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  #61  
Old 01-05-2017, 03:50 PM
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Alonne can beat up a bundle of bones.

Rom wins by the "everything from Bloodborne can beat up everything from not Bloodborne" rule which is going to make all of my votes going forward very boring but there's really no exceptions. Uh but to make this commentary less boring, uh, the big spider would trip up the fatty tree with a bunch of little spiders and then destroy it with sky lasers while it was struggling with the camera.
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  #62  
Old 01-05-2017, 04:08 PM
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Alonne would definitely slick up them skeletons.

The second fight is way crazier. I think I'd give the edge to Curse Rotted Greatwood because Rom wouldn't be able to reach most of his weakpoints.
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  #63  
Old 01-05-2017, 05:15 PM
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I haven't fought Alonne (I'm assuming he's a DLC boss) but I imagine he can win.

Also voting for Curse Rotted Greatwood because of what Patrick said. Even Rom's sky lasers might not hit the right weak points. I hate that fucking tree.
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  #64  
Old 01-05-2017, 05:46 PM
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Alonne is sick-nasty fast and strong. Those bones got no chance with him zipping around all over the dang old place.

Curse-Rotted Greatwood. I don't know Rom, but CRG is tall and has big smashy hands and poison gases for bugs. But just from the description, I would totally want to see that fight.
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  #65  
Old 01-05-2017, 06:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paul le Fou View Post
Alonne is sick-nasty fast and strong. Those bones got no chance with him zipping around all over the dang old place.

Curse-Rotted Greatwood. I don't know Rom, but CRG is tall and has big smashy hands and poison gases for bugs. But just from the description, I would totally want to see that fight.
I defer to Paul on this one.
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  #66  
Old 01-05-2017, 08:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loki View Post
Attack: 3/10 Shoots some magic, splits up. Nothing threatening.
Defense: 1/10 It's just a guys in a cape.
Speed: 5/10 Teleports around but never far.
Gumption: 9/10 Hosting the worst family reunion for basically forever.
Likes: Alone time, sticks and twigs, big ol' coffins.
Dislikes: Nagging wives, bratty kids
Hey, why aren't you including this stuff anymore?
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  #67  
Old 01-05-2017, 08:17 PM
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It was taking too long to write.
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  #68  
Old 01-06-2017, 10:59 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loki View Post
It was taking too long to write.
Yeah, and Loki has a wife and a kid and a dog and a job even!
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  #69  
Old 01-06-2017, 07:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loki View Post
It was taking too long to write.
OK. Carry on then.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Falselogic View Post
Yeah, and Loki has a wife and a kid and a dog and a job even!
Oh my!
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  #70  
Old 01-06-2017, 07:34 PM
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Say, did anyone ever clear up that Penetrator v Crystal Sage tie?
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  #71  
Old 01-06-2017, 07:35 PM
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Nope! I asked TK to but he refuses to participate in this thread because BB is a PS4 exclusive.
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  #72  
Old 01-06-2017, 08:14 PM
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Penetrator.
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  #73  
Old 01-06-2017, 10:36 PM
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Awesome! Thank you.
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  #74  
Old 01-08-2017, 07:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Torzelbaum
Hey, why aren't you including this stuff anymore?
Also nobody laughed at my Michael J. Fox joke.

Alonne passes easily (though I did think there would be more fondess for skeletons), and Greatwood makes a surprise showing!

Lightweight Division



Capra Demon

We've got an interesting match up today. In this corner: Capra, that fucker.

VS.



Iudex Gundyr, that bitch. Both are infamous for being tough as nails. Capra duel wields dogs and is relentlessness in his pursuit of victory. He hits fast and hard. Gundyr is no slouch with a spear and after a few blows he erupts into a tar dinosaur. This one could go either way.

Arena

The princes' bedroom atop Lothric. Plenty of room for a t-rex to get it's pus on.

Heavyweight Division



Darkbeast Paarl

Who's Paarl? No one knows. He is a darkbeast tho, which in BB means he's covered in lightning. Big, fast, sparky. Still, he's not much more than bones and scraps of skin.

VS.



Bed of Chaos

A bunch of trees that are on fire or something. A horrible boss because she causes the floor to fall out under you with no rhyme or reason. Still, ultimately, just a bug.

Arena

The Royal Wood. The forested ruins where you fight Artorias. Is this place unstable enough for Bed to pull off her signature move? Only you can say for sure.

