what comic strip lends itself best to the video game format? Well... probably Flash Gordan, that series became an absolute masterpiece after Dan Schkade took over.
...holy crap, how have we not gotten a Flash Gordan game based on that yet.
Anyway... it's not Flash Gordon. Or Dick Tracy or Popeye, or Nancy or Heathcliff Or Wallace the Brave, or Rae the Doe or Alley Oop. Or Hi and Lois or Snuffy Smith. No, it's The Phantom. The Billy Zane one. You know, the guy who slammed evil. That one.
Anyway, he's got a beat-em-up now. To its credit, it does look very authentic to the strip, and the last Phantom back in the SNES days game was *weirdly* good. But c'mon guys; give me a Mary Worth game. Something I can sink my teeth into.
Speaking of sinking things, that was kind of the impetuous of Overboard, the *really really good* point and clicky adventure game where you had to figure out how to get away with the crime of having chucked your husband over the side of a boat. Well, GOOD NEWS murder-fans, because that got a sequel! Expelled! In this one you're a student at an all girls school who doesn't want to be expelled for attempted murder and it's up to YOU to... figure out how to avoid that.
The expulsion part, not attempting a murder; that ships already sailed.
But as long as someones on the hook for it, y'know... that's fine. No wrong answers.
Speaking of sowing plausible deniability in the act of murder, we have B.E.A.S.T., a hero shooter starring a bunch of cartoony varmints in mecha that kind of looks like Overwatch, if everyone was DVA and also a Star Fox.
'
Scamper about a battlefield and shoot a weird cartoon frog, why don't you?
Now if you prefer your giant mecha blasting to not involve cartoon warthogs and the like, but would rather the abstract pixel art of a 1986 computer game p'raps I could interest you this weeks Egg Console game; Super Xenon Gamma 5, which is one of the rare Egg Console games to not really be impeded by a lack of any localization efforts! I infer it's got a kind of Star Luster/Star Fox 2 thing going on where it's a shooter half the time and a strategy game the rest of the time, but abstract 1986 PC graphics, as well as a litany of spelling errors from English not being the first language of anyone who developed it, make it kind of hard to parse what I'm supposed to be looking at.
And bringing up the rear is this weeks biggest release by far; the Gameboy component of the NSO updated and with it, we got Donkey Kong '94, the absolutely transcendent remake of Donkey Kong that is easily on the short-list of best games on the original Gameboy. We also got Mario Picross, which I would not rate *as* highly, but, like... only in comparison; it's still among the very best puzz-em-ups on the Gameboy and that was a crowded field.
Okay, Go to Bed
So we're kicking off with Beyond the Ice Palace 2, which, as the title suggests, is a sequel to Beyond the Ice Palace. Which, I have never heard of, but apparently was a PC Castlevania-em-up from 1988. So this particular bun has been in the oven for a minute. And, like all buns that spent 37 years in the oven, it's fresh as hell, now.
It still looks like Castlevania, with the serial numbers filled out. Explore a monster filled spooky castle with a whip guy who would *really* prefer this castle not have so many monsters in it, then gradually expand his arsenal and abilities based on how well he's exploring because that's how you troid, baby!
Speaking of things in well established genres based on surprisingly long running franchises, what comic strip lends itself best to the video game format? Well... probably Flash Gordan, that series became an absolute masterpiece after Dan Schkade took over.
...holy crap, how have we not gotten a Flash Gordan game based on that yet.
Anyway... it's not Flash Gordon. Or Dick Tracy or Popeye, or Nancy or Heathcliff Or Wallace the Brave, or Rae the Doe or Alley Oop. Or Hi and Lois or Snuffy Smith. No, it's The Phantom. The Billy Zane one. You know, the guy who slammed evil. That one.
Anyway, he's got a beat-em-up now. To its credit, it does look very authentic to the strip, and the last Phantom back in the SNES days game was *weirdly* good. But c'mon guys; give me a Mary Worth game. Something I can sink my teeth into.
Speaking of sinking things, that was kind of the impetuous of Overboard, the *really really good* point and clicky adventure game where you had to figure out how to get away with the crime of having chucked your husband over the side of a boat. Well, GOOD NEWS murder-fans, because that got a sequel! Expelled! In this one you're a student at an all girls school who doesn't want to be expelled for attempted murder and it's up to YOU to... figure out how to avoid that.
The expulsion part, not attempting a murder; that ships already sailed.
But as long as someones on the hook for it, y'know... that's fine. No wrong answers.
Speaking of sowing plausible deniability in the act of murder, we have B.E.A.S.T., a hero shooter starring a bunch of cartoony varmints in mecha that kind of looks like Overwatch, if everyone was DVA and also a Star Fox.
'
Scamper about a battlefield and shoot a weird cartoon frog, why don't you?
Now if you prefer your giant mecha blasting to not involve cartoon warthogs and the like, but would rather the abstract pixel art of a 1986 computer game p'raps I could interest you this weeks Egg Console game; Super Xenon Gamma 5, which is one of the rare Egg Console games to not really be impeded by a lack of any localization efforts! I infer it's got a kind of Star Luster/Star Fox 2 thing going on where it's a shooter half the time and a strategy game the rest of the time, but abstract 1986 PC graphics, as well as a litany of spelling errors from English not being the first language of anyone who developed it, make it kind of hard to parse what I'm supposed to be looking at.
And bringing up the rear is this weeks biggest release by far; the Gameboy component of the NSO updated and with it, we got Donkey Kong '94, the absolutely transcendent remake of Donkey Kong that is easily on the short-list of best games on the original Gameboy. We also got Mario Picross, which I would not rate *as* highly, but, like... only in comparison; it's still among the very best puzz-em-ups on the Gameboy and that was a crowded field.
Okay, Go to Bed