Voting ends tomorrow at 09:50:00 EST.
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  #75  
Old 01-08-2017, 09:39 AM
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Iudex Gundyr for sure. Capra's strength comes from his use of his tight arena + his dog ambush. In the prince's hall, Capra would have to make judicious use of the pillars with his dogs to have a chance, but I think it's not enough and Iudex is too fast to get caught up on it.


I dunno how big or fast the paarl of the orient is and actually BoC could be a tough annoying, shitty fight. The beating heart of chaotic demon fire could do nasty things with the trees all around, if not just ignite the whole forest. And bits of the forest are indeed collapsing... albeit, into the abyss, the antipode of chaos. I dunno if that would like cancel it out or what.
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  #76  
Old 01-08-2017, 11:43 PM
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I beat Gundyr much quicker than I did Capra so that's that.

Bed of Chaos is a joke fight so Paarl it is!
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  #77  
Old 01-09-2017, 09:58 AM
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Gundyr and Capra are tied and maybe Bed and Paarl too I can't figure out Paul's post.

Someone tie break!
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  #78  
Old 01-09-2017, 10:08 AM
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I didn't really vote before because I dunno but I'll vote Paarl because fuck bed of chaos
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  #79  
Old 01-09-2017, 10:08 AM
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Great thanks! Paarl it is.
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  #80  
Old 01-09-2017, 11:33 AM
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Sorry, I forgot to vote. Gundyr and Paarl!
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  #81  
Old 01-10-2017, 08:21 AM
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Thanks Patrick. Gundyr moves on. Couldn't even save his firekeeper, but moves on. Likewise Paarl, who even is he????

Lightweight Division



The Lost Sinner

She's got a manacle on her hands and a bug in her eyes. She can slink into shadows and getya when you don't expect it.

VS.



Burnt Ivory King

He's got a magic sword and icy magic at call. But, to keep things fair, we're going to say he doesn't have all his bros to back him up. Does this put him on equal ground as the Sinner, only you can say.

Arena

1-3 antechamber, where the Penetrator doth roam. Nice and shadowy here, to the Sinner's salvation.

Heavyweight Division



Yhorm the Giant

Just a big ol' doofer. I don't know how this guy fares against anything but the Storm Ruler, so I can't comment on his prowess. It doesn't matter, tho, because he's up against.



The Dragon God

The dwarves of moria dug too deep and unleashed an ancient evil. Luckily they also build harpoon cannons to trivialize it. Without them, is Dragon God even beatable?!?

Arena

What do you think? I feel like I shouldn't randomize this and just say Dragon God can only be fought at the bottom of Stonefang. He is tied up after all.

Voting ends at 10:30:00 EST tomorrow.
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  #82  
Old 01-10-2017, 08:44 AM
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Yeah Gundyr! DS3 didn't grab me the way the early games in the series did, but Gundyr is pretty much flawless in both incarnations. I ended up buying his helmet and building my character around it because I liked the boss & character so much. There's not a ton there, but I really like what little you learn about him and how he's presented.

I think Burnt Ivory King would stomp the lost Sinner. They have similar movesets, but BIK is much faster and has better tricks. Plus, he enters through a fiery portal!

If the fight in is Stonefang, Yhorm should be able to win it. He's too big to hide behind pillars, but he also has all of the HP. He's probably the beefiest boss in the series by a pretty big margin. I just checked and he has 1.5x the HP of the Ancient Dragon from DS2. He beats the Orphan of Kos by even more.
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  #83  
Old 01-10-2017, 06:01 PM
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I only recognize Yhorm.

So he wins it all!
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  #84  
Old 01-11-2017, 02:24 PM
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These are both awesome fights.

Yhorm and the Dragon are both really hard (dragon impossible?) to beat by normal means. Assuming Yhorm doesn't use harpoons and the dragon doesn't use a stormruler, that would be a big knock-down drag-out clash of titans. I don't know what the dragon does quite well enough but I bet Yhorm could take him.

In a pure 1v1 with the Lost Sinner... (Or assuming that the Sinner has Eleum Loyce knights with her in the melee)... That's a pretty close fight, but I have to give it to the Lost Sinner. They're pretty similar swordyswords, but Sinner's a little bit faster and a little bit more mobile, with her jumps and such. And if she has shadows to disappear in, all the better.
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